Money Diary: A Policy Advisor On £40,000
This week: "I'm 29 and live with my fiancé in Auckland, New Zealand. We were living in London for the last three years and while all of our friends were starting to buy houses and plan weddings, we decided that this was likely our last chance for a big adventure before settling down. So we packed up our life into two rucksacks, spent eight weeks travelling in Asia and then landed in New Zealand at the start of 2025. We knew going into this that we would only be here for two years, so while here we're really trying to get out and see as much of this beautiful country as possible, although it is getting to winter now, so that has dialled back a bit. I was able to get a similar job to the one I was doing in London, working in the New Zealand civil service on planning and environmental policy. I also got a fair-sized pay rise when moving here. The cost of living (except groceries) is cheaper than London, so we're trying to capitalise on extra disposable income and put away as much as possible for both travelling in NZ and for our wedding which is booked for summer 2027 in the UK."
Occupation: Policy advisor
Industry: Government
Age: 29
Location: Auckland, New Zealand
Salary: £40,000
Joint income: £80,000. Prior to moving we split nearly everything equally, S would pick up extra bits and pieces of fun money as he earnt more but since moving to NZ, we only opened one joint bank account that both salaries are paid into so we share everything now.
Assets: £12,500 in a help-to-buy ISA that my parents set up for me. My partner has £15,000 inheritance locked away in a two-year high-interest ISA and about £9,000 in a Help-to-Buy that should reach £12,500 by the time we move back home and want to buy a house. We also have about £6,000 in an ISA earmarked for our wedding.
Debt: N/A
Paycheque Amount: £1,145 fortnightly.
Pronouns: She/her
Monthly Expenses
Monthly Housing Costs: £1,235, includes water (split between me and S).
Utilities: £35 wifi, £71 electricity — this is for both of us, so I pay half of this.
Number of Housemates: One — my fiancé, S.
Monthly Loan Payments: £113 student loan. I have to do this manually as I currently live abroad and it is a pain.
Pension: I don't pay into a NZ pension but will rejoin the UK civil service pension scheme when we move back in two years' time.
All Other Monthly Expenses: £36 monthly SIM-only plan (for both of us), £134 monthly joint gym membership (this is so expensive, but the gym has a pool and is very close to our flat so I really make the most of it), £20 fortnightly wonky veg box.
Did you participate in any form of higher education? If yes, how did you pay for it?
I did a four-year integrated master's in chemistry, with an industry year, using Student Finance England for the course fees. Doing an integrated master's is great as course fees are included in your "first degree", so you don't have to self-fund the master's, unlike most post-grad master's degrees. My student loan didn't quite cover my rent, so my parents kindly helped top that up and then, jointly with my grandparents, sent me a £70 per week for food, going out etc. I am eternally grateful for this as it meant I didn't have to work while studying. During my industry year, I was paid so they didn't have to send any money for that year. They haven't asked for any of this back (despite my offering), so I have vowed to do the same for my children in the future. I then went on to do a PhD. I was paid a £17,000 tax-free stipend for this, so I was mostly independent except for my phone contract and Spotify account.
Growing up, what kind of conversations did you have about money? Did your parent/guardian(s) educate you about finances?
Up until recently the only money conversations we had were to not get a credit card or buy anything on finance as that means debt which is bad. More recently my dad has got the pension bee in his bonnet and brings up starting a private pension regularly!
What was your first job and why did you get it?
I joked with an older friend that her Saturday job in a bakery was the dream job and two weeks later, she had got me a trial shift. I started at 14 and worked there on Saturdays until I moved out for university — picking up extra shifts when home in the uni holidays. The best part was the bakery was closed on a Sunday so the lovely owners allowed us 'Saturday girls' to take home the leftover cream cakes that wouldn't last until Monday, my family LOVED it.
Did you worry about money growing up?
I never felt that we had money issues when I was younger. We were told to wait for Christmas or birthdays if we ever wanted new stuff and we never went out for dinner or got takeaways, but I often thought this was just my parents being strict! Now I'm older, through conversations with my mum, I've realised how much they must have struggled, but they did an amazing job of hiding it from us. They always prioritised experiences, like gigs, cinema trips and holidays over material goods and random treats, which made my childhood really special. My grandparents lived in Spain for a period of my childhood, so we spent a fair few summer holidays at their villa, which my brother and I loved. On reflection, this must have been a great way to take us on holiday every year for relatively little.
Do you worry about money now?
I wouldn't say I worry, as I feel we are in a pretty good position financially. But I do constantly think about money — should I buy that coffee, is this the cheapest brand of yoghurt in the food shop, do I really need this new top, always looking for the bargain etc. My dad and grandpa have definitely passed down the frugal Yorkshire mindset and years of being a student and then living on a low salary in London have only reinforced that in me. The only time I break out of it is when eating out, haha!
At what age did you become financially responsible for yourself and does anyone else cover any aspects of your financial life?
I'm not sure I can say that I am. I'm incredibly lucky that my parents set aside money for me to buy a house and they pay for my Spotify subscription (and until we moved abroad my phone too). I'm also very aware that I don't have to pay the single tax, and I'm very fortunate that S earns a good amount too. I know that my parents and grandparents would help out without hesitation if we ever did fall on hard times, which is very reassuring.
Do you or have you ever received passive or inherited income?
My parents have been gradually setting aside money in an ISA (and later transferred this to a help-to-buy ISA) since I was little, without which buying a house in the next few years would be impossible! Both my parents and S's mum have indicated that they would like to financially help out with the wedding, however we haven't sorted the details with them yet.
Day One
6 a.m. — S's alarm goes off and I try but fail to roll back over to sleep, normally I get another 30-40 mins snoozing but not today. Noticing I'm awake, S brings through a cup of tea like the gem he is while I catch up with messages from the UK and read my Kindle.
7 a.m. — Get dressed for the gym and head out for an early morning workout.
8:20 a.m. — Back home, showered and starting work with my standard breakfast of homemade granola, yogurt, a sprinkling of vanilla protein powder and defrosted frozen berries (raspberries this week). Fruit, especially berries, can be SO expensive here so buying a frozen bag and defrosting a few overnight is by far the most cost-effective way to make my favourite breakfast.
11:30 a.m. — Finished an interesting cross-agency meeting and grab a cup of tea and a little Anzac biscuit that I made yesterday for a morning snack.
12:10 p.m. — Pop out to the shops to grab some beauty essentials that I've been holding back on buying while we have been trying to recoup a bit of our financial buffer after moving. Pick up some tights, toner, blush, body scrub and CeraVe SA body cream to try to get rid of my keratosis pilaris, £38.40. I've never tried overly hard to get rid of it before, but I've read that it takes a bit of trial and error to get the right products for your skin and I want to make sure I don't feel self-conscious about it at our wedding.
12:50 p.m. — Make a quesadilla for lunch back at my desk and get back into work.
2 p.m. — Fill in an expense claim for my employer's wellbeing allowance scheme. We can apply for up to £200 reimbursement of health and wellness related costs per year, including a gym membership! We pay for a shared membership so I'm hoping that this doesn't cause too much confusion in the expense process.
4:30 p.m. — Clock off from work and do a bit of my paint by numbers before cooking some tea for S and I. A quick and easy carrot and parsnip puff pastry open tart with little roasted potato cubes.
6:30 p.m. — Head out to book club. I joined a book club when we moved here after never being part of a book club before and have loved the welcoming environment, meeting new people and chatting about books (this month was Yellowface)! Just drink tap water as I'll be having weeknight drinks with work on Thursday.
9 p.m. — Home and cups of tea in bed while reading the Great Granny Webster (not a book club read). Learnt at book club that there is a massive backlog on next month's book (The Salt Path) at the library, so buy it for my Kindle, £4.99.
Day Two
6:40 a.m. — Managed to roll over and snooze this morning. Scrolling and message catch-up with my morning cuppa.
7:15 a.m. — Shower, makeup, pack my bag and eat the normal breakfast of yoghurt, granola and berries with a glass of OJ.
8:10 a.m. — Hop on the bus listening to the Sean Penn episode of the Louis Theroux Podcast, £2.05.
8:40 a.m. — Arrive at work, grab a glass of water and get stuck into writing a procurement plan and emailing paper authors to let them know our quality assurance panel is assessing their paper.
10:30 a.m. — Make a cup of tea in the office to enjoy with another Anzac biscuit, get distracted by a team calls and the tea goes cold before I manage to eat my biscuit.
12 p.m. — I love that people in my current office love an early lunch, none of this waiting around until 1 p.m., which really suits my hungry tum! There is also a great culture of going to the kitchen rather than eating at your desk and taking the full hour, much better than my experience in UK civil service departments. Leftovers from last night for lunch.
1 p.m. — Catch up on a couple of briefings that went up to the minister this week, both are over 25 pages, so this is quite the task!
2:50 p.m. — Afternoon slump hitting hard, so pop out to buy some sweets (or lollies as they're called in NZ) for the office lollie jar, £4.77. Walk past a cafe and treat myself to a flat white to keep me going through these dense papers, £2.30.
4:45 p.m. — Bus home and straight to the gym with S, £2.05.
7 p.m. — Gym done, back home for shower and hair wash, and soon I'm wolfing down mac 'n' cheese that S added Quorn chicken pieces to for extra protein.
8 p.m. — Watch on Race Across the World while S does some marking for school. Honestly, if I could go on any TV show it would be this one in a heartbeat...just got to decide who I would do it with.
9:45 p.m. — S finally finishes marking so we snuggle up in bed and read for a very short while before dozing off.
Total: £11.17
Day Three
6:10 a.m. — Not doing a very good job of snoozing on a morning! The only benefit is I get a good hour of reading and phone catch up with a cuppa from S before needing to get in the shower.
7:15 a.m. — S informs me he's bought tickets for the rugby on Saturday,£9.50. Shower, dressed, makeup, standard granola breakfast and pack my bag for work.
8:05 a.m. — Head out in the rain to catch the bus, listening to Off Menu on the way, £2.05. Get into work slightly soggy and get started on addressing comments on a policy paper I wrote.
11 a.m. — Morning tea break with a homemade granola bar.
12:30 p.m. — Leftovers for lunch and meet with a newly formed office social committee to try and get some more social events off the ground.
1:30 p.m. — Catch-up with other advisors in my wider work area, we meet every few weeks to stay in touch with other work that is going on and act as a support network and sounding board. Being based at a different office to the majority of other people in my work area, I really appreciate these catch ups as it can feel slightly isolating when you're not bumping into colleagues and getting those ad-hoc check-ins.
4:30 p.m. — After a few more meetings and an afternoon of paper reading, I head home. Listen to the new Leon Bridges album on the bus, £2.05. Film my Waffle Wednesday when I get home, this is something I saw on Instagram and started doing with my two besties when I moved to NZ and we have been LOVING it. It's such a great way to keep up with each other's lives, and share what's been going on and how you're feeling — can't recommend enough! I'll watch their videos tomorrow due to the 11 hour time difference.
5:30 p.m. — Feeling mentally drained and incapable of making meal decisions, but S steps in and does all the work, making broccoli and Quorn peanut butter noodles so I just have to do the washing up.
8 p.m. — Get into bed early with a cup of tea, biscuit and the Nintendo Switch. My friend recently recommended Spiritfarer as a cosy, easy game and I have been loving it! I didn't grow up playing games so my skills with the controls are not the best, but I really enjoy playing so games like this are perfect!
10:15 p.m. — Finish off the evening reading before lights out.
Total: £13.60
Day Four
6:50 a.m. — Fell back asleep after the 6 a.m. alarm. S brings through a cup of tea, which I drink while scrolling before hopping in the shower and commencing my normal office day routine.
8:05 a.m. — Bus to work, very glad it isn't raining today as the first bus was full and drove past us, £2.05.
8:40 a.m. — Get stuck into more policy paper edits and read some analysis a colleague sent overnight. I am 100% a morning person, so I try to capitalise on that by getting all my hard thinking done early and keep the easier tasks for the afternoon slump.
9:30 a.m. — Impromptu Teams call with some seniors about a workshop we have later today with another agency. We are writing a joint briefing with them and need to decide our position as an agency before the meeting and then hopefully we can convince them that our approach is the right one!
10:30 a.m. — All staff meeting interrupted by the arrival of press and ministers to my office for a media announcement. I agreed I'd support ferrying people around so leave the all-staff to help set up. Watch the press release from the back of the room.
12:45 p.m. — Press conference is all wrapped up and I am starving! Sadly I am too late to join the office waiata (māori song) practice that I usually join on a Thursday, so just heat up my second mac 'n' cheese leftover portion and scoff down my lunch.
4 p.m. — Final meeting of the day, really constructive workshop with the other agency with the outcomes we wanted.
5:20 p.m. — Workshop done and head downstairs to post-work drinks. We just meet in the break-out/kitchen area and bring our own drinks and nibbles. I bought a bottle last week and there's always more drinks than people so I just have a few glasses of fizz from the joint drinks pool.
6:30 p.m. — Leave the office and immediately get on the bus, feel very smug as last week I left the office and watched a bus drive past me, £2.05.
7 p.m. — S has made crispy fake chicken wraps, coleslaw and tater tots so I plate up and join him for a sofa dinner. He had to pick up some bits from the shops for this, £6.40 for my half. This is such an unusual week as I normally do the majority of the cooking, but I can't say I'm complaining.
8 p.m. — Load the dishwasher and wash the last bits. Do some of my paint by numbers to relax while S marks exams. I love doing creative things but find I'm often too tired to think of something I want to create so a detailed paint-by-numbers fills this void, quietens my overactive brain and prevents me from mindlessly scrolling.
9:45 p.m. — Flop into bed and fall asleep fairly quickly, I find office days are way more productive but take it out of me.
Total: £10.50
Day Five
7:30 a.m. — Put on my gym clothes in preparation for later, make some granola and eat while watching some YouTube videos.
8:45 a.m. — Crack open my laptop and get going for the day, emailing out reminders to people for a review panel I volunteer on.
10:15 — Take a mid-morning break to read the money diary from this week and snack on an Anzac biscuit and a feijoa — this is not intentional but is potentially the most kiwi snack I could have prepared! Feijoas are a super popular fruit in NZ that apparently aren't commonly eaten elsewhere. I had never heard of them before moving here and the jury is still out on whether I like the tangy pineapple/guava/strawberry flavour mash up.
12 p.m. — Head out to the gym on my lunch break, do 10 minutes on the stairmaster (nothing gets me sweating quite like it) and an ab workout. A man sees me doing a side plank and starts asking me about it and copying me, much to the amusement of his personal trainer. I feel slightly awkward as my side plank is terrible but it is a funny interaction and a reminder of how friendly Kiwis are.
1:15 p.m. — Home, shower and hair wash done and I whip up an elite freezer lunch of some frozen dumplings, a paratha and some of the tempura seaweed rolls with stir-fried glass noodles inside (the most elite of the frozen asian snack IYKYK), dipped in a soy sauce, crispy chilli oil and homemade vinegar sauce.
3 p.m. — Call with someone about the procurement I'm trying to do followed by an end-of-the-week quiz with the other advisors in my team. I don't know if it is a hangover from online COVID forced fun or something that went on prior, but people in my agency love an online quiz.
5 p.m. — S arrives home with his colleague/friend, A and the three of us walk round to a nearby brewery for beers and burgers with the rest of his department as a bit of a leaving do for a student teacher. We get three beers (they don't serve pints in NZ which S still hasn't gotten over) and a burger each, £31.
7 p.m. — All S's colleagues head off so we walk across the road to a different bar with 40(!!) beer taps. Get three more beers each and have a good natter before calling it a night, £18.
10:30 p.m. — Flop into bed and immediately fall asleep.
Total: £49
Day Six
5:30 a.m. — S struggles to sleep with a hangover so he gets up and goes through to the sofa to nap with the TV. I thankfully roll over and fall back asleep.
8 a.m. — Wake to S asking if I want a cup of tea, contemplate rolling over again but decide to join him on the sofa.
8:30 a.m. — Grumbling tummies demand bacon sandwiches and more tea, make those and eat, watching this week's Ta skmaster absolutely howling at everything Jason Manzoukis does.
11 a.m. — Drag S out of the house and to the gym for a hangover-curing workout. 10 minutes rowing them a leg workout and sweat all the beers out (that's how it works right!?).
12:30 p.m. — Showered and ready for our afternoon of activities, hop in the car to a birria taco place we have been wanting to try out since moving here. Order one of everything to share — two birria tacos, a quesadilla, birria ramen, chips and dip and two Cokes, only £15 for my half of the feast!
1:30 p.m. — Drive back home and grab my library book to return. Leave the car, walk to the library (support your local library guys!) then walk up to Eden Park and grab a drink in a pub near the ground. A beer for S and a marg for me, £7.50 for my half.
3:30 p.m. — S's colleague and family are also going to the rugby so meet us in the pub. Get another beer for S and a G&T for me, £5.60.
4:30 p.m. — Walk over to Eden Park to watch the rugby. Grab some chips (or hot chips as the Kiwis call them) and two cans, £6.80 for my half. RTD (ready to drink) cans are really popular here, I try a Canadian whisky and ginger beer and S gets a normal beer.
5:20 a.m. — Half time, S picks us up two cans of RTD alcoholic lemonade to try, £5.50 for mine.
6:30 p.m. — Game is finished, it was the first time we've been at a game the Auckland Blues won, so that was fun! Walk over to a pizza place and share two super delicious pizzas (a salami and nduja one, and a confit garlic, bacon and hot honey one) and some olives. I get a glass of red wine and S has a beer, £25.30 for my half.
7:45 p.m. — Roll home and watch an episode of the new series of Clarkson's Farm and the final two episodes of Friday Night Dinner with a cup of tea.
10:30 p.m. — Climb into bed feeling bloated and very sleepy. Two meals out was indulgent today and I'm feeling it. Healthy home-cooked meals all week next week!
Total: £65.70
Day Seven
7 a.m. — Wake up and can't get back to sleep so I sneak out and bring my phone back into bed while S snoozes. Decide to make a list of all the Booker Prize winners since I was born and challenge myself to tick them all off — luckily, I've ticked off eight already.
8:20 a.m. — S wakes, I bring in tea and we read until tummies start grumbling.
9 a.m. — Have porridge watching Gogglebox and make the meal and shopping lists for the week.
11 a.m. — Drive over to one of the climbing gyms we like, get petrol on the way, £44. We bought 10 climb punch passes last month so this climb is pre-paid. We gave bouldering a go after it was included in the Olympics and fell in love with it! I'm really not very good (I like to blame it on a two-year hiatus but it's likely just my lack of upper body strength or coordination lol). But the beauty of climbing is there are routes at all levels so you can complete climbs and feel a sense of achievement even at the beginner level!
1:15 p.m. — Arms and fingers are on fire and energy is gone so we call it a day. Stop in at the supermarket on the way home and brace myself for the world's most expensive food shop! Pick up apples, bananas, broccoli, herbs, panini bread, blue cheese, feta, milk, Greek yog, eggs, tinned chickpeas, beans and tomatoes, rice, cream, crisps, frozen blueberries, tortilla chips, puff pastry, chipotle sauce and dish sponges, £37.50 for my half. The crazy thing is this felt like a cheap shop! Not sure I'll ever get used to the price of groceries in NZ — get me back to Aldi!
2 p.m. — S makes panini's for a late lunch then showers and straight into joggers for a cosy afternoon.
3:30 p.m. — S cracks on with some work for school while I alternate between reading The Salt Pat h for book club, playing Spiritfarer and finishing the Wolf Hall BBC show.
6 p.m. — I make a paneer curry while we catch up with S's family on FaceTime. Sunday evening in NZ is the best time for catching up with friends and family in the UK so we normally have at least one call.
7:45 p.m. — Sit down to watch Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure. I've never seen this but I'm a big fan of Wayne's World so I'm sure it'll be a hit. Snack on popcorn and some Whittaker's chocolate (absolutely elite, already know I'll miss it when we leave).
Total: £81.50
The Breakdown
Conclusion
"Recording my spending was a fun exercise and really highlighted how much tea we drink! I'm not surprised in the slightest that food and drink was my most expensive category, but it is our favourite thing to do so that is unlikely to change any time soon. I doubt I'll keep up with recording my spending in this detail, but I do generally keep a close eye on our bank account so that's unlikely to change. I do need get better and remembering to transfer any leftover money into the ISA at the end of the month to make it work harder."
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That said, my parents also lent me a lot of money to go to grad school and more recently to redo my kitchen, even though in both instances I planned and expected to take out a real loan. At this point, I've had a good salary for a few years, plenty of savings and investments, and they are retired so I am my own safety net. In a pinch, my partner would help out but I have a long runway. Do you or have you ever received passive or inherited income? If yes, please explain. I received about $60,000 when my grandmother died. I withdrew enough for my down payment (I think it was $30,000 or so) and left the rest in my investment account, which has since grown to over $200,000 with only minor additional contributions. Day One: Monday 7:15 a.m. — My partner, R., was out of town for a week and then we both had busy weekends in opposite directions, so I cajole him into a little morning date at our local coffee shop (we live four blocks apart). I get a bagel and an English breakfast tea. I wanted to walk in the park, but he reveals he has a morning dentist appointment. Plans dashed. We sit and watch some people play ultimate Frisbee. No clue what the rules are, but I love that these people are having fun on a Monday morning. $8.50 9:30 a.m. — My foster cat, P., has been with me nearly two weeks, so I let him out of the bathroom and into the bedroom in the hopes that a little casual attention will help him come out of his shell. He hides under the dresser while I clock into work from home and resume work on a medium-crisis from last week. It's an exciting project, but there is a lot of head banging. 1 p.m. — Lunch time! I have some leftover salad that I'd made this weekend with lentils, an apple, radishes, pumpkin seeds, and lettuce. It's fine. My summer CSA just started so I'm trying to lean into fresh cooking. I lay on the bedroom floor and coax the cat out for some pets, but he goes back into hiding when I go back to work. 6 p.m. — I lay on the bedroom floor and read, while trying to convince my foster cat that I am a friend. I've had him less than two weeks and my back can't wait until he loosens up. I flick a wand toy at him and he looks at me skeptically. 'All the cats love this,' I promise. 7 p.m. — R. comes over! We crack open a bottle of wine and make a dish with zucchini, white beans, and pesto with basil that we grew. I'm so glad I found someone who likes to cook as much as I do. We have a lazy TV night until it's time to put P. back in his bathroom quarantine and go to bed. Daily Total: $8.50 Day Two: Tuesday 7:30 a.m. — I wake up and feed the cats, letting P, back into the bedroom. I scrounge around for breakfast and decide on a savory oatmeal. I simmer the oats with ginger and soy sauce, saute some cherry tomatoes, garlic scapes, kale, and turnip greens in sesame oil, and top it all with an egg and some chili crisp. So so good. I make the best tea (Harney & Sons, Paris) and settle back into bed for more reading until it's time for work. 3 p.m. — I was planning on eating after my standup at 1 p.m., but my boss adds me to a last-minute meeting that goes until 1:45 p.m. and then I have another 2 p.m. and my stomach is rumbling by the time I'm out. Much of my company is on the West Coast and, while I thankfully don't have a lot of meetings, the ones I do are often at lunchtime. I don't have time to cook, so I go to the nearest quick lunch place where I get a burger topped with avocado and fries. It is not that good relative to the price. $18.22 7 p.m. — It's our primary season so I go out and vote. I really can't take another election where the worst possible person wins. R. is busy tonight so I alternate between video games, cat socialization, and reading. The little guy strongly considers playtime and bats at the wand a little with his paw. He's still decompressing from being in a cage for a few weeks, poor thing. We also have a positive interaction with my other cat, A., where they eat Churus together. My eating schedule is out of whack because of my late lunch, so I don't get hungry until 10:30 p.m., at which point it's bedtime, so I don't eat anything. Daily Total: $18.22 Day Three: Wednesday 7:15 a.m. — Gym time! It's a deload week so my workout is pretty mild, which is great because I did not eat dinner. I grab an egg everything bagel with scallion cream cheese on the way home, per usual. I take a quick shower and then clock into work. $6.25 2 p.m. — Another day with too many lunchtime meetings. I open a new jar of miso that I started fermenting six months ago and it's weirdly wet. It tastes really good though and I don't see mold so YOLO. I start boiling water for pasta while heating up some butter with miso, zucchini, and scapes. The zucchini cooks down to a nice sauce that I thicken with nutritional yeast and, bam!, lunch time. I love working from home so much. 6 p.m. — I take another shower because we're officially in the two showers a day part of summer. R. comes by and we do some cat socialization together. We should eat dinner but I am unfortunately out of dish soap so all of my dishes are dirty from the last two days of cooking, and so we cannot cook for a third day. One day, I'll learn to adult. 8 p.m. — I haven't had nearly enough carbohydrates today, so we head out to a place that does fancy sit-down pizza that we haven't been to in a hot minute. I'm a bad influence so we split a half carafe of wine along with a panzanella salad, and a margherita pizza with artichokes. The wait staff ignores us toward the end so I go in to see about the bill and end up paying for it all as they want to ring me up inside. He'll buy me some future dinner, I'm sure. $73.16 9:30 p.m. — I stop at the grocery on the way home for dish soap, canola oil, and tomato paste, which is all I can fit in my little Fjällräven backpack. I am so excited about doing dishes. We put in my bedroom air conditioner in preparation for the heat wave and watch an episode of Taskmaster before bed. $15.01 Daily Total: $94.42 Day Four: Thursday 7 a.m. — Time to do the dishes! There are so many dishes! I clean the dishes and then I make them dirty again with another savory oatmeal bowl that's basically a repeat of Tuesday's breakfast. I read in bed again with my tea (oolong) again until it's time to go to work (from home). I let P. free in the apartment to see what happens. This isn't how you are supposed to introduce cats, but they were fine with snacking together. 10:15 a.m. — R. is baking bread as he's off work today, but remembered the gas in his apartment is still turned off due to a fire in the building earlier this year. He asks if he can bake it here. I turn on the oven for him even though it is 85 degrees out and we'll have to keep it on for like three hours. 12:45 p.m. — I'm in a meeting throughout most of the bread baking and emerge from my bedroom/office to find half a freshly baked loaf of bread on my counter. I drizzle it with olive oil and eat a whole lot of it. 3 p.m. — We hired a few people in Poland recently and I volunteered to go there to help with trainings. I was sorta kidding, but the powers that be liked the idea and my boss reiterates that might happen! I spend too long googling flights and things to do and music venues when I should be doing real work. 6:30 p.m. — R. comes back over with some extra ingredients for a turnip and tofu stir-fry and scallion pancakes. We paid about $1,000 split 75:25 for 25 weeks of vegetables, fruits, and eggs from a local farm. I pay more because the CSA predates him so I keep most of it and he's more likely to bring extra ingredients over. I love how the CSA forces me to eat a more diverse array of vegetables than I would otherwise. That said, turnips aren't that exciting and we poorly execute the tofu portion of the stir-fry. The scallion pancakes slap though. I absolutely love making them. 9 p.m. — Dinner and clean up take forever so we just do a little cat hang out when we're done. I leave P. free since he's still hiding and doesn't seem to be fighting with my resident. Daily Total: $0 Day Five: Friday 4:30 a.m. — I let P. sleep in the bedroom instead of putting him into his bathroom, and he wakes us up playing in the middle of the night. I'm glad he's out and about and having fun for once, but I wish he'd wait another two or three hours. I eventually fall back into a fitful sleep. 7:15 a.m. — Another gym day, another bagel. This bagel guy knows my order, which makes me feel like part of the community. I hop on the subway home ($2.90, which is always deducted from my prepaid card), shower, make tea, log into work, the usual. $6.25 12:40 p.m. — My boss seems to be feeling Friday too because he bumps our 1:1 up by 20 minutes and we run through it in five minutes flat. His Zoom background is different and I get the feeling he's playing hooky. I'm not super hungry but scrounge around for lunch and end up with the leftover scallion pancake and some bread with peanut butter. Back to coding! 4:45 p.m. — It's Friday alright. I clock out a little early and veg out on the internet until R. texts about dinner. He is excited about making a riff on a panzanella salad and I just like that he's planning dinner. 6:30 p.m. — R. comes over with tomatoes, the rest of his loaf, some chickpeas, and Korean rice beer. We each pop a can while the bread roasts and then another can while the bread and chickpeas marinate in the dressing and tomato juice. I am quite a bit tipsy as that was a lot on an empty stomach, but not so tipsy that we can't finish the Friday crossword. The salad comes together nicely and he does the dishes while I pet the cats. We watch the new Poker Face episode, which is probably the best of the season so far and only partly because it's set in NYC and relatable. 10:30 p.m. — I feed the cats Churus right next to each other again. A. can be hissy and mean to newcomers and my last foster wouldn't stop bothering her, but P. is a quiet shy guy, and all good vibes. I make a mental note to write his bio tomorrow so he can be listed for adoption. I let him roam free in the apartment again tonight and hope he sleeps the whole night through. Daily Total: $6.25 Day Six: Saturday 3:30 a.m. — I wake up to the sound of P. puking. Sigh. I clean it up and get back to bed where I fall asleep again basically immediately. 5:30 a.m. — I wake up to the sound of P. puking. R. rouses first and I pretend to be asleep so he'll deal with it. 7:15 a.m. — I wake up to A. cuddling me close. Much better. R. is missing and I go into the living room where he reports P. puked three more times, but did a lot of good play. I've been feeding P. miscellaneous food cans that A. rejected, but I will never feed him that variety again. He doesn't seem to be feeling ill otherwise so I just prepare breakfast for the two of them. He doesn't really touch it, poor thing. 8:30 a.m. — We're hungry and decide to check out a new café in the neighborhood. I get a very good iced tea and breakfast plate with eggs, toast, avocado, and salad that is not better than anything I could cook at home for a fraction of the price. We make our weekly resolution to make breakfast at home next week, but paying $20 for mediocre eggs is our toxic trait, so we'll probably fail once again when Saturday comes around. I do keep this place in mind for occasional coffee shop working as they have the best tea selection in the neighborhood and a lot of outlets. $22.26 10 a.m. — I go pick up my CSA share (prepaid) where I get scallions, dill, Swiss chard, radishes, lettuce, summer squash, snap peas, strawberries, and six eggs. I'm dreaming of a summer squash frittata with dill, but that's a story for another day, as today we're going to Porch Stomp. 10:45 a.m. — I meet my partner at the subway and we head into the city to catch the ferry over to Governor's Island. He buys us tickets online but no one bothers to check them. We wander between stages before sitting for a while at to catch some bluegrass and then a few people that sing about books. Helicopters keep flying by loudly and I wish they would be banned already. 1 p.m. — It's really hot and I'm in need of refreshments, so I buy us both paletas (mango chamoy for me, a weird choice of tahini cookie dough for him). At long last, two of our friends finally arrive (and another three bail...), so we meet up with them to watch more bluegrass, this time in jam form, and catch up. $13.20 3:45 p.m. — I'm quite hungry at this point so we head over to the Mexican place on the island with skyline views. I wish it were about 10-15 degrees cooler, but otherwise this is my perfect weekend day. I get a plate of nachos with chicken and a large Mezcal margarita that really hits the spot. The nachos turn out to be sharing-portion huge, but our friends aren't that hungry and two out of four of us are vegetarian or vegan, so I end up gobbling it all up myself. Only minor regrets. R. pays for our meal to cancel his dinner debt from earlier this week. We're all pretty exhausted and rush to make the 5 p.m. ferry home! 6 p.m. — R. and I separate to shower with the intention of reconvening. I get home where I take a long cool shower and sprawl out under the fans because the sun has left me totally beat. I am not a summer person and cannot wait until fall (it is only the summer solstice today). 7:30 p.m. — I feed my hungry little kitties and, thankfully, all seems well with P.'s tummy. R. and I decide not to bother meeting up again, but do virtually smash the Saturday NYT crossword. I watch the dumbest TV until I fall asleep early. Daily Total: $35.46 Day Seven: Sunday 6:45 a.m. — I'm up at my normal time with my snuggling cat. P. is not hiding, but laying on the couch. I get up to feed them. I laze around for a while before seeing if R. wants to come over for breakfast. He does! I make a pot of tea and I introduce him to savory oatmeal, this time with zucchini, kale, and eggs. We chill with the cats for a bit until he departs for his Sunday chores and I play video games until it's time for the gym. 11:20 a.m. — It's a quiet Sunday afternoon at the gym with only three other people. There's a newbie there who makes me remember how far I've come. I like it when women take up lifting so I hope she sticks with it! I'm always up for a post-gym treat, so I get a large oolong bubble tea with 25% sugar, 25% ice on the way home. Yum yum. I normally like to walk home through the park on Sundays, but it's still a humid swamp out there so I chicken out and jump on the subway. $8.49 2 p.m. — I take a luxurious, lukewarm (the weather, man), Epsom salt soak and read a very long chapter of The Vegetarian by Han Kang. It's my bath book so it's been almost two weeks since I read the first chapter, but I really like it. Then I give my parents a call and move on to Sunday chores. I vacuum everything, clean out the cat boxes, take down the trash, recycling (so much recycling with all the wet food the cats eat), and compost, and scrub out the bathtub. 4 p.m. — R. comes over with feta cheese to realize my dreams of this summer squash frittata, even though it's 94 degrees and requires turning on the oven again. He chops up summer squash while I dump all the dill and leftover cilantro into the food processor with some walnuts, olive oil, salt, and a little rice vinegar to make a tasty herb sauce. We saute the summer squash in the cast iron before mixing all the radish green, herb sauce, feta, and egg mixture. This comes out super good for something I've just improvised on the spot. 5:30 p.m. — We ate so early because we have tickets to a concert (I think I paid like $70 for the two) that is well over an hour from us, partly because the L train is off for the weekend. I'm sort of regretting committing to this on a Sunday night, but alas, we jump onto the subway to downtown Brooklyn and then get out and wait for a bus to cart us 45 minutes east. The assorted maps apps say there won't be a bus for another 20 minutes and I am so hot, but then it arrives out of nowhere two minutes later. Oh, blessed day. The a/c is pumping and I read a whole chapter of Invisible Women. 6:45 p.m. — The first opener has just started when we arrive (I don't know them and it's only adjacent to what I like). The show is outside and I am once again so unbelievably hot. I head down to the bar to get water and the bartender gives me two cups of ice and tries to point me to the water station. I cannot find it though so I head back to R., where we nibble ice chips for the rest of the set. 8:45 p.m. — I see people come out of a door with water and try another water quest, but it appears to be just a line to the bathroom. I give up and return to where we're standing. R. is a better man than me so he takes our cups and goes to successfully find the water. It is apparently through that door and next to the bathroom. Bless him. The sun finally sets, but it's still 86 degrees when the band I want to see takes the stage. They play an amazing set, but all I can think of is a cold shower by the time it's over. 10 p.m. — The various apps once again tell me the bus won't be there for 30 minutes. I look into a Lyft, but it's going to be $50 to get back to civilization, so we wait. And then once again the bus comes like two minutes later! The a/c is blasting and I read a whole chapter on anti-woman data bias in transportation planning, which, yes. We finally get home at like 11:30 p.m. and I take a cold shower and take an ashwagandha to wind myself down. Daily Total: $8.49 The Breakdown Conclusion 'I try to keep my spending under $350 a week, so this was a fairly inexpensive week, though a lot of it (the vegetables and the concert) were prepaid and I was probably marginally less social than normal. I had fallen out of cooking before the CSA started a few weeks prior, so it's a good reminder of how much I enjoy cooking and how much cheaper it is than eating out. 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14 hours ago
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Money Diary: A Criminal Psychologist On £41,039
Welcome to Money Diaries where we are tackling the ever-present taboo that is money. We're asking real people how they spend their hard-earned money during a seven-day period — and we're tracking every last penny. This week:"I'm a 39-year-old working in the civil service as a criminal psychologist. I've been with the Civil Service for coming up to a decade in a variety of roles before I landed in this field five years ago, which is very challenging and interesting work. I'm a Londoner, having grown up here and moving back roughly 10 years ago following a split from my daughter's father. I now live with my sister and daughter and our mother moved in with us two years ago following a decline in her health. It can be difficult sometimes, juggling everything when she has rough weeks and requires more care and we are deciding next steps in terms of long-term care, but overall, she's enjoying being back with her kids and grandchild. I'm a cautious spender on a day-to-day basis, but can then have a fuck-it day and book a holiday and value experiences over possessions." Occupation: Criminal Psychologist Industry: Civil Service Age: 39 Location: London Salary: £41,039 Paycheque Amount: £2,586 and £200-£300 overtime. Number of housemates: Three — P, S and T. Pronouns: She/her Monthly Expenses Housing costs: £1,200. We all put an equal amount, which covers utilities, rent and groceries. Loan payments: I have roughly £2,000 on a 0% balance card from a wedding and holiday that I pay off monthly. Savings: £10,000 in my emergency savings fund and £10,000 in a LISA. Pension? Yes I pay 6% and my employer pays 29%. I have roughly £20,000 in, plus £18,000 from some old jobs. Utilities: Included in joint payment. All other monthly payments: £79 for mine and S' phones and SIMs, £10 period charity, £11 Spotify, £20 union membership, £6 Oura. Did you participate in any form of higher education? If yes, how did you pay for it? I attended university later on, completing both my degrees as an adult. I have student loans from my bachelor's, with work paying for my master's degree. I don't really pay much attention to the debt as it comes out of my paycheque and only seems to cover the interest. I'm waiting for it to be wiped out after 30 years. Growing up, what kind of conversations did you have about money I grew up in a single-parent household. Mum was a stay-at-home mum who took care of me and my siblings and we survived on benefits. We didn't go without, but we never went on holiday or had many discussions around money. I learnt not to ask for what we couldn't afford. If you have, when did you move out of your parents/guardians house? I left home at 17. At what age did you become financially responsible for yourself? Does anyone else cover any aspects of your financial life? I became financially responsible for myself when I left home at 17 and have been working ever since. I've never had anyone cover aspects of my financial life and am very conscious to maintain my financial security. What was your first job and why did you get it? I worked as a server/bartender whilst hitchhiking around Europe with friends when I left home. It covered enough for us to get to the next country and have fun. Do you worry about money now? Yes. I worked hard to get to where I am and don't have a security net in terms of family to fall back on. I check my accounts daily and make sure that I'm saving and looking for deals/swaps to reduce costs where I can. Do you or have you ever received passive or inherited income? No. Day One 7:50 a.m. — Wake up. Turn on the laptop to see the damage since I've been off, only 300 emails for the last week. Call it a win. 8:20 a.m. — Say bye to S on her way to school. I'm lucky that she's older now and can walk to school herself. The school run was never my vibe. 9:30 a.m. — Log on to my first meeting of the day with a collagen coffee and a green smoothie. 12:30 p.m. — Second meeting with tofu tacos and salad for brunch. There's a bunch of changes happening at work and my days had a bunch of meetings slotted in whilst I was off so I feel like I'm playing catch up. 3:30 p.m. — S comes home and has a catch-up with me about her day. 4 p.m. — Another meeting. This is all London, so cameras off. Use this time to do my makeup for tonight and make a pasta sauce for dinner and lunch tomorrow. Have an early dinner myself. 6 p.m. — Remind Mum to make the pasta for the sauce and give S a hug before I head out. She's deep in homework and humming to Spotify. Grab a MOTH cocktail from the fridge (they do a great margarita) for the train into central. Train ticket, £14.90. 7 p.m. — Arrive at the theatre to see Jonathan Bailey in Richard II. It's a new theatre I've never been to before, it is quite small and immersive so I'm hoping that he's as good in person as he is on screen. An American tourist and her son are sat next to me, she says she saw him in Bridgerton and is very excited. 8:45 p.m. — Intermission. Pick up a glass of wine £9.85, that's London prices for you. 10:30 p.m. — The play was great, the son ended up sleeping on his backpack next to me during the whole second half, slightly snoring. Head to the station to get home. 11:30 p.m. — Home. Do skincare, currently on a retinol journey with The Ordinary. So far it's working. Add that and B5 cream, then bed. Day Two 7:30 a.m. — Alarm goes. In the office today. Put my makeup on while chatting to S. Walk to the bus stop with her, hop on whilst she continues to school, £1.75. 9 a.m. — Arrive at work, make a coffee with our machine. I'm trying to drink less coffee, so I try to treat myself only when in the office (it's working for 60% of the week). Breakfast of eggs, chicken sausages and protein yoghurt (just found a dairy-free one that's great). 9:30 a.m. — Log on to a meeting. 11 a.m. — First client of the day. They are new. I am getting a feel for their communication style and completing initial assessment. 3 p.m. — Multiple clients later, I have lunch of yesterday's pasta at my desk while completing some tasks. 4 p.m. — I'm training some new staff. Have a debrief with P before a client comes in. Assess the progress and some areas the client may be struggling with. P is leading the session, so give him some pointers as it's his first time. 5 p.m. — Quick debrief with P on how it went and give advice for him as he's going to plan the next session for me to review later. 5:30 p.m. — More clients. 7 p.m. — Pack up and get the bus home, £1.75. 8 p.m. — T is home today and has cooked a stir fry for dinner. Eat whilst catching up with the family and Gogglebox. 10 p.m. — Skincare and bedtime. Total: £3.50 Day Three 7:20 a.m. — Wake up before alarm. Same routine as yesterday, but pack a cuter top for later as I'm going to a friend's book launch tonight. Walk with S to the bus stop and school, £1.75. 9 a.m. — Same breakfast as yesterday. Usually have the same thing when I'm back to back in the office, makes it easier otherwise, I can forget to eat when it's busy. 10 a.m. — Area meeting with our interventions board, which I'm a panel member of. 12 p.m. — Client comes in, in a state of distress. 4 p.m. — Spent four hours with client contacting the relevant agencies to get them support. Ends up with the emergency response team coming to pick them up and taking them to the hospital. First time I've had to deal with something that intense. My director heard about what happened and takes me aside to say how well I handled it and suggests I go home early to decompress. 4:30 p.m. — Pack up. T is home, so call her and make sure she's okay cooking dinner. Decide to go to my friend's book launch instead of going home as I need a distraction from today and promised her I would show up this evening. Text S on the way so she knows I'll be home late. She asks if she can go over to a friend's for dinner. Works out well as T only has to sort Mum out. Train ticket, £14.90. 6:30 p.m. — Arrive a little early and have a chat with V and meet her lovely publisher. V has some pre-launch nerves, but she's a great speaker. Grab a glass of wine as the event is catered and grab a seat in the front so I can sneakily take some pics whilst she's on stage. 8:30 p.m. — V was amazing as always. It's so nice to see your friends do well and be able to celebrate their wins. Have some food and more wine, mingle a little whilst V does the rounds of meeting the publishers and press. 9 p.m. — V and a couple of close friends head on over to the pub for a catch-up now the networking is done. V buys us a round and we catch up on life. 10 p.m. — About to leave, but M buys me a drink for the road, so I stay a little longer. They're cute and I don't mind flirting a little. 11:15 p.m. — Leave the bar and head to the train station. 12:30 a.m. —- Home, skincare, electrolytes. Change my alarm as I'm WFH tomorrow and future me might need some extra sleep. Total: £16.65 Day Four 8:20 a.m. — Wake up and say bye to S who's on her way to school. Turn on the laptop whilst I make a matcha and some painkillers. No meetings today so I put on a skincare mask that I was influenced to buy. You're supposed to sleep in them but I find that I can wear it for a couple of hours and does the same thing. 9 a.m. — Call and check in on client from yesterday. They've volunteered to be admitted to the mental health ward for 28 days. I think it's for the best as they have been struggling and this will give them the time to have a break, reset and see what their options are. It's a shame that support services are so limited with all the funding cuts that it had to come to them being in distress to get the help they needed. 10 a.m. — Quick breakfast of eggs, spinach and potatoes. It was meant to be a Spanish omelette but turned out more of a scrambled mess, tastes great though. 10:30 a.m. — Update my director about yesterday. They've been very supportive and ask if I want the day off but I'd rather make sure it's all sorted. Spend the next hour or two filling out the paperwork for it all. 1 p.m. — Decide to go drop off my Vinted parcels at the locker to have a break and get out of the house. Enjoy selling on Vinted as I can build up a kitty on there and having a teenager it helps with her style options as she's into vintage atm. Though I find it hard to call early 2000s vintage. 2 p.m. — Have some reports due and case files to look at ahead of next weeks monthly review. Spend the rest of the afternoon working on these. 5 p.m. — Make a prawn risotto for dinner whilst keeping one eye on the laptop as a colleague left out vital information on some of the reports. If it comes in this evening I'll be fine, otherwise I'm going to have to chase it up. I'm working on being better at delegating work but it's times like these that I am tempted to do it all myself. 6 p.m. — Have dinner with S, talk about what we want to do for summer break. It's just the two of us and I like to do something fun once a year. I'm thinking of a quad biking, she's thinking beaches. We look at different countries we haven't been to and make a list based on climate and where we haven't been and then I'm left with the homework of checking deals and prices. Even though I'm doing okay financially, I still don't like paying full price if I can find a good deal. 7:30 p.m. — S helps with the dishes and then heads over to her room to finish up a school project that's due. Check the emails, no luck as apparently they forgot. Decide to just do it myself. I know I should be a better manager with things, but it's important and I need to make sure it's ready for Monday. Contact all the relevant people as some of the information can take a couple days to come through. Hoping my good relationships with the other departments means it'll come through for me to complete tomorrow and not have to work over the weekend. 10 p.m. — Say goodnight to S have an everything shower, LED mask whilst watching Netflix and then bed. Total: £0 Day Five 8 a.m. — Wake up, laptop on. Say bye to S on her way out. Makeup on as I'm going into work later. 9 a.m. — Coffee, greens and meeting. 10 a.m. — Staff check in. We do this twice a week as the team is hybrid it's not mandatory but after this week it's nice to connect. 10:30 a.m. — Porridge for breakfast with a load of seeds. 11 a.m. — Session with my mentor. We've been working with her for a couple months as I'm part of a women's scheme at work that helps women in all stages of their careers. The idea is that you mentor those in an earlier stage of their career than you are. I really like my mentor, we have a lot in common and she's helping me with some future planning. It also helps me think about my practice and how I can support my mentee who is quite new in her career. 12:30 p.m. — Take the bus into work, £1.75. 1:30 p.m. — Catch up with colleagues whilst I make a coffee and a smoothie. K is getting married in a couple of months and has been going through all the details with us. 2 p.m. — Client session goes well, we had a bit of a breakthrough. I'm slowly moving away from being client facing but today's session was a nice reminder of how therapeutic work can make a difference. 3:30 p.m. — Another client session, this one was way tougher, not all wins. 5 p.m. — Finish up some session logs that are due and give my colleague H a recommendation for my nail lady. It's a new place I found locally they have good prices and are very zen. Tempted to gate-keep as I hate loud and stressful places but H is one of my favourite colleagues. 6 p.m. — Bus home, £1.75. 7:30 p.m. — Steak, homemade wedges and roasted veggies for dinner. 8 p.m. — S is going to a party tonight and likes to use my vanity to get ready. She fills me in with all gossip about her friends. 8:30 p.m. — S is new to going out and whilst she has a curfew I don't like to head to bed until she's home. Shes always fine, I'm just a worried parent which I try not to project on her. I am getting better as I used to check Find My Phone every five mins when she first started. I decide to finish up some work with some skincare. M from the other night texts and distracts me a little. 11 p.m. — S calls and asks if she can stay a little longer as her friends are and they can all take the bus home together. She sounds like she's having fun so I say yes. 11:40 p.m. — S is home had a great time. She's been putting herself out there and expanding her friendship circle and I'm proud of her. Both head to sleep. Total: £3.50 Day Six 9 a.m. — Wake up, skincare then full English breakfast with S. 10:30 a.m. — Leave the house to head into central. S and I are looking at unis today. Pick up some Blank Street coffees for the train as S wants to try them out. Nothing amazing but I don't put extras in like S does, £10.65. 12 p.m. — Arrive at the open day and the uni is gorgeous. I'm trying not to have an opinion and let her get a feel for things as S says I can get over excited by things. I think it comes for being able to give her things I didn't have, but it looks pretty cool and I'm having fun. 2 p.m. — Checking out the halls. The first one was alright but the second one was amazing. The girl who showed us around is definitely an S type of person and I could see her face light up and try to be cool when she saw the second halls. Money wise this will be a later-on convo that I'll have to figure out. I'd love to have S home if she goes to uni in London, but I can see that she wants to start her independent life. 4 p.m. — Head to the food hall and pick up some sushi and teas and chat about the visit, £22.75. She's a lot more excited about the uni than I thought she'd be. I'm not mad if she stays in London but we have several more to visit over the coming months which are all across the country. 5:30 p.m. — Decide we can't be bothered to cook. Call Mum and ask what she wants, then pop into the Waitrose to get bits for dinner. Vegan pizza for me and S (we are dairy free) and they do the best ones that still taste like pizza. Get a bottle of wine, salad, vegan desert for S and regular pizza for my Mum, £35. 7 p.m. — M texts me on the train home asking if I'm out tonight. I'm not in the mood to do a late one and I'm also trying to be more mindful with my dating. I'm liking the chat but did first meet them whilst having a couple drinks in the evening so I suggest a drink tomorrow afternoon to which they're up for and suggest a place (I like someone who plans). 8 p.m. — Home for dinner. Check in on Mum as T was working today. She's a little worn out from the week so I bring her dinner and put her laundry on. 9 p.m. — S and I play some Switch together and then settle on a movie, we are going through classic 90s/00s. Tonight we've gone for 10 Things I Hate About You. Put it on whilst we do our skincare together. 12 a.m. — Movie was a win and still holds up. Head to bed. Total: £68.40 Day Seven 9:30 a.m. — Wake up and the trains come out from yesterday, £22.35. 10 a.m. — Put some laundry on. Have some matcha and an everything shower. 11 a.m. — S emerges from her room. Make her breakfast as she's got some homework due and wants a chill day to herself. We are similar in that way when we have had a lot going on, we like to spend some time chilling on our own. 11:30 a.m. — Put a stew in the slow cooker and get ready for my... should I call it a date? Debate on whether to wear makeup. I'm on a lowering makeup "journey" (I hate that word). Had a lot of body issues growing up in the 90s/00s and have been moving to just dyeing eyebrows and eyelashes and working on skincare. Decide to do some. 1 p.m. — Give S a hug before leaving and head to meet M, £14.90 for the train. 2:20 p.m. — Get there a little early walk around a bit because I don't want to be the first person there. 2:30 p.m. — Arrive and spot M it's a cute brunchy type place and we order bits to share. M was out last night so has a Bloody Mary and I start with a Mimosa. 6 p.m. — Times really flown and I've had more fun than I thought I would. We both have work in the morning, so make the responsible decision to head home. M insists on paying again, it's something I'm getting used to. I reluctantly say yes and they walk me to the station. Have a pretty good kiss and say bye. 8 p.m. — Home. Make some bits to take to work tomorrow check in on S and Mum before calling it an early night. 9:30 p.m. — M's texted which is sweet. I'm newly single after a long relationship which didn't end well so I'm probably more cautious but today's been nice. Do an LED mask and skincare and watch some Supacell on Netflix which I'm really enjoying. Total: £37.25 The Breakdown Conclusion "I'd say financially it's an average week. I tend to try to save and have no spend days during the week. But I will have big spends, like when we decide on our holiday, or S's school supply run. The date was unexpected and if we see each other again, I'd pay. It's been nice to log everything this week. I do worry about money a lot and seeing my spend this week, most was on ensuring S was having a good experience visiting universities and that's where I value spending money — experiences." If you would like to submit a diary, please use our new form here. If you would rather email us, please send a bit of information about you and your financial situation to moneydiary@ We pay £100 for each published diary. Prior to submitting your Money Diary, please read and consider Refinery29's Terms of Use and Privacy Policy for UK and Ireland. 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2 days ago
- Refinery29
A Week In Washington, DC On A $247,760 Joint Income
Welcome to Money Diaries where we are tackling the ever-present taboo that is money. We're asking real people how they spend their hard-earned money during a seven-day period — and we're tracking every last dollar. Today: a manager who has a $247,760 joint income and who spends some of her money this week on a Saved by the Bell margarita. Occupation: Manager Industry: Public policy Age: 39 Location: Washington, DC Salary: $132,860 Joint Income/Financial Setup: My husband D.'s gross salary is $114,900. Our combined income is $247,760 (before any deductions). We combine almost everything in joint checking and savings accounts. We each take $125 per pay period for our own spending money. We've had our finances combined since we got married. Assets: Checking: $14,000; savings accounts: $27,000; CD: $4,500; investments - $19,000; retirement (me): $330,000; retirement (D.): $485,000; house: $177,000; car: $18,000. Debt: House: $297,876; car: $3,000. Paycheck Amount: Me: $3,267.62 (twice a month); D.: $1,650.45 (weekly). Pronouns: She/her Monthly Expenses Housing Costs: Mortgage: $1,436.19; condo association fees: $1,733.57 (this includes all utilities, parking, taxes, laundry, 24-hour concierge, landscaping, all maintenance, reserve fund, and gym access). We know the amount is quite high, but after owning a house for a few years and absolutely hating the responsibility and upkeep, we decided we are willing to spend more on an association fee and just have everything taken care of for us. Loan Payments: Car: $251.49 Private School: $2,800 (for our son, F., who is 6). The annual tuition and fees are $48,000. We qualify for financial aid, which brings our total down to $25,000. I had a lot of feelings about sending my child to private school (I did public for my K12 education), but I've gotten to the point where I know it was the right decision for F. now and down the road. Insurance: $231.65 (condo, auto, personal articles, umbrella). Peloton: $41.34 Internet: $82 Cell Phones: $166.03 (for me and D.; this also includes Apple TV+). Streaming Services: $40 (Spotify, Netflix, Hulu, Max, Paramount, Peacock, Disney+). Fidelity: $500 (This is D.'s retirement contribution, since his current job does not have a separate retirement plan). Dependent HSA: $208.33 per paycheck. We use this to pay for most of summer camp each year, which costs between $6,000 and $7,000 each year. 401(k) Contribution: $332.16 per paycheck. Health Insurance: $269.37 per paycheck for health, dental, and vision. This covers all of us. Pet Insurance: $20 Was there an expectation for you to attend higher education? Did you participate in any form of higher education? If yes, how did you pay for it? My parents, and really my entire family, absolutely expected me to go to college. Starting when I was in the 7th grade, my grandparents would buy me hard copies of the US News and World Report College Rankings. I would spend hours pouring over the information. I decided to go to a small, private liberal arts school and graduated with a degree in political science. College (tuition, room and board, some spending money) was completely paid for by my parents and grandparents, and I was so incredibly lucky to graduate without any debt. I was thankful at the time, but did not truly understand how much that would impact my finances in the future. Now that I am approaching 40, I know it was one of the greatest gifts they could have given me. Growing up, what kind of conversations did you have about money? Did your parent(s) educate you about finances? My parents discussed money with me regularly when I was growing up and the conversations continue today. I think the fact that I am an only child has a lot to do with this. When you're an only child, you are often seen as simply a shorter adult in your family. I knew roughly how much my parents made, how they were investing their money, and how they were budgeting. Now that I am older, I am so thankful for those open lines of communication surrounding finances. I know my parents are financially stable as they continue to age. I know where the money is located, and approximately how much is available. What was your first job and why did you get it? I started babysitting when I was 13, which, now that I have a child of my own, seems absolutely bananas. When I was a senior in high school, I started working at a local ice cream shop. They let me come back summer after my freshman year of college, too, which was so nice of them. In college, I worked at a local restaurant for three years (during the school year and summers). It was a great job that gave me spending money and allowed me to pay my sorority dues. Did you worry about money growing up? When I was going into the 6th grade my mom switched careers and took a huge pay cut. I remember being very aware of this and hearing so many conversations about changes we would need to make. In the end, it all worked out and her salary grew tremendously as her career grew. But those first few years were tense. Do you worry about money now? Sometimes yes, sometimes no. Most of my concerns are big picture: Are we being strategic enough with our money (I don't think we are), are we saving enough for the future, are we being frivolous? Things like that. At what age did you become financially responsible for yourself and do you have a financial safety net? I've provided additional details below, but honestly, I'm almost 40 and I cannot truly claim to be financially independent. My family is our safety net and it gives me such peace of mind. Do you or have you ever received passive or inherited income? If yes, please explain. Yes. When my husband D. and I bought our first house, my parents fronted us my inheritance from my grandfather, approximately $70,000, and then paid themselves back when he passed away a year and a half later. We put this towards our down payment. When we sold that house and bought our condo, they gifted us another $10,000 to put towards our next down payment. When we bought our car in 2020, my parents gifted us $10,000 to put towards it. Each year, my parents gift us $8000 specifically for our son F.'s school tuition. This is all separate from birthday and holiday checks, which total about $3,000. When D. and I got married, my parents paid for our wedding (~$25,000) and his family paid for the rehearsal and other 'traditional' expenses that the groom's family takes on (~$5,000). When my parents pass away (hopefully a very, very long time from now), D. and I will become millionaires through inheritance. Day One: Friday 6 a.m. — My husband D. and I are snuggling in bed when our son, F. (6 years old), calls out for us. We're all up now! I make breakfast for F. (toast with peanut butter, apple slices, and yogurt) and make a protein coffee for myself. I'm on Wegovy and can finally stomach coffee again after upping my dosage a few weeks ago. We all sit down while F. eats, and we play a few NYT word games together. F.'s favorites are Wordle and Strands, so we start with those. 7:30 a.m. — While F. gets dressed for school, I fill his water bottle and make sure he has what he needs for Field Day. We watch a few minutes of Wild Kratts then D. drops F. at school (D. comes home after). Once they leave, I get to work on straightening up the condo. Our cleaning lady came yesterday, but there is always something to wipe down or put away. With my ADHD diagnosis, I have embraced the motto of 'an object in motion stays in motion'. If I sit down, I'm doomed. Once I've cleaned up the condo, I take an Everything Shower, do my skincare, and put on cozy lounge clothes. 9 a.m. — I turn on my computer, check email, make sure things are quiet with work, and then throw in a few loads of laundry. I may be in the minority, but I love communal laundry. The laundry room is right next to our unit and the price is included in our monthly condo fees, so it's all just very easy. I love being able to do multiple loads at once. I spend a few minutes texting with a friend who is a teacher at my F.'s school and we discuss the best workbooks to do over the summer. 10:30 a.m. — I finished three loads of laundry while keeping an eye on work. I am in a very quiet season right now, which I am loving. My husband drops me off at the dermatologist for my annual skin cancer check, and then he heads to the eye doctor. My appointment goes well and I get the all-clear. I pay a $40 copay when I leave. My husband needs new glasses, so he spends $525 on the exam and new lenses. $565 11:45 a.m. — When I leave my appointment, I walk over to Bluestone Lane and get the Tropical Fresh Smoothie ($13.69 with tip). After I grab my smoothie, I call an Uber and go home ($15.20 with tip). When I get home, I check my email and respond to a Teams message. I call my mom and talk to her for 45 minutes. My parents live a few states away and it is becoming increasingly difficult to be a member of the 'sandwich generation'. I just really miss them, and as an only child, I worry about them. $28.89 1 p.m. — D. gets home from his appointment; he stopped at Trader Joe's to get a few TJ-specific groceries we needed, including roasted garlic and pesto pizza, silver dollar pancakes, orange chicken, and peanut butter crackers ($82.48). I put the groceries away and make myself an open-faced chicken salad sandwich with the fancy bread we bought at Patty O's in Little Washington last weekend. $82.48 2:30 p.m. — I've been rotting (i.e. doom scrolling) and need to pull myself out of it. I review a document for a colleague and provide feedback. Next, I order a prescription cream that my dermatologist recommended earlier today. I review my personal to-do list and decide to finally clean the kitchen ceiling light. We had work done in our condo weeks ago and it's been super dusty ever since. Once the light is clean, I clean up the rest of the kitchen and put things away. $10 3 p.m. — I call our local toy and bookstore to ask if they have the workbooks I am looking for in stock. I am trying to be a more thoughtful consumer but also must balance real life. They don't have them, so I go to Amazon and order three workbooks, laundry detergent, and scotch tape. No one tells you before you have kids how much tape they will go through — it's ridiculous (I don't even know where it all goes, he just likes taping everything together! It's weird, but also something I hear from a lot of other parents). I move on to folding all the laundry I did earlier. Luckily it is all towels and sheets and not a million socks. $75.86 3:30 p.m. — While putting away the sheets and towels I take a few minutes to reorganize our linen closet and restock a few things we keep in there. Next, I finish my tablescape (fresh flowers, candlesticks, lemons, and greenery), do a little work, and shut my laptop. 4:30 p.m. — I throw in two more loads of laundry and then get changed and go to the UPS store before picking up F. at school. I need to return two shirts to Old Navy since the sizing was way off. While I am out, I stop and get a lemonade, too. It takes forever for my son to be dismissed, so I clean out the car while I am waiting. $4.68 6 p.m. — We FaceTime with my MIL while F. is having dinner. They chat about his school day and compare answers on the various NYT word games. When F. is done with dinner, he watches a Lego show with D. while I make a black pepper simple syrup for cocktails we are making later this evening. I go through F.'s bookbag quickly to make sure there's nothing I need to read or sign. Once I'm done, I join F. and D. and watch a show with them. 7 p.m. — We read books and do F.'s bedtime routine. Then, while D. does bedtime, I cut up strawberries for our cocktails and preheat the oven for the garlic and pesto pizza. Once F. is asleep, D. makes cocktails and I open our box from Thrive Market, which is mostly snacks and one box of a sourdough pasta I want to try. Tomorrow is my weekend morning to wake up early with F, so I set out an art project for us to do together. 8 p.m. — D. and I sit on the covered balcony and have dinner. It's starting to storm, so it's perfect. We stay out there for a while just talking and hanging out. We come back inside, clean up the kitchen, and watch an episode of The Night Agent on Netflix. While we're watching television, I give myself a manicure. 9:40 p.m. — D. takes the dog out for his final walk. (Side note: I might not mention every dogwalk here, but I promise he is living his best life with us. Since at least one of us works from home everyday, we don't have to pay for a dog walker or anything. He spends his days going outside every few hours and sleeping in F.'s bed while D. works at the desk next to him.) I start getting ready for bed. I do my skincare (Biodance Collagen Gel Toner Pads, COSRX Snail Mucin Serum, Innisfree Green Tea Caffeine Bright Eye Serum, Natrium Bio-Lipid lotion). Once I am in bed, I journal for a few minutes, just jotting down the small, good moments of the day before turning out the light and going to sleep. Daily Total: $766.91 Day Two: Saturday 5:45 a.m. — I wake up and check the time. F. will be up soon, so I scroll for a few minutes and listen for him. At 6 a.m. he wakes up and we start our day. 6:15 a.m. — I make breakfast for F. (mini pancakes, apple slices, yogurt smoothie) and myself (toaster waffle with peanut butter and a protein coffee). We discuss our plans for rock painting and play a few NYT word games. Once we're done eating, we start our craft project. Another thing no one tells you before having kids is that you'll be doing art projects before 7 a.m. After our rocks are painted, F. asks if we can put together treat bags for his classmates and give them out on the last day of school. I'm a sucker, so we spend a few minutes on Amazon picking out the bags and a few things to go inside (summer-themed tattoos and bubble wands). $55.09 8 a.m. — D. wakes up and we start getting ready for a day of soccer games. I pack our bag with snacks, sunscreen, bug spray, jerseys, cleats, and a soccer ball. Once that's done, I quickly fold a load of laundry that I did last night and then get myself dressed (black linen pants from Old Navy, a pink linen tank from Athleta, and gold sandals). We leave a little earlier than we need to so we can stop for coffee (me) and croissants (D. and F.). $15.51 10 a.m. — We get to the soccer game and find other parents to chat with. Making parent friends is so tricky: The kids and parents need to get along, the parents need to have a similar parenting philosophy, and you all have to find and make time to hang out. It's important to me to build these relationships, so I'm happy to make the effort, but it's a lot. We watch the game and then the kids play on the playground next to the field. 12:30 p.m. — The second soccer game of the day was canceled due to impending storms, so we decide to trek out to the suburbs to have lunch at Chili's. The margarita of the month is Saved by the Bell /'90s themed and I really want to try one. It's the last day of the month, so it's now or never (it was totally worth it for the nostalgia. The drink itself was fine, but I wouldn't go out of my way for a Chili's margarita on a regular basis). We order lunch and take our time, since it has now started pouring rain. It's not our usual type of restaurant, but those chicken crispers hit the spot. $75.36 5 p.m. — We get home and just hang out for a while. While D. and F. play Mouse Trap, I snuggle with the dog and then take a quick shower. Eventually it's time for D. to take the dog to meet a potential dog sitter for a trip we have planned later this summer. I stay home with F., make him dinner and record a quick video of him to send to my MIL, then we watch a Savannah Bananas game. The team comes to DC each summer, but tickets are crazy expensive so streaming a game on Disney+ is as close as we are going to get. 7 p.m. — D. and the dog are home just in time for D. to do bedtime, which is F.'s preference. While they do bedtime, I finish the two loads of laundry that I started earlier, put folded laundry away, and do a general pick-up of the condo. Since we ate a larger than usual lunch, I skip making dinner. If D. is hungry, he'll make a sandwich for himself. 8 p.m. — We sit down to watch Fountain of Youth on Apple TV+. I love movies about treasure hunting and heists. We make it through most of the movie before I call it a night around 9 p.m. I do my skincare routine, journal, and go to sleep. Daily Total: $145.96 Day Three: Sunday 6 a.m. — F. wakes up and comes looking for D. Sunday is my morning to sleep in, so D. gets up and I fall back asleep. 7:30 a.m. — Now I'm up. I walk out to the living room and find D. and F. playing Connect 4. They tell me they saved me a piece of French toast, so I go find that in the kitchen. We spend the next hour getting ready and packing up the things we want to bring to the winery later. 8:30 a.m. — We're out the door and on our way to F.'s tennis lesson. We stop for coffee and a breakfast sandwich (me), iced tea (D.), and a croissant (F.). We get to tennis lessons and D. and I (and the dog!) find a bench and spend the next hour just hanging out with each other. We gotta sneak those dates in where we can. $21.84 10 a.m. — Tennis is over, so we head to Wegmans to pick up snacks for the winery. D. and F. go in to pick out snacks and I stay in the car with the dog. They choose an assortment of chips, crackers, and dips. $43.52 11:30 a.m. — We're not meeting up with our friends until noon, so we stop at Red Truck Bakery for a few treats. Their baked goods are delicious, but they are located about an hour outside of DC, so we try to stop whenever we are out that way. $24.62 6 p.m. — We get home from the winery, give F. a bath and get him ready for bed. Once he's in bed, I take a quick shower and then refill my water cup with icy water. I decide I'll deal with unpacking from the winery tomorrow. 7:15 p.m. — After F. is asleep, D. and I sit down to finish watching Fountain of Youth. Afterwards, we discuss logistics for the upcoming week. It's F.'s last week of school and we leave for vacation next Saturday so there are just a lot of moving pieces. I do my skincare, journal, and go to bed around 9 p.m. Day Four: Monday 4:30 a.m. — I wake up not feeling great. I did my Wegovy shot last night, and it usually makes me feel kind of nauseous. I can't fall back to sleep, so I scroll for a bit. 6 a.m. — F. wakes up, so now we are all up. I make F. breakfast and myself a protein coffee. We play Wordle and chat. 7 a.m. — I'm still not feeling great, so I go back to bed. D. gets F. dressed and they leave for school. 9 a.m. — I wake up for the second time and I'm feeling much better. I get up, make toast, and log in to work. Everything is quiet, so I read a few work-related newsletters that I subscribe to and check my email. My mom calls and we chat for a few minutes about our weekends. 10:30 a.m. — I have my first meeting of the day with our contracting department. Nothing too exciting is discussed and I walk away with zero action items. As soon as that meeting ends, my manager calls and we chat about a variety of things for a while. After both calls I have 10 minutes until my next meeting, so I set a timer and do a few things around the condo. 12 p.m. — My second meeting is over, so I spend some time drafting summaries of our work over the last few months. I send them to my manager for her review and ask a few other people to send their write-ups to me for inclusion in the final document. I get pulled into a Teams conversation regarding an upcoming webinar, so I share the relevant information I have. When I am done, I turn on My Big Fat Greek Wedding and do a few personal tasks (folding two loads of laundry, putting all of my clean laundry away, and cleaning out my dresser). 1 p.m. — I have a meeting in 30 minutes, so until then I spend some time checking in on my direct reports to ask if they need anything and then get started on making a packing list for our upcoming trip. 2 p.m. — Meeting with my stakeholder is over and I am done with meetings for the day. I throw some chicken in the air fryer for lunch, buy a new deodorant that my dermatologist recommended (Vanicream anti-perspirant/deodorant), finally unpack our delivery from Thrive that I opened on Friday (which leads to restocking and organizing our snack basket), organize a few things I need D. to take with him when he goes out this afternoon, and keep working on my outfit planning/packing list for vacation. $11.25 4 p.m. — Work is still so quiet. D. leaves to get a haircut ($35 with tip — must be nice to be a guy!) and pick up F. from school. I clean up my personal email, review summer reading and math work for F., file a claim with our vision insurance for D.'s appointment last week, and take a shower. 5 p.m. — I make dinner for F. and we all sit down to talk about our days and play NYT word games. After he eats we take the dog out for a long walk and I throw in two loads of laundry. 7 p.m. — F. is asleep. I make birria grilled cheeses for me and D. and we watch an episode of The Night Agent. Afterwards, I put together goodie bags for F.'s classmates, since their end-of-year party is tomorrow. When they're done, I pack them up along with a few other things that need to go with F. to school tomorrow. 9 p.m. — I'm in bed with my ice water. Daily Total: $11.25 Day Five: Tuesday 5:45 a.m. — F. wakes up. He's super excited to see the goodie bags for his friends and he can't wait to hand them out. D. makes him breakfast and we all sit down to play NYT word games. 6:30 a.m. — I fold the laundry that was done yesterday and then start getting myself ready. I pull my hair back, do skincare, steam my dress, and gather my accessories. 7:30 a.m. — I pack my bag, gather the stuff I packed up last night, and F. and I head out. D. usually does school drop-off, but it makes sense for me to drive today. Once we get to school, I park and walk in with F. and our stuff. I run into a few other class parents and take their stuff too, since I have my handy Versa-Cart. I make my rounds, dropping stuff off where needed. I say bye to F. and his friends and walk back to the car. I decide I want a coffee for my drive to the office, so I grab an iced latte with an extra shot and a breakfast sandwich ($11.54). While I drive to the office, I call my mom and we chat. Once I get to my office's garage, I pay the parking attendant ($19) and then go to my assigned spot for the day (normally I take the bus/Metro, which is about $5 per day). $30.54 9:30 a.m. — After catching up with a colleague on a few things going on, I finally make it to my desk. I clean up emails that came in overnight/this morning, edit a document my manager reviewed and send the information to the next person in line, and chat with one of my direct reports about their upcoming time out of office. 12 p.m. — I'm done with meetings for the day and hungry. I walk to get lunch ($21.32) and stop at Sephora on my way back to the office. They finally have the Biodance Collagen Toner Pads that I have been looking for so I grab those and The INKEY List Glycolic Acid body stick, which has been all over my FYP (update: It's okay, but you have to be okay with a slightly sticky feeling on your skin. I only use it at night, so it can sink in while I'm sleeping and then remove any residue in the morning). I redeem some of my points for a $10 discount, so my total comes to $36.04. $57.36 1:30 p.m. — I eat lunch at my desk while I register F. for two fall soccer leagues ($289.32 total for both) and summer tennis lessons ($230). Once registration is complete, I add the game and practice dates to my calendar for all sports. Next, I submit a claim to our health insurance for F.'s speech therapy. The total claim for last month is $825, but we pay each week, so no actual charge today. $519.32 3 p.m. — I send out a few emails to stakeholders and then pack up to leave. I need to get home by 4 p.m. so I can pick up D. at the house and then F. from school. I get home around 3:45 p.m., get changed into running shorts and a T-shirt, and we leave to get F. Once we pick him up, we drive to the burbs for soccer practice. 5 p.m. — We get to soccer practice and F. joins his team while D. and I stand on the sidelines with friends and chat. 6:30 p.m. — We're home from soccer and go immediately into F.'s bedtime routine (bath, pajamas, story). Once he's asleep, I make chicken sandwiches for me and D. and we watch the first episode of Conan O'Brien Must Go. 9 p.m. — I get into bed and have a feeling it's not going to be a great night of sleep (spoiler alert: I was right). Daily Total: $607.22 Day Six: Wednesday 2:30 a.m. — I wake up and try to fall back asleep for an hour before giving up and allowing myself to scroll for a bit. I finally drift off to sleep around 4 a.m. 6 a.m. — We're all up for the day. F. has breakfast and afterwards he wants to do a few of the math worksheets that are part of his school's summer work. Once he's done, we watch a show, and get ready for his last day of school. 8 a.m. — D. takes F. to his last day of school and I make myself breakfast and log on to my work computer. I clean up emails and make sure my calendar is blocked for the day. 11 a.m. — I take a quick shower, get ready, and go over to F.'s school for closing day activities. Once the celebration is over, F. and I leave and go get lunch, as well as a sandwich to bring home to D. While we are at lunch, we run into a few friends from school, so the kids run around with ice cream cones for a while. $62.34 1:30 p.m. — F. and I are finally home. I log back in to work and see that I won an award for a project I recently completed. It comes with a gift card, so I buy a navy-blue body suit, a bathing suit, a set of summer pajamas, a workout tank, and a set of rechargeable battery-operated lightbulbs for two antique lamps. Afterwards, I update a few documents that I am responsible for maintaining, check in with my grand boss regarding a call he has next week that I won't be around for, and work on personnel-related documents. 3 p.m. — Since D. was able to work all morning, his afternoon is free. He and F. play with monster trucks and then F. and I go outside to play catch. I wear my over-the-head bug net (the mosquitoes and nats are so annoying in DC) and feel ridiculous, but it works so well. It's really nice being on the cusp of 40 and not caring at all about what people may think of my ridiculous head gear. 5 p.m. — Tonight's soccer practice is canceled, so we all watch Inside Out on our balcony while F. has dinner. Once it's over, it's time to move on to our bedtime routine. 7 p.m. — F. is asleep. Neither of us are particularly hungry since we both had a larger-than-usual lunch, so I skip making dinner. D. does some work, and we watch another episode of The Night Agent. We decide that D. will get up with F. tomorrow morning and I will do Friday morning. I put out a wooden car building and painting set for them to do in the morning. 9 p.m. — Skincare, journal, bed. Daily Total: $62.34 Day Seven: Thursday 6 a.m. — First day of summer vacation and F. is up. D. gets up with him and I go back to sleep. 8 a.m. — I'm up now. D. and I discuss our meeting schedules for the day so we can ensure coverage for each other. D. and F. run to the grocery store to get a few things we need until we leave town on Saturday and I get ready for the day. $42.35 9:30 a.m. — D. and F. get home. F. gets changed into the outfit I have laid out (it's the same outfit he wore for the first day of Kindergarten) and we go outside to take 'last day of school' pictures. I bought a cute sign from Etsy a few weeks ago, so he holds that, and we get some really good photos. I take a few in the same place I took baby pictures in 2020, and all the feelings come rushing back. 12 p.m. — F. has been playing while D. and I have a few meetings, but things are quiet now. F. and I drive to a pie shop in Arlington that I've been wanting to check out. I have been craving key lime pie for a few weeks, so this is my chance. I get a slice of that, D. gets a slice of coconut, and F. gets the 'lunch lady bar' with oats, peanut butter, and chocolate frosting. Everything is incredible! We will definitely be back. $21.57 1 p.m. — While I was out, my boss messaged me asking to chat about a few work things, so I let her know I am back in front of my computer. We chat for about 90 minutes regarding various work issues. 3 p.m. — F. and I work on a new Lego set for most of the afternoon. We thought it would be a good activity for the two days in between school ending and leaving for vacation, but he's done in about two hours. Oh well! 7 p.m. — F. is asleep and I am making chicken sandwiches (again!) for dinner. We didn't do a big grocery shopping trip this week since we're going out of town, and now we are scraping together meals. 9 p.m. — Skincare, journal, bed. Daily Total: $63.92 The Breakdown Conclusion 'Seeing all of the 'little treats' compiled in one place makes me realize they're not so much treats as regular everyday occurrences. We really need to scale back in that area. We haven't updated our budget in a long time, and this is inspiring me to do so. Since writing this diary, D. and I have both received raises. My raise was a little less than 5% and D.'s was approximately 13%. In terms of dollars, both raises together will add about $1,000 per month (net) to our income. We have a date scheduled for later this month to finally sit down and re-do our budget.' Money Diaries are meant to reflect an individual's experience and do not necessarily reflect Refinery29's point of view. Refinery29 in no way encourages illegal activity or harmful behavior. The first step to getting your financial life in order is tracking what you spend — to try on your own, check out our guide to managing your money every day. For more Money Diaries, click here. We've updated our Money Diaries submission process: You can now submit your Money Diary via our online form or by sending us a bit of information about you and your financial situation to moneydiary@ We pay $150 for each published diary. Apologies but we're not able to reply to every email. Prior to submitting your Money Diary, please read and consider Refinery29's Terms of Use and Privacy Policy. 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