What Is Soft Influence? The Most Impactful Employees Aren't Always Loud

Forbes

2 days ago

What Is Soft Influence? The Most Impactful Employees Aren't Always Loud
There's a reason Susan Cain's book Quiet did so well. Over four million people bought her book because introverts felt heard, some for the first time. That message stood out to me because my own experience had often been shaped by the opposite kind of energy. Having worked many decades in sales, I worked around a lot of extroverts. They can be boisterous, and most of them were a lot of fun. However, outside of sales, sometimes the most impactful employees aren't always the loudest. They don't necessarily have to be an introvert either. I've met plenty of extroverts who know the value of a pause and a well-placed question. The impact of that leads to calm, precise, and more meaningful results than people often realize. That result is soft influence. And it's becoming one of the most important forms of leadership at work.
What Is Soft Influence And How Does It Work?
What Is Soft Influence And How Does It Work?
Soft influence is when someone quietly moves things forward in a way that doesn't demand attention. They help people make better decisions, keep projects on track, and offer insights that get others thinking differently. They often have a great sense of timing and know how to ask the one question that simplifies something everyone else was over-complicating. Sometimes their best work happens during the meeting, and sometimes it happens in a hallway conversation afterward. Either way, they make things clearer, calmer, and more productive.
In my experience, I've found that people with soft influence are usually very tuned in to the emotions and energy of others. They tend to listen before they speak, and when they do speak, others pay attention because they're not just filling air. They build trust because they're steady, thoughtful, and not trying to take credit or win points. They just want to make the outcome better.
What makes this kind of influence so effective is that it's based on trust and respect rather than title or authority. Someone might not be in charge of the meeting, but when they offer a perspective, people stop and listen. Their coworkers notice it, and whether they realize it or not, their managers often rely on it to get the real work done.
Why Soft Influence Isn't Always Easy To Recognize
Why Soft Influence Isn't Always Easy To Recognize
In a lot of organizations, the people who get the most recognition are the ones who speak up first. That works for some, but there's a different kind of power in being the person who holds a team together by asking the right questions and making space for better thinking. You won't always find these individuals leading a big project or standing at a podium. Sometimes they're the ones quietly advising others, helping someone feel more confident, or stopping a problem before it even starts.
It's important to point out that not everyone who leads this way is trying to climb a ladder. Some are perfectly happy where they are. They're not looking for attention, and they're not trying to become the next department head. They just want to do their job well and help others succeed along the way. Some lead this way because they believe in servant leadership. They'd rather lift others up than wield power over them. They don't need the credit. Seeing the team succeed is the reward.
Others focus on being the person others turn to when something needs to be done right. They enjoy being the go-to for advice, clarity, or a second opinion. That doesn't always mean they want to lead a team or be in charge of strategy. For them, influence is about making a difference in the day-to-day. They're reliable, insightful, and respected. Leadership, in their case, doesn't have to come with a title.
I teach a lot of courses where I hear from students who tell me they don't want to be the kind of leader who has to be the center of attention or the one giving orders. Especially among younger generations, there's a real shift happening. Many are more interested in being respected for their knowledge than admired for their authority. They want to contribute meaningfully without constantly being on display.
Why Soft Influence Matters More Than Ever
Why Soft Influence Matters More Than Ever
Think of the workplaces where everyone wants to make noise. Maybe there's always someone sharing, announcing, or reacting to something. But the person who speaks less and thinks more often brings something to the table that others didn't even realize was missing.
Soft influencers are good at cutting through all of that noise. They help people refocus on what really matters. They prevent things from going off the rails. They're often the person you didn't realize was holding the team together until they take a day off and suddenly everything feels harder, and sometimes falls apart.
They often serve as mediators and help defuse tension before it escalates. They encourage people to slow down and consider different angles. That kind of influence builds strong cultures. It creates space for people to speak up, take risks, and collaborate more honestly.
When people ask me how to build a culture of curiosity when leadership resists change, I often point to soft influencers. They can have the biggest impact because soft influence doesn't come with a lot of flash and rarely draws resistance. It works quietly, behind the scenes, making teams stronger without forcing people to compete for attention. It holds a different kind of power, one that builds trust and stability, especially when the environment becomes uncertain.
How Leaders Can Support And Recognize Soft Influence
How Leaders Can Support And Recognize Soft Influence
If you're in a leadership role, it's worth paying attention to more than who speaks the most. Ask yourself who others go to when they're unsure or overwhelmed. Who keeps projects grounded without needing constant direction? Who asks thoughtful questions that keep things moving in the right direction? These are your soft influencers.
You can support them by making sure your feedback and recognition systems actually capture what they contribute. Don't just reward the most visible person in the room. Look at who makes others better, who quietly resolves problems, and who creates a sense of calm when things feel chaotic.
Give people space to lead in ways that fit who they are. Not everyone wants to stand at the front of the room, and there's no need to push them there. Let them lead through consistency, insight, and how they treat others. You don't have to force someone into a role they never asked for to acknowledge the impact they're making.
And talk about soft influence openly. When you give feedback or recognize someone's contribution, be specific. Mention how someone's input helped shift a conversation. Call out how they helped resolve an issue before it got worse. People want to be seen for the things that matter, even if they don't ask for attention.
Why Soft Influence Is A Kind Of Leadership That Deserves More Attention
Why Soft Influence Is A Kind Of Leadership That Deserves More Attention
Leadership doesn't have to come with a title or a spotlight. Some people don't want either, and that choice doesn't lessen their value. The people who lead with soft influence are often the ones others rely on most. They build trust, help teams stay grounded, and keep things moving forward without making it about themselves. Their influence holds things together, even if it's not always visible. If you lead this way, your contribution matters. And if someone around you does, let them know. A lot of teams succeed because of people who make everything work better without ever asking for credit.