
Remix brings bright cocktail flavor to low-calorie mocktails... but where are the bubbles?
Welcome back to FTW's Beverage of the Week series. Here, we mostly chronicle and review beers, but happily expand that scope to any beverage that pairs well with sports. Yes, even cookie dough whiskey.
I'm a little skeptical about fauxtails. After all, Recess left me thoroughly unimpressed and, well, if I want a well made non-alcoholic drink there are plenty of craft sodas that can scratch that itch without trying to trick my brain into believing there's booze around. By trying to recreate the presence of bourbon or vodka or whatever, too many of these un-spirited cocktails wind up just tasting entirely too complicated and at least sorta gross.
Remix could buck that trend. It's a low calorie mixer meant to stand up on its own or work as the backdrop in a simple, two-step cocktail. It's not trying to recreate the flavor of alcohol without the alcohol, which is a common sense play that should make everything better.
Let's see if it does.
Mischievous Mule: B-
It pours lighter than expected, but with the unmistakable sharpness of ginger and lime. It's also minimally carbonated. There's a quick fizz on the pour, but little in terms of sparkling water about 15 seconds after it settles.
The first sip starts out like a light ginger beer, then quickly gets inundated with mint. That's a bit of a surprise, even if it's written right on the label. It leaves you halfway between a mule and a mojito, which isn't bad but is a slightly weird place to be.
The lack of carbonation keeps it from reaching its potential. A fresh Moscow mule has bite. Its ginger spice, lime acidity and a steady torrent of bubbles clear each sip crisply. Remix doesn't offer that, instead letting each gulp linger, leaving behind an aftertaste that slows your drinking pace. It's possible that's a canning issue, but per the printing on the bottom of the aluminum I'm still about three months prior to the "best by" date.
That's kind of a bummer. I like what Remix was going for here and the flavor is better than any of the other pointed NA cocktails I've had in the past. But I can't shake the idea this could have easily been better.
Muddled Berry Mojito: B
We're back to the mint well, but this time in a place I'd expect it. The berry, not as much. But blackberry is a wonderful ingredient that's too often overlooked in modern cocktails. Anyone who's taken a pull from a pint of blackberry brandy on a cold day knows exactly what I mean.
Again, this pours with muted carbonation that gives off the impression the can's gone flat. It smells... busy. The acid and the mint are a bit jumbled and the overall vibe is stale passion fruit. So we're not starting out great.
Fortunately, the taste is significantly better. You've got three flavors intertwined to make a braid. There's sweet blackberry, tart lime and the mint, uh, mint. It's more complex than the mule and while the mint overpowers the end of each sip it's still enjoyable. But, like last time, the limited carbonation means we're lacking the bubbles to finish crisp. That fruit-mint lingers on your tongue like children's toothpaste.
So we're stuck wondering what could have been. This is a nice, low calorie, flavorful craft mocktail. But it's just missing one key element.
Perfect Paloma: B
This one pours pretty much devoid of carbonation. The smell off the top is all grapefruit, which is a lot to get through. But it's also a very pretty pink, so...
True to form, you're getting a still version of grapefruit soda. That makes this an easy pairing for vodka or tequila. It's tart and sweet and the flavor is full-bodied, if not entirely authentic. The lime is subtle, offering little resistance to that bulldozer of pink citrus.
As is becoming standard, some carbonation would help. But as is it's a solid enough low calorie mixer -- possibly the best suited for booze of the bunch.
Tres Citrus Margarita: B+
This one sounds awesome -- lemon, lime and orange together with a little salt. There's gonna have to be a precarious balance here to make it all work but the ceiling is high.
It pours completely still. Instead of minor bubbles there are none. It smells like lime first and foremost -- that makes sense, since it's a margarita -- but you do pick up some of the other citrus flavors as well. It's got a bit of a "cleaning supplies" vibe, which is not a bad thing but is where my mind went.
There's a real "flat Sprite" taste that comes off the first sip. It's chased by a little bit of orange. On its own it's a little thicker than a soda but not quite at juice levels.
There's a lot of flavor for a 20 calorie drink, but it does feel like it's missing a key ingredient. Adding a little tequila helps snap off each sip with some boozy burn that had previously been missing.
Would I drink it instead of a Hamm's?
This a pass/fail mechanism where I compare whatever I'm drinking to my baseline cheap beer. That's the standby from the land of sky-blue waters, Hamm's. So the question to answer is: on a typical day, would I drink Remix over a cold can of Hamm's?
There's potential here. The mixes are vibrant and low calorie. But the lack of carbonation is an issue. That's a simple fix, but for now I'm sticking with Hamm's.

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