SiR on his upcoming Hollywood Bowl show, his mother's passing and making a classic record

Los Angeles Times

2 days ago

In a TikTok video captured by a fan at one of SiR's sold-out L.A. shows last August, the Inglewood-born singer-songwriter breaks down into tears after his wife appears onstage behind him.
'Y'all give it up for my beautiful wife, Kelly Ann,' he says on the mic after collecting himself. When he leans to give her a kiss, the crowd erupts into a sea of 'aws' and cheers.
It was a tender moment between the couple during the final stretch of his Life Is Good tour in support of 'Heavy' — his most vulnerable project yet, which took five years to make and tackles his years-long battle with drug addiction, depression, infidelity and the process of getting sober. Behind the scenes, though, SiR was grappling with a different hardship: The death of his mother, Jackie Gouché, a talented performer who sang with Michael Jackson and Stevie Wonder, and helped build SiR's confidence as an artist.
His team was 'ready for me to just drop everything and come home,' says SiR over Zoom. 'But I prayed about it. I talked to my family, and we made the decision for me to finish the tour out, in honor of her.'
So by the time he got to the Hollywood Palladium, where he performed back-to-back shows, he says, 'I think I was drained and I needed my support, and my wife just so happened to be there, which was just perfect for me. I'll never forget that night.'
Since that emotional performance, SiR, born Sir Darryl Farris, released an extended version of 'Heavy,' subtitled 'The Light,' in April, which features six new tracks, some of which are new, such as 'Sin Again' and 'No Good,' and others that didn't make the cut on the original project.
The Grammy-nominated singer, who is signed to L.A. powerhouse label Top Dawg Entertainment alongside R&B darling SZA, is set to make his headlining debut at the Hollywood Bowl on July 20 for the KCRW Festival. The upcoming show will feature an opening set from singer-songwriter Leon Thomas, of whom SiR is a 'huge fan,' along with two surprise appearances from, he says, the 'best guests I could get.'
Ahead of the upcoming show, we caught up with the 'John Redcorn' singer to discuss how he's keeping his late mother's memory alive through his music, how becoming a father of two daughters has affected him both personally and artistically and his goal to make a classic record that everyone knows.
This interview has been lightly edited for length and clarity.
You recently wrapped up your Step Into the Light tour a few weeks ago. How was it being onstage with your older brother, Davion, who sang background vocals, and your uncle Andrew, who is a gospel bass legend?
It was so fulfilling. I've worked with them before on so many different levels. My uncle plays on all my songs, and Davion and I write songs together, but to have them on the road with me was just a different outer-body experience. I think my favorite part of all of that was the time we spent [together] before and after the shows, like having dinners with my uncle and finding out things about my parents that I didn't know. Finding out stories about my grandfather that I'd never heard. Now, our bond is that much stronger. It's really nice to have him on the road. My uncle Andrew is awesome. I got sick of my brother. [laughs]
You were also on tour last year in support of 'Heavy,' which is your most vulnerable project yet. How was it performing these songs this time around as opposed to last year? Did any songs hit differently?
We changed the set list just a tad because we had new music that we wanted to promote. The newer songs felt great. I was really specific about which ones I added because I wanted them to be songs that I enjoyed singing. The songs that I have in the set list that are staples still hit the same, and the audience still responds the same way. But it was surprising to see people singing the new music. I was fully prepared to go there and have to explain myself through these songs, but people were already vibing and singing along, which was great. My audience is great. I love my fans so much.
What songs did you add from the 'Heavy Deluxe: The Light' project?
We added 'No Good,' 'Sin Again,' 'Out of My Hands' and then, of course, 'Step Into the Light,' which we added to the end of the set. But we also have songs like 'John Redcorn' in there, which is a staple. If I don't sing 'John Redcorn,' people will come for my neck.
Last August, a fan posted a video of you crying during one of your shows at the Hollywood Palladium after you saw your wife, and the comment section was filled with sweet and supportive messages. Do you mind sharing what headspace you were in that night and why you felt so emotional in that moment?
That was the end of the tour, so I knew I was done, and in the middle of that tour, I actually lost my mom. At the time, I was on the phone with [TDE Chief Executive Anthony 'Top' Tiffith], and he asked me if I wanted to continue. They were ready for me to just drop everything and come home. But I prayed about it, I talked to my family, and we made the decision for me to finish the tour out, in honor of her. My energy was just so low. I've never felt like that and had to go perform, and we had like eight more shows left. So by the time I got to the Palladium, I was drained. There's a song that I sing called 'Tryin' My Hardest,' and I wrote that when I wasn't sober and I was just trying to work myself through recovery. It was an ode to my mother and my wife, just telling them that I wasn't giving up every time I relapsed. I [think] it was that song that she came out to. Half the time, tears were flowing down my face. So I think I was drained and I needed my support, and my wife just so happened to be there, which was just perfect for me. I'll never forget that night. We sold out the Palladium twice.
You had a really close relationship with your mother, Jackie Gouche, who was a phenomenal artist in her own right. Have you written any songs in dedication to her since her passing?
I have a song that goes: (Starts singing lyrics)
Her name is Danielle, born in December but never felt the cold Chocolate skin and a heart that's made of goldA certain resemblance to someone that I know As bitter, as sweet As easy as it was to sweep me off my feet I never imagined that you may never meet I wish you could be here to watch my baby grow She's gonna to do well Her name is Danielle.
It's just a song about my daughter that I wrote for her, and hopefully, I put it on the next project. Ooh. But we'll see. My mother was such a big reason why I started really writing songs and wanting to be SiR. I was a different kind of guy growing up. I was very timid. I wasn't sure about my musical abilities or gifts, and anytime I sent her songs, she would just light up and tell me how beautiful it was and give me advice, which was very important. After a while, I just kept impressing her and kept blowing her away in her own words. She was a huge part of my confidence.
You've been vocal and vulnerable about your experience of dealing with addiction and all of the lifestyle changes you've made since becoming sober. Can you talk about what you've learned about yourself throughout this time?
I've learned that I have an addictive personality, no matter what the drug is, and I've created some good habits. The gym is now the biggest addiction that I have. I definitely had to just learn who I was looking at in the mirror, because when you're inebriated, intoxicated all the time, you don't really know what's going on or who you are, and it's a tough place to be. It's a tough hole to dig yourself out of, but once you get out of that, you've got to navigate not falling back into the hole. It took about a year before I even got close to being sober. I'd have, like, sober weeks, and relapse after relapse and things like that. But at this point, I'm proud of where I am as a father, as a husband, and I'm trying to make sure that I just keep nourishing my artistry, because as much as I'm glad that that album came out, it took me five years to put that album out, and that shouldn't happen. I always like to think of myself as a hyper-creative, and I should be able to have an album out every year. I'm a studio rat, so we should be able to find it. But my sobriety had to be at the forefront of everything, and I'm navigating being SiR sober. This is all new, and it's definitely fun, but I definitely had to really work to get here.
Since releasing 'Heavy,' you had another daughter, whom you talked about earlier, so now you're a father of two. Can you talk about how fatherhood has affected you personally and creatively?
Fatherhood is like, ooh man, it's a process. It taught me a lot about myself. I'm selfish. I'm impatient. I'm getting old. [laughs] My body doesn't move and respond the same. When you have a 3-year-old who's running as fast as she can and you're trying to keep up with her, it's tough. But it also just taught me a lot about how well I was raised. My parents were sweet. They were so nice and so kind and so gentle with us, and very protective, but in the best ways. If I'm half as good of a parent to my kids as my mother was to me, I think they're going to be fine.
On Sunday, you are going to headline the Hollywood Bowl for the first time. How are you feeling about the show and what are you most excited about?
I can't lie, I was excited about Leon Thomas' set, but I realize now that I'm not going to be able to watch it, because I'm going to be doing my vocal warmups and getting ready for own thing. So now I'm just excited to see that sea of people. In L.A., I've done some really good shows, but it's a 17,000-cap venue, and I think we're doing good on ticket sales. This is the largest SiR audience that I've ever seen, so I'm excited to see the fans and hear them sing along.
Have you met Leon Thomas before?
We haven't met, but I'm a huge fan. I don't know if a lot of people [know], but Leon Thomas was a songwriter before he started putting music out on his own. Of course, everyone knows him from his acting days, but he was a part of a writing group that is based in L.A. and has been writing songs for other artists, so to see him come to the forefront of his own artistry is a beautiful thing. I think I'm on the waiting list for a Leon Thomas session. Collaborating is big right now with me, especially since things have changed and I don't work as much as I used to on my own. I want to bounce ideas off of good artists, and I want to have great musicians in the room so we can make sure that everything is where it's supposed to be in the song. We talked about it. I texted him [last] week just to thank him for being a part of this, and I wanted to congratulate him on all of his success. He's a good guy, and I'm definitely a huge fan.
Why is collaboration so important for you now? What's changed?
I want better songs. I've been around a long time. I got a lot of music out, but I have this thing in my head where I just want a classic. I feel like I have some really good records, but I want a song that everybody knows. As a songwriter, I think the most beautiful music comes from collaboration because you have people there to give you guidance in your own thought process. Even if I'm leading the way, I have somebody in my ear that's navigating into this place we're trying to get to. But I definitely just want to write better songs, and I'm not afraid to ask for help. I've had to learn that the hard way. I spent a lot of time over the years just kind of closed off in my box, which was great because it created my world, my sound. But now that I have established my sound, I should always be open to people helping me create in my world, especially if they know what my world is.
Have you started thinking about your next project yet?
I am definitely thinking about my next project. It does not have a name. We don't have a date, but I am as busy as I can be right now, just with new songwriting and trying to stay ahead of it, because if I make you guys wait another five years for another project, I don't think I'ma survive. I might have to go get me a day job. So I'm definitely working, but I'm not gonna rush. I'm not gonna force anything. I'm not just gonna put out anything. We need, you know, at least 40 to 45 minutes of just greatness, and I'm gonna do everything I can to deliver for the fans, because they deserve it more than anything.