Elton John's heartbreaking admission as he reveals he wants to 'die a natural death'

Daily Mirror

24-04-2025

Elton John has made no secret of his addiction battle, and the devastating impact drugs had on his life - but it was during his darkest days that he made a heartbreaking admission
Singer Elton John has candidly confessed his desire to "die a natural death" following his harrowing struggle with addiction. The iconic Crocodile Rock singer battled addictions to "drugs, alcohol, food and sex" during his bleakest periods.
In 1990, he took the brave step of seeking help, checking into a treatment facility. In his revealing 2019 autobiography Me, Sir Elton, now aged 78, recounted the poignant letter he wrote to cocaine while undergoing treatment at the Lutheran Hospital in Park Ridge, Illinois. He wrote: "You have been my w***e. You have kept me from any sort of spirituality and you have kept me from finding out who I really am."
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His words continued with a firm rejection of his past life: "I don't want you and I to share the same grave. I want to die a natural death when I go, at peace with myself. I want to live the rest of my life being honest and facing the consequences rather than hiding behind my celebrity status."
He reflected on his long-term relationship with the drug, saying: "I feel as though, after sixteen years with you, I was dead anyway.", reports the Express.
At that time, Elton was romantically involved with Hugh Williams. The couple met in the eighties and together spiralled into drug abuse.
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However, a turning point came when Hugh decided to quit their destructive lifestyle and entered rehab, which eventually inspired Elton to follow suit.
Yet, making such a life-altering choice wasn't straightforward for Elton, as he disclosed to the Daily Mail: "I went ballistic, screaming, shouting, saying the most hurtful things I could think of. Afterwards, I holed up alone in a rented house in London for two weeks, snorting cocaine and drinking whisky."
Elton eventually came to the realisation that he required assistance and, though the initial days in rehab were "tough", he managed to pick up some basic life skills like operating a washing machine and tidying up his own room—tasks he hadn't done for decades due to having staff to do them.
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After a six-week stint in a treatment facility, Elton now has a strong aversion to being around anyone under the influence of drugs. He confessed: "I just leave – because, quite frankly, it's a drug that makes people act like a*******s. I wish I'd realised that 45 years ago."
Elton recently opened up about a series of health challenges that sparked concern among fans around the world. It left him contemplating his own mortality. The music icon appeared on The Graham Norton Show in February alongside singer-songwriter Brandi Carlile to promote their track, Who Believes In Angels?
Elton used the time to speak about how the songwriting process for another project unexpectedly hit home, forcing him to think about his future. He admitted that when he worked on a song called When This Whole World Is Done With Me, written by longtime collaborator Bernie Taupin, he was overcome with emotion.
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He said: "I get to the chorus, and I find that it's about my death, my demise. And as a 76 year old man, which I was at that time, and having children and having a husband, mortality, and you think about, 'How long have I got? How long? I hope I've got, much longer than maybe I've got.'
"And so by the time I got to the chorus and suddenly realised that I started singing it (and) I lost it for 45 minutes. It was a very, very heavy moment for me. After 45 minutes of being consoled, I was okay, but I recorded the next day... when you're singing about being washed out to sea and the end of your life, it took me by surprise."