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RTÉ News
7 days ago
- Entertainment
- RTÉ News
Journalist and editor Barry McIlheney remembered in Belfast
The former editor of Smash Hits and Empire magazines Barry McIlheney was a leader who was also "joyously rock 'n' roll and punk rock", a memorial service has heard. The service at St Mark's Church in Dundela, Belfast, allowed former friends and colleagues to gather and celebrate the life of the journalist, broadcaster, and publisher, who also launched Heat magazine. Barry McIlheney, originally from Belfast, died in May at the age of 65. Among those paying tribute at the service was presenter Mike Edgar, who said Barry McIlheney had been a "very special man". He said: "Barry had an unstoppable passion for music, and everyone you could think of in the world of music had respect for him, and rightly so. "Without Barry, I would never have encountered the crazy worlds of Vince Power or The Pogues. "They all loved him." He added: "Barry was a true journalist, someone who exuded confidence at the right time and never missed a good opportunity if it presented itself. "On one occasion, he was live on the radio with me doing a report from a phone box on Carnaby Street in London and as ever feeding in the 10 pence pieces and entertaining us royally. "Whilst chatting live on-air, Barry looks out the phone box window and spots Depeche Mode walking down Carnaby Street. "As quick as anything, Baz kicks the door of the phone box open and shouts: 'Hey lads, come and talk to the good people of Northern Ireland on the radio!' - which, unbelievably, they dutifully did. "There then followed a Guinness Book of Records-style moment with three members of Depeche Mode and Barry stuffed into a phone box for what turned into a great moment of showbiz madness "Only Barry McIlheney would have the brass neck to carry off same!" Mike Edgar said Barry McIlheney, despite his success, had always remained passionate about Belfast. He said: "Like his contemporaries David Hepworth, Mark Ellen, or Niall Stokes, Barry might have worn a suit on occasion, but no one could ever call him 'a suit'! "Barry was a leader, but he was also joyously rock 'n' roll and punk rock." He added: "He was well read, brave in his work, always curious, never boring, always kind and always impressive. "Barry was larger than life. He always greeted us with a smile on his face, wearing his big coat with an upturned collar, a cheeky glint in his eye, a smart one-liner up his sleeve, and a well-earned loveable Belfast swagger." Delivering the homily at the service, Archbishop of Armagh Rev John McDowell, said: "The good that Barry did will not be interred with his bones but will live on in your memories forever." He added: "Barry never forgot where he came from, but he didn't talk nonsense about it either. "It wasn't everything and it wasn't nothing."
Irish Independent
01-08-2025
- Entertainment
- Irish Independent
‘I remember Bono warning me not to touch cocaine – but it was too late': Anthony Kavanagh on addiction, Stephen Gately and hiding his sexuality
It was the late 90s, by which point the Manchester-born singer had released two albums and enjoyed a run of chart singles, including the top 10 hit, I Can Make You Feel Good. 'I don't know how I ended up in there, but I somehow did,' Kavanagh says. 'I thought I was a man of the world and I was only about 19. But I do remember him quite seriously saying to me, 'whatever you do Kavana, don't do cocaine'. 'Unfortunately, in that moment in time, it was a little too late for that, but I was like a deer in the headlights going, 'yes sir'.' It should have been different. Achieving his teenage dreams of appearing on Top of the Pops and gracing the cover of Smash Hits, Kavanagh (47) moved to Los Angeles and turned his hand to acting in 2001 when he was dropped from his record label, Virgin. Yet, as he points out in his memoir Pop Scars, life after 90s pop stardom had no shortage of dark, low moments. He lays many of the dizzying highs and hellish lows out in the book in arrestingly vivid detail, often with a side helping of gallows humour. He opens with the moment where he wakes up in a stranger's apartment, having just been paid for sex. There are the lows of alcoholism and drug addiction. There was the moment where he met a homeless woman and ended up smoking crack in a skip in Hackney with her, later giving her his bank card and PIN number to score more drugs. In among the pop anecdotes are poignant passages about loss, bereavement and rehab. And then, there was one of his lowest points. 'I do remember coming back from America and I just couldn't put the payments on my parents' house anymore, which I take full responsibility for,' he says. They were in their 70s and I had to move them and it was the most gutting feeling 'I was living pillar to post, staying with friends, trying to get another comeback going, and I remember going to a phone box and phoning my mum and dad to tell them that we're going to lose the house, basically, and then walking around in circles, wondering how the hell it's come to this. They were in their 70s and I had to move them and it was the most gutting feeling.' Kavanagh's father was from Crumlin. He moved to Manchester as a young man and brought the best of his homeland with him. 'I've always felt more Irish than English, to be honest with you. Oddly, I didn't go to Dublin until I'd started my pop career, but you just feel a connection, don't you?' he says. He talks of a number of beloved aunties and cousins, one of whom gave him his first piano. In the Kavanagh household, Irish TV and radio were on daily, making the moment when he was asked to appear on The Late Late Show all the sweeter. 'He [his dad] was very proud when I was asked to go on that show,' Kavanagh says, adding that Gay Byrne was the show's master of ceremonies at the time. 'I remember the guests and his charm and his humour – he was a real character.' Growing up in working-class Moston, Kavanagh, a strange mix of introvert and extrovert, believed he would be a popstar. With his pin-up looks and telegenic presence, it didn't take long for people to take notice. Asked to support Boyzone on tour in 1996, he recalls meeting the band and noting that they felt like home, with their accents and humour. Ronan Keating was the apparent frontman ('He gets a pass to be a little more sure of himself'), while Kavanagh got on well with Keith Duffy ('an open book and a whole lot of fun') and Shane ('a rogue of a man with a laid-back vibe about him'). Mikey Graham was a little more serious and quieter than the others, yet Kavanagh was instantly smitten by Stephen Gately. Tentatively, they both realised, without talking too much about it, that the other was gay, yet closeted in the pop world, and they enjoyed a brief fling on the tour, in a moment that Kavanagh described in Pop Scars as 'a glimpse of what innocent, real, genuine connection with another feels like'. 'The exciting thing about being on tour was being suddenly around loads of people and you can get a bit disguised in it all,' he says. 'You'd be doing your sound check and you'd pass each other. [Boyzone would] be very busy because they were big stars, but you'd have a little chat with Stephen and get these little flutters where you think, 'oh God, I wish I could say something'. I remember being a bit crestfallen, especially when the tour finished... and the sadness of not being around this person all the time 'It sounds a bit corny, but I suddenly felt there was someone else like me. And not only that, but I think he likes me too... You know when you get that first rush of attraction with somebody and it's mutual? And I think because there was an element of being secretive, there's that as well. 'We know he went on to find true love and get married, but it was my first experience of navigating relationships, texting and boundaries and, 'do I text straight back?'.' Owing mainly to busy schedules and globetrotting, their connection was short-lived. 'I remember being a bit crestfallen, especially when the tour finished, because of the sadness of the tour ending and then the sadness of not being around this person all the time, but you're whisked away and on to the next thing.' Kavanagh recalls the moment when he found out Gately had died in 2009 at the age of 33. 'It was a complete shock. The first time I'd experienced the death of someone that I knew that wasn't a family member,' he says. 'I still can't quite believe it, to be honest.' Kavanagh does recall how both he and Gately – and doubtless some others worried about revealing their sexuality – would politely dodge the girlfriend question, or talk on autopilot about the women they fancied when asked by journalists. Mainly, Kavanagh worried about what his fanbase might think if he wasn't straight. Alcohol and drugs loomed large as a means of comfort, of escape. 'Once you start [that], you collude in the lie,' he says. 'You've made your bed, now you've got to lay in it. And it kind of gets a bit awkward. You'd be racking your brains trying to answer. I loved girls, but I didn't understand what it was like to be sexually attracted to one.' He recalls hanging out with the Spice Girls and being 'terrified' they would realise he was gay. He laughs a little at the times he had to mask his sexuality around his pop peers. 'Some of the other pop lads backstage would be all, 'Oh, she's really sexy', and we'd go, 'Really? That's not what we'd say. We prefer her over there'.' These days, Kavanagh is enjoying chatting to journalists about his book, enthused about writing about his addiction from the other side. He feels creatively invigorated and back in the proverbial swing of things. In my day, there was no social media, no camera phones – who knows what that would have been like He is now sober three years and is excited once again about meetings and opportunities. The pop industry is a very different beast, for any number of reasons, since Kavanagh's heyday. Supports for mental health and addiction are offered and pop stars can build their own audiences on social media. Pop's dream factory still has a tendency to spit its players back out on to the street, but it's not quite as vicious a machine as it once was. 'In my day, there was no social media, no camera phones – who knows what that would have been like,' he says. 'Then, it was very much, meet the manager, go to the record label, get the deal. Now, everyone can be famous from their living room. 'I remember hanging out with a woman, some player in the music business, and she once said to me, 'remember, it's called the music business, not the music friendship'. I'll never forget that.' 'Pop Scars' by Anthony Kavanagh is out now via Bonnier books.
The Irish Sun
11-07-2025
- Entertainment
- The Irish Sun
I was a 90s heart-throb who partied with Spice Girls & Playboy bunnies but ended up homeless & smoking crack in a skip
IN the Nineties, pop star Kavana had dreams of becoming the next big superstar in music. But the I Can Make You Feel Good singer had a dramatic fall from grace when he was unable to curb his booze addiction and keep a lid on his drug-taking. Advertisement 10 Former Nineties icon Kavana has opened up about the dark side of fame and addiction Credit: Alamy 10 The Manchester-born singer burst on to the scene, partying with the Spice Girls Credit: Supplied 10 Kavana pictured after getting sober in 2023 Credit: X He was also forced to hide his homosexuality over fears his female fans would desert him. Now 47 and finally sober, Advertisement And he leaves no stone unturned. From his unexpected friendship with Kavana says: 'If only people knew this happy-go-lucky pop star who sings about making them feel good, actually feels the complete opposite.' The Manchester-born singer burst on to the scene, partying with the Spice Girls, Steps, Peter Andre and Boyzone among others. Other than a brief stint at McDonald's — where he was fired for stealing a Filet-O-Fish — being a pop star was the only job he'd had. Advertisement And he had all the credentials for it — good looks, a great voice and an impeccably groomed curtains hairdo. Kavana was signed to a record label in his teens, learning the ropes as a tea boy, before finally landing a deal. He was soon joining Boyzone on the Smash Hits tour and it wasn't long before he realised the Guinness-drinking Irish boys were lightweight partiers compared to him. I was a Noughties popstar who couldn't go 20mins without a drink - now I'm sober with a new career At one point, Ronan Keating had to tell him his nose had started bleeding during a post-gig booze-up, sparking a mad dash to the toilets. Kavana recalls in his memoir: 'The taste of metal and cocaine and possibly baby powder drips down my throat. I've overdone it again. I simply don't know when to stop lately. Advertisement 'Greedy cocaine mouse' 'When others decide they've had enough and want to call it a night I go back to my room and feel the need to carry on. 'I saw a documentary on lab mice being fed the stuff once and they kept going back for more. Little scurrying mice, all jittery and riddled with nerves. 'Tiny claws scratching against the ground. That's me. A greedy cocaine mouse. I splash my face with water and wipe any remnants of blood away from my nose. 'I wet a bit of toilet paper, roll it into a ball and put it up the nostril, stuffing it just far up enough to stop the drip and leave it lodged in. 'I'll have to make do with breathing out of one nostril for now. Charming.' Advertisement Having a cocaine-induced nose bleed in front of Ronan wasn't a good look, especially as he and Ronan's bandmate Stephen Gately — affectionately known as 'Steo' — had eyes for each other. But it would lead to a sweet romance. He writes: 'I've still got the ball of tissue shoved up my nostril but I have somehow forgotten about what happened pre-Steo arriving and am feeling calm and relaxed. 10 Kavana was forced to hide his homosexuality over fears his female fans would desert him Credit: Getty 10 Kavana, pictured with Mel C, had a dramatic fall from grace Credit: News Group Newspapers Ltd Advertisement ''I think I'll call it a night, lads,' says Ronan, with a genuine yawn. I'm not tired and it's nothing to do with the drugs that have by now thankfully worn off and been replaced with the tranquilising effects of the alcohol and Stephen's presence. "I'd normally be shy and nervous around someone I fancied but it wasn't like that with him. 'It's late. I'll probably go to bed too,' says Stephen, making me wonder if our deep connection is all in my head. 'I say nothing and leave the bar with the others. All three of us get in the lift. Ronan's room is on the same floor as Stephen's and without saying a word I get out with them on their floor, despite my own room being two floors up. I've no idea what I'm doing but my feet keep moving towards wherever Stephen is going, while Ronan walks ahead. 'I don't want the night to end and I've never been so determined for it not to. Stephen keeps talking while we walk towards his room, almost like it's some unspoken agreement we want to be alone together. ' 'Goodnight, lads,' says Ronan, which feels like his way of saying, 'It's OK with me'. Advertisement 'Hugs all round and it's finally just me and Stephen standing outside his room. He puts his key card in the door and we go in. 'I don't sleep in my hotel-room bed that night, and I get a glimpse of what innocent, real, genuine connection with another feels like.' The taste of metal and cocaine and possibly baby powder drips down my throat. I've overdone it again. I simply don't know when to stop lately. Such was his desire to hit the hard stuff, Kavana moved away from socialising with pop stars in favour of trendier company at London's notorious Nineties hotspot the Met Bar, populated by the Cool Britannia crowd. But he says: 'There's only so many parties or nights out at the Met Bar one can have without feeling like your soul is being sucked out, along with your wallet. 'A night out for me could end up going a multitude of ways depending on the company I keep, and lately I seem to be drawn to those who lean towards the non-stop partying type of evening, which are usually dressed up to begin with as, 'Let's have dinner at Nobu'. Advertisement 'I don't even like sushi, but sitting in a restaurant a few feet away from one of the Gallaghers or Kate Moss, in the desperate hope I also get invited to the inner sanctum of Cool Britannia does wonders for the ego. 'Not so much when you're back in your hotel room watching the ceiling with the birds tweeting, with a paranoid coked-up empty soul and wallet to go with it. 'Maybe one day I will get invited to Supernova Heights [Noel's former home in Camden] once I become pals with them. I just need to prove that there's more to me than what they think. Plus, I am also a northerner so surely we would get on like a house on fire, hopefully in Noel's £5million one in Belsize Park.' By this point Kavana's hits were drying up. In fact, new stars were pushing him down the pecking order when it came to bagging the cover of Smash Hits or Big magazine. 'Ecstasy in hot tubs' So he tried his luck in Los Angeles as a songwriter, a move made more tempting by the fact he could go under the radar over there. Advertisement This led to Manchester . He recalls leaving his pals 'open-mouthed' by his 'Hollywood escapades', including 'partying at the Playboy mansion where I did too much coke and had to be hosed down in a gold shower room by one of Mr Hefner's Playboy bunnies . . . or the wild parties I get invited to in the Hollywood Hills at movie producers' houses, necking ecstasy in hot tubs with A-listers and their hangers-on. "What I don't report back, though, is how lonely I'm starting to feel and that I'm worried I may have made a mistake but am too caught up in the whirlwind of it all to come home. 'Or that when I'm not partying with whichever new group of Hollywood 'friends' I've met randomly in the VIP of my locals, The Standard or The Viper Room, I'm usually on a comedown, eating pizza while watching The Tonight Show and feeling sad that I'm nowhere near getting to be on there myself.' It was in LA where his drugs and boozing hit new depths of despair. Advertisement He was lured on to crystal meth, and while staying with a sober pal in a booze-free house, he raided the bathroom cupboard and downed a bottle of Joop aftershave 10 Kavana, pictured with Dannii Minogue, has documented his journey from the Smash Hits Poll Winners Party to the Woolworths bargain bin in a new autobiography Credit: Alamy 10 Kavana on TV's Grease Is The Word in 2007 Credit: check copyright 10 Kavana also appeared in Celebrity Big Brother in 2015 Credit: Rex Features He says: 'Typically, it had to be the most pungent, campest of scents and the one you can smell a mile away. Still, beggars can't be choosers. The purple bottle stares at me like it knows exactly what kind of desperate low I've now sunk to. Advertisement 'Fingers shaking as I unscrew the cap, the sickly sweet scent hitting my nostrils. 'It's disgusting, but I'm too far gone to care. I wait for a second, imagining how this would look in a movie: The tragic alcoholic downing aftershave in a posh LA bathroom. 'I laugh at my reflection, what a joke — except the punchline is my life. 'The taste is beyond description, like someone's melted a plastic Christmas tree with battery acid and marzipan. 'Immediately I gag, my body repulsed against yet another foreign liquid, but I force it down. Advertisement 'One gulp. Two. I can't do a third. It burns all the way down to my stomach.' Kavana returned to the UK in the hope of sparking a music comeback. He starred in ITV talent show Grease Is The Word (designed to find the next Danny Zuko for the West End version of Grease). This led to the disastrous Loose Women appearance where he was so intoxicated his agent was told afterwards he was 'banned for life'. There was also a stint in Panto in Milton Keynes in 2009, playing Prince Charming in Cinderella alongside TV favourites Anthea Turner and Bobby Davro. He was supported by friend Amy Winehouse , who he had recently reacquainted with — plus two random women she had just met in a nearby KFC . 10 Kavana starred on The Big Reunion in 2013 Credit: Shutterstock Editorial Advertisement 10 Pop Scars by Anthony Kavanagh (Blink, £16.99) is out on Thursday Credit: supplied Unsurprisingly, the trio were kicked out by security during the second half of the show after numerous Amy outbursts, including 'Oi, you two ugly sisters are bitches'. He also appeared in Celebrity Big Brother in 2015. But after Kavana's dad passed away with cancer, he lived with his mum, who was battling dementia — a far cry from his old life in fancy London hotels when he was labelled pop's next big thing. Summing up his life at that point, he says: 'I tell myself, blissfully unaware of the desperate reality, that's it's perfectly normal for a man my age with no job and an escalating drink problem to be secretly living in an old people's sheltered housing complex with his mother.' Advertisement Much later, Kavana would tell a rehab group his final almighty binge 'culminated in me smoking crack in a skip with a homeless lady who I bonded with then trusted with my Monzo card to go buy more drugs and who never returned.' But by becoming sober, moving out and writing his new autobiography, it's clear he has now turned a corner. Pop Scars by Anthony Kavanagh (Blink, £16.99) is out on Thursday.
Daily Record
27-06-2025
- Entertainment
- Daily Record
The Bluebells to make Glastonbury debut after more than 40 years
In the 80s, Bobby Bluebell and other band members, including singer Ken McCluskey and his brother and drummer David McCluskey, graced the covers of teen magazines such as Smash Hits. Scots pop legends The Bluebells are to make their Glastonbury debut more than 40 years after they first shot to fame. In the 80s, Bobby Bluebell and other band members, including singer Ken McCluskey and his brother and drummer David McCluskey, graced the covers of teen magazines such as Smash Hits. They also regularly appeared on Top of the Pops. But it's only now as they hit state pension age they'll finally play the iconic music festival alongside the likes of Neil Young and Alanis Morissette. Bobby, 66, said: 'We are doing Glastonbury and we've never played Glastonbury before. So it's a real shock to be doing it. It's a great festival and a great crowd. It's something that's been on our bucket list. 'I'm 66. This is mental, but Paul McCartney is in his 80s, so there is no end to it. 'I'm way better than I was in 1984 and Ken's a better singer. 'It's our Indian summer and it's great to be back in the spotlight.' The Bluebells became an integral part of the Scottish pop scene in the early 1980s alongside the likes of Orange Juice, Aztec Camera, Del Amitri, Texas and Simple Minds. The city was awash with record label A&R men from London seeking the next big thing when Young at Heart charted at No8 in 1984. The song also shot to No1 in 1993 after it featured in a Volkswagen TV ad. Bobby, whose real name is Robert Hodgens, had co-written the hit with his girlfriend, Bananarama's Siobhan Fahey. The couple lived in London and regularly hung out at trendy nightclubs despite Bobby's geeky appearance and lack of fashion sense. Of the relationship, Bobby said: 'When I met Siobhan she was a shy person and I helped her come out of her shell. 'At that time, it was the New Romantic era, but I was walking about in a duffle coat and national health glasses. 'We were good together. We were a showbiz couple. 'The first song we wrote was Young At Heart so we obviously got off to a good start.' He added: 'My biggest introduction to London was when I left home and moved in with Siobhan. 'People like Kevin Rowland and Bananarama and Elvis Costello were all great friends. We'd go out together. 'But Glasgow had a better scene than London. ' The club music scene in Glasgow was as good as anywhere in the world, if not better. 'You couldn't be a wallflower in Glasgow. You'd get trampled on. 'I had gone to clubs when I was 13 or 14 on my own which was quite scary because there was a big gang scene in Glasgow and I looked quite geeky. 'I had to learn to overcome being shy. 'Siobhan and everybody I've met in a band has had to overcome their shyness. 'You've had no choice but to stand up on the stage and project.' Bobby said: 'I spoke to Siobhan last week. We are still great friends. I'd like to work with her again because I think, why are we not doing anything? I'll meet up with her again.' The Bluebells will be performing hit after hit at Glastonbury including Cath and I'm Falling. Also part of today's line-up is Belfast band Kneecap who will perform at 4pm on the West Holt stage. The trio are being welcomed by festival organiser Michael Eavis despite an Prime Minister, Keir Starmer claiming their appearance is 'problematic'. Bobby believes there aren't enough political acts in pop music who are willing to stand up and be counted for what they believe in, if anything. 'I'm not a fan of Kneecap's music but it is a dangerous path people are taking by trying to silence them because it is part of their act,' he said. 'Some rappers sing about the life they live and you have heavy metal bands with bats and blood. 'Kneecap have a point of view that is from their background of being a section of society that were oppressed and rebelling against their government. 'What is happening in Gaza is inexcusable and Kneecap are being pulled up simply for the fact that they are not agreeing with the status quo. 'Imagine that had been the other way around and we were speaking out in favour of innocent people being bombed. 'If you're telling me the most extreme thing in politics is Kneecap you should give up.' Though Kneecap were dropped from the TRNMT line-up, Bobby added: 'Why should the person who runs TRNSMT be the one to judge? What are they so frightened of? 'Is being anti-something enough to get you kicked off. I'd like to see the list of what is allowed and what isn't. 'They are saying the public can't make their own mind and will be brainwashed by it. 'I hate to say it but if you go to Ibrox or Parkhead every week you'll be charging half the population because people are singing songs that are much worse.'
Metro
21-06-2025
- Entertainment
- Metro
90s pop icons missed out on Glastonbury legends slot for devastating reason
The Glastonbury legends slot almost turned a deeper shade of blue, Ian 'H' Watkins has revealed. For almost 30 years, Ian has been affectionately known as 'H', an acronym for Hyperactive – his energetic character being an instrumental part of Steps' success when personalities in pop weren't just all the rage, they were essential. It's a moniker which is a lot to live up to, though, particularly when you're in a band as exposed as Steps were. If they weren't playing to a sell-out arena, they were rarely off television, almost on SM:TV as much as Ant and Dec. In 1997, 5,6,7,8 was unleashed on the world to moderate success in the charts, but ruled school discos. It was a steady rise to the top of the charts for Steps when their fourth single, a cover of The Bee Gees' hit Tragedy, and a B Side of ballad Heartbeat got to number one in such an extraordinary fashion. It's sold more than 1.2million copies in the UK alone, a remarkable feat for any pop act from the Smash Hits era, and almost got them a spot on the Pyramid Stage at Glastonbury when it was saturated with nothing but guitar bands and 90s house DJs. 'The Bee Gees asked us to join them on stage,' Ian tells Metro. 'But it was a really late request, and we literally couldn't get it all together in time. Of course, some of them have passed away now, so that will never happen again. But that's another little jewel in the Steps crown.' With their own critically acclaimed musical, Here and Now, about to tour the UK and eventually make it to the West End, there are few things left on the Steps bucket list to tick off but they're not deterred from one day getting on that coveted Glastonbury bill, either in the Legends slot or the festival's first pop-friendly stage, Avalon. 'We're the only ones, really, from that era that have all the original members and are still going, so it feels like we've earned our stripes by now.' More than earning their stripes, Steps are still headlining festivals and breaking records. In 2022, they joined an exclusive club of bands to score a number one album across four decades. But now Watkins is on stage and topping charts as his true, authentic self. He has nothing to hide anymore – it's not the 90s when, if you were a good-looking male, the press was frothing to uncover secrets about your sex life. For Ian, there was always an underlying fear that they would discover he was gay when the press had a field day outing gay pop stars like Will Young and Stephen Gately. During one holiday with his then-boyfriend, Ian got the call he'd been dreading. 'They knew where I was, who I was with, and why I was there – I had a boyfriend. Immediately, I flew back from holiday, told my loved ones, told my family, told my parents, and then the next day, they didn't run the story, because I didn't give them quotes. 'But they threatened me for many years, and I felt like my coming out story was taken from me; my power was taken away, so it was a really emotional, dark time for me.' He wasn't alone, though. There were several pop stars gathered in the same closet, cautiously able to give solace to one another. Ian became particularly close with Lance Bass of N'SYNC and Boyzone's Gateley, but concedes: 'If the press knew you were gay, it was a really tricky thing to be seen together or to even admit that you were friends with another closeted gay person.' Instead, he clung to his closest straight women. His bandmate Lisa Scott-Lee, the girls from Liberty X and S Club… and Britney Spears. 'All of her dancers were gay anyway,' he says. 'People thought I was dating Brittany a long time ago, but that obviously wasn't the case – that was strange.' Ian is about to turn 50. Hyperactivity is no longer the personality he's defined by. His life is calmer, albeit busy with running his two children to school, walking the dogs, building a home, and organising his local annual Pride with his partner. 'Since having children, I've realised that education starts really early on, and it drowns out the bigotry,' he says. 'I go to all of the local schools and talk about how being different is something to be celebrated. My partner and I organise Cowbridge Pride, which is in its fifth year now. 'Cowbridge used to be the most conservative, laidback town, but now we have 2000 people marching every year, and we raise money for all of the schools to have LGBT resources in all of their libraries.' Ian is exactly where he's meant to be in life, and with Steps on a hiatus, he's finally managed to turn his passion project into a reality – a children's book, Pride and The Rainbow Warriors, educating children (and some parents) about LGBTQ+ history. All of the main characters represent a different colour in the original Pride flag, and all have traits corresponding to the original meaning. More importantly, Ian is finally cool to his children. 'Two of them are named after my kids – it's lush,' he grins. To view this video please enable JavaScript, and consider upgrading to a web browser that supports HTML5 video For those of us old enough to remember sneakily watching Queer As Folk with the volume turned down to one and one eye on the bedroom door in case anyone walked in, a children's book about LGBTQ+ was inconceivable. More Trending Now, with shows like Heartstopper becoming so hugely popular and a plethora of openly LGBTQ+ popstars ruling the charts, the world feels unrecognisable compared to just a few years ago. How children look at and look up to LGBTQ+ people is completely different today. 'It's something that I felt we needed, because there's a real lack of resources for children of all ages, also parents to be educated too,' he says. 'It's all about celebrating your superpower, and being different is an amazing thing. 'I was bullied terribly growing up because I was different, and I didn't know at that time what that different was. Luckily, I had an amazing art teacher, Mr. Owen, who is still one of my dear friends today, but if it wasn't for that man, who knows where I would have ended up.' Pride and The Rainbow Warriors is available in paperback now . Got a story? If you've got a celebrity story, video or pictures get in touch with the entertainment team by emailing us celebtips@ calling 020 3615 2145 or by visiting our Submit Stuff page – we'd love to hear from you. MORE: I went to Glastonbury and discovered it's just really overrated MORE: Heartbreaking reason Glastonbury nearly ended in the late 90s MORE: Glastonbury mystery performer 'gives away' appearance with arrival in the UK
