Latest news with #TexasChainsawMassacre
Buzz Feed
3 days ago
- Entertainment
- Buzz Feed
52 Hilarious Fails That I Can't Help But Laugh At
Well, they're not wrong. I didn't know the Texas Chainsaw Massacre series had a holiday film! Insert *YOU TRIED* sticker. This isn't the Star Wars I is that E.T.? This was an honest mistake. Oops — sorry, Mr. McEldroon. I MEAN, anonymous... That had to be an awkward conversation. Austin??? Is that you? If I were the tooth fairy, I'd give this kid extra money for his frankness. Double-check your links, everyone! NBD — everyone will just think you're a big fan of the band! WHAT is safe??? (It's supposed to say "pork.") Finally, a spot for everyone straddling an exercise ball! This could happen to anyone! Who designed this??? There was probably a better way to convey this. This is what happens now that today's kids didn't live through 9/11! Well, that cut off at the worst possible spot. Or the best spot, depending how you look at it. I didn't realize an accent could be sexist! NEWS: Thomas the Tank Engine has been cast in Avengers: Doomsday! Who thought this was a good idea??? You're telling me no one saw an issue with this sign??? Or this one? That's a funny-looking whale! Ah, yes, the perfect moment for a push notification! This could've used a proofread!!! Honestly, you deserve this for what Britain did to India. The cake decorator's brain was simply not firing on all cylinders. Neither was this person's. Or this person's. He does have a point. Let this be a lesson to *always* double-check who you're sending your nudes to. This is every teenager's worst nightmare. At least she seemed chill about it? The look on the cat's face screams, "You'll pay for this, human." Time to break out the spoons! I feel bad for this poor guy, but his expression is hilarious. This person was NOT reading the Harry Potter I remember. The fanfic is apparently called Harry Potter and the Psychic Serpent, and it was a trilogy. Apparently, you could download it in a big file where the first four books were word-for-word the same as the real ones, and then things diverged in the fifth. Oh, and it was also apparently pretty good! I'm not sure that was the look she had in mind... The price probably should've tipped him off. Hmmm, that's not how I remember it... Nothing like a taco shell tortilla! BrilDag sounds better than birthday, anyway! How do you even make this mistake? Finally, a church I'm interested in joining! Would you like some ketchup with that? I know I'm about to say something controversial, so bear with me here...I don't think that's a violin. How dumb can you be? Might as well bleach the whole thing pink at this point! I see no issue here! Or here! And finally, this fail is actually really wholesome.
Daily Record
26-05-2025
- Daily Record
Suspect in Michael Gaine slurry tank murder dismisses 'preposterous' claims he used chainsaw
Michael Kelley as Gardai confirm the remains found belong to Kerry farmer Michael Gaine. The suspect charged with the murder of farmer Michael Gaine has labelled accusations that he used a chainsaw to dismember the victim's body as "preposterous". In an interview with the Irish Mirror, Michael Kelley, 53, a former American soldier, confirmed his arrest by Gardaí in relation to the suspected murder. Mr Gaine's assumed dismembered remains were unearthed from slurry spread across his property in Kenmare, Co Kerry. During a comprehensive telephone conversation shortly before Gardaí announced the official identification of the remains, Mr Kelley dismissed the theory that he utilised a chainsaw found at the farm to sever the body. Reaffirming his innocence and stating his determination to stay and fight the allegations, Mr Kelley, currently living in Tralee, vowed to face the challenge head-on, reports the Irish Mirror. "The chainsaw thing is preposterous or they would have charged me. I mean Texas Chainsaw Massacre bulls**t? I mean please. Preposterous," he commented. Hailing from Maine in the US, Mr Kelley disclosed how Gardaí presented him with "glossy photographs" of the chainsaw taken from Mr Gaine's land, and his reaction upon seeing them. "They had colour glossy photos of the chainsaw. I said 'Where the f**k is the glossy photograph of anything having to do with Michael Gaine's body?' I didn't see it." He accused the authorities of lacking evidence and challenged them, saying, "This is a little card game that they're playing. Where's your evidence? Where's the macabre photo? "They don't have it. They have nothing and if they did show me a colour glossy photo of the human remains they had I bet you I would have called bulls**t right there and said there's no way that those human remains could be his." Mr Kelley was speaking as photos epict him toiling away on Mr Gaine's estate amidst a vast Garda search for the well-regarded farmer's remains, where he is observed utilising an axe as officers press on with their enquiry. In a recent statement, the openly acknowledged suspect contends he's been cast as a "patsy" suggesting the authorities homed in on him due to his residence on the property. "After 24 hours and one minute of him going missing they descended on the farm with helicopters and drones. It's unheard of. "They have been sitting on human remains this whole time and not saying anything about it until all of a sudden they're accusing me of Michael Gaine's murder and they have not shown so much as his body. They're trying to say the remains are of Michael Gaine because they're trying to patsy me," he elaborated. Continuing, Mr Kelley confided he has previously operated the chainsaw found at the scene, yet he steadfastly believes the Gardaí cannot link it to his DNA nor tie him to the alleged offence. "It's Michael Gaine's chainsaw. Yes [I used it before]. The whole thing is bunk and if there was anything to it they would've charged me," he declared. "It's preposterous and if it was true they would have charged me. It's preposterous that they present this chainsaw as though it is somehow linked to the disappearance of Mr Gaine." Mr Kelley shared with us his experience of living on Mr Gaine's land for several weeks while officers scoured the area for remains, expressing his belief that despite the discovery, Gardaí lack "no evidence. "I think you should just let the evidence speak for itself. I have not seen conclusive evidence. The guards did not present me with one iota of evidence that he is dead. Not one bit," he asserted. When questioned about his confidence in Gardaí not finding his DNA related to the alleged crime, he responded cautiously: "That's one of those questions that my solicitor would get into me answering so I don't want to go against his advice, he's like my doctor here." He also wanted to highlight his thoughts on the DNA testing process: "I did want to point out though that I don't know how long it takes to do a DNA test but in my opinion, probably not in more than a week." He further commented on the investigation timeline: "Now they reported that they searched those tanks seven weeks ago. So whatever evidence they've taken out of those tanks now they could've and should've been able to identify as belonging to Michael Gaine while I was still on the farm." The individual challenged the evidence, stating: "So it seems to me as though if they actually had Michael Gaine's remains, that they would have told you – not about their belief system, that they believe this and they're satisfied that, they would have told you – we have DNA evidence confirming we have the remains of Michael Gaine. "Have you heard that? I've not heard that. I've heard statements about their beliefs and with what they are so called satisfied and as far as I'm concerned that is their admission that they don't have evidence," he asserted. Gardaí have since said the human remains have been positively identified as belonging to Michael Gaine. Reflecting upon the extensive search efforts, Mr Kelley expressed his astonishment at its magnitude, despite having witnessed it while working on his land. "Listen to me, this guy was gone for 24 hours and one f***ing minute and all of a sudden there's a coast guard helicopter flying overhead. Now who have they ever done that for?" Questioning the victim's identity, he questioned: "Who is this guy? Who is this Michael Gaine that they would do this for him?" Despite previous comments suggesting an acceptable relationship, Mr Kelley refrained from discussing his opinion of Mr Gaine or detailing the nature of their relationship, adhering to legal advice. "No I can't say anything about Michael Gaine," he remarked, on guidance from his legal counsel. However, he revealed that he last saw Mr Gaine the day prior to his disappearance. "I don't want to make a mistake here. He went missing on the 19th, right? Is that not the correct date? The date he is alleged to have gone missing. I don't want to trip up here, I think it was the 19th," he stated. "I believe the 20th was the search, I just can't f***ing remember. It is as reported – I saw him the day before the big search." Mr Kelley clarified that he was speaking to address matters of fact and public record, but declined to discuss certain topics, such as his relationship with Mr Gaine. "I'm being told by a solicitor to shut up. That's his advice. There may be a very good reason especially as it appears the police are – and are trying to do a fit-up," he claimed. Mr Kelley also shared his experience of working on Mr Gaine's farm, alleging that the missing man had instructed him to burn items in a pit. "When I was at this farm and I was observing their searches – first they searched the tank, then I mentioned to them an area where Michael Gaine had dug a pit about six-feet deep and we had filled it with furniture and garbage. "This was all being done under the cover of darkness for some reason and then he would have me light it for him as he would often burn garbage off," he claimed. "He had me light it for him and then he would cover it over the next day like it wasn't there. I told them where that was and they immediately dug it up." He also expressed bewilderment at the use of metal detectors in the search, saying: "And then they started going around with metal detectors everywhere. Again if you're looking for the fallen body of a man who's recently disappeared, I don't think that you need to search beneath the ground with metal detectors to come up with that body," and added, "He's not made out of metal. My deduction at that point was they must have found something in that tank which led them to conclude that there was more to find."
Irish Daily Mirror
26-05-2025
- Irish Daily Mirror
Michael Gaine suspect rejects theory he used a chainsaw to chop up remains
The suspect in the murder of farmer Michael Gaine says it is 'preposterous' to suggest he used a chainsaw to dismember his remains. This paper has now spoken at length to former US soldier Michael Kelley, 53, who last week admitted to us he was arrested by Gardaí on suspicion of the murder. Mr Gaine's suspected dismembered remains were discovered in slurry which was spread on his farmland in Kenmare, Co Kerry. Speaking to this paper in a lengthy phone interview just before Gardaí confirmed the remains had been formally identified, Mr Kelley told us he completely rejects the Garda theory that he used a chainsaw, found on the farm, to chop up his remains. Once again insisting his innocence, Mr Kelley, who is now residing in Tralee, also told us he has no intention of fleeing – and he will 'fight this one out no matter what.' 'The chainsaw thing is preposterous or they would have charged me. I mean Texas Chainsaw Massacre bulls**t? I mean please. Preposterous,' he said. Mr Kelley, who is originally from Maine in the US, revealed to us that Gardaí showed him 'glossy photographs' of the chainsaw seized from Mr Gaine's land – and what he said to them when they did. 'They had colour glossy photos of the chainsaw. I said 'Where the f**k is the glossy photograph of anything having to do with Michael Gaine's body?' I didn't see it. 'This is a little card game that they're playing. Where's your evidence? Where's the macabre photo?' he said. 'They don't have it. They have nothing and if they did show me a colour glossy photo of the human remains they had I bet you I would have called bulls**t right there and said there's no way that those human remains could be his.' Mr Kelley was speaking to us as we today reveal exclusive photos of him working on Mr Gaine's land during the massive Garda search for the popular farmer's remains. He can be seen working with an axe as officers conduct the investigation. Speaking yesterday, the self-admitted suspect claims he is being used as a 'patsy' and that officers suspected him because he lived on the land. 'After 24 hours and one minute of him going missing they descended on the farm with helicopters and drones. It's unheard of. "They have been sitting on human remains this whole time and not saying anything about it until all of a sudden they're accusing me of Michael Gaine's murder and they have not shown so much as his body. They're trying to say the remains are of Michael Gaine because they're trying to patsy me,' he said. Mr Kelley told us that he has used the chainsaw in the past, but that Gardaí will not connect his DNA to the suspected crime. 'It's Michael Gaine's chainsaw. Yes [I used it before]. The whole thing is bunk and if there was anything to it they would've charged me,' he said. 'It's preposterous and if it was true they would have charged me. It's preposterous that they present this chainsaw as though it is somehow linked to the disappearance of Mr Gaine.' Mr Kelley told us how he continued to reside on Mr Gaine's land for several weeks as officers combed the area looking for his remains – and how he believes, despite the discovery of remains, that Gardaí have 'no evidence.' 'I think you should just let the evidence speak for itself. I have not seen conclusive evidence. The guards did not present me with one iota of evidence that he is dead. Not one bit,' he claimed. Asked if he was confident that Gardaí will not find his DNA in connection with the alleged crime he said: 'That's one of those questions that my solicitor would get into me answering so I don't want to go against his advice, he's like my doctor here. 'I did want to point out though that I don't know how long it takes to do a DNA test but in my opinion, probably not in more than a week. 'Now they reported that they searched those tanks seven weeks ago. So whatever evidence they've taken out of those tanks now they could've and should've been able to identify as belonging to Michael Gaine while I was still on the farm. 'So it seems to me as though if they actually had Michael Gaine's remains, that they would have told you – not about their belief system, that they believe this and they're satisfied that, they would have told you – we have DNA evidence confirming we have the remains of Michael Gaine. 'Have you heard that? I've not heard that. I've heard statements about their beliefs and with what they are so called satisfied and as far as I'm concerned that is their admission that they don't have evidence,' he claimed. In a subsequent statement to this paper last night, Gardaí have since confirmed the human remains 'have been identified as being the remains of Michael Gaine'. Speaking about the search, which he says he watched as he continued to work the land, Mr Kelley said he could not believe the scale of it. 'Listen to me, this guy was gone for 24 hours and one f***ing minute and all of a sudden there's a coast guard helicopter flying overhead. Now who have they ever done that for? 'Who is this guy? Who is this Michael Gaine that they would do this for him?' he said. Mr Kelley refused to speak about what kind of a person Mr Gaine was or what his relationship was like with him – having previously told us he found the victim to be 'OK'. 'No I can't say anything about Michael Gaine,' he said, citing advice from his solicitor. He did however tell us that he last saw Mr Gaine on the day before he disappeared. 'I don't want to make a mistake here. He went missing on the 19th, right? Is that not the correct date? The date he is alleged to have gone missing. I don't want to trip up here, I think it was the 19th,' he said. 'I believe the 20th was the search, I just can't f***ing remember. It is as reported – I saw him the day before the big search.' Mr Kelley said he was speaking to us to clarify what he said were matters of fact and public record – but said certain questions, such as about his relationship with Mr Gaine, he was staying quiet about. 'I'm being told by a solicitor to shut up. That's his advice. There may be a very good reason especially as it appears the police are – and are trying to do a fit-up,' he claimed. Mr Kelley also told us about working on Mr Gaine's farm and claimed the missing man had made him burn things in a pit. 'When I was at this farm and I was observing their searches – first they searched the tank, then I mentioned to them an area where Michael Gaine had dug a pit about six-feet deep and we had filled it with furniture and garbage. 'This was all being done under the cover of darkness for some reason and then he would have me light it for him as he would often burn garbage off,' he claimed. 'He had me light it for him and then he would cover it over the next day like it wasn't there. I told them where that was and they immediately dug it up.' He also spoke of searches using metal detectors during the search – which he could not understand. 'And then they started going around with metal detectors everywhere. Again if you're looking for the fallen body of a man who's recently disappeared, I don't think that you need to search beneath the ground with metal detectors to come up with that body,' he said. 'He's not made out of metal. My deduction at that point was they must have found something in that tank which led them to conclude that there was more to find.'
Yahoo
23-05-2025
- Entertainment
- Yahoo
Jessica Biel Recalls Auditioning for ‘The Notebook' With Ryan Gosling — While ‘Covered in Blood'
Jessica Biel brought a unique take to her audition with Ryan Gosling for Nicholas Sparks' The Notebook. Reflecting on the experience during the Wednesday, May 21, episode of The View, Biel, 43, revealed that she was also 'covered in blood' for her screen-test with Gosling, 44. 'I'm racking my brain to make sure I didn't accentuate this story,' Biel quipped. 'I was shooting The Texas Chainsaw Massacre [when] I was super young.' According to Biel, she was still wearing the fake blood when she went to read for the role in the 2004 romantic drama. 'It was going to be the greatest option for me in my career,' Biel recalled. 'Ryan and the director, [Nick Cassavetes], came to my trailer. They came to us on location, and we auditioned in my trailer at work — and I didn't get it.' 30 of the Most Romantic Movies of All Time: 'The Notebook,' 'When Harry Met Sally' and More She added, 'In my mind, I just remember having blood on me and being in that white tank top. [I] took my cowboy hat off and was, like, 'OK, I'd love to fall in love with you. Let's do this.' It was [a] very strange, very Hollywood moment.' Gosling portrayed Noah Calhoun in the feature film, starring opposite Rachel McAdams as leading lady Allie Hamilton. While Biel didn't get the part, she did end up falling in love offscreen with now-husband Justin Timberlake, who coincidentally has his own association with Gosling. Timberlake, 44, and Gosling both got their start on The All-New Mickey Mouse Club in the early 1990s. 'Funny enough, his mother had to keep her job in Canada [during] the second year that we were on the television show, and my mom was his guardian for, like, six months,' Timberlake previously said on The Ellen DeGeneres Show in 2011. 'We actually lived together … [and] we were probably a little bit closer than the rest of the kids [who] were on the show just because we had to share a bathroom.' Britney Spears Sobs in 'Notebook' Audition for Rachel McAdams' Allie At the time, Timberlake gushed that Gosling was 'one of the best actors of our generation.' 'We used to do, like, terrible things. We thought we were so cool,' Timberlake added at the time. 'Looking back on them, it wasn't as bad as I thought they were at the time. We, like, stole a golf cart. We were like, 'Yeah, man, we're stealing a golf cart.' Meanwhile, it's on a back lot [and] there's just golf carts everywhere.' According to the former 'NSync singer, he and Gosling would then drive their borrowed vehicles over to get milkshakes between takes. Timberlake started dating Biel in 2007, three years after The Notebook was released, before they got married in 2012. Together, they share two sons.
Thrill Geek
13-05-2025
- Entertainment
- Thrill Geek
Leatherface Is Coming to Vegas: Texas Chainsaw Massacre Haunted House Joins Universal Horror Unleashed -
Grab your courage and brace for the buzz, 'The Texas Chainsaw Massacre' is officially joining Universal Horror Unleashed, the year-round horror experience opening August 14 at AREA15 in Las Vegas. For the first time ever, guests will step through the 1974 horror classic in chronological order, from the eerie Texas cemetery and grimy gas station to the deranged family home. Every step leads you deeper into madness as you encounter Leatherface, his unsettling kin, and the unforgettable sound of revving chainsaws. But the terror doesn't stop there. The haunted house connects to Kill Vault, one of four immersive horror zones. Expect back-alley surgeons, stalkers, and slashers interacting up-close as you explore dim corners filled with rusty tools and haunted stories. Hungry for more? 'Rough Cuts' will serve chainsaw-carved small plates—just don't ask what's in the barbecue. Universal Horror Unleashed will feature four haunted houses, including: The Texas Chainsaw Massacre Universal Monsters Blumhouse's The Exorcist: Believer Scarecrow: The Reaping Plus, expect themed bars, creepy cocktails, exclusive merchandise, and more immersive horror than ever before. Tickets are now on sale at Follow @ThrillGeek on X, Instagram, Facebook, and YouTube for more terrifying updates as opening night draws near.
