Latest news with #neighbors
New York Times
14 hours ago
- General
- New York Times
What if Robert Frost's Neighbor Was Right?
'Something there is that doesn't love a wall, / That wants it down,' Robert Frost observed in his poem 'Mending Wall.' I am one of those somethings. When the speaker of Frost's poem wonders what use a wall might be that encloses no livestock, I wonder that, too. When he asks his neighbor just how it is that good fences make good neighbors, he is asking the question of my own heart. I was irked 30 years ago when our neighbor said she intended to install a free-standing fence between our driveways. 'For privacy,' she said. My husband and I raised no objection, but we disliked the very idea of the fence, which would block our view of the woods behind our neighbor's house and make things unnecessarily difficult for the creatures that came and went from there. It seemed unneighborly to humans and wildlife alike. We were a family who spent more time outdoors than in, always nearby when our neighbor pulled into her driveway. Once the fence was up, she was no longer obliged to speak to us. This, we suddenly understood, was the whole point of a privacy fence. Not to keep anything in or anything out but to render invisibility. To offer some approximation of solitude. We never became close, but as the years passed, we settled into an ordinary sort of neighborliness, stopping to chat when we happened to meet on the street, helping each other out in emergencies. She mostly stayed on her side of the fence, and we mostly stayed on ours. By the time she died two years ago, the unbeloved fence had become the scaffolding for pokeweed and native vines. Some of them I planted, and some came courtesy of our avian neighbors. Good fences, it turns out, make good perching places for birds with bellies full of berries and seeds. The fence had been built in a shadowbox style, and the gaps between the boards gave reaching vines room for twisting. Their flowers fed pollinators, their leaves fed caterpillars, and their berries fed birds and other animals. Carpenter bees nested in the fence's wood, and small birds nested on its crossbeams, perfectly camouflaged by vines. Want all of The Times? Subscribe.
The Guardian
a day ago
- General
- The Guardian
Should back gardens be sacrosanct, or are loud phones and speakers OK?
It's common these days for people to play music in their gardens on smart speakers or smartphones. But is it fair on the neighbours? Should gardens be quiet spaces without these kinds of sounds? Graham French, Sutton Coldfield Post your answers (and new questions) below or send them to nq@ A selection will be published next Sunday.
Yahoo
2 days ago
- General
- Yahoo
Woman Says Her Neighbors' Backyard Is ‘Full of Junk' — So She Was Shocked When They Asked to Put a Trampoline in Hers
A woman shared that her neighbors' backyard is 'full of junk' — and they recently asked her if they could put a trampoline for their kids on her unused land The woman said that while she feels 'a bit sorry' for her neighbors' children, she's unsure if she wants to say yes The woman is now seeking advice on how she should respondA woman shared that her neighbors — whose backyard is 'full of junk' — want to store something in her backyard, and she's unsure what to do about it. The woman detailed her experience on the 'Am I Being Unreasonable?' forum on Mumsnet, where she explained that she lives on a street with homes that have 'a bit of extra garden' in the rear of the houses because a local farmer allotted his unused land to local residents. The woman said that she keeps her bonus plot of land mowed and tidy while she decides what she wants to do with it. Meanwhile, she noted that her neighbors keeps their area full of clutter. The issue? The original poster (OP) said that the neighbors recently asked if they could put a trampoline for their kids on her unused land. Never miss a story — sign up for to stay up-to-date on the best of what PEOPLE has to offer, from celebrity news to compelling human interest stories. While the OP admitted she feels 'a bit sorry' for the neighbors' children because of the state of their own backyard, she is also torn over how to respond. 'Part of me thinks [I should] say yes as their garden at the rear of their house is awful and full of junk. But then another bit kicks in and thinks, 'No, sort your own garden out,' ' the woman said, before asking her fellow community members for advice. The vast majority of commenters said that the OP should absolutely not agree to let her neighbors use her plot of land when they are perfectly capable of decluttering their plot. 'Tell your neighbors to get lost!! Honestly, some people are so cheeky,' said one person. 'NO!!!! They need to sort their garden out. Next thing you know, their junk will seep into your 'shared' space,' added someone else. 'It's not your fault their garden is awful. If they want somewhere for their children to play, they should sort out their own space,' said yet another community member. Another person said that the OP shouldn't hold the fact that the neighbors asked against them — while also noting that they think she should deny the request. 'I don't think it's cheeky to ask: don't ask, don't get,' they said. 'But you're well within your rights to say no. If you don't want it, you don't have to have it, and I wouldn't because you'll never get rid of it.' Read the original article on People
Washington Post
2 days ago
- General
- Washington Post
Asking Eric: Neighbors' trash habits cause a ruckus
Dear Eric: We live in a big city where houses are very close together. My neighbors keep their trash bins in the driveway close to my front and side doors. They have three dogs, and the bin banging begins early, sometimes before 7 in the morning. My living room and kitchen are right next to their driveway, so I hear banging from trash lids all day long from throwing dog waste and more. When I worked, I probably didn't notice as much, but I'm retired now, and it is really getting on my nerves. I want to ask them to please try to close the bin quietly instead of just letting the lids drop and bang, but my husband thinks they will retaliate and make it worse. We mostly have a good relationship with them, but I do not want to have this banging the rest of my life. Ideally, they should put their bins in the alley, but I would settle for quiet shutting as I guess it is convenient for them to keep close to my door. Your thoughts? — Quiet Please Quiet: If you have a mostly peaceable relationship with your neighbors, it doesn't seem likely that a request like this would escalate to retaliation. It's a reasonable ask and your solutions — either moving the bins or being more conscientious about shutting them — are seemingly easy to implement. Whether in a big city with its close proximities, or a remote piece of land where the nearest house is barely in view, or somewhere in between, we have to figure out how to live in harmony with those around us. As with any other relationship, one of the foundations of good neighborhood is communication. And that runs both ways. When you let them know what you're experiencing, you empower them to make a change. So, don't be afraid to speak up. Now, it's also true that some people are, well, jerks. And if that's the case and they set about making more noise, rather than less, then you've got a different issue. But I'm hoping conscientiousness wins out for your sake. Dear Eric: I have remained close with my college roommate, Chris, for 45 years. Life has not been easy for her due to various health issues, which I believe all stem from her unhealthy eating habits. About 10 years ago, after Chris was laid off from a job she loved and had worked at for years, she found herself in a financial bind. She came to stay with my family in another state for several months, rent free, while she looked for another job and an affordable apartment, neither of which panned out. After advising us that she was going to stop looking until she got back from a planned cruise, I finally had to ask her to leave when we realized we were being taken advantage of. Before Chris left, we paid off her car loan to help her along. Since then, Chris has continually called to ask for money because she knows I can afford to give it to her. She has asked for and been given money from other friends as well to help her out with her medical bills. The last time she called I finally put my foot down and told her I was not going to give her any more money. Now I find myself feeling guilty, but I am also feeling resentful. I do worry about Chris and what will happen to her. Am I wrong for feeling this way? — Guilty Friend Friend: It makes sense that you'd feel a complicated mix of emotions. You care about Chris — and have for decades — and you want what's best for her. You've also put a lot of energy into helping her out. But, from your telling, Chris isn't being active enough in finding solutions to her financial troubles. Or, at least, as active as you'd prefer. So, the guilt probably stems from the feeling that you can do more, even though you suspect that doing more for Chris might not solve the underlying issue. It's worth considering that Chris may have other struggles that are preventing her from getting back on her feet. This doesn't give her free license to treat you like an ATM, but perhaps thinking about her journey in a different way will help ease the resentment you're feeling. Now that you've drawn the line, you have an opportunity to redefine how your friendship works. You might talk with her about how those requests felt to you and how you're feeling now. The goal is to clear the air a bit so that, ideally, you can be there for each other as longtime friends and, potentially, you can provide support for Chris in ways that aren't monetary. (Send questions to R. Eric Thomas at eric@ or P.O. Box 22474, Philadelphia, PA 19110. Follow him on Instagram and sign up for his weekly newsletter at 2025 Tribune Content Agency, LLC.
Yahoo
2 days ago
- General
- Yahoo
Who killed Debra Sue Moore? Odessa cold case still unsolved after nearly 40 years
ODESSA, Texas (KMID/KPEJ)- In the early hours of May 17, 1986, a scream echoed through the courtyard of what was once called the Viva Apartments in Odessa. Neighbors stepped onto their balconies to find a woman collapsed near the gate, bleeding, barefoot, and yelling for help. The woman was 25-year-old Debra Sue Moore, a mother of two from Monahans. Her overnight bag was still slung over her shoulder when a neighbor performed CPR on her in the doorway of Apartment 51. She was rushed to the hospital, but it was too late. Nearly 40 years later, her case remains unsolved. Debra had arrived at the Viva Apartments around 8:15 p.m. the night before, according to Charles Azelle, the man she was seeing at the time. The two went out to The Brewery with friends and returned to Azelle's apartment in the early hours of the morning. Debra had planned to stay the night. Sometime after 3 a.m., she stepped outside, possibly to retrieve something from her car. Within minutes, she was stabbed near the entrance to the complex. Azelle told police she was screaming his name when she stumbled back inside. On that tragic night, witnesses reported seeing a tall man with shoulder-length brown hair fleeing the scene through a nearby gate. One neighbor described the man grappling with Debra before running. Another saw someone matching the same description moments earlier. Within minutes of Debra's collapse, another woman was confronted, but in her case, the threat was narrowly avoided. Roughly 15 minutes later, a woman working at a nearby 7-Eleven reported what was described as a 'chilling encounter.' A man entered the store and told her, 'If you get into my car, nothing will happen to you. But if not, I can't be responsible for what happens.' She refused, and he sped away in a dark blue Oldsmobile with glass T-tops. Debra's murder wasn't an isolated case. It came during a disturbing string of attacks on women in Odessa that same week, at a time when the city was already gripped by a wave of violence. Just four years earlier, Odessa had been dubbed 'Murder Town, USA' after logging one of the highest per-capita homicide rates in the nation during the oil bust of the early 1980s. While the rate had slowed by 1986, the scars of that era lingered, overwhelmed investigators, limited forensic tools, and a community still shaken by what was once described as random violence. In the days before Debra's death, a UTPB student was abducted at knifepoint, sexually assaulted, and buried under sticks and brush in a field. Miraculously, she survived. Her description of the attacker: a man with long hair and a mustache, again, bore a striking resemblance to the man seen near Debra. That same week, another woman reported being approached by a man with a knife outside an auto body shop. She managed to scare him off by pretending to reach for a gun in her car. The 7-Eleven incident, the attempted abductions, the stabbing, it all pointed to a possible pattern. The man linked to the 7-Eleven attack was soon identified as David Good, a resident of a nearby apartment complex. When police questioned him, Good admitted to attempting the abduction. He told investigators he had planned to rape or kill the store clerk, and acknowledged having violent thoughts toward women. When asked whether he was involved in Debra's murder, Good gave a chilling response: he said he didn't know and suggested hypnosis might reveal the answer. Despite his disturbing statements and his resemblance to multiple witness descriptions, Good was never charged in connection with Debra's death. Investigators said they couldn't firmly establish a timeline. Good refused to put his confession in writing, and any potential evidence tying him to the scene was never publicly disclosed. Years later, David Good died, without ever being definitively ruled in or out as a suspect in Debra's murder. Debra's estranged husband, Tim Moore, was also considered a suspect early on in the investigation. Multiple witnesses described a pattern of abuse in the marriage. According to reports, Tim admitted to past violence but denied involvement in her murder. Officials shared that he also passed a polygraph in 1986. Despite this, detectives have recently voiced concerns about whether key questions, such as whether he had paid someone to hurt her, were ever asked. He has since died. In interviews for The Deck podcast, Debra's son Bert recalled the trauma that shadowed their family. 'She always sang. She was awesome,' he said. 'They just took her away too young.' For the first time in decades, the case has been reopened with fresh eyes and modern tools. Detective Lauren Gonzales, the cold case investigator assigned to Debra's murder, recently submitted evidence for DNA testing. 'She had blood under her nails,' Gonzales said in The Deck. 'Maybe she was trying to fight back. Maybe his DNA is under her nails.' Gonzales also hopes to compare samples from Good and Azelle, if they can be obtained, to rule them out, or in, definitively. When contacted for additional details about the status of DNA testing or the current scope of the investigation, the Odessa Police Department declined to comment. Susan Rogers, CEO of Odessa Crime Stoppers, has worked closely with law enforcement on cold cases for years. 'There were no cell phones, no security footage,' Rogers said. 'You depended entirely on memory and handwritten notes. And those memories fade.' Rogers said both Odessa Police and the Ector County Sheriff's Office have investigators assigned to review unsolved murders like Debra's, but they often juggle active cases as well. 'These cases aren't forgotten,' she said. 'They just take time, resources, and new information to move forward.' Debra Sue Moore was more than just a victim, she was a daughter, a mother of two, and a young woman whose life was stolen far too soon. Nearly four decades have passed, but those who loved her still carry the weight of unanswered questions. If you know something, anything, that could help bring closure, now is the time to come forward. You can submit a tip anonymously to Odessa Crime Stoppers at 432-333-TIPS (8477) or through the P3 Tips app. Be sure to reference case number 86-35818. 'Even the smallest detail can bring justice,' said Susan Rogers, CEO of Odessa Crime Stoppers. 'Sometimes it just takes one person to break a case wide open.' In January 2024, the City of Odessa and Odessa Police Department promoted Debra's story through The Deck podcast, hoping to bring new eyes and new leads to her case. 'Despite decades of efforts by the Odessa Police Department, Debra's case is still unsolved,' city officials wrote. 'Please listen to the episode and share it with your friends and family.' The case remains active. You can listen to the full episode of The Deck: Debra Sue Moore on all major podcast platforms or click here to listen now. Copyright 2025 Nexstar Media, Inc. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten, or redistributed.
