Latest news with #sociallife
CNET
3 hours ago
- General
- CNET
Stop Taking So Long to Reply to Texts. You're Sabotaging Your Friendships
Depending on who you ask, texting is either an easy way to keep in touch or an overbearing item on an ever-growing to-do list. What's convenient for one person may be a burden to another, which can cause strains on some relationships. So, how long can someone go without texting you back before they end up on the friendship chopping block? Not very long, if you ask me. It might come across as harsh, but I believe healthy relationships are sustained by timely communication, instead of consistently leaving someone on Read or Delivered for a week. It becomes practically impossible to coordinate hangouts or share life updates if someone can't bother to respond to your messages within a reasonable window, or otherwise call you if that's how they prefer to chat. Friends who take days to reply -- if they ever do -- come off as indifferent and uninterested, especially when they don't arrange alternative ways to catch up. You might start to wonder how much they actually value your time and effort, and why they don't prioritize communicating with you. Repeated offenses can make it tempting to throw in the towel and invest your energy elsewhere. How long can you go without texting someone back? I'll first acknowledge my personal bias here: I have always enjoyed texting. It's been my preferred method of communication since I got my first phone at 13 years old and discovered the magic of talking to my friends anytime, anywhere. It's no coincidence that some of my closest friends tend to be people with whom I regularly text. There's a sense of familiarity that comes from sharing your day-to-day experiences and thoughts. It's also a fun way to engage in banter and share relatable memes and videos. And before I upset anyone -- if I haven't already -- I'll again acknowledge that for some people, texting isn't enjoyable. But I still think people have a responsibility to communicate clearly and frequently with loved ones if they hope to maintain those relationships, whether it's a text, phone call or in-person meetup. So, what's an acceptable window of time for someone to text you back? Despite how unaccommodating I may come off in that frank introduction, I do like to give people chances. If someone takes days to reply to me the first time, or simply never gets back to me, I let it go. But if it happens again, that's a strike. I believe you should always text someone back within a 24-hour period -- notwithstanding special circumstances like travel or illness, etc. Repeatedly taking several days to reply is not only inconsiderate, it also just kills the vibe. Why do I care if you laughed at a meme I sent you five days ago? At that point, I won't even remember what I reached out to you about. And if I'm asking you about going to an event and you only respond after it's over, that unlocks a whole other level of annoyance. I believe the time and effort you invest in friendships includes replying to texts within a reasonable period (as long as your friend isn't bombarding your inbox, of course). So if someone continuously takes days to reply, I take it as my sign to stop trying, and to put that energy into the friends who won't leave me waiting. A more personal way to stay in touch As a teenager, my friends and I would text each other around the clock, sending a steady stream of messages and photos about anything and everything, most of it totally inconsequential. (Being young and unemployed made this all the easier.) But as we got older and busier, and as social media began eating up our free time, text messages were largely supplanted by posting and consuming content on platforms like Facebook and Instagram. Our digital activity became less personal, more performative and less conducive to maintaining relationships. Social media gives the false impression of keeping up with someone without actually talking to them, so relationships tend to fracture. Most people have witnessed the awkwardness of someone not replying to your text for days, but ceaselessly posting on social media. Time and energy goes into both activities, and choosing to bypass personal interactions for more public-facing ones can prevent you from feeling a genuine connection to the people who care to reach out to you. Taking 30 seconds to reply to a text could be the difference between making and breaking a meaningful relationship. While phone calls and in-person meetups are undoubtedly the best ways to have an in-depth conversation with someone, finding a time that works for both parties can be a challenge, given how increasingly hectic our lives have become. Texting can be a comparatively low-lift way to build a true sense of camaraderie and connection. So, the next time you think it's not a big deal to leave someone on Read or Delivered, maybe reconsider what your actions (or lack thereof) may convey.
Daily Mail
22-07-2025
- Entertainment
- Daily Mail
Molly-Mae Hague complains she hasn't done 'one fun thing' this summer and admits she has 'no life' - despite sharing recent summer snaps including plush holiday and Wimbledon outing
Molly-Mae Hague has complained she hasn't done 'one fun thing this summer' as she admitted she has 'no life' in her recent YouTube vlog. The influencer, 26, chatted to her sister Zoe in the video as she confessed: 'I will get to the end of summer without having done one fun thing. 'Zoe I haven't socialised once. I am going to get to the end of this summer, I haven't done one social fun thing.' She added: 'I haven't a life. I haven't a life. It's not good.' Her sister Zoe, 28, agreed: 'That's not good. Yeah you do need to start having a bit of one.' Yet her rant appeared to be oddly timed as just hours later Molly took to Instagram to share a latest summer roundup. Molly included snaps from her recent glamorous trip to Wimbledon as well as days out with her daughter Bambi. Yet the star went on to explain her only social outings were either for work or parenting related. She continued: 'Yeah summer will end and I won't have done one fun social thing. Fun and social thing for me is me and Taylor with the kids. 'When me and Taylor vlogged in London last week that was riveting for me so that was my fun social thing. 'It's all kids related, if it's not work and kids I am not doing anything. It's not good. People going for a drink with their friends or to a beer garden. Even last night you went for food with your friends at Cibo and put a nice outfit on. 'Oh my gosh I don't remember the last time I did my hair and makeup and put an outfit on for something that wasn't work related. 'I don't do anything. Lets normalise it. For the girls that are going to get to the end of summer and not done one fun thing.' However Molly did accept her recent London trip was a fun social occasion as she added: 'No that's a lie because people are going to say "You went to London in your last vlog and had a ball" and I did.' It comes after Molly shared her candid complaints about a recent £86,000 motorhome family holiday to the Isle of Man - after Tommy Fury said their daughter Bambi shouldn't be spoilt with five star trips. In her latest YouTube vlog Molly-Mae opened up about some of the more difficult parts of the holiday including navigating travel delays with a toddler. The family were travelling on a swanky Elddis Avalon 255 motorhome which retails at £86,995, after Tommy insisted their daughter Bambi shouldn't be 'spoilt' with 'five star hotels and business class flights' when they go away on family holidays Yet in her latest vlog, Molly-Mae revealed the trip had been blighted with delays, leaving Bambi 'overtired and overstimulated'. She explained: 'Tommy has bought a motorhome and we spent our first weekend in the motorhome this weekend. 'Obviously, being us, we went in feet first and decided to go to the Isle of Man. 'Tommy's family were spending the weekend in the Isle of Man. I was feeling spontaneous so we literally booked the ferry to the Isle of Man an hour before we needed to leave. 'We'd never used the motorhome before, we needed to pack it up, sort Bambi, I just had this wave of 'you only live once, have a bit of fun'. 'Bambi doesn't need to be so perfectly routine every day, she's not a newborn anymore. 'I've got so stuck in my ways with the fact that her routine is her routine and I don't really steer away from it. 'I'm not gonna feel bad for that because that is what works for me and that is what works for Bambi and Tommy, so that's fine.' She then added of when things started to go wrong: 'So anyway, booked the ferry, packed the motorhome up and nearly didn't make the ferry but that's another story and then there was a two hour delay. 'This ferry, which was already gonna get us in at 11:30pm, which was already severely triggering me because Bambi goes to bed at 7pm, was not fine. It was giving me a prime example as to why the routine works for us. 'It was one of those moments where strangers come up to you and are like 'can I help? Is there anything I can do?' 'She was screaming that much for four hours straight. 'The boat basically had a malfunction and it wouldn't move for like two hours so we had a huge delay. 'She was so, so, so overtired and overstimulated - Bambi is so routine, she is the opposite of flexible.' And when they arrived things continued to go downhill, as she said: 'We managed to get to the Isle of Man at 1:30am in the morning. 'We didn't know where we were, what we were doing, we were going to a different campsite to Tommy's family. It was just a lot. 'We had to make our bed out of this sofa, I was like 'I'm really out of my depth, I'm struggling'. 'The next day, Bambi was so tired, she was just screaming, literally screaming, so, so unhappy. 'Me and Tommy were looking at each other like 'what were we thinking?. I was having a breakdown.' She went on in the vlog: 'Bear in mind this motorhome of Tommy's is his pride and joy, he's obsessed with it…I kid you not, the next day he was like 'I'm selling it, the minute we get home I'm putting it up for sale, I hate this motorhome.' 'It wasn't even the motorhome's fault. For our first time, stupid move.' They even considered getting an early ferry home but once they met up with Tyson Fury and his wife Paris, things improved. She said: 'We were actually going to get on a ferry that day to come home because we were so out of our depth, we couldn't do it. 'But then, when we met up with them, we were like 'no, we're gonna stick it out, we can do this.'
Yahoo
24-06-2025
- Entertainment
- Yahoo
How to Make Friends After Moving to a New City? Try, Then Try Again
Making new friends as an adult can feel a little like dating — awkward small talk, ghosted group texts, and the occasional spark of real connection. And it can be especially tough if you've just moved to a new city and need to completely start over. In this excerpt from How I Found Myself in the Midwest: A Memoir of Reinvention, author Steve Grove dives into the weird, wonderful world of grown-up friendship. After moving back to his home state of Minnesota, he found himself rebuilding his social life from scratch — with all the cringey moments and unexpected wins that come with it. His story is a warm, witty reminder that it's never too late to find your people. 'Do you think it's too early to text him back?' I asked my wife Mary sheepishly. We'd just returned from a holiday party hosted by one of the families in the kids' elementary school, and I had what I thought was a good conversation in the kitchen with the dad, Kevin. He was a transplant from Oregon by way of New York, and was working as a successful musician. Concert posters from his past shows hung on the walls of their home, and a piano was parked in the middle of the living room. He seemed very cool. I wondered if he might be a potential friend. Gracefully, Mary treated my question with sincerity. 'Let's see, it's been two days . . . I think you're okay to text him.' I carefully texted a thank you, wishing him a happy holiday and vaguely suggesting we get together in the new year. Then I waited. Two hours later, he replied back warmly, remembering our conversation and agreeing to my faint invitation to meet up sometime. He even included three emojis. My heart jumped. 'He wrote back!' I sang to Mary. She laughed and gave me a hug. 'Congratulations, honey!' I blushed and put my phone down, plotting my next move. Finding new friends in your forties, especially in a new community, can feel a lot like dating. You don't have a lot of time, there are awkward barriers to cross, and truly getting to know someone takes vulnerability and commitment precisely when those things are being demanded of you by your family and job, too. Experts estimate it takes more than two hundred hours for a stranger to become a close friend. That's a lot of time and effort that's hard to come by, given the modern demands of adulthood. Staying close with friends from other chapters of life was enriching, but it wasn't the same as having friends in my neighborhood. Plus I had recently moved back to my home state of Minnesota in my 40s, where most people stay and keep their friends from childhood, and don't always have time for new friends. Moving near family had been powerful, but for Minnesota to feel like my chosen home, I knew I needed a chosen family, too. I needed friends. When we'd first moved to the state, Mary and I had gotten off to a good start, hosting barbecues and inviting people over often. A year in, we felt like we were making some progress. But then the pandemic hit, grounding everything to a halt. Instead, I retreated to groups of friends from previous stages of my life, keeping in touch over group texts. Staying close with friends from other chapters of life was enriching, but it wasn't the same as having friends in my neighborhood. Why did that seem so much harder? As I pulled through a workout on the rowing machine one morning, I listened to a podcast that referenced the acclaimed book Bowling Alone, which I'd read 20 years earlier. In it, the political scientist Robert Putnam coined the phrase 'social capital' and charted its decline in the twentieth century. He used the metaphor that participation in bowling leagues had declined by 40 percent since 1980, while overall bowling had risen by 10 percent, to show an American community that was spending less time joining activities and making new friends, and more time doing stuff on their own. Putnam cited many factors that led to a decline in social capital, from urban sprawl, television, and two-career families, to time and money pressures. A few decades later, we seemed to have only gotten worse. Putnam debunks the idea that we're more isolated because we're just too busy. Modern American adults spend on average ten hours a day with media, five of it with television. We've just replaced time we had spent with others with being alone. While I may have been rowing alone, I wasn't the only one. Many Americans report that making new friends has grown more difficult, especially since Covid. A recent survey reported only half of Americans are satisfied with the number of friends they have. Men seem to be in worse shape than women, with 15 percent saying they had no close friends at all, five times higher than in 1990. One Saturday morning I got in my car and typed in the address of a coffee shop across town. I tried to calm my nerves. A few weeks earlier, I'd signed up online for a Meetup group called Break the Bubble. The description online seemed targeted exactly at transplants like me: 'Break the Bubble was created to solve a big problem: How do you make new friends in the Twin Cities? Making friends here is hard. We're changing that.' When I arrived at the meetup, just ten minutes after the posted starting time, fifty people were milling about in a large open space just off to the side of a coffee bar. Jon, a transplant to Minnesota himself, started organizing the group six years ago. Having grown up in South Bend, Indiana, as a self-described introvert, he explained, 'Some people treat it as a place to meet lifelong friends, others treat it like a college party for adults.' I stuck a name tag on my shirt and walked over to a group of three men about my age, gathered next to a pillar with cups of coffee in hand. I introduced myself and asked what brought them to the meetup. Bennett, a mustached software engineer who'd recently moved out of his parents' house and into an apartment, was careful with his words: 'I'm just trying to come here and talk to some people.' Later, I saw him sit down in a leather chair and strike up a conversation with someone else. Watching Bennett push himself to meet new people was inspiring; I hadn't known quite what to expect, but being around others who were looking for community just like me made the world feel less lonely. As I drove home, I left encouraged. While I didn't leave with any new best friends, maybe more important wasn't what I'd gained but what I'd lost: the embarrassment I had about struggling to meet new people. Everyone at that meetup was searching, just like me. The places we call home are varied: Our physical neighborhoods, our virtual social networks, our schools, our community networks, and more are all places we find connection. Yet though we have more ways to build community than ever before, it often feels like we're more isolated, too. I was finding that it takes deliberate action and a dash of courage to break through the bubble and meet other people. But once I did, I found others just as eager as me to make friends. As I stopped telling myself I was too busy and started reaching out to those around me, our community was starting to feel more like home. One night, I took a leap and organized a pickleball night at a local brewery with some new friends. The night we all planned to meet, a big snowstorm hit. Giant, wet snowflakes fell from the sky and the roads were covered in snow. But everyone showed up. They all wanted the same thing I did — a chance to connect with a chosen community, and to share our lives with each other. Steve Grove is the CEO and publisher of the Minnesota Star Tribune. Previously he worked as Minnesota's commissioner of economic development, and as an executive at Google and YouTube. Excerpted from How I Found Myself in the Midwest: A Memoir of Reinvention by Steve Grove. Copyright © 2025 by Steve Grove. Reprinted by permission of Simon & Schuster, Inc. The post How to Make Friends After Moving to a New City? Try, Then Try Again appeared first on Katie Couric Media.
Daily Mail
19-06-2025
- Lifestyle
- Daily Mail
'My wife wants to retire so she can spend time with me. I can't think of anything worse': I can see straight through this letter-writer's motivation, says CAROLINE WEST-MEADS. This is my brutal answer
Q I'm 65 and retired three years ago. Our children have moved out so now it's just my wife and me at home. Since retiring I have formed a very nice social life, and enjoy spending weekends with her. I also find it interesting in the evenings hearing about her busy job – she has a good career. My wife has now told me that she wants to retire in the next six to 12 months. She says that this means we can start planning all the things we have talked about doing together.
Telegraph
13-06-2025
- Health
- Telegraph
Merle Weiner: ‘Opening my home to people with dementia makes my heart sing'
Three times a week, on Mondays, Wednesdays and Thursdays, I open my home to small groups of five people living with dementia early to moderate dementia. It's a different approach to dementia care; in the comfort of my home, nobody feels overwhelmed by a large group and it feels like a day and lunch with friends. What happens in each group varies and is bespoke to the preferences and personalities of each group. Activities can include craft work, painting, baking, playing dominoes or Scrabble, or even sitting and having a long chat. Quizzes are also very popular, especially ones where I ask questions about nursery rhymes (which everyone seems to remember) such as 'where was Humpty Dumpty sitting?' and we all merrily start reciting them together. Each group, of four or five people, comes on the same day every week, so it's a familiar routine with the same faces in a comforting home environment. They know they will be spending time with friends and look forward to it. It's not just about giving their families or carers a break (although I know that these six-hour windows of respite are hugely appreciated), it's about allowing people with the condition to still have a fulfilling social life. I began working as a dementia host several years ago when I first heard about The Filo Project, an award-winning not-for-profit organisation providing small group care days for people living with early to moderate dementia. It's like a home from home experience. My passion for working in the aged care field goes back 20 years, when I obtained my Aged Care diploma in Australia, after leaving South Africa in 2005. I'd settled in England when my own mother was diagnosed with Alzheimer's at the age of 69. The changes in her personality crept in slowly: initially she developed OCD and would spend hours washing her hands obsessively, fretting about whether they were clean. She was living with my sister at the time, but when my once gentle and sweet-natured mum became violent and threatening towards my sister's young children, heartbreakingly we knew she needed to go into a home. I would call each month from the other side of the world, and while she'd lost the ability to talk by then, the care home workers described how her whole face lit up as they held the phone to her ear and I regaled her with my news. I liked thinking it was bringing some comfort to her. My beautiful mum lived a long time with the disease – 21 years – so I know how devastating Alzheimer's can be. I joined The Filo Project to try and make a positive difference to people living with dementia, realising how isolated and lonely they felt. Caring for people living with dementia is a privilege, and every person's dementia journey is different. It's important to know that the person living with dementia is still a living human being, although the brain is functioning differently. Everyone should feel comfortable and safe, amongst friends who love and care for each other. Our clients vary in age – our oldest being 103, and the youngest is 68. The sad thing about dementia is that is doesn't discriminate when it comes to age. In my groups, my clients are very happy to talk about the past. They enjoy reminiscing and going down memory lane together and I love listening to them. We enjoy celebrating special occasions. For VE Day, we decorated the lounge, made cupcakes with the Union Jack on and had a party. Christmas time is also very special. Some clients even come to me on Christmas Day and we enjoy a traditional Christmas, where we do a lot of singing, play charades and finish the day by watching the King's speech. We never put on the television (unless there's a royal wedding or coronation, which we will all be glued to) instead we play cards games or dominoes together, leaving all the cards open so we can talk about what to play next. Our sessions are lively and filled with joy, and everyone adores my elderly spaniel, Chloe, who also acts as an unofficial therapy dog. We form lasting friendships with each other and people's families too. I have one client who's been coming to me for five years now, every week. So it's devastating when the disease progresses beyond being moderate, as the scheme isn't suitable for those in the advanced stages of Alzheimer's. Hosts like myself aren't able to work with clients who are in a wheelchair or need personal care sadly. But we make the most of our time together. Caring is a tough job for loved ones, so I see my role as supporting the whole family as much as my client. The more we talk about dementia, the more awareness we generate, and talking about dementia should start at a young age. Even chatting to young people about why they shouldn't be scared if Granny sometimes acts a little strangely. She's still their granny, it's just that her brain isn't functioning as it should. I'm wearing my Forget Me Not Appeal badge this month in recognition of the outstanding work carried out by Alzheimer's Society, in memory of my beautiful mum, and for everyone who has lost a loved one to dementia. If you enjoy the company of older people, are kind, gentle, with a sense of humour and keen to make a difference to someone who feels lonely and isolated, why not consider becoming a host for The Filo Project? Experience isn't necessary; hosts work between the hours of 9am to 5pm on hosting days. It's essential to have a driver's licence and a five-door car, easy access into your home, with no more than a few steps, a downstairs toilet, and loose carpets or rugs need to be put away. A host's salary is very good, and we have ongoing training and support. Having seen how much clients get from coming to my home I'd love more people to join us and for them to experience how life-enriching it can be. When I decided to open my home up to others, I had no idea how much it would open up my heart, too. As told to Susanna Galton Merle is supporting Alzheimer's Society's Forget Me Not Appeal, which funds life-changing support and groundbreaking research for the UK's biggest killer – dementia. Donate at
