Commentary: Stand or sit? Sing or scream? Concert etiquette should not be so difficult

CNA

26-05-2025

SINGAPORE: Attending a concert used to be straightforward: Prepare your outfit, pack your essentials and make sure you've got your ticket for the right date.
Today, attending a concert also apparently means navigating the risk of offending someone else or even a physical altercation with them – just because both of you disagree on how to enjoy the show.
Last week, Lady Gaga performed four high-octane shows in Singapore – the only Asia stop in her ongoing Mayhem tour. Critics and fans alike have showered praises on her raucous music, powerful vocals and energetic dancing, accented with stunning sets and costume changes.
However, compliments for the pop star seem to have been overshadowed by online mayhem in the form of several viral social media posts complaining not about Gaga herself, but about concert attendees.
Many complained that the crowd was 'too dead', with not enough people jumping, dancing and screaming. Ironically, others complained that fellow attendees were jumping, dancing and screaming too much, resulting in blocked views at the all-seated shows.
Several were upset about others raising their phones to film much of the concert, further obstructing others' view even if they remained seated.
There were even a few videos of concertgoers arguing with each other over whether they should sit or stand, some so heatedly it seemed that they might come to blows.
These complaints are not new; in fact, they often resurface at every major concert in Singapore. But for all the 'concert drama' we've seen in recent years, we seem to be no closer to answering the questions: What is good concert etiquette? And is there a right way to enjoy a concert?
HOW DO YOU ENJOY A CONCERT?
The average concert crowd of today is arguably much more diversified than that of decades past.
Thanks to the internet, global superstars like Lady Gaga generate much fanfare across more demographic lines.
When they drop into town, their shows attract everybody – from their biggest, most dedicated devotees, to casual fans familiar with their mainstream hits but not necessarily much else, and even including curious onlookers who just want to know what the hype is about (and have the spare cash to find out).
With such a varied crowd, opinions would naturally diverge about how to enjoy a concert.
For some, enjoying a concert is about participating enthusiastically by singing and dancing along. For others, it's about being comfortable while they watch artists perform, staying seated with much less physical exertion.
For some, recording the show is crucial, so they can revisit it long after leaving the stadium. Others prefer to be 'in the moment', focusing on fully experiencing their favourite songs rather than diverting concentration to their phone's video capture.
And, seeing as there aren't any formal rules or expectations enshrined in law or any other official text, these clashes of opinion can sometimes result in more serious interpersonal clashes.
GO WITH THE VIBES
As a seasoned concert-goer, here's how I see it.
There are different parameters for 'good' audience behaviour, depending on what type of concert you're going to.
For example, at Laufey's concert last September, it felt appropriate to sit quietly while the Icelandic jazz-pop singer crooned about heartbreak – no screaming, and certainly no vigorous dancing.
On the other hand, during Taylor Swift's Eras Tour shows in March 2024, it only made sense to jump along to the pop icon's up-tempo bops and sing along to her catchy hooks – and then take a seat for her slower, stripped-back ballads.
But again, this is largely based on 'vibes'. There's no definitive right or wrong – which makes concert-goers who aggressively insist that others act a certain way – the way they personally would prefer – feel icky.
Perhaps some of this entitlement stems from the fact that concert tickets are becoming more and more challenging to procure these days, especially for the biggest, most popular acts.
Gone are the days when we could simply stroll to the nearest ticketing booth; nowadays it's standard procedure to expect a stressful, anxiety-inducing battle in digital queues with millions of others.
Rising ticket prices further complicate the issue – everyone who paid for a ticket should have the same right to enjoy the concert however they want.
WHEN OPINIONS COLLIDE
Nevertheless, some things are basic etiquette, like not screaming at the top of your lungs all throughout every song – most of us paid to hear the artist sing, please.
But what about grey areas like standing in a seated concert? If you want to stand but the folks behind you prefer to sit, do you have no choice but to compromise on your idea of fun and sit as well so as not to block their view?
For many East Asian acts, seating requirements are common, but to keep the energy up, fans can expect choreographed crowd engagement moments built into the show. K-pop fans will be familiar with fan chants, where audiences shout specific phrases at certain points in songs, as if performing with their idols.
In some countries such as Japan, concert crowds are expected to stay seated unless the performer says everyone can stand. Even shouting is not encouraged, which could seem overly restrictive to many.
I'm not suggesting we start imposing such drastic rules in Singapore. But on my own part, whenever I attend a concert, I make it a point to ask my seatmates if they are alright with me getting to my feet for some songs.
It may not be strictly necessary, but I do it anyway out of courtesy to those I'm sharing the space with. (Bonus: Most of the time, I end up making friends when I do so.)
Often, my seatmates admit feeling uncertain themselves about whether they could stand during the show if others did not.
In my experience, a simple conversation such as this can do much to give both myself and my temporary companions the confidence to enjoy ourselves to the fullest, however we feel comfortable doing so and without worrying that we'll tread on someone else's toes (metaphorically speaking).
Perhaps a better way to manage such dilemmas is for concert venues to designate sections that are strictly seated, and other sections for more flexible seated/standing options, depending on the crowd. After all, there are various reasons why many attendees would prefer not to stand at all – old age, for instance, or an injury.