I've done what most women wouldn't dare – I had ‘Barbie butt' op just before my wedding and it's saved my life
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MATILDA Ahdrian had her rectum removed and her anus sewn shut to save her life - a major operation that's been dubbed 'Barbie Butt'.
"I don't have a bum hole anymore - just like Barbie!" the 28-year-old who lives in Gothenburg, Sweden, said.
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Matilda Ahdrian spent her teenage years in agony, while she suffered from ulcerative colitis
Credit: Cover Images
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The 28-year-old has since had an operation to remove her rectum and entire colon permanently
Credit: Cover Images
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'It sounds crazy, but honestly, it saved my life,' she says
Credit: Cover Images
After years of suffering from a painful bowel disease, the fashion project manager chose surgery that also left her with a permanent stoma.
"It sounds crazy, but honestly, it saved my life," she explained.
Matilda was 15 when she was diagnosed with ulcerative colitis - an inflammatory bowel disease (IBD).
Around 296,000 people in the UK have been diagnosed with ulcerative colitis, according to the NHS – that's about one in every 227.
In Sweden, studies suggest about 100,000 people have IBD, including ulcerative colitis and Crohn's, which adds up to around one in every 100 people.
And while it can develop at any age, it's most often spotted between the ages of 15 and 25.
This meant Matilda's teenage years were consumed by pain, hospital visits, fevers, and an increasingly fragile body.
"I had flare-ups, constant bleeding, cramping, and this unbearable urgency to be near a toilet," Matilda said.
"It ruled my life. I tried every medication, but nothing worked," she added.
By 17, doctors had "no choice" but to rush Matilda into emergency surgery, remove her entire colon and give her a stoma bag - an opening in the tummy that allows waste to leave the body into a pouch.
I had to have 'Barbie butt' op to stitch my rear end shut - I can't control my bowels anymore but I'm free (1)
"It was such a relief," she said.
"I was sick, I had a 41-degree fever - I just wanted to get my life back."
Contrary to expectations, the stoma didn't derail Matilda's teenage dreams – it revived them.
"At first, I panicked," she said.
"I thought I'd never wear tight clothes again, or go to prom, or even graduate feeling confident.
"But I did it all. The stoma gave me my freedom back. I could live again."
Thirteen years later, the stoma she once feared has a name - Gunnar - and has become a permanent part of her life.
'I knew it was time'
But it wasn't until December 2024, just five months before her wedding, that Matilda decided to take the final step.
It involved undergoing what's known in medical terms as a proctectomy - the removal of her rectum and anus - making her stoma permanent.
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She had a stoma fitted as a teenager – a procedure that gave her her life back
Credit: Cover Images
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She encourages other women worried about love or dating after stoma surgery to own their truth
Credit: Cover Images
She said: "I had been dealing with a disconnected but still inflamed rectum for over a decade.
"It caused bleeding, cramping, so many problems and eventually, I developed a fistula too."
"I knew it was time," she added. "It was either this, or risk everything right before my wedding. So I said, let's go Barbie."
Since then, she's turned her health battle into a message of empowerment, sharing every raw, funny, and honest moment online - leaks, scars, and all.
Still healing from her surgery, Matilda has admitted it hasn't all been glamorous.
What is inflammatory bowel disease?
Inflammatory bowel disease (IBD) is a long-term health condition that causes severe tummy pain and diarrhoea.
The two main types of IBD are Crohn's disease and ulcerative colitis.
The main symptoms include: Diarrhoea that lasts longer than four weeks
Tummy pain
Blood or mucus (clear slime) in your poo
Bleeding from your bottom
Feeling tired all the time
Losing weight without trying
There are a range of treatments available to help manage symptoms.
These can include steroids and other medications, as well as surgery to remove part of your bowel.
It is not clear what causes IBD, but you are more likely to be diagnosed if a close relative has it.
Research conducted by Crohn's & Colitis UK in 2022 suggests one in every 123 people in the UK has IBD.
Source: NHS
"It's been four months and my wound still hasn't fully healed," she explained.
"It drains, it aches, and it tests your patience.
"But I keep reminding myself I did this for my future. For a life without pain. And for my wedding."
"Now I get to walk down the aisle without shame, and hopefully no pain or fear. I've never felt more like myself."
'The right person will love you - hole or no hole'
Speaking of the big day, Matilda is counting down the weeks until she marries her supportive fiancé, who's been by her side through every hospital stay and tough decision.
"He's my rock," she said, "we talked everything through, and he said he didn't want me to struggle anymore."
She added: "He makes me feel beautiful even when I feel at my lowest."
Matilda says her confidence hasn't always been this high, but learning to embrace her body was the key.
"Your stoma doesn't define you. It's a part of you, not you," she explained.
Matilda encourages other women worried about love, dating, or marriage after stoma surgery to own their truth.
"If someone has a problem with your stoma, they're not the one,' she said. "The right person will love you for you - hole or no hole!"
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