'My friend is forcing me to babysit her kids on holiday - should I cancel the trip?'
A woman is concerned that her pal is going to force her into babysitting duties when they go on holiday together
Scots heading on holiday this summer will be counting down the days until they board the plane. Sun, sea, and relaxation awaits - well, for most people. For others, the thought of more responsibility is daunting.
Vacations are a great time to spend quality time with loved ones, but sometimes the lines can get blurred, especially with friends. We want to leave all our obligations at home - but what if they interrupt that?
This is the case for one woman, who is going abroad with her friend soon. But there is just one problem - despite wanting to soak up the sun, she feels like she is going to be forced into taking care of her friend's children.
Taking to an advice forum on mumsnet, the lady, who is a single mother herself, explained that her friend and her husband - who have three young children - came to stay with her for a break over half term recently.
The friend's husband doesn't help much around the house, which forced the poster to help care for her friend's children by feeding, washing, and entertaining them, and even babysitting so her friend and hubby could go out.
Although the children are "lovely" and she enjoys spending time with them, the poster admitted they are "hard work". When the family left, she was left feeling "taken for granted" after failing to receive as much as a 'thank you'.
But a new problem has entered the conversation.
"My current issue is they have booked to go on holiday to the same hotel as me and my family in the summer for two weeks," the mother shared.
"They've made a few comments about how it will be great to have help with the children and be able to have date nights. I was looking forward to a relaxing time with my adult kids. We really need a break and some relaxation.
"How do I manage this? Like when the kids want me to play in the pool with them or when they expect me to babysit in the evenings?
"I'd be willing to babysit one night so they can have a night out but I don't want them to assume this will happen every night, as this is more or less what happened last time. Am I being unreasonable?"
Fellow parents responded passionately to the woman's dilemma.
"I would cancel the holiday," one stated dramatically.
A second said they would take the same course of action: "I would make an excuse and change the holiday. In the same position two years ago, my oldest son said it ruined his holiday. Wish I had put my kids first."
Another chipped in: "If you are willing to babysit one night, ask them now to confirm which night they would want as you will be busy with your adult children and want to get plans in place - do this BEFORE you go away.
"Any queries from the kids, point them to their parents - loudly and obnoxiously if you have to so that everyone else is aware that they are not your children. Any hints or subtlety will just be ignored so you need to be very very clear."
A fourth agreed: "No need to be subtle or diplomatic.
"Just be upfront and tell them before you go away that you are looking forward to a well earned, relaxing holiday.
"That unfortunately does not include helping them with their children or babysitting for date nights."
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