Ukrainian commander's final dispatch: ‘I had hoped my service and sacrifices would be enough, but they haven't'

Irish Times

15 hours ago

Today is the 1,199th day since
Russia
's full-scale
invasion
of
Ukraine
, and this is my last of six columns for The Irish Times. I'm sorry I cannot provide a definitive conclusion. The war shows no sign of ending. At best we hope for a temporary ceasefire.
We nonetheless received a tremendous morale boost six days ago, when more than 100 first-person view (FPV) drones smuggled into Russia by the Ukrainian intelligence service, SBU, damaged or destroyed 40 bombers at bases from Siberia to the Kola peninsula. The SBU estimates we caused $7 billion in damage and destroyed 34 per cent of Russia's strategic aircraft.
It was the most important Ukrainian victory of the war, and it was stupendous. These aircraft have been used by Moscow to terrorise Ukrainian cities. They are part of Russia's nuclear capability, so the attack was also a lesson to western allies who've been intimidated by
Vladimir Putin
's threats of escalation.
It was a humiliating blow to Putin. One wonders what other special operations the SBU is planning. On June 3rd it staged its
third attack
on the Kerch Bridge, Putin's prestige project, inaugurated in 2018 to link Russia to occupied Crimea.
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Operation Spider's Web gave us a surge of joy comparable to the sinking of the
Moskva
, the flagship of Russia's Black Sea fleet, in 2022, or the Ukrainian
incursion
into the Kursk region of Russia last August. It may provide some respite to Ukrainian cities, and I hope it will change the narrative. Our allies always overestimate Russia's strength and underestimate ours.
One of the principal tasks of the drone platoon I command, the Hellish Hornets, is to designate front-line targets for FPV drones. Based on our reconnaissance, drone pilots kill a couple of Russian infantrymen daily. We observe Russian bases and logistics farther behind the front line, but our infantry are often unable to strike them because shell hunger – the chronic shortage of artillery shells – continues.
The SBU programmed the same type of drones, costing just a few thousand dollars each and with a range of 15-20km, to attack Russian aircraft worth hundreds of millions of dollars, on airfields thousands of kilometres away. Tiny drones were packed into hidden compartments in the ceilings of containers driven by Trojan trucks. The lids opened and drones flew out in attack mode. I don't know all the details, but I certainly agree with the British defence commentator who said the operation shows that Ukraine's armed forces are the most innovative in the world.
In the Oval Office last February 28th, Donald Trump
taunted
President
Volodymyr Zelenskiy
with the words 'You don't have the cards.' Zelenskiy held his cards very close to his chest while he supervised the planning of Spider's Web over 18 months. Ukrainian memes and videos mock Trump now.
In the weeks before Spider's Web, the Russians continued to ratchet up their bombardment of Ukraine. On the eve of our drone attack on Russian aircraft, they fired 472 Shahed-type attack drones at Ukraine – 100 more than the previous nightly record – and seven ballistic missiles.
US president Donald Trump, right, and Ukrainian president Volodymyr Zelenskiy, in the Oval Office on February 28th. Photograph: Doug Mills/The New York Times
Near our house in a front-line town, a civilian was killed and several were wounded. Last week our previous billet, which I decided to abandon three months ago, was obliterated. On May 28th, Makar, a middle-aged soldier from my company, was burned over 80 per cent of his body when a Russian glide bomb set fire to his unit's house. He's in hospital in Dnipro and we don't know if he will survive.
A prisoner exchange was the only tangible result of talks between Russia and Ukraine in Istanbul on May 16th. The second session on June 2nd lasted only an hour but reached an agreement to exchange all prisoners under the age of 25, all who are seriously ill or wounded and 6,000 bodies.
It was moving to see the famished, exhausted but joyous prisoners who were
freed in May
. The Russians had earlier tortured them psychologically by telling them they were going to be exchanged, then driving them back to prison. They didn't believe they were free until they saw Ukrainian flags and cheering people. The first thing they did was to call their family and say, 'Mom, I'm home!' I saw grown men crying.
Trump has told European leaders that Putin isn't ready for peace because he thinks he's winning the war. Putin demands the lifting of sanctions, the disarmament and permanent neutrality of Ukraine, and even more Ukrainian territory than he has already seized. He wants unconditional surrender. We cannot accept that.
Sometimes I think Ukraine is like a dog on a chain. The dog is fed enough not to die, but it is still chained. The owner of the dog is the West.
I cannot see a path to a just, negotiated peace. We're preparing our society for the fact that the war won't end for as long as Russia exists in its present form. Putin is a dictator, but his death would not end the war, because Russia is more than Putin; it's a police state run by an intelligence service.
Lt Yulia Mykytenko in Donetsk. Photograph: Julia Kochetova
We've spent too much time and too many resources speculating about Trump, hoping he'll change. He kept threatening Putin with sanctions, but he never followed through and now he seems to have walked away from the conflict. I had to laugh when I read his May 26th post: 'I've always had a very good relationship with Vladimir Putin of Russia, but something has happened to him. He has gone absolutely CRAZY! He is needlessly killing a lot of people ...'
Two US senators travelled to Kyiv to see Zelenskiy last weekend. I was encouraged by Sen Lindsey Graham's speech about a new package of sanctions that would badly hurt Russia. The sanctions Bill that Graham is promoting would impose 500 per cent tariffs on all countries who buy hydrocarbons from Russia. Graham is a Republican, and he won't bring the Bill to a vote unless Trump supports it. It's a long shot, but I need to have hope.
It turns out the Europeans have paid Russia more for hydrocarbons since 2022 than they have given Ukraine in aid. They help fund the war by buying Russian gas and oil. Europe has not organised its defence industry, and the promise of a Franco-British security force is all but forgotten.
Yet we have no option other than to trust the Europeans. They could be reliable allies if they wanted to be. They must decide if they want to be remembered as strong leaders who prevented a larger conflagration, or as appeasers.
Putin may not want a ceasefire, but I think he overestimates his troops. On our section of the front line, the Russians hardly ever use armour, because we destroy it with FPVs. There are interviews with Russian soldiers on Telegram and YouTube and even on Russian propaganda channels. They say it was a mistake to join up for money. They say they are treated badly by their commanders and warn, 'Don't go there because you are going to die'. They are demoralised and they no longer see the point of the war.
Zelenskiy said recently that Russia was recruiting 40,000-50,000 soldiers a month, compared with about 25,000 for Ukraine. They have to recruit a lot more because they lose a lot more, attacking all the time, all along the front line. In military academy they taught us that you lose three times as many soldiers on the offensive, but my impression is the Russians are losing five times as many as we are, because they don't hide or protect their soldiers.
Ukrainian soldiers are exhausted, but we still know what we are fighting for. Despite my exhaustion, I am determined to protect my freedom and my family. I still believe that life is stronger than death.
I will turn 30 next month. I must be careful not to gain weight. I need to be more active and eat less, take care of my skin. I just hope that maybe I will have a few years to live for myself, at last, and not for the army.
Lieut Yulia Mykytenko with her younger brother, Bohdan, who intends to join Yulia's brigade this summer. Photograph: Yulia Mykytenko
My little brother Bohdan will be eligible for the draft in a few months, when he turns 25. He'd rather join the 54th mechanised infantry brigade, where I've served since 2016, than be conscripted. Relatives can't fight in the same platoon, but I hope we'll be in the same company. Last September, Bohdan visited the Hellish Hornets in Donetsk and made himself useful repairing our vehicles. Of course, I will worry about him, but I believe every individual in Ukraine must protect himself and his family. I had hoped that my service and sacrifices – and the lives of my husband, my father and so many comrades – would be enough, but they haven't.
Lieut Yulia Mykytenko's five earlier dispatches
The Russians made them kneel in a line and shot them point blank
The Americans have nerve, asking us to sacrifice teenagers
Denys was skinny and muscular, with fair hair and blue-grey eyes. He was killed near Donetsk in February
I think Putin is testing Trump, to see how far he can go and how many advantages he can get
It may be extortionate, but I'd rather share our resources with US than Russia