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5 Ways Co-founders Can Build Their Relationship to Build their Startup

5 Ways Co-founders Can Build Their Relationship to Build their Startup

Forbes2 days ago

Co-founders need to maintain a healthy relationship so they can work together productively.
80% of the most successful companies are founded by 2 or 3 cofounders, according to research by Ali Tamaseb, author of SuperFounders.
60% of companies fail, however, due to cofounder conflict, according to Noam Wasserman, author of The Founder's Dilemmas.
As an entrepreneur, one of the keys to building a successful company is to choose the right cofounders and make sure you maintain a strong relationship from inception to exit.
On a recent panel at Websummit Vancouver three founders relayed their advice and lessons learned about how to form the right cofounder relationship and keep it vibrant throughout the lifecycle.
Not everyone is lucky enough to grow up with a sibling as entrepreneurial as they are, but if you do you have a built-in cofounder. That's how Erin Millar, founder of IndieGraf, found her partner, who is her younger sister.
Evan Dalton, cofounder of Certn met his crew in the 10th grade and Isaac Evans of Semgrep met his cofounders while at MIT working on a project.
The founders all agreed that you need to make sure you share a common vision, values and have complimentary traits. When those things are aligned with a personality fit, the match can be magical.
Millar had founded a prior company with her little sister. It had been successful but had also taken a toll on their relationship. So for her current company she and her sister sat down and talked through what they wanted to build and - more importantly - how they were going to conduct themselves.
'We were intentional about resetting the dynamic—no more 'big-sister/little-sister,' she said. 'If we wanted a truly equitable co-founder relationship, we had to design it from day one.'
Dalton's cofounder isn't actual family, but to him it feels that way. 'Our families are so intertwined that there's a lot on the line if things go wrong,' he said.
Millar said she and her sister worked with an executive coach who pushed them to address the hard things.
She said that all cofounders should design their playbook, and that it's helped them manage through issue that come up. 'It serves as a source of truth,' she said. 'If there's conflict between us we step back and look at what's our contract together. That has served us really well, and anyone could do that.'
All of the founders agreed emphatically on the importance of communication and talking through hard things.
Dalton said that because the stakes were so high it's essential to really work on communication to be able to tell each other challenging truths.
Evans had to build his muscles in conflict. 'I definitely wasn't good at it,' he said. 'I hope I've gotten better.'
He and his cofounder read Radical Candor together to give them permission and context to embrace conflict.
'Just having a framework where we had a structured way to think about feedback and then acknowledging that it's really important that we be able to disagree.'
That's moved to meetings. 'One of the values that we have is embrace debate. One of the things that I learned as well is if you go to a meeting and there's no conflict in the meeting, it's really boring.'
Evans said they learned to mine for conflict. 'Where is the actual disagreement? because if there's no disagreement, let's end the meeting right now and just get back to work.'
Startups are an extreme work environment, and it's easy to get mired in conflict, disagreement or just neglect.
When that happens, you need to reset. 'Go back to hanging out with them and do the things you both like to do,' suggested Dalton. 'Remember why you got into business with them, because that's the thing that can always bring you back to staying positive.'
When you're the founder of a startup, you're running all the time. You have so much to do, it can be challenging to step back and appreciate all you've accomplished.
Evans and his cofounders have trained themselves to do that. 'Generally what happens is we have some big success like some customer we've been targeting signs or something and then we immediately jump into the problems,' he said. 'Now what we try to do is pull back and say, 'before we get into the problems, let's take a moment to take the win.'
For Dalton, the rituals he and his cofounders use focus on helping them refuel their relationship, like a regular happy hour together, or a fun activity to do together.
Having a cofounder for your startup takes time and energy to make sure you keep that relationship smooth. But it's worth it. 'It's not fun if you can't go through the problems together,' Evan said. 'I just can't imagine doing it alone. It's bonded our friendship and our love for each other better than ever.'

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