People Are Sharing The Family Secrets They Kept From Their Kids Until They Were Adults, And I'm Speechless

Yahoo

12-05-2025

We asked members of the BuzzFeed Community to tell us what secrets their families kept from them until they were adults. Here are their most shocking stories:
1."Found out my very religious uncle, who was married and had six children with my precious aunt, also had two illegitimate children. They were born in the 1940s. One was born before my uncle married my aunt, and one was born after! My aunt knew about them and agreed that they needed to help their mother financially. My aunt was a freakin saint."
—Anonymous
2."My parents apparently had a little girl between my little brother and me. I was raised by my grandma for a while because my mom was sick. The baby was born but only lived for a few hours. Now, after my dad got a little bit too much alcohol in him one night, he told my brother and me. It makes so much sense looking back."
—Anonymous
3."My dad is a triple-Trumper, church going, hyper republican who watches Fox News 24/7. He has always acted holier than thou and looked down on anyone (including my siblings and me) for what he considers 'unchristian' behavior. Welp, turns out he all but made my mom have two abortions, one before and one after marriage, because 'he wasn't ready to be a dad.' My mom told me over MANY drinks one evening. Now, every time he hops on his Christian soapbox. I smile, thinking what a hypocrite he is."
—Anonymous
4."I learned my parents had been swingers our entire lives."
—Anonymous,
5."Turns out my mom is a felon for embezzlement. Everyone kept it a secret until my dad forced my mom to tell me a month before I was to graduate with a bachelor's in criminal justice and psychology."
—Anonymous
6."Both of my parents were married to other people before they married one another. I didn't find out until I was 16. Mind blown."
—Anonymous
7."My dad donated sperm when he was younger. My sister did one of those DNA tests recently. Turns out we have about 10 half-siblings that we know of."
—Anonymous
8."I was 24 in 1981 when I found out in the most shocking way that my dad was gay! I was married and was about to start my second year of teaching while my then-husband was in graduate school. Teachers get paid at the end of the month. He'd overdrawn our account again, and I threw a fit. I demanded that I take charge of the finances, and for the first time ever, had to go to my parents to borrow money. It was about a week to payday, and I figured out the smallest amount of money possible to make it until the end of the month. My parents always said I never needed to call first before coming over, so I went around 4 p.m. before Mom came home from work and I didn't call. I went in through the garage and yelled, 'Hello? Is there anyone home?' with no reply. Dad was on a health kick at the time and was doing a lot of walking, so I sat at the kitchen table reading the paper until he came back, dreading what I was going to ask him."
"Shortly, a tall blonde man with glasses came down the hall buttoning up a white dress shirt. That's all he was wearing, and he was in a certain…condition. He stopped when he saw me, about the same time I looked up. My brain went numb, and I automatically said, 'Hello.' He turned around, went back into Dad's bedroom, and said, 'I think your daughter's here.' A couple of minutes later, Dad came out—thankfully fully dressed—and we chatted small talk for about 30 seconds before my 'fight or flight' kicked in. I blurted out, 'Dad, I need forty dollars.' I didn't bother to explain why; he wrote me a check, and I left."
—Anonymous
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9."My dad had a brain aneurysm when I was in high school. He'd been in the hospital for a few weeks, and my mom, sister, and I would visit every day while he was in a coma. One day, we were walking in when a nurse asked us to wait because his wife and son were just finishing up their visit. My dad's old secretary and a 5-year-old who looked just like my dad walked out of his room. That's when we all learned about my younger half-brother."
—Anonymous
10."I always knew that my parents divorced due to my mother's infidelity, but it wasn't until I was in my 30s that I learned that my dad isn't my biological father. I tried to confront my mother, but she wouldn't discuss it with me at all. I have no idea if my dad knows the truth."
—Anonymous
11."I found out that my aunt and uncle were once step-siblings as teenagers, but a few years after their parents' divorce, they got together and have been with each other for over 35 years now. Only the aunts, uncles, and my nana know, but none of the children except me do."
—silverwings713
12."I found my parents' marriage certificate online and was shocked to find out my mother was four months pregnant with me when she got married. Maybe not that big a deal, but for a young, devoutly Catholic woman in 1958, it must have been a difficult time for her."
—Anonymous
13."When I was 14, I liked this guy who I met at my mom's friend's daughter's birthday party. Word got out that he and I were hanging out, and that was a problem to people. I was told my whole life the guy my mother was married to was my father (he had passed away when I was a year and a half old). But actually, he wasn't; my father was a guy my mom had an affair with during her marriage. That's when I was told that the guy I'd been seeing was my cousin. His uncle was my biological father."
—anonymous
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14."All of my sisters and I (four of us total) had our firstborn sons by someone other than our current husbands. We kept it from all of our kids until recently. It wasn't something to hide; we were just content with our husbands and how they took our boys in like their own. No one even cared, and only one of my sisters reconnected with her ex. The rest of us and our sons could care less about their absent biological fathers."
—anonymous
15."So, I did not learn this until I was 26, but apparently, my dad was a murderer. And get this, nobody figured out he was the killer. He killed a few people and got away with it. He is currently serving life in prison all alone because none of the family will go visit him; they can't believe he would do such a thing."
—anonymous
16."My daughter has a half-sister she doesn't know about. My daughter went to live with her father because he and I were getting a divorce, and his household was the more stable one. About 10 years later, I got pregnant via a boyfriend I lived with at the time. My boyfriend and I agreed it would be better to put the child up for adoption. I have lost track of the adopting parents and will probably never tell my daughter."
—anonymous
17."So, I had been a 'single' mom, but I had been dating several of my kids' friends' dads without their knowledge. But I ended up marrying one of them when she turned 19. I couldn't hold my love back anymore!"
—anonymous
18."My mother had a much older sister who she had to care for. My mother helped care for this sister until my mom was in college. Around that time, her sister had a blocked intestine. She died during surgery for it. I didn't know about my mom's sister at all until I was 12. Then, when I was 19, I found out that my mom's uncle was the surgeon, and he had apparently been drunk during the surgery which is probably why my aunt died."
—Anonymous
19."My parents divorced when I was 8 or 9. I found out in my early 20s that it was actually their second divorce. Apparently, my dad was going to be deployed overseas when I was a baby, so my parents divorced and had all relatives tell the military that they wouldn't take me in. I don't know how quickly my parents remarried after that stunt, but when they divorced the second time, there was split custody."
—Anonymous
20."My parents got pregnant very young, and in a very catholic family. I found out at 22 that I was supposed to be put up for adoption, but my grandparents wouldn't allow it. I was a little pissed for finding out but also happy."
—Anonymous
21."My mom was 16 when she had me, and we don't know who the father is. But when she was in labor, her stepdad refused to let her go to the hospital. Her mom was sick at the time, so my 16-year-old mother had to give birth alone in the back of the car while trying to drive herself to the hospital. A year ago, we found out that her stepdad was accused of stealing drugs at that very hospital. They found a stash in his bag, along with his name. He's now in jail."
—Anonymous
22."I kept it a secret from my kids that I'd been married five times and that I had another kid. I had told them my other kid was their 'cousin' who was being taken care of by my sister."
—anonymous
23."We all found out that my grandparents were divorced in 1978 and never told anyone, but continued to live together. To this day, we have no earthly idea why, as my grandpa still made sure that everything went to my grandma when he died."
—morgan_le_slay
24.And finally, "My ex remarried a few years after we divorced. At first, things were fine, but then, his wife began causing problems for my daughter. When my daughter was 14, she and her stepmother really got into it while she was there for visitation, so she called and asked me to come get her. I spoke to her dad and asked if she could come home and not go for visitation for a month or two to let things cool down. He agreed, but then, his wife insisted he move all of my daughter's belongings out of their house, so she never went back."
"Shortly after, my daughter's dad and the stepmom wrote horrible letters to her and mailed them to my house in her name. When I saw the mail, I opened it, and I could not believe the things they wrote. The stepmother told my daughter she, a teenager, was abusive and causing problems in their marriage and that she was going to turn out to be a terrible person. I put that letter away and just gave it to her last year when she was 30."
—elizabethg20
Submissions have been edited for length and/or clarity.
What's a family secret you didn't learn until you were an adult? Tell us in the comments or use the anonymous form below.
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