I took a pre-parenthood holiday at 31-weeks pregnant – and it changed the way I see motherhood

Telegraph

19 hours ago

The sun was just beginning to sink over the Ionian sea as my husband and I hiked down a steep path to a completely isolated beach on the island of Kefalonia. At 31 weeks pregnant, I was not at my most agile, and getting down the rickety path safely had required a superhuman level of care and attention.
But once we reached the bottom, and I slipped into the cool, inky sea, every tentative step seemed worthwhile. I gazed up at the mountains which surrounded us, and thought how this would be the last time – for a while, at least – that he and I would be able to make this kind of journey.
The next time we have a holiday, it will be with our son. There will be a buggy to drag around, a bag filled with nappies, wet wipes and snacks, and we will be desperately sleep deprived, more inclined to make use of the pool than go off the beaten path in search of perfect, quiet spots like this.
It was not the first time I'd mused on the subject. In fact, it was this realisation, some months before, which had led to my planning this trip – despite knowing that I would be, by then, extremely pregnant.
On past holidays, I'd seen the ever-alert parents: sunbathing with one eye open, chasing after little ones who'd strayed too close to the water's edge, sun lotion in hand, dealing with tantrums and wiping away tears.
I wanted one last holiday just the two of us, one which would reflect the kind of trips I've always loved: relaxing but wild, with good food on tap and a refreshing sea to jump into, far from armies of sunbeds and tourists.
I wanted, one last time, to be able to fall asleep under the sun without a care in the world.
And it wasn't just that. If I had a pound for every time a parent has told me, over the last few months, to 'enjoy the sleep while you can', I'd be a very rich woman.
What I manage not to say in return is that, thanks to the aches and pains of pregnancy, I haven't actually had a good night's sleep in eight months anyway. If I was going to be twisting and turning in the wee small hours, I reasoned, it might as well be on a beautiful island, to the sound of gentle waves lapping the shore.
I love Greece. I've been there many times, and knew it would guarantee a holiday that catered to all our needs: sun, sea, friendly locals, good food, and great hotels. Kefalonia – a new island for us – delivered all of this in spades.
We spent a large chunk of our trip based at Eliamos, a beautiful spread of five-star villas nestled in the countryside of Spartia, a village 12km south east of Argostoli, the island's capital.
The village's name, locals proudly told me, came from the Spartans who used it as a key military base during the Peloponnesian War in ancient times, and its sleepy, simple, rustic offerings were exactly what I'd been hoping for.
I had wanted a higgledy-piggledy, time-warp little place with a local taverna, a small shop selling cold beer and groceries, an old church, and a small café; with dusty streets where cats sit on the roofs of old cars, and friendly elderly women wave down from their porches as dusk approaches. It was perfect.
So too was smart, stylish Eliamos – a stark contrast from the nearby village, with various activities on offer (I particularly enjoyed the pregnancy Pilates) as well as a private pool beside our delightful villa.
It catered perfectly to my desire to slow down, and I spent most of my time drifting between pool and sun lounger, while my husband could take advantage of the resort's guided hikes when he wanted to stretch his legs. There was a beautiful wild beach a short walk away, too, though I surprised myself by opting more often for the pristine infinity pool – my aching back grateful for the softly padded loungers.
For the final few days of our trip, we decamped to the nearby Celestial All Suites, a boutique hotel (like Eliamos, part of the Mr & Mrs Smith collection) where each room had a private terrace and plunge pool – a good option when I wanted to bob serenely and cool off, though – as swimming is currently one of the few exercises that doesn't hurt my heavier body – I did also spend time in the 65-metre pool, getting some laps in while surrounded by those beautiful mountains.
Our trip was a peaceful experience, and we returned – as I'd hoped – both rested and relaxed. And yet, the most significant outcome was an unexpected one. It was only during our holiday, when I was able to step outside my everyday routine, that I realised my priorities have already started to change.
I've only realised that I wanted to become a mother in the last couple of years. It took me meeting the right person, and in the two years since we met, we've travelled together as much as possible – to Europe, Morocco, gorilla trekking in Uganda, on safari in Kenya, and across America, drinking a lot of margaritas and staying up late into the night.
Parenthood is something we both knew we wanted, but nevertheless, it is a daunting – and enormous – change, and we were living as though we were on borrowed time.
As a result, before this trip, I'd been able to think of this next chapter only in terms of subtraction: not being able to jump spontaneously onto planes; stop at beach-side restaurants on a whim, without checking for kids' food and high chairs; stay up late; drift off on the beach under Grecian sun.
But during this holiday, something shifted, and I found that I was looking at these big changes less as limits, and more as new horizons. I looked forward to sitting on a beach, my focus no longer myself, but entirely on the child playing nearby on the sand, and to happily substituting endless days of lying, half-asleep, in the sun for ones in which I show my son all the exciting new things around us, helping him have fun, keeping him safe.
The next step is still daunting – but now, it feels more like a gift than ever.
The golden rules of holidaying while pregnant
Opt for a short-haul flight (especially in your third trimester)
While the tropics and the Caribbean were tantalising options, I couldn't face getting on a flight for more than eight hours. Back ache, restless legs and swollen ankles aren't conducive to a long time cramped on an airplane. This may be a moot point if you're travelling on a lie-flat, first-class bed, but as we – and, I'd wager, most hastily saving pregnant couples – were not, we stuck to Europe.
Talk to your doctor or midwife
Guidelines say that it's safe to travel (and fly) until the late stages of pregnancy, but we're all different, so it's always worth checking in with a professional, especially if you're past the 28-week mark. Some airlines also require a doctor's note.
Choose somewhere with a nice pool and plenty of sun loungers
A beach within walking distance is also a major bonus, meaning you can have a change of scenery without having to travel far.
Find somewhere with good local amenities
You don't want to have to jump in a cab every time you run out of bottled water or snacks, so ensuring there is a shop or café close by is a must.
Sleep – or at least, try to
Good amenities, yes, but by the same token be sure to avoid accommodation in a lively neighbourhood so you're not woken up by noisy party goers in the middle of the night when you've just drifted off, nor building works taking place at the crack of dawn. Likewise, make sure there is good air conditioning. Sleep may be elusive when pregnant, but having the right conditions in place to at least make it possible is key.
Pack comfortable footwear
I left my heels at home (my balance is off as it is, and this was not the place to risk a broken ankle).
Bring twice as much suncream as you normally would
Your skin is extra sensitive while pregnant, so it's important to cream up – plus, if your bump is big, there's more than usual to cover.
Essentials
Danielle Sheridan was a guest of Eliamos Villas and Spa, which has rooms from €759/£650 (including breakfast, based on two people sharing an Amos Sea View Suite with private pool); and of Celestial All Suites Kefalonia, which has rooms from £210 per night (including breakfast, based on two sharing a Special Offer Junior Suite with private pool). Easyjet flies from London to Kefalonia from £74 return.