I wasn't on Air India Flight 171, but I haven't stopped reliving the horror
Based on true eventsIt was 12 am when I got a call from my father, a very unlikely time for someone who is usually in bed by 11 pm.'Hello, your mother and sister's phones are still switched off. Have they landed?' a restless voice asked from the other end.
'It's raining in Mumbai, probably that's the reason for the delay,' I tried to pacify him, though I was equally worried about their well-being. 'Don't worry, they'll probably land any moment.'advertisementI was just about to check the flight status when my sister messaged: 'LANDED.'I let out a sigh of relief, called dad, told him they had landed, and went to sleep.The incident I'm talking about is from June 16, just four days after Air India Flight 171 crashed in the Meghaninagar neighbourhood of Ahmedabad, killing 241 out of 242 passengers on board.Life hasn't been the sameIt's been just about six months, but the year has brought more bad news than good.It feels like we've been moving from one bad dream to another, without even getting time to recoup from the trauma each incident leaves behind — be it the terrorist attack on unarmed tourists in Baisaran Valley, Kashmir, that killed 26 civilians, or the Air India crash that sent shivers down our spines.advertisementWe weren't there when these incidents happened, and I'm sure many of us thanked our stars for that, but we've relived every moment of those horrific events, every single day, through social media and news coverage. And it's far from a good feeling.The Air India crash has reignited my lingering fears as a flier.I know a neighbour who changed her Air India tickets to Dubai and made sure she booked a different airline. If that meant no refund, so be it.I've always been an anxious flier (the anxiety comes from the fear of a crash itself), and this felt like my worst nightmare come true. Once you're onboard, your life depends entirely on the pilot, and of course, on the aircraft, which we mostly assume is in perfect condition.After all, who would allow a faulty aircraft to fly, right? It's human life we're talking about.But the allegations seem to suggest otherwise.The haunting storiesI wasn't on that fateful flight, but every story I read about the passengers onboard makes me feel closer to their lives.What will happen now that they're gone? For some, it was a journey that promised the joy of a new beginning; for others, just a reunion with loved ones. All of it, silenced in one go.advertisementWhat's even worse is thinking about their last moments.What must have happened? How did they react? Was it painful?These questions may sound insensitive, but they come from one quiet, persistent fear: if I were ever in that situation, what exactly would happen?After all, these were just regular passengers, just like you and me, who boarded a flight one fine afternoon, only to see everything come to an end in a few seconds.Social media makes it worseSocial media hasn't been helpful either. While several influencers are busy suggesting which flights to avoid (Airbus or Boeing), conspiracy theorists are sharing their own dissected versions of the story.Then there are astrologers, warning people not to fly on certain dates because of Mercury Retrograde. I don't usually believe in astrology, but this time, I gave in. And right now, I'm genuinely rethinking whether I should travel at all this year.Since the crash, there's been a steady stream of updates about flights being diverted, sometimes due to technical snags, sometimes bomb threats, and somehow, Air India seems to be at the centre of every bad news.A fear shared by manyadvertisementJust when I thought I was alone in feeling this way, the persistent dread, the intrusive what-ifs, I realised this isn't just a personal battle with fear. I'm not the only one avoiding booking tickets or googling 'safest airlines 2025' at 2 am.Zoom out, and you'll see it's not just a few nervous fliers grappling with post-crash jitters. The collective mental health toll of such tragedies runs deeper and wider than we like to admit.'When a crash of this scale happens, something so unprecedented in recent aviation history, it jolts people's sense of safety,' explains Dr Vishnu Gade, Consultant Psychiatrist at Arete Hospital. 'Even if you're not directly involved, the mind doesn't always make that distinction. You're still processing trauma, just second-hand (vicarious trauma).'According to Dr Gade, this isn't just a vague unease. What many of us are feeling can show up as a very real phobia, fear of flying (aviophobia), heightened anxiety, even panic attacks, especially when these events are followed obsessively through the news or social media.The remedy, Dr Gade stresses, is the importance of support systems - family, friends, and yes, therapy if needed - especially if the anxiety lingers beyond a few weeks, starts affecting sleep, or disrupts daily functioning.advertisementAlso, something else that he said seemed true yet heartbreaking:'In another month, people will move on. That's the world we live in. But for some, especially those who were affected, even indirectly, the fear doesn't leave. It lingers quietly, in our choices, our habits, our hesitation to book that next ticket.'(Views expressed in this piece are those of the author)Tune InMust Watch
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