There's a Reason Michelle and Barack Obama's First Date Inspired a Movie

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2 days ago

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Barack and Michelle Obama may have one of the most famous political marriages of the modern era, thriving through two terms of the White House and over 30 years together. The pair met in 1989 at a Chicago law firm, and it was love at first sight—for Barack. Michelle, then known as Michelle Robinson, took a little convincing to go on that first date, but she had no hesitation when he asked her to marry him in 1992.
In the last eight years since Barack Obama ended his two terms as President of the United States, both he and Michelle have remained politically engaged, traveled the world, released books, produced films and podcasts, and stayed on as cultural influencers in almost every corner of the U.S. and many abroad. And they're still going strong, celebrating their long love story every year it grows.
Here's their complete relationship timeline so far.
Barack began working at the same Chicago law firm as Michelle in 1989, Sidley Austin LLP, and she was actually assigned to be his mentor. He told O, The Oprah Magazine in 2007 that he was immediately taken with her, but she wasn't exactly on the same wavelength.
'In the luckiest break of my life, [Michelle] was assigned to be my adviser, I remember being struck by how tall and beautiful she was,' he explained. 'I asked her out. She refused. I kept asking. She kept refusing.'
In her own interview with ABC News in 2008, Michelle implied that the firm thought they'd be a good match, even if just as business associates.
'Because I went to Harvard and he went to Harvard, and the firm thought, 'Oh, we'll hook these two people up,'' she joked. 'Barack, about a month in, asked me out, and I thought 'No way. This is completely tacky.''
Eventually, she did say yes.
In her 2018 book Becoming, Michelle described their first date by saying he picked her up in a Datsun with a 'rusted-out, four-inch hole' in the floorboard where she 'could see the pavement rushing beneath us.'
But the date went well.
'He showed all the sides—he was hip, cutting edge, cultural, sensitive. The fountain—nice touch. The walk—patient,' Michelle told The Telegraph in 2012.
Their first date even became the subject of the 2016 film Southside With You, showing the couple going from a lunch at the Art Institute of Chicago, walking across the city, having Baskin-Robbins ice cream in Hyde Park, and seeing the Spike Lee movie Do The Right Thing. Plus, a very special first kiss:
Two years after their first date, they got engaged at Gordon's restaurant in Chicago just after Barack passed the bar exam, per ABC News.
'And then the waiter came over with the dessert and a tray. And there was the ring,' Michelle said. 'And I was completely shocked.'
They were wed on Oct. 3, 1992. They wrote their own vows, and Michelle later reflected, 'Barack didn't pledge riches, only a life that would be interesting. On that promise, he delivered.'
Their reception was held at the South Shore Cultural Center, and they then took a trip along the California coast for a honeymoon, Brides magazine reported in 2020.
They welcomed their first child, Malia, on July 4, 1998.
'Being a mother has been a master class in letting go. Try as we might, there's only so much we can control. And, boy, have I tried—especially at first. As mothers, we just don't want anything or anyone to hurt our babies. But life has other plans. Bruised knees, bumpy roads, and broken hearts are part of the deal. What's both humbled and heartened me is seeing the resiliency of my daughters,' Michelle told Meghan, Duchess of Sussex, in an conversation for British Vogue in 2019.
Their second daughter, Sasha, was born on July 10, 2001. In a 2013 interview with Essence, Barack talked about Michelle and the role model she has been as a mom.
'The great thing about the girls is they've got a wonderful role model in their mom,' Barack said. 'They've seen how Michelle and I interact—not only the love but also the respect that I show to their mom. So I think they have pretty high expectations about how relationships should be, and that gives me some confidence about the future. I joke about this stuff sometimes, but the truth is they are smart, steady young women.'
Michelle described more about life with both girls in those early years to British Vogue, sharing, 'When Malia and Sasha were newborns, Barack and I could lose hours just watching them sleep. We loved to listen to the little sounds they'd make—especially the way they cooed when they were deep into dreaming.'
In 2004, Barack became a U.S. senator for Illinois after serving as state senator for several years. The family became much more public, though they had both already been serving their community for some time. Michelle worked on Barack's campaign while also serving as vice president for community and external affairs at the University of Chicago Hospitals.
And yet, that was not the highest echelon of government service the senator would reach by a long shot. In 2008, Barack defeated Republican nominee John McCain to serve as the President of the United States.
In January 2009, Barack was sworn into office. The inaugural ball was a hugely celebratory evening, where Michelle wore a gown by Jason Wu. After being introduced by Denzel Washington, Barack asked the crowd, 'First of all, how good looking is my wife?'
That night, Jay-Z, Mariah Carey, Alicia Keys, Shakira, Sting, and Faith Hill performed and the couple was photographed slow dancing like they were the only two people in the world.
In his 2010 State of the Union address, Barack addressed how popular his wife is.
'If you were going to list the 100 most popular things that I have done as president, being married to Michelle Obama is number one,' he joked.
In 2011, in an interview on The Oprah Winfrey Show, he credited Michelle for his success.
'Obviously I couldn't have done anything that I've done without Michelle,' he told Oprah Winfrey. 'Not only has she been a great first lady, she is just my rock. I count on her in so many ways every single day.'
Michelle agreed that their partnership was the key to their success, telling Winfrey, 'It has to be a true partnership, and you have to really, really like and respect the person you're married to, because it is a hard road. I mean, that's what I tell young couples. Don't expect it to be easy, melding two lives and trying to raise others, and doing it forever. I mean that's a recipe made for disaster, so there are highs and lows. But if in the end, you can look him in the eye and say, 'I like you.' I stopped believing in love at first sight. I think you go through that wonderful love stage, but when it gets hard, you need a little bit more.'
Barack won a second term in 2012, defeating Mitt Romney in the presidential election. At the 2012 Democratic National Convention, Michelle told the audience, 'The truth is, I loved the life we had built for our girls. I deeply loved the man I had built that life with, and I didn't want that to change if he became President. I loved Barack just the way he was.'
In March 2015, they were photographed in a behind-the-scenes moment embracing just before videotaping a segment for the 2015 World Expo.
At the United State of Women summit in 2016, Michelle said that both she and Barack were ready to leave the White House and have some semblance of a normal life again.
'I want to open my front door without discussing it with anyone—and just walk,' Michelle said, per People. 'I want to go to Target again! I've heard so many things have changed in Target! I tell my friends they're going to have to give me a re-entry training for like, 'OK, what do you do at CVS now? How do you check out?''
That same year, Barack told Jimmy Kimmel on Jimmy Kimmel Live!, 'All the women in my life are looking forward to being able to live a more normal life.'
The family left the White House in January 2017, and were seen in Italy, Hawaii, and Necker Island.
During his wife's book tour for Becoming, Barack surprised Michelle while she was being interviewed by Valerie Jarrett, bringing a bouquet of pink roses to the stage.
'You don't get this at every show!' Michelle joked.
'This is like—you know when Jay-Z comes out during the Beyoncé concert? Like, 'Crazy in Love?'' Barack asked. 'It's the same thing. It's just a little sample to enhance the concert.'
Michelle celebrated Barack for their anniversary.
Barack's memoir A Promised Land was dedicated to 'Michelle—my love and life's partner, and Malia and Sasha—whose dazzling light makes everything brighter.'
In a September 2020 episode of The Michelle Obama Podcast, Michelle was open about some of the challenges in marriage people don't often discuss.
'There were times that I wanted to push Barack out of the window. And I say that because it's like, you've got to know the feelings will be intense,' she admitted. 'But that doesn't mean you quit. And these periods can last a long time. They can last years.'
When talking about meeting someone, the former first lady replied, 'You can't Tinder your way into a long-term relationship. There's no magic way to make that happen except getting the basics of finding somebody, being honest about wanting to be with them, to date them seriously, to plan on making a commitment, to date them, seeing where it goes, and then making it happen.'
The couple had their official portraits hung in the White House in 2022. Barack praised Michelle's portrait by Sharon Sprung, saying it encapsulated 'her sheer grace, her intelligence, and the fact that she is fine.'
His portrait was painted by Robert McCurdy, and Michelle had previously shared a photo of herself appreciating it.
That same year on the Revolt x Michelle Obama special hosted by Angie Martinez, Michelle talked about the frustrations of early marriage, especially just after their children were born.
'People think I'm being catty for saying this; it's like, there were 10 years where I couldn't stand my husband. Ten years! And guess when it happened? When those kids were little,' she explained. 'Little kids have demands. They don't talk. They're poor communicators. They cry all the time. They're irrational. They're needy. And you love them more than anything. And so you can't blame them. So you turn that ire on each other.'
Things improved when she realized 'marriage isn't 50-50, ever.'
'But guess what?' she continued. 'Ten years; we've been married 30. I would take 10 bad years over 30—it's just how you look at it. People give up: 'Five years; I can't take it.''
She added that it helps to 'know your person.'
'Do you like him? I mean, you could be mad at him, but do you still look at him and go, 'I'm not happy with you, but I respect you. I don't agree with you, but you're still a kind, smart person.' The feelings are gonna change over time,' she continued.
While speaking with host Jay Shetty on the On Purpose podcast, Michelle dispelled the idea that she and Barack were #hashtag couple goals, adding that 'broken things' can happen 'even in the best of marriages.'
She wanted to normalize discussing the 'natural, understandable rough patches' that make people 'want to quit.'
'And it's like, 'Oh, no, no, no, no, no. That's not quit-worthy. That's just the nature of things,'' she said. 'That's just the way it goes, but you don't quit on it, you learn from it. That's what sustaining a relationship is—it's the choice to figure it out, not quit when it gets hard.'
For her 60th birthday that year, Barack celebrated Michelle in an Instagram post, describing her as his 'better half' and 'one of the funniest, smartest, most beautiful people I know.'
He added, '@MichelleObama, you make every day better. I can't wait to see what this new decade brings you.'