Wedding kiss restrictions branded ‘bizarre' by humanist leader at inquiry

South Wales Guardian

29-04-2025

The long-term impact of lockdown on wedding trends included more outdoor ceremonies and shorter timescales for planning, the inquiry heard.
The Scottish Covid-19 Inquiry's worship and life events impact hearings began on Tuesday, with evidence from faith leaders from different denominations including the Catholic Church, Free Church of Scotland, as well as from the Humanist Society Scotland and the Jewish Council of Scotland.
Fraser Sutherland, of the Humanist Society Scotland, said as recently as 2024, weddings were going ahead which had been postponed during the pandemic, and branded some restrictions 'bizarre'.
Mr Sutherland said: 'Some couples decided they didn't want to get married, some people's relationships ended.
'We did also see a significant increase in small weddings. There were quite a lot of people who were relieved they didn't have to have a big wedding. I think a lot of couples feel pressure from family and friends to have a big ceremony. I think quite a lot of people felt they had a licence to do what they wanted.'
He added: 'The restrictions for masks for couples was removed there were numerous conversations with the Government about removing masks for declaration. There was a bizarre circumstance where there was no kissing allowed.
'In humanist tradition most of those couples would be already living together.'
All the faith leaders said that they were dedicated to sticking to the restrictions – however, Mr Sutherland said that some venues were desperate to generate income and would allow people to break the rules.
Mr Sutherland said: 'There was a lot of push-back particularly as pandemic pressed on, from couples, from wedding venues, who were keen to get as many people in as possible.
'We had a lot of difficult situations where couples were being told one thing by venues, our celebrant turns up and there's 50 people when there should be 20. We had couples saying 'everyone here is exempt, around mask wearing'.'
Rev Donald MacDonald of the Free Church of Scotland, based on Tiree, Skye, said: 'On Skye we tend to get a number of elopement weddings every year – they came to an end when lockdown was announced. All these arrangements in place for a year to 18 months had to be cancelled.
'Others delayed planning of their weddings. We did schedule a meeting with government representatives to try to argue for permission of having weddings – within our tradition a number of folk moving in together is not an option before marriage.'
Ephraim Borowski, of the Jewish Council of Scotland, said: 'It might have been useful to have a hotline, or some kind of exception granting mechanism, completely general, which would give us a definite answer, I think that would have helped.'
He added: 'I wasn't aware of any time anyone said about the 1919 Spanish flu pandemic so as far as we knew nothing had been learned from that. That puts this inquiry into perspective, because presumably the point is to learn for the future. Is anyone actually going to remember?'
Rt Rev Brian McGee, of the Bishops' Conference of Scotland, said that NHS workers were deprived of pastoral care in hospitals, along with sick or dying people, due to restrictions.
He said that mass could only be celebrated in a church, and that faith leaders were not told about a decision to close places of worship in the second lockdown, until it happened.
Mr McGee said: 'We've talked about ceremonies but when people were in hospital, they were looked after by NHS staff who were in fear for their own lives.
'When people are sick and they're nervous they would want the comfort of a visit, some pastoral care and prayers being said for them.
'I know the difficulty for that and infection control but could there have been more consideration given.
'When a chaplain goes in they're there for anyone looking for help including the staff. There could have been pastoral care available for staff.'
The impact of restrictions on funeral rites was compared to 'physical pain' by other religious leaders, the inquiry heard.
Omar Afzal, from the Scottish Association of Mosques, said: 'I would describe the effect of not being able to fulfil religious rites as almost like physical pain in the effect it had.'
Ravi Ladva, from the Scottish Hindu Foundation, said: 'As part of the Scottish community have to be pragmatic. We didn't question why only six members are allowed in the crematorium.
'A lot of our community members are on the frontline of the NHS and public services. As much as I would like to mourn, my duty to my community and the rest of Scotland comes first. The psychological aspect are there for the mourners as well to help them manage their grief.
'Through the pandemic we were fortunate to scramble together online services where it still maintained some semblance of community.
'It does require review and has not been forgotten how we were treated and our practises and rituals were portrayed.'