The age of unsolicited dick pics and a long history of phallic exhibitionism

Daily Maverick

11-05-2025

As we pulled up to the stop sign near their primary school, my two young daughters noticed graffiti sprayed on a vibracrete wall surrounding the corner house.
'What's that?' asked our oldest, who must have been about 10 at the time.
A bold, huge, cartoonish erect penis and hair-speckled balls stood out in black against the grey. Conjure Jeff Bezos's New Shepard rocket that shook the Earth for the threesome of singer Katy Perry, Bezos's fiancée, Lauren Sánchez, and Oprah's bestie, Gayle King, and you get the picture.
After explaining it was a penis, it became slightly trickier to answer my daughter's follow-up question.
'Why?'
I chose the simple route.
'Because they can.'
The judge and the dick pics
A Judicial Conduct Tribunal continued to hear evidence last week regarding sexual harassment claims that have been brought against Eastern Cape Judge President Selby Mbenenge.
As evidence leader Salomé Scheepers has reminded the tribunal – chaired by retired Judge Bernard Ngoepe – never before has a sitting judge president been subjected to a Judicial Conduct Tribunal on charges of sexual harassment.
Judge Mbenenge is accused of sexual harassment by Andiswa Mengo (40), a court secretary in the Eastern Cape division. Mengo has claimed that among the barrage of inappropriate WhatsApps was one containing a photo of the judge president's 'private parts'.
Judge Mbenenge has admitted to 'consensual' conversations with Mengo, but denied exposing his erection to her in his chambers or sending her the photograph.
A digital forensic analyst, Francois Moller, testified this week that he could not find forensic evidence that Mbenenge had sent a photo of his penis. Moller told the tribunal he had analysed two cellphones, Mbenenge's and Mengo's. Although Mbenenge's phone had been wiped clean of all messages, hundreds remained on Mengo's device.
Why?
Moya Sarner, writing in The Guardian in 2019, asked exactly this question, as more and more women dating online were complaining that men were sending them images of their genitals.
Whoever saw it will never forget the WhatsApp that former minister of many departments Malusi Gigaba shared, which darted around the satellites and the internet like a non-fungible porn token.
Sarner quotes Leah Holroyd and her experience with a potential online partner, who at first shared many of her literary and other interests, only to post an explicit photo just before they were due to meet.
This is a worryingly common experience in that neck of the woods, according to a 2018 UK YouGove poll, which found that four in 10 women between 18 and 36 had been targets of unsolicited explicit images.
'Nor does this just happen through online dating. Some men have used the AirDrop function on their Apple devices… to send unsolicited pictures to women,' wrote Sarner.
The problem had become so widespread that MPs and campaigners were calling for a law targeting 'cyberflashers'.
The law of the lingam
In India you will encounter the lingam, a phallic symbol representing the god Shiva and his 'generative power'. The lingam is not a lone ranger like in the West, but is often paired with the yoni, its feminine counterpart iconograph.
The Greeks were big on phallophilia and held ceremonies with processions of phallic symbols. The Egyptians often depicted the god Min with a large erect penis symbolising power and fertility.
The Christians were responsible for erasing images of erect penises from society by depicting the devil with a large dong, tempting men into sin. This association led to the suppression of phallic symbols.
Another UK survey in 2019, on the online dating site Match.com, revealed that 47% of the men who took part admitted to sending explicit images of themselves, believing it 'to be a genuine form of courtship'.
The Journal of Sex Research found that 'the technological revolution affords great anonymity, a condition which increases the likelihood of engagement in sexualised behaviours, especially for men'.
Researchers had discovered that 'men tend to overestimate women's interest in receiving nude imagery based on their own receptivity in reversed roles'.
The tribunal into the sexual harassment charges against Judge Mbenenge last week went to great lengths to decipher the deeper meaning of a series of emojis in the build-up of the judge's alleged grooming of Mengo.
Judge Mbenenge's significant position of power and alleged abuse of it in the workplace have been the thickest thread in the sordid and shameful tale unfurling at the Judicial Service Commission tribunal. DM
This story first appeared in our weekly Daily Maverick 168 newspaper, which is available countrywide for R35.