At work, not all help is perceived the same way

Free Malaysia Today

2 days ago

The way people express emotions while helping others can influence whether their assistance is welcomed, resented, or reciprocated. (Envato Elements pic)
PARIS : Imagine an employee who spontaneously offers to help an overworked colleague. If this is done with empathy and discretion, there's a good chance the gesture will be gratefully received. But if this help is accompanied by a condescending tone or a smug attitude, it risks provoking unease and even rejection.
Such are the findings of a US study by Stephen Lee, assistant professor of management at Washington State University's Carson College of Business, in collaboration with the University of Washington.
Their findings are clear: when gratitude or sympathy accompany help, it is perceived as sincere, and the resulting relationships are stronger and more enduring. But if help is accompanied by excessive pride or contempt, it inspires more mistrust and limits the chances of reciprocation.
'It's not just whether you help, but HOW you help, and the emotions you express, that shape how people respond,' Lee said.
In an environment where mutual aid is often encouraged, the emotion expressed becomes a key indicator in the eyes of those who receive a helping hand. If they perceive genuine motivation, they'll be more inclined to trust and cooperate in turn.
To come to this conclusion, the researchers combined data from three separate experiments, supplemented by a pilot study. Drawn from the professional and academic worlds, the participants shared memories of mutual support, reacted to roleplaying situations, or took part in lab-based exercises.
In all configurations, 'socially engaging' emotions fostered perceptions of prosocial motives, stronger relationships, and greater willingness to reciprocate.
Encouraging gratitude and humility in working relationships helps foster solidarity among colleagues. (Envato Elements pic)
These observations qualify the idea that all help is naturally welcomed; employees decode the intentions behind such gestures. Help perceived as motivated by altruism or benevolence strengthens cohesion, but if it appears self-serving or forced, it can have the opposite effect.
Managers would do well to take this into account. For example, 'snowplough managers', who struggle to delegate to their team, end up depriving others of autonomy and learning opportunities. This well-intentioned but overprotective or directive stance can make their help feel cumbersome, even counterproductive.
Creating a genuine culture of mutual aid requires sincere concern for others, without encouraging helping behaviour for its own sake. Encouraging gratitude, listening, and humility in working relationships helps to foster solidarity among coworkers.
As for employees, this study invites them to reflect on their own ways of helping. Recalling past experiences, trying to put yourself in the other person's shoes, or observing the reactions provoked by your behaviour are useful exercises to help identify the right attitudes and approaches to take.
This could help build stronger professional relationships and a more cohesive team.