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Why Paul Mashatile reminds me of Jacob Zuma

Why Paul Mashatile reminds me of Jacob Zuma

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My marriage is healthy – except for my wife's total refusal to touch me
My marriage is healthy – except for my wife's total refusal to touch me

Yahoo

timean hour ago

  • Yahoo

My marriage is healthy – except for my wife's total refusal to touch me

After years of no sexual intimacy with my wife, I am now craving the comfort of somatic connection. Not actual sex, but simply cuddling and being held close while nude. But my wife has refused. I have suggested we try 'progressive desensitisation' therapy, which would involve lying down together, with one item of clothing removed, but with no physical contact. We would build from there in the knowledge that this would not lead to sexual contact. My wife, when I suggested it, was not at all interested in this, and in fact, she was actively opposed. She told me the problem was in my head and that she had zero interest in physical intimacy. She also said that this was normal for older women. I told her it was my impression that older people actually craved appropriate physical touch. She then agreed that I could just lie in her bed fully clothed before retiring to my own bedroom. But this was just awkward and humiliating for me, because it was obvious that she was not in the least invested in my presence. So I gave up the idea completely. In every other regard our marriage is healthy. At times, I consider asking her if she could accept my seeking intimacy elsewhere, but I think this would lead to the end of our marriage. I feel trapped – I love my wife but my resentment is growing. Your sense of despair and sadness is understandable, and you deserve to be happier. Your needs are real and valid, but in truth this is not a sexuality problem; rather, it is a power struggle that you are losing. Your joint task would be to break down the barriers to fully seeing each other's simple human needs and struggles, to summon empathy, and to find common ground. When two people are locked into this kind of emotional 'prison', it is very difficult to see a way out. There can be a way, but the impasse that has developed is so well-entrenched that it is unlikely to be dissolved without the willing participation of both of you in some kind of mediation process – preferably couples counselling. Many couples lack the communication and negotiating skills necessary to overcome such a problem without outside help. Pamela Stephenson Connolly is a US-based psychotherapist who specialises in treating sexual disorders. If you would like advice from Pamela on sexual matters, send us a brief description of your concerns to (please don't send attachments). Each week, Pamela chooses one problem to answer, which will be published online. She regrets that she cannot enter into personal correspondence. Submissions are subject to our terms and conditions. Comments on this piece are premoderated to ensure discussion remains on topics raised by the writer. Please be aware there may be a short delay in comments appearing on the site.

Video: Officials investigating late night boat fire at Chatfield State Park
Video: Officials investigating late night boat fire at Chatfield State Park

Yahoo

timean hour ago

  • Yahoo

Video: Officials investigating late night boat fire at Chatfield State Park

DENVER (KDVR) — Fire and wildlife officials are investigating after a boat caught fire at Chatfield State Park late Sunday night. South Metro Fire Rescue crews and Colorado Parks and Wildlife officials responded to the fire just before 11 p.m. at the North Boat Ramp of Chatfield Lake. The boat was fully engulfed in flames, but no one was on board, according an X post from South Metro Fire Rescue. 2 hikers rescued in 2 days near Telluride prompt warning Several crews brought the fire under control. CPW rangers and South Metro crews removed the damaged boat from the water to prevent further environmental impact and to protect fish habitats. Since no one was on board, no injuries were reported. Crews are still investigating what caused the fire. Copyright 2025 Nexstar Media, Inc. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten, or redistributed.

Fairfield neighbors say new playground at Allen Witt Park keeps getting trashed
Fairfield neighbors say new playground at Allen Witt Park keeps getting trashed

CBS News

timean hour ago

  • CBS News

Fairfield neighbors say new playground at Allen Witt Park keeps getting trashed

Neighbors in Fairfield say their brand-new playground looks more like a dumping ground after people have trashed the park with half-eaten food, empty bottles, party decor, soiled diapers and left behind garbage on multiple occasions. Sarah Cisneros The all-inclusive playground at Allen Witt Community Park just opened in early May, when CBS13 shared the community's excitement for the neighborhood's new addition. Sarah Cisneros, who lives just a few minutes from the park, was excited to take her four children there to play, until she says she started noticing others were not treating the new community amenity with any respect. "People have no shame, you know? And it's too bad. It's too bad," said Cisneros. Sarah Cisneros Cisneros sent CBS13 photos she took at the playground over the weekend, which show tables left behind with remnants of a party, uneaten food and trash. The trash cans in the playground were also pictured overflowing, with the flower garden behind also littered with garbage just feet from the playset. Cisneros says it was an unsafe environment for children to play in. "There's alcohol bottles fully open sitting right there. That's unacceptable," said Cisneros. She and her husband reported the incident to the city and they say they believe a city team came out the next day to clean up the mess. After posting the photos in a Solano County neighborhood Facebook group, hundreds of comments from community members poured in. Some commented that they had also recently seen the park in this state and others said they were not surprised. "It's just trashed all around. It sucks because everyone in the community, as soon as everyone saw this [new playground] was getting built up, we all said, 'this is not gonna last,' " said Cisneros. She is disappointed that some community members are selfishly choosing not to clean up after themselves, setting a bad example for the children attending the park who have to play in garbage. Cisneros says that after giving the park multiple chances, she does not wish to take her children back to play. "Because I don't want my kids running around in trash. If I don't let them do this in my own house why would I want them to be in the public, roaming around in trash? It sucks because now all they say is, 'why don't we go to the park?' " said Cisneros. She is asking the city to step in with a solution -- whether it's more cameras, more trash cans or more park maintenance patrols to try and catch those trashing the park in the act. Either way, she's asking for more accountability at Allen Witt Park so families can continue to enjoy the new playground.

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