NGO duo guide fathers toward more engaged parenting

New Straits Times

11 hours ago

KUALA LUMPUR: Fatherhood can be a daunting journey, especially without guidance. But two men are working to change that by providing crucial support for struggling fathers, helping them thrive in their roles.
Jason Leong and Joshua Hong, chairmen and co-founders of Better Dads Malaysia, a non-profit organisation dedicated to empowering fathers, described their mission not as a "men's club", but as a national movement.
"It's a national movement because we want to shift the narrative of men becoming more responsible fathers in our society.
"And since many don't know where to begin, we provide modules and workshops to help guide them," Leong said.
As fathers themselves, Leong and Hong realised the glaring lack of resources available for men navigating the responsibilities of fatherhood.
"I started working with Jason after uncovering data about paternal absence while I was a youth worker.
"I believe most fathers love their families. But many don't realise how important their presence truly is," Hong said.
Since launching Better Dads Malaysia six years ago on International Men's Day (Nov 19), the duo had identified deep-rooted stereotypes in Asian culture that view fathers primarily as breadwinners and disciplinarians.
"Many fathers can be physically present but emotionally absent at home.
"Which is why a father's presence is equally important as well in a household," Leong said.
To combat this, they aimed to dismantle these outdated beliefs by promoting a more emotionally engaged, communicative and supportive version of fatherhood through their organisation.
"For example, we teach dads to say three simple things to their kids every day: 'I love you', 'You're good at what you do' and 'I'm proud of you'.
"These small affirmations can have a powerful impact on a child's self-worth and development," said Leong.
Beyond direct support, Better Dads Malaysia has also been a key player in advocating policy changes for Malaysian fathers.
The organisation played a central role in pushing for the country's paternity leave policy — securing a seven-day leave despite initial proposals for 30 days.
They are currently lobbying for tax incentives to be given to companies that support certified fathering programmes.
But of all their work, the initiative that had resonated most deeply was their engagement with prison inmates.
In February, they finally received the green light from authorities to begin conducting fatherhood workshops in prisons nationwide.
It was there that they discovered that many inmates, often neglected by their fathers, yearned for emotional validation.
"When we started the workshop, I would often tell them we're all good men who made some bad choices, which establishes a sense of equality among us, and we are all the same.
"These affirmations are important as we don't judge and condemn them, and instead accept them as they are," Leong said.
After completing the workshop, certificates of achievement were given to the inmates, and their reaction to this small gesture caught Leong and Hong by surprise.
"Some cried when receiving their first certificate of achievement, saying they had never been recognised before.
A standout moment for Leong came when a simple hug offered during a prison workshop sparked a chain reaction.
"Everyone lined up for a hug after I hugged one of the inmates.
"They told us they had never received a hug from their fathers. That kind of human connection — acceptance without judgment — is what they've been missing," he said.
The duo plan to compile data from the workshops with inmates, with plans to publish research that could guide future policy and programme development of their organisation.
"To all the fathers out there — you are not alone. We are part of a movement.
"There are many other fathers who can be your support system, your community.
"Come and join us. Be part of this larger community of fathers — learning, growing, and striving to become better every day," Leong said.