Burying my 14-year-old was my worst nightmare. This is the question I wish I'd asked.

USA Today

2 days ago

Burying my 14-year-old was my worst nightmare. This is the question I wish I'd asked. | Opinion Gun injuries are the leading cause of death in the U.S. for children and teens. The rate of them dying from firearms has gone up 106% since 2013. We can save children from that tragedy.
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New Mexico deputies disarm two boys in coordinated response
Newly released drone footage captured two boys passing a loaded weapon before being surrounded by sheriff's deputies. The sheriff's office blurred their faces.
When I bought my 14-year-old son a crisp, navy suit with a yellow bowtie for his upcoming spring formal, I never imagined that I'd have to bury him in it just days later.
My radiant, joyful boy went over to a family member's house, where he and his cousin found an unsecured gun in a drawer, hidden beneath a T-shirt. They started playing with it, not realizing it was loaded. Minutes later, JaJuan was gone.
The phone call we received that afternoon, informing us what happened, was every parent's worst nightmare. And it was entirely preventable.
My husband and I had always been protective of JaJuan. We had taught him as a child to look both ways before crossing the street and not to accept rides from strangers. And we had always ask other parents the usual questions – about screen time, video games and curfews – before letting JaJuan go to a friend's house.
But we never asked: "Is there a gun in the house? If so, is it stored securely?"
It never occurred to us that the thing that posed the greatest risk to JaJuan's life would be a firearm, but gun injuries are the leading cause of death for children and teens in the United States. And since 2013, the firearm death rate among children and teens has increased by 106%.
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We can agree that children shouldn't die from guns
One of the things I've realized since my son passed away is that addressing gun violence and its impact – especially on children – doesn't have to be a partisan issue. With our children and teens at the center of this crisis, it can't be. A recent study from the Johns Hopkins Bloomberg School of Public Health showed that gun injuries claimed over 2,500 children's lives in 2022 – more than car crashes, overdoses or cancers.
For older teens, 1 out of every 3 ages 15-17 who died in 2022 died as a result of a firearm injury.
Whether you're a lifelong gun owner or someone who has never touched one, we all want our children to be safe. And there are plenty of solutions that the majority of Americans support – if we'd simply start a conversation about gun violence prevention, one rooted in the common ground we share. In fact, 8 in 10 Americans agree that productive conversations can help reduce gun injury and death among children and teens.
Everyone shares the goal of reducing suicides and unintentional shootings – which in 2022 accounted for nearly 60% of all gun deaths. These tragedies often receive less media attention than intentional shootings, but they devastate families and communities all the same.
To save lives, we need a cultural shift. That starts in our homes and communities, with conversations that help people understand how asking simple questions, practicing secure storage and understanding the signs of a mental health crisis can prevent irreversible loss.
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Talk to kids, other parents about gun safety. Here's how.
For starters, ask other parents, friends and relatives if they keep firearms and how they're stored. It might feel awkward at first. But just like you'd ask about peanuts if your child has an allergy, asking about guns could save a life.
Similarly, parents – even the ones who don't personally own guns – need to talk to their kids about firearm safety. Make sure kids understand that guns aren't toys, and as a precaution, what to do – and not do – if they see one. Ultimately, it's the adults' responsibility to keep them safe.
We also need to normalize open conversations around mental health. This is especially important when it comes to putting necessary time and space between a teen in a moment of crisis and a firearm, so that they don't make a tragically irreversible decision.
Parents of teens who show signs of emotional distress – like becoming suddenly withdrawn or having decreased interest in school and other activities – should consider alternative storage options for their firearms until the crisis passes.
I don't enjoy talking about this topic, but I've become so passionate about this issue because JaJuan's story could help save another family from going through what we did. Talking about secure storage and crisis intervention doesn't have to be controversial. It just has to be done to protect our children.
I encourage – in fact, I beg – other parents to start those lifesaving conversations today. And for those who don't know where to begin, information and resources to help start the conversation are available.
We don't have to – and might not – always agree on everything, but we can all agree that we can all play a role in creating a safer America where gun violence is no longer the leading cause of death for children and teens.
Julvonnia McDowell is the mother of a son who died from an unintentional shooting and is an advocate for secure gun storage.