'I spent 15 years inside a GAA dressing room and always wondered if I belonged'
Mark Shields has spoken about being a gay inter-county footballer - and hopes that by doing so he may help young GAA players that are struggling to express their sexuality.
The Armagh GAA star spoke in front of an audience over the weekend for the first time about being an openly gay player. Shields told how he questioned for 15 years if he belonged inside a senior inter-county dressing room.
He said at the GPA Pride Brunch over the weekend: 'I spent 15 years inside a senior inter-county dressing room, and I always wondered if I belonged.
'I never heard anyone like me speak up, so I stayed silent. That silence cost me.
'It was a male environment, very macho. You just felt, if they knew I was gay, maybe you'd lose your place, maybe you wouldn't be accepted.
'So I pushed it down, and that weight became heavier every season.'
Shields told how it was "a daunting task coming out". The defender is the first active male inter-county player to talk about being gay since Donal Óg Cusack.
He explained: 'It was a daunting task coming out, whenever, it was about 10 or 12 years ago.
'But like I said, the culture has changed within society, within the group in Armagh, and I feel I can express myself more, the group are more accepting.
'The language used around the group has changed, and there's people standing up for people and myself in the group, whereas maybe that didn't happen as much before.
'I think the culture and everything is changing within the GAA itself.
'I hope speaking out and telling my story will help that kind of younger player for male and female, non-binary, to express themselves in the GAA environment.'
He also revealed how it was important to find someone he trusted and how his sister helped him.
'For me it was a process. I had to find someone who I trusted in, that was my sister. I spoke to my sister a lot, I have a close relationship with her, my partner as well," he added.
'It's finding someone you trust and you want to express yourself to them.
'They were the ones that stood by me throughout and supported me whenever I felt down or low or in the dumps or in a dark place.
'And it doesn't have to be in front of a group, it can be a one-to-one conversation.'
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