Trump's Military Birthday Parade Was a Gross Failure

Yahoo

a day ago

WASHINGTON — On Saturday, President Donald Trump held a hideously expensive military parade in Washington, D.C., on his birthday. Trump and his top officials stood on a stage at the National Mall behind two tanks, before two large digital American flags. Military bands and troops, some on horses, some in vehicles, some in tanks, others in Howitzers, marched in the streets. So did a few robot dogs. An army parachute team jumped down. Helicopters flew over. Drones flew by. There were many, many tanks.
The spectacle was billed as honoring the U.S. Army's 250th birthday — and planners put in admirable effort to sell this fiction, with processions designed to honor key times in American military history. In reality, the event was just one part of the Trump administration's vast, billion-dollar government effort to make the leader feel good about himself.
The weekend's pageantry, which some administration officials referred to as 'Donald Trump's birthday parade' behind closed doors, fulfilled the president's longtime desire for a grand military parade. Starting at the Pentagon in Virginia, the troops in the parade — who honored the Revolutionary War, the Civil War, World War II, the Korean War, and the Vietnam War — had to walk for about two-and-a-half miles.
Trump sat next to his wife Melania and the former Fox News host, Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth. At points, Trump stood alone in front onstage, saluting troops marching as the 1st Cavalry Division marched by. At another point, Secretary of State Marco Rubio was pictured yawning on C-SPAN. The military officials shown on C-SPAN spoke with reverence about the Global War on Terror.
Late in the event, Trump stood at a podium onstage and swore in 250 new or reenlisting troops. 'Welcome to the United States Army and have a great life,' Trump said after they recited the Oath of Enlistment. 'Thank you very much. Have a great life.'
After two hours, the event reached its logical conclusion: political speeches. J.D. Vance went first. 'June 14 is of course the birthday of the Army,' Vance said. 'It is, of course, the birthday of the president of the United States. And Happy Birthday, Mr. President.' He delivered the laugh line of the night, 'It's also my wedding anniversary,' he said before immediately leaving the stage.
Finally, Trump spoke. He praised the army — and armies of years past. 'Our soldiers never give up, never surrender and never ever quit. They fight, fight, fight and they win, win, win,' Trump said, in what seemed like an obvious reference to his own declaration of 'Fight, Fight, Fight,' after a failed assassination attempt grazed his ear in Butler, Pennsylvania, during a campaign event last year.
'We're the hottest country in the world right now,' Trump said. 'Our country will soon be greater and stronger than ever before.' He said America is 'blessed beyond words by this valued legion of army warriors.'
He continued, 'No matter the obstacles, our warriors will charge into battle. They will plunge into the crucible of fire, and they will seize the crown of victory, because the United States of America will always have the grace of Almighty God and the iron will of the United States Army. Congratulations to everybody. We love our country. We've never done better. Thank you. God bless you. God bless the army and God bless America.'
Trump stood for a moment beside his wife, Melania, before Trump campaign regular Lee Greenwood sang 'God Bless the U.S.A.' (Trump and Greenwood sell a bible together.) 'Happy birthday Mr. President,' Greenwood said at one point.
When he was done, attendees started singing happy birthday to Trump near the stage.
Even before the speech component, the C-SPAN feed gave off a vibe that alternated between military recruitment video and softcore Trump propaganda. Video played several times of Trump giving speeches. Occasionally, a small banner popped up that said: 'Video courtesy of America 250.' The nonprofit America 250, which is helping organize the ongoing publicly-funded campaign celebrating the country's semiquincentennial, has been taken over by Trump allies and one of his campaign operatives.
Corporate America did their part. 'Special thanks to our sponsor Lockheed Martin,' the MC said around 6:30 p.m., shouting out America's biggest defense contractor. The MC later thanked 'our special sponsor Coinbase,' the cryptocurrency exchange. President Trump sure loves crypto — he reported in his financial disclosure Friday that he made $57 million in the final months of 2024 after he and his family launched their own crypto exchange, World Liberty Financial. (That was before he launched his own $TRUMP meme coin.)
Around 7 p.m., the big screens onstage that displayed the American flags turned to logos for UFC, the mixed martial arts business. Later, the MC thanked 'special sponsor Palantir,' a contractor hired to help Trump compile data on Americans across federal agencies.
Military handed out drinks from sponsor Phorm Energy — a new drink by Anheuser-Busch and UFC CEO Dana White, in the flavor Screamin' Freedom.
Rock music was the soundtrack of the parade, including AC/DC's 'Thunderstruck,' during the War on Terror section. There were instrumentals from the Heart song 'Barracuda' and Metallica's 'Enter Sandman.'
The military parade was overseen by the American commander-in-chief as he conducts a militarized crackdown on immigrants in Los Angeles, California, driving protests. He sent in National Guard troops and Marines not because their presence is necessary to keep the peace, but as a show of force — and as a test run for operations in other states and cities, should the president feel angry enough to launch them, likely illegally.
At 2,000 locations across the country, protesters held a 'No Kings' Day to voice their anger toward the president. About 20,000 people gathered in downtown Los Angeles, undeterred by law enforcement's use of non-lethal weapons on earlier protests and the president's escalation by sending in troops.
Law enforcement largely left protesters alone for much of the day, but they deployed tear gas in the Atlanta area and arrested eight people, Fox 5 Atlanta reported.
For an event that shut down much of central Washington D.C., closed key roads, and reportedly cost up to $45 million, the promise of a spectacle of America's military might — that just coincidentally happened to fall on Trump's birthday — didn't draw out legions of his fans. Instead the crowd of supporters, servicemembers, curious locals, and military adjacent spectators who braved the oppressive heat and humidity of a post-thunderstorm D.C. managed to just fill out their allotted side of the street over several blocks in front of the White House, with plenty of room to spare.
In front of the central stage a crowd befitting a midsize concert gathered in view of Jumbotrons. The lawns surrounding the Washington monument — which have hosted countless inaugurations, protests, concerts, and gatherings, were largely unused overflow space.
When the TV broadcast showed the crowd risers along the parade route, they were sparsely filled. The National Park Service issued permits for 250,000 people for the National Mall festival and the military parade. An aerial parade of historic military aircraft flew above the National Mall, traversing a course from Lincoln to Washington that — despite clear anticipation of crowds by event organizers — was more empty field and food truck line than crowd.
Though rock music blared on TV, the parade itself was eerily quiet. One video posted on X shows tanks squeaking past nearly silent crowds, sounding like a grocery cart in need of grease.
In the weeks leading up to his birthday and the parade, Trump told close associates that protesters were going to try to overshadow the military parade, including in the media coverage, in D.C. and elsewhere, and that he was determined not to let that happen, a source with knowledge of the matter and another person briefed on it tell Rolling Stone.
Millions of people reportedly participated in 'No Kings' parades Saturday across the country.As the D.C. military parade took place, hundreds of protesters stood outside the federal building in downtown Los Angeles. People had been dancing around, before hundreds of cops circled the four-block square without warning or announcement, leading to a tense stand-off, according to a Rolling Stone reporter on the ground. Flash bangs went off, and police used tear gas and smoke grenades to clear protesters.
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