'You are my heroes' - Antonio meets people who saved his life
Content warning: This article contains discussion around suicide and depression
"Meeting these people who saved my life has been very humbling."West Ham striker Michail Antonio's near-death experience has changed him, compelling him to engage with a recovery process containing mental and physical obstacles.The 35-year-old was involved in a car crash almost six months ago that resulted in him spending over three weeks in hospital with a broken leg, facing a gruelling journey back to fitness.He is now up and walking, continuing his rehabilitation programme, after shattering a thigh bone when his Ferrari skidded off the road and struck a tree in Epping Forest.The Jamaica international had been on his way home from training.Antonio is looking back in an effort to move forward. He spent time with BBC One's Morning Live, retracing moments that not only threatened his career but his life, and met those who responded to emergency calls on 7 December."I want to say thank you," he told Essex and Herts Air Ambulance paramedics Rob Moon and Dr James Moloney, "because obviously I wouldn't be here if it wasn't for you guys."You saved my life, so you guys are basically my heroes."
'We immediately knew who you were'
Antonio, who previously explained he has no memory of the accident, crashed and was trapped in his car. He was freed by crew from Essex County Fire and Rescue Service who left him in the care of ambulance staff.West Ham, in an initial announcement about the crash, said their "thoughts and prayers" were with Antonio.The seriousness of the accident is not lost on the former Nottingham Forest player.He said of the paramedics: "I don't remember their faces at all. It's crazy because of how important you guys were to me."Moon explained how he and Dr Moloney knew who they were treating: "There was one clue - there was a West Ham shirt in the passenger seat with Antonio on it."Antonio asked if he was speaking after the incident, and Moloney told him: "Yes, you were incredibly repetitive, but that happens when people bump their head."We kept asking about your football, who your manager was, whether you are enjoying your football. From our point of view, you were talking which was really reassuring for us."The paramedics explained Antonio was discovered on the back seat of the car and "quickly assessed" to have had fractured his femur.He was given pain relief, strapped to a board and put in an ambulance to shield him from the cold and rain.The crash came as Storm Darragh battered the UK.Meetings with paramedics are offered after life-threatening incidents to help patients rationalise what happened to them.Antonio was able to ask questions, including querying whether he was taken to hospital by air ambulance.Moloney clarified: "Whenever we can, we fly to hospital because it is quicker, but on the day the pilot quite rightly said no [because of the storm]."Antonio was driven to the Royal London Hospital in Whitechapel.In a previous interview with Morning Live in March, Antonio said: "I've always been a fan of sports cars, but I can't lie to you, sports cars are not my friends. So right now, I have a Mercedes people carrier and my brother is my driver."For now, anyway, I'm staying far away from sports cars."
'Family probably experienced it more than I did'
Antonio also met Trish Burton, a member of the patient and family team for the air ambulance, and told her how his loved ones "probably experienced the incident more than I did"."They've gone to the hospital, they've come to see me, they've seen how I was. I don't remember my face being cut or anything... and going down for surgery the next day, I don't remember doing that," Antonio said."But they were all in the hospital, they have those memories, they lived it whereas I didn't live it as much as them."Antonio has previously explained he "almost wasn't there" for his children and how the crash affected his 13-year-old eldest in particular.
Antonio talks trauma with Carlisle
Antonio said earlier this year it was "horrendous" for him to see a change of manager at West Ham during his lay-off, as Graham Potter replaced Julen Lopetegui.His contract expires in June and because of injury he has had no opportunity to impress Potter on the pitch, which Antonio said has affected his mental health.Antonio has been a public advocate for therapy since talking to the High Performance Podcast in May 2024. Past counselling sessions have helped to equip him for his latest setback.Antonio met with former Leeds, QPR and Burnley defender Clarke Carlisle, who explained how a serious knee injury in 2001 led him to alcoholism and how he made three suicide attempts between 2003 and 2017.Carlisle said: "The first time when adverse mental health came into my consciousness was in 2003 because I went into alcohol rehab. It is interesting timing because I got a knee injury in 2001 at QPR, which kept me out for two years."I was told I was going to walk with a stick and never play again at 21 after I had just broken into the England Under-21s."Even though that had happened in my life, and the club knew about it, we didn't treat it like a mental health thing that needed addressing. I didn't do anything about it until 2010 until I was officially diagnosed with depression."It took two further suicide attempts in 2014 and 2017 for me to actually take action on my mental health."Carlisle said he had been raised with the message that "you do not talk about our business outside this house".He added: "I didn't want to engage with any of the resources out there but that's changing now."Antonio has previously explained he used to "push down" his emotions and could not celebrate West Ham's Uefa Conference League success in 2023 because of his mental health struggles."When I was talking to Clarke I definitely identified with the culture side of things, not to put your business out to the world," Antonio said."I definitely could feel what he was saying because that's what I had to experience when I was younger."
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