A patriotic tradition at Theon
May 25—THEON, Wash. — What began as a small Memorial Day gathering nearly a decade ago has become one of the largest community events in Anatone and the surrounding area.
"I don't want to step on any toes," Travis Polek joked. "But if we keep growing at this level, we might pass up Anatone Days."
Hundreds gathered at the home of Polek and his wife, Letha Polek, for the ninth annual Theon Military Flag Ceremony. The event has become a small town tradition that, as Travis put it, shows that people respect the true meaning of Memorial Day.
The ceremony "takes an army" of people to organize each year, Travis said. It's complete with a live and silent auction, and thousands of dollars are raised to support the Idaho Veterans Assistance League in Lewiston.
The gathering originated from humble beginnings when Travis' father, Tom Polek, gifted him a 42-foot flag pole in 2016. More than a dozen neighbors, family members and friends assembled to mount it and raise an American flag.
Travis said since then a pole has never been brought out without being hoisted. He goes through three 6-by-10-foot flags, and a much larger 10-by-15 one for the ceremony, each year to greet drivers passing on Washington State Route 129.
Travis said he has the utmost respect for those who have served, like his father and brother, Todd Polek, who are U.S. Army veterans.
A flag gifted to Travis by Todd is the focal point of the service. At the exact time it had been lowered to half-staff, two fighter planes cut through clear blue sky. Asotin resident Mike Warwick said the P51 Mustang planes belong to Travis' longtime friend, Gary Peters, that were used in World War II and the Korean War.
Prayers, the national anthem, songs from all branches of the military and a speech from Warwick and retired U.S. Marine Jason Brown were part of the observance.
"It's a rare privilege to live a life with purpose and honor," he said. "Their sacrifice is not in vain ... so we can live in a nation with freedom and truth called the United State of America."
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And because of John's health, the federal judge it was assigned to, Judge Timothy Black, had to clear his docket and he heard arguments on the case on Monday, 11 days after we got married. And that very day he ruled in our favor. And then John died three months later to the day, but he died a married man. Zach Wichter: The fight didn't stop there, obviously. The judge ruled in your favor, but it went on in appeal, it got overturned. How did you decide at that point, once the record was correct in your paperwork, that you were going to keep on with the fight? Jim Obergefell: Once Ohio appealed and we lost to the Sixth Circuit Court of Appeals, when Al said, "Do you want to keep fighting?", my immediate answer was, "Of course I do." If I don't, I'm not living up to my promises to John. I promise to love, honor and protect him. And if I don't keep fighting this to make sure our marriage can't be erased, then I'm failing in my promises. In April, 2015, I was in the Supreme Court for oral arguments. And then I was there again on June 26th, 2015 when the decision came down. Zach Wichter: What was that experience like being in the court for oral arguments in a case that bore your name? Jim Obergefell: I don't think you could ever prepare yourself to go to the Supreme Court as a plaintiff, let alone as the name plaintiff, when there's more than 30 other plaintiffs in the case. It would be overwhelming enough just being one of those 30 plaintiffs, but to have your name and your story and your face be what everyone sees, what everyone hears, what everyone knows, it's overwhelming. And I had to be in that courtroom. I had to be there to hear what the justices said, to hear what the states argued. But to be fair, I went into the courtroom feeling optimistic. I refused to think that the highest court in the land could possibly rule against us. And I was positive, I was optimistic, and that didn't change after oral arguments. And I was happy that I knew I had at most two months to wait for a decision. Zach Wichter: I've seen in other interviews you've said that you never really considered yourself an activist. So, how did you go from Jim from Ohio to suing the state of Ohio and becoming a gay rights figurehead? Jim Obergefell: I think it just happened. And honestly, it's because of John, because we loved each other and we wanted to exist. Learning that our right to call each other husband and to have it mean something wasn't going to be reflected on his death certificate... I mean, it did, it broke our hearts. But I think the more important thing is it really made us angry, the injustice of it, the harm that it was doing to us. So, I think it was that. It was that I loved John, he loved me back. We finally had the chance to say I do. But then understanding how our home state, the state where I was born and raised, would completely disregard us, made me angry, made us both angry. So, not something I ever thought would happen, but it's amazing what'll happen when you love someone enough, when you're willing to fight for what you know is right, and when you're angry. Zach Wichter: And you mentioned before you were also in DC the day the decision came down. What was that experience like, and what were you thinking about, and what would you have said to John if he was there with you? Jim Obergefell: I'm just holding the hands of friends sitting on either side of me thinking, all right, here it comes, here it comes. And of course I'm thinking, John, I wish you were here, I wish you could experience this, I wish it was your hand I was holding. All I wanted in that moment was to hug and kiss John and say, "Our marriage can never be erased." He wasn't there. I didn't have that joy of sharing that moment with him. I thought about so many people who I had met over the course of the case, the people who were coming up to me and sharing photos and telling me stories and talking about what this potential decision meant to them and what it meant to the person they loved, their child, was thinking about them. And then just the unexpected realization that for the first time in my life as an out gay man, I actually felt like an equal American. I wasn't expecting to feel that. And that was a really beautiful realization. I feel equal. It's about queer kids having a future, knowing that in the words of a mom and dad who stopped me on the street in Philadelphia with their child in a stroller, they said, "Thanks to you and those other plaintiffs, Jim, we know our kid can one day marry the person they love, no matter whom that person is." That's what I think about. So, I don't get too hung up in the "you're a historic figure" because that just, I don't know, feels weird to me. I focus more on the difference the fight I was part of has made for millions of people. Hundreds of thousands of couples have gotten married since June 26th, 2015. And that's something we should celebrate. I'm really, really grateful that I got to be part of that. And it's simply because John and I loved each other and we wanted to exist. Zach Wichter: Jim, thanks for coming on The Excerpt. Jim Obergefell: Thanks for having me. It was great. Zach Wichter: Thanks to our senior producers, Shannon Rae Green and Kaely Monahan for their production assistance. Our executive producer is Laura Beatty. Let us know what you think of this episode by sending a note to podcasts@ Thanks for listening. I'm Zach Wichter. Taylor Wilson will be back tomorrow morning with another episode of The Excerpt.
