The Bezos-Sanchez nuptials are almost enough to turn me into a socialist
I do not wish to be a party pooper but isn't there something uniquely grotesque about Jeff Bezos's wedding? And I'm not just referring to his bride Lauren Sanchez's cosmetically-enhanced face.
The multi billionaire couple have taken over Venice for their seemingly never ending nuptials, which are being attended by 200 guests, including Kim Kardashian, Oprah Winfrey and Leonardo DiCaprio.
The fest was supposed to be the epitome of refinement, oozing the sort of continental sophistication that moneyed Yanks yearn for.
Yet so far it has proved to be a triumph of tackiness over taste. We've had a pyjama party and the couple cavorting around on their $500 million yacht covered in foam.
This reminded me of a budget holiday I took to Faliraki in 1996. My school mates and I paid about £250 for that week away in Rhodes. The new Mr and Mrs Bezos are rumoured to have dropped at least $20 million (£14 million) on this similarly classless cringefest.
Naturally the anti-capitalists have been out in force, protesting against 'what the wedding represents'.
The crusties claim they are responsible for creating a 'climate emergency'; the socialists claim they are making people poorer; angry locals claim tourism is forcing them out of their homes.
I don't agree with any of this. Bezos's business model isn't the problem here. Amazon employs 1.5 million people. It is arguably the most consumer-friendly company in the world.
No, what I object to is the idea that a high net worth wedding now seems to necessitate this sort of festival of narcissism. One day of ostentation might be just about bearable but six?
Far from affirming the Bezos's affluence, it smacks of imposter syndrome in the vein of Harry Enfield's Loadsamoney: 'shut yer mouth and look at my wad'.
We know you're one of the richest men on planet earth, Jeff, you really don't need to spend the national debt of Tuvalu to prove it.
Never has Oscar Wilde's famous quote about people knowing the price of everything and the value of nothing been more apt.
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