Forget Timelines. How To Let Go Of Outdated Societal Expectations

Forbes

28-03-2025

Societal timelines often dictate when we should reach life milestones—but breaking free from them ... More can lead to greater fulfillment, mental well-being and self-defined success.
From the moment we understand the world around us, societal norms and timelines shape our expectations of ourselves and others: graduate by 22, build a career by 30, marry by 35, peak professionally by 45 and retire by 65. This 'social clock' heavily influences people's decisions, often pushing them to act in ways that align with the expectations of their culture rather than their own goals or readiness. According to The Mind & Company, this influence operates consciously and unconsciously, creating internalized pressure to meet milestones at specific ages. Over time, these pressures can significantly impact mental health—contributing to feelings of persistent inadequacy, anxiety, and self-doubt.
The impact of these societal norms extends well beyond life choices—it deeply affects mental health. Individuals who don't align with these norms report higher levels of stress, lower self-esteem and symptoms of depression. These emotional challenges are exacerbated by constant comparison and fear of judgment.
Research published by the National Center for Biotechnology Information highlights a growing rise in mental health issues, including anxiety and depressive disorders, tied to increasing social pressures and perceived inequality. The more society clings to rigid timelines, the more it contributes to widespread psychological distress, making it critical to question and redefine what it truly means to be 'on time' in life.
While many continue to chase societal milestones—often at the expense of their well-being—others are choosing a different path, one guided by personal fulfillment over public expectation. Few embody this shift more clearly than Elizabeth Talerman. A brand consultant and founder and partner of the Nucleus Group, Talerman was 60 when she finally felt she was living her best life.
After decades of strategic work, building her firm and saying 'yes' to what was expected of her, she pivoted—intentionally. Not because society said it was time to retire, get married or slow down, but because she chose to live on her own terms.
'I live in a universe of my own—the Elizabeth-verse,' she said, 'with the mantra of 'I go on, I exist and I am enough.'' It's a mindset that took years to adopt but one that shielded her from the paralyzing pressure many feel when they don't meet traditional milestones 'on time.'
Elizabeth Talerman, partner at the Nucleus Group, at The Center for Fiction.
As Talerman points out, none of the conventional trappings, whether the wedding industrial complex or the corner office, matter if they don't nourish you.
Instead of focusing on 'supposed to,' she asked, 'Where does my energy make the most difference?' It's a question rooted in self-awareness and impact, not obligation. That clarity doesn't come from conforming; it comes from choosing.
Talerman has had a successful career spanning nearly 40 years in branding and marketing. She served as marketing director at Harvard Business School before being recruited by Ogilvy, where she worked on the IBM account. Soon after, she launched her consultancy, growing it into a respected strategic agency.
Despite her professional accomplishments, she never let societal timelines dictate her strategy or goals. She didn't marry young or retire at 65. Instead, she got married for the first time at 60, after more than a decade in a deeply fulfilling relationship. Rather than completely stepping away from work, she transitioned from full-time leadership into consulting on projects that align with her values. For her, this was realignment. She calls it 'freedom money,' the ability to invest her time and energy into what brings her joy and creates lasting impact. In doing so, Talerman created space for love, purpose, and presence on her terms and in her time.
The truth is that societal timelines are often more about commerce than care. They sell an idea of success, love and happiness that's easy to market but frequently false in reality. Breaking free from them is the real journey.
Talerman concluded, 'Life is a lean in, lean forward and learn forward endeavor.' And there's no deadline for that.