3 days ago
- Entertainment
- The Herald Scotland
A tip for you, JK: Harry Potter should be Scottish, don't you think?
He has thought about having a stern word with the bustling, buzzy beasties and demanding that they change their postcode.
However, he gets the feeling that they aren't open to dialogue, so Graeme has concluded that he should change his address instead, and perhaps even retreat to foreign shores, to be as far away as possible from the enemy army.
His wife is not persuaded and told him not to be a big dafty. After all, she adds: 'We're not talking about wasps. It's only bumble-bees.'
An unrepentant Graeme tells the Diary: 'The problem is the word bumble, which makes the pesky varmints sound cute, when they're actually evil incarnate.
'The same thing would happen if you called the villain from Star Wars Bumble-Darth Vader.'
MacMagic
Congratulations to young Scottish actor Dominic McLaughlin, who will star as Harry Potter in a new TV adaptation of JK Rowling's fantasy series.
JK herself is, of course, also based in Caledonia, so the Diary is wondering if a more Scottified version of her famous books should be made available.
Reader Don Lawrence suggests one of the novels should go by the title Harry Potter and the Goblet of Buckie.
Bendy boozing
Shopping in her local supermarket in Glasgow's south side, reader Jenny Miller noticed a poster advertising wine and yoga classes.
Jenny was not enticed, and tells us: 'It seems like an awful lot of effort to get a glass of wine. I prefer my local pub, which is offering wine and no yoga classes. Far more civilised.'
David Donaldson notes that this is the sort of car that would drive you to drink… (Image: Contributed)
Read rage, revisited
We mentioned a chap who stopped reading Anger Management Magazine.
Diary correspondent Ian Barnett received a call inquiring why he'd cancelled his subscription to the very same publication.
In reply, Ian snarled: 'Who wants to know!?'
Food for thought
Glesga gourmand Steven Hutcheson visited an Italian chippy with his wife, and bought a square slice of pizza.
'So should it actually be called a piazza?' mused his wife.
Morning mourning
Overheard in a café in Glasgow's West End by reader Claire Oakley.
One young lady said to her gal pal: 'What part of your morning routine takes longest?'
Without skipping a beat, the morose chum replied: 'Finding the will to live.'
Mind your language
Linguistically-limber Craig Garvey from Giffnock tells us: 'Sometimes I use words I don't understand so I can sound more photosynthesis.'
