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Malay Mail
3 days ago
- General
- Malay Mail
Not all leaders shout — Nahrizul Adib Kadri
MAY 29 — I was never the loud one. Not in school. Not at family gatherings. Not in lecture halls, faculty meetings, or boardrooms. I've never felt the need to raise my voice just to be seen. I don't dominate a room. I don't seek the centre. But I've always been there. And over time, I've come to realise: being loud isn't the same as being effective. And presence doesn't require volume. We live in a world that often rewards noise. The loudest voices get the clicks. The most confident ones, the spotlight. The extroverted, the assertive, the performative — they're labelled natural leaders. But here's the truth: visibility isn't leadership. And performance isn't presence. Back in school, I wasn't the most brilliant, nor the most charismatic. I was somewhere in the middle — quiet, observant, a little nerdy. I didn't attract crowds, but I built friendships that spanned groups: the overachievers, the rebels, the in-betweens. I was the guy who would listen while others talked, who helped organise without demanding credit. Somehow, that made me trustworthy. And maybe that's why I ended up as president of the Arts Club — not because I asked for it, but because people knew I'd show up, get things done, and treat everyone fairly. That moment taught me something that stayed with me: leadership isn't about drawing attention. It's about holding responsibility — even when no one's watching. Years later, that same quiet rhythm carried into my professional life. As an academic, I've led departments, managed student communities, sat on panels, and even directed a corporate communications centre for a major university. I've helped the Universiti Malaya (UM) community (lecturers, staff, students) to appear in the media nearly 2,000 times. But you won't find me making grand speeches or chasing virality. My approach is different. Quieter. More deliberate. I lead by doing. By writing. By connecting people. By creating room for others to grow. Silence isn't awkward; it's respectful. Pauses carry meaning. What is not said can be just as powerful as what is. Speaking less doesn't mean knowing less; it often means knowing when to speak. — Unsplash pic And still, I've never needed to shout. Malcolm Gladwell, in his 2013 book David and Goliath, talks about the 'advantage of disadvantage.' He reframes how we see strength. David didn't win because he defied the odds — he won because he understood the odds better. Goliath was heavy and slow. David was agile and precise. What looked like weakness — being small, being quiet, being underestimated — was actually an edge. The same can be said for leadership. What we dismiss as passivity might actually be perspective. What we see as indecision might be reflection. Being quiet doesn't mean you're unsure. It often means you're thinking. Planning. Choosing your words carefully. That kind of leadership — the kind that listens more than it talks — is desperately needed today. Some cultures understand this better than others. In Japan, there's a deep cultural appreciation for ma — the space between things. It's found in music, in design, in conversation. Silence isn't awkward; it's respectful. Pauses carry meaning. What is not said can be just as powerful as what is. Speaking less doesn't mean knowing less — it often means knowing when to speak. Imagine how different our institutions, classrooms, and boardrooms would be if we respected that principle more. If we didn't equate noise with knowledge. If we made space for quiet leadership to rise. I see this often in my students and colleagues. The ones who speak softly but think deeply. The ones who hesitate before answering, not because they're unsure, but because they're weighing their words. I make a point to notice them. To encourage them. Because I know what it feels like to be overlooked simply because you're not loud. And I know what it feels like to carry weight silently. So, if you've ever felt like you don't fit the mould of a 'typical' leader — if you're the one who stays in the background, who observes more than you interrupt, who writes rather than performs — I want to tell you this: you don't need to raise your voice to raise the bar. You don't have to be loud to lead. You don't have to be the centre of attention to make a difference. Let your work speak. Let your presence speak. And when it's your time to speak, make sure it matters. Because not all leaders shout. Some listen first. Some build from the edges. Some lead with calm, with care, with quiet consistency. And in the end, when the noise fades, it's often their impact that lasts the longest. * Ir Nahrizul Adib Kadri is a professor of biomedical engineering at the Faculty of Engineering, and the Principal of Ibnu Sina Residential College, Universiti Adib Kadri is a professor of biomedical engineering at the Faculty of Engineering, and the Principal of Ibnu Sina Residential College, Universiti Adib Kadri is a professor of biomedical engineering at the Faculty of Engineering, and the principal of Ibnu Sina Residential College, Universiti Malaya. He may be reached at [email protected] ** This is the personal opinion of the writer or publication and does not necessarily represent the views of Malay Mail.
Daily Mail
01-05-2025
- Entertainment
- Daily Mail
Did Meghan Markle break up Prince Harry and David Beckham's bromance? How the pair went from clubbing together in London to an explosive phone call which ended it all
Born to a working class family in east London, David Beckham did not expect to one day be rubbing shoulders with royalty. But the former football star, who turns 50 today, has become somewhat of a regular fixture at royal events - although he has not yet received the knighthood he so craves. Last year, Beckham (notably OBE) was made ambassador for the King's Foundation after a meeting with Charles at his beloved Highgrove Estate. During a tour of the luxuriant gardens which span 15 acres, the unlikely pair exchanged tips on beekeeping. Then, Beckham attended his first-ever state banquet surrounded by royals and Qatari dignitaries at Buckingham Palace in December 2024. But the royal connections do not stop there. Beckham and his wife Victoria have attended not one but two royal weddings. Looking rather suave in a Ralph Lauren morning suit to complement Posh Spice's navy draped dress from her own collection, the ex-England captain stole the show at Prince William and Kate Middleton 's wedding in April 2011. Seven years later, Victoria rocked her own fashion line once again while Beckham opted for a sleek grey suit from Dior as they filed into St George's Chapel to see Prince Harry and Meghan Markle tie the knot in May 2018. Receiving a gold embossed invitation to Harry and Meghan's wedding was a sign of the long friendship between the Beckhams and the Sussexes - but The Mail on Sunday revealed it soon became much less amicable behind the scenes. Beckham was first introduced to Prince William in his capacity as the President of the Football Association (FA). The pair were thrown together to support England's bid to host the 2018 World Cup. United in their love of sport, William and Beckham later attended the London 2012 Olympics together. When asked whether he would call the future king his friend, Beckham told Esquire: 'Yeah, I think I would. It's a very normal relationship. With Harry as well. They're very easy to get along with. They love their sport.' Harry, on the other hand, met Posh Spice before he met Becks. The 13-year-old prince was taken backstage at a Spice Girls performance in South Africa to meet the group. It was his first public appearance after Princess Diana's funeral. Years later, he would strike up his own friendship with the other half of the Beckham pair via his older brother William. Harry and the Manchester United legend were pictured dining and partying in a range of venues - from the fluorescent nightclubs of Las Vegas to the hallowed halls of The Arts Club in London's Chelsea. After one of their nights out in 2012, a source told the Daily Mail: 'Harry and Tom [van Straubenzee] had so much fun with Beckham that they agreed to meet up later that night. 'They were getting along like really old friends. Harry had made plans to see Cirque du Soleil but he and David agreed to hook up later that night at the Arts Club.' It was at the Arts Club that there was an alleged bust-up between Harry and James Corden that Beckham broke up, according to the Daily Mail's Showbusiness Editor Katie Hind. 'The group was pretty large,' a source told the Daily Mail. 'There were some of Harry's friends, some of James' friends and some of David's gang and they all intertwined. 'Then it all kicked off, James was furious. It quickly emerged that Harry had told a joke and James definitely did not find it funny.' Ever the peacemaker, Beckham talked to both sides and reassured Corden that no harm was meant by the cruel comment. And then in 2016, Meghan Markle started dating Prince Harry. The couples initially bonded because Izzy May, Beckham's communications director, was friends with Markus Anderson, chief membership officer for private social club Soho House, who helped arrange Meghan's secret dates with Harry. By all reports, the Beckhams went out of their way to welcome Meghan to the United Kingdom ahead of her very public marriage to the prince. The Beckhams went out of their way to welcome Meghan to the United Kingdom ahead of her very public marriage to the prince It is believed Victoria even gave the American actress access to her little black book of hairdressers and stylists in London. After attending their fairytale wedding in May 2018, Beckham joined the love birds on their tour of Australia. There, they attended the Invictus Games which Harry founded in 2014 and Beckham had become an ambassador of. But the footballer was reportedly ignored by his royal pal at the request of Meghan who 'did not want any competition in the media', according to Tom Bower's biography House of Beckham. In 2023, The Mail on Sunday would report that the Beckhams had been 'Markled' - a word cruelly used by critics of the Suits alum to describe how she is seemingly able to swiftly move on from some of those once closest to her. In the Beckhams' case, there was suspicion the couple may have leaked stories about the Sussexes, an accusation The MoS were told left David 'absolutely bloody furious'. A source close to the Beckhams said: 'David and Victoria went to Meghan and Harry's wedding and were very supportive when Meghan arrived in the UK.' But the accusations, which came in a tense phone call, fractured the Beckham-Sussex friendship. The source added: 'Any making up now is so unlikely.' Victoria Beckham receives an OBE from Prince William in April 2017 The claims reported by the Mail on Sunday story are backed up by Bower's account of the explosive falling out in his book Revenge. 'Harry's instability fed Meghan's fears that friends were leaking stories to the media,' he wrote. 'In particular, she suspected Victoria Beckham of indiscretion. 'Harry called David Beckham to repeat the accusation. Outraged, Beckham's truthful denials damaged their relationship.' But just because the Beckhams are no longer friends with the Sussexes does not mean they aren't spotted with other members of the Royal Family. In February, the pair attended a dinner in celebration of Slow Food at Highgrove where they spoke extensively with King Charles and Camilla. Perhaps a knighthood is on the horizon after all.
