13-02-2025
It's Galentine's Day: Here's how Americans are making – and keeping
Fifteen years ago, Leslie Knope, a character on the hit TV series "Parks and Recreation," introduced a new way of celebrating love: Galentine's Day.
"It's only the best day of the year,' the character played by Amy Pohler said in a 2010 episode. "Every February 13, my lady friends and I leave our husbands and our boyfriends at home, and we just come and kick it breakfast style. Ladies celebrating ladies.'
Fast-forward more than a decade and Galentine's Day – along with the gender neutral Palentine's Day – has become a Hallmark-recognized holiday. It's observed across the U.S. to honor the critical role friendship plays in our lives.
To some, celebrating platonic love with pink and red paraphernalia and gatherings among friends might seem silly. Irene Irving, a psychologist and author of the book 'Best Friends Forever: Surviving A Breakup with Your Best Friend' told USA TODAY some Americans view non-romantic relationships as more "discretionary' parts of their lives.
'It seemed like the last thing on your agenda after your family and your work. It was almost seen as self-indulgent,' she said.
But as self-reported feelings of loneliness have increased in U.S., Irving argued acceptance of the once fictitious holiday points to the importance of non-romantic relationships.
Here's what to know about how Americans are making – and keeping – their friendships this Galentine's Day.
A July 2024 report published by The American Friendship Project found that people today have a similar number of friends as they did a half-century ago.
Americans, on average, have four or five friends, according to the multi-year survey fielded between 2022 and 2023 among nearly 6,000 adults. More than 92% of participants reported having at least one friend.
More: What is Galentine's Day? Ideas for celebrating the Valentine's Day alternative with your besties
Natalie Pennington, one of the co-authors of the study, suggested the average number of friends has remained stagnant because of something called Dunbar's number. The theory by British anthropologist Robin Dunbar asserts humans can only handle about 150 relationships at one time and only about 5 close loved ones.
'Seeing that people have kind of similar network sizes points to that capacity we have for connection,' Pennington said.
Though Americans have generally reported similar numbers of friends in recent years, experts say loneliness has worsened. In 2023, the U.S. surgeon general's office released an advisory calling loneliness and isolation an epidemic.
So how have Americans maintained a similar number of friends over the last 50 years while also reporting record levels of loneliness?
One potential issue: While most Americans – 75% – surveyed by the American Friendship Project said they were satisfied with their number of friends, more than 40% said they didn't feel as close as they'd like. More than half weren't satisfied with the amount of time they spent with friends.
That's not surprising. Americans on average are spending less time today with their friends than in the past.
Data from the American Time Study, conducted annually by the Bureau of Labor Statistics, shows that between 2003 and 2013 Americans spent an average of 7 hours a week with friends. By 2021, that dwindled to less than three hours a week.
Pennington suggested the disconnect in closeness could be a result of people not prioritizing their relationships – whether because of competing obligations, like work, or other cultural factors, such as the rise in social media usage. The COVID-19 pandemic also recently played a role in limiting the amount of time people were able to spend with their friends in person.
Typically, people meet their closest lifelong friends through work and school, said Levine, who founded the Friendship Blog.
But the COVID-19 pandemic closed those spaces for years. Some workplaces shut down permanently, shrinking the areas people could go to find new face-to-face connections.
Finding new friends has become more challenging for many. About half of respondents to the American Friendship Project survey said they found it difficult to make new friends.
That doesn't mean kids aren't meeting their best friends on the playground – or that American adults aren't making lasting friends at all. After all, about 75% of adults who say they have multiple close friends told the Pew Research Center in a report published last month that they connect with buddies at least a few times a week, whether online, via text and call or in person.
Digital sites like Bumble BFF and Meetup have also sought to close the gap by helping people find each other where they are – online. Experts told USA TODAY the sites have become so-called 'third place' meeting spots, or social locations outside of home and work for people to make initial connections.
Danielle Bayard Jackson, author of 'Fighting for our Friendships: The Science and Art of Conflict and Connection in Women's Relationships,' said those friendship-making apps are 'meeting the moment,' particularly for Generation Z and other young Americans. The apps, Jackson said, help young people forge new relationships that they can quickly transition from the digital sphere to real life.
For instance, Meetup, which connects people through shared hobbies, said it saw a 37% uptick in event registrations between January 2021 and 2023. A survey commissioned by Bumble in 2023 found that 66% of Gen Z respondents said they met their friends online, compared to 38% across age groups who said the same.
Hunter Hamrick was among those who tested out online apps to make friends in 2023. In January of that year, Hamrick, now 32, created a Dungeons and Dragons group on Meetup for people in the Washington area. A contractor for the Federal Emergency Management Agency, Hamrick said he was hoping at the time to fulfill a New Years resolution of making more friends.
When it began, Hamrick said the group had 20 to 30 people – some of whom were friends he had asked to join so he 'didn't look like a social pariah.' This year, Hamrick said the group surpassed 2,000 members.
The gaming group has allowed him and his partner to expand their social circle and 'strengthen bonds' with people they already knew. They even recently attended the wedding of somebody they met playing Dungeons and Dragons.
'It's been really cool to see groups of people meet at the happy hours, and now, like, they're really good friends,' Hamrick said. 'People are just like, looking for an excuse to socialize.'
This article originally appeared on USA TODAY: What is Galentine's Day? What to know about friendships in the US
