Latest news with #BethanyCook
Yahoo
26-05-2025
- Entertainment
- Yahoo
10 Scary Movies For Kids That Promise Age-Appropriate Thrills (Without Tears)
Sometimes you need to stir the pot a little on family movie night, and scary movies are a great way to do that. Still, nobody wants to traumatize their children with anything truly terrifying, and it's not always easy to gauge how intense a movie is going to be until you're far enough into it that you've already signed your kid up for some nightmares. For this reason, I've compiled a list of scary movies for kids based on my own personal favorites, as well as parent recommendations from the PureWow team, so you can settle on a nail-biting flick that's just right for your family. And for good measure, I also tapped a family therapist for her advice on how to introduce your kid to scary movies without, you know, totally traumatizing them. Dr. Bethany Cook, PsyD, MT-BC, is a licensed clinical psychologist and author of For What It's Worth: A Perspective on How to Thrive and Survive Parenting. She's a sought after therapist and quoted media expert who brings accessible, real-world guidance to families of all socioeconomic and mental health backgrounds, based on over 20 years of clinical experience in the field. The expert tells me that determining the age-appropriateness of a scary movie for kids really comes down to being attuned to your child, since all kids have different temperaments and find different things 'scary.' Per Dr. Cook, 'the most important thing is to first ask yourself why you are looking for a scary movie for kids…because parents oftentimes are the ones who want to watch these types of movies because they themselves find them more entertaining.' In other words, honestly assess the situation and confirm that a scary movie is actually something your child is expressing interest in. Once you've done that, the expert recommends starting with movies that are really more silly than scary for the under eight crowd, because they tend to be more sensitive. 'For that age group, I would avoid anything with really evil characters or even a lot of suspenseful music and a very unsettling atmosphere,' she says. Indeed, the psychologist explains that the brains of adults and children are similar in that when we watch a movie, we temporarily suspend our ability to differentiate between fantasy and reality. Scary movies are thrilling because when we're watching them, our brains really believe that what's happening on the screen is real; the difference is that children's brains have not developed the emotional regulation skills to bounce back from that in the same way adults' brains can, so they are at much higher risk of having a really traumatizing viewing experience. For this reason, Dr. Cook says it's important to let your child know that it's OK to feel scared at any age—grown-ups do sometimes, too—and that the moment they stop enjoying the movie, it will go off. After all, if it's not fun anymore, what's the point? To that end, parents should also pay close attention because you can't necessarily count on your child to come out and tell you that they've had enough; if you get the feeling your kid is finding the movie overwhelming, it's really up to you to make the call and turn it off. Director: Adrian Molina, Lee Unkrich Cast: Anthony Gonzalez. Gael Garcia Bernal, Benjamin Bratt, Alanna Ubach Rating: PG Run Time: 109 minutes Educational Value: positive family messages, diverse representations, strong cultural themes 'Coco can be scary because the entire animated film is about death and where we go when we die, The Land of the Dead. That said, it's not a horror film in the slightest. It's about family, ancestors, music and closure! It's a really beautiful movie with lovely music,' says Executive Editor Dara Katz. Indeed, this movie has a murder theme built into the plot, and though the messages about family and cultural heritage are far more profound than the somewhat morbid aspects of the storyline, it's best to take your child's sensitivity and maturity into account before viewing. watch on disney+ Director: Tim Burton Cast: Martin Short, Winona Ryder, Catherine O'Hara, Martin Landau Rating: PG Run Time: 87 minutes Educational Value: depictions of grief combined with family support, positive messages about friendship and bravery, scientific themes for curious minds VP of Editorial Content, Candace Davison, explains that his family favorite is 'dark and creepy, yet not so scary, [and] a fairly safe bet. It deals with the death of a pet, and the lengths a kid will go to bring the pet back, but it's more campy and quirky than sad. With its black-and-white format, it draws on the moodiness and stylings of horror, without being gory or horrifying.' In other words, if you like the eerie and artsy stylings of Tim Burton, but want to keep outright fear to a minimum, this one is a great choice. watch on disney+ Director: Jules Bass, Arthur Rankin, Jr. Cast: Mia Farrow, Jeff Bridges, Alan Arkin, Angela Lansbury, Christopher Lee Rating: G Run Time: 92 minutes Educational Value: positive messages about loyalty, friendship, resourcefulness and courage. I am completely biased here because I was obsessed with this movie when I was five years old and my love for it hasn't waned over the years. (In fact, I have watched it multiple times with my own kids and even rewatch it on my own with some frequency.) As the title suggests, the story is about a unicorn who believes that she's the last of her kind and thus goes out in search of others like her. She collects a couple friends along the way who help her with her quest to rescue the rest of the unicorns from the bitter and deranged king who has been keeping them hostage. There are a couple pretty intense scenes and a few more that aren't necessarily scary, but definitely creepy. Still, the voice acting is amazing, the story is full of magic and the soundtrack, courtesy of America, will play in your head on repeat. watch on prime video Director: Henry Selick Cast: Danny Elfman, Chris Sarandon, Catherine O'Hara, Paul Reubens Rating: PG Run Time: 75 minutes Educational Value: lessons about consequences and making thoughtful decisions, positive messages that encourage gratitude for what you have Jack Skellington is the very recognizable star of this beloved movie, which feels festively scary whether watched at Halloween or Christmas. How could that be, you ask? Well, the plot is about a very well-meaning skeleton who, disillusioned with his life as Halloweentown's 'Pumpkin King,' stumbles upon another magical holiday world and decides he'd like to co-opt Christmas. Alas, he discovers that sometimes it's best to stick with (and be grateful for) what you already have. Expect an excellent soundtrack, beautiful stop-motion animation and only mild scares from this whimsical Tim Burton story, which multiple members of PureWow's editorial team vouch for below. 'I don't know how or why my husband introduced our 2-year-old to The Nightmare Before Christmas when he did, but it's kinda neutralized skeletons for us. Instead of being scared of freaky skeleton decorations on Halloween, our daughter will yell, 'It's Jack Skellington!' The original music also makes it a little less scary. She chants along to 'This Is Halloween,' and it actually sounds creepy and the movie kind of scares me, but the important thing is that she is not scared,' says Dara Katz. Oh, and PureWow's Senior Director Rachel Bowie agrees: 'I am all for The Nightmare Before Christmas. My 7-year-old is obsessed and has loved it since he was five-years-old,' she says, noting that 'the songs are a great entry point and help to temper anything fearful.' watch on disney+ Director: Mike Newell Cast: Daniel Radcliffe, Emma Watson, Rupert Grint, Robert Pattinson, Ralph Fiennes Rating: PG-13 Run Time: 157 minutes Educational Value: positive messages about morality, honesty, integrity, friendship and courage 'I'd recommend all the Harry Potter Movies but specifically Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire,' says Editor-in-Chief Jillian Quint, adding that she 'would argue this is the scariest Harry Potter book, and the movie is similarly scary (but doable for kids in the 8+ range) thanks to the presence of dragons, dementors and a truly terrifying Voldemort.' Having read the book and watched the movie with my kids (ages seven and nine at the time), I can say that it is a pretty scary movie but reading the book first definitely takes the edge off of some of the more gruesome aspects of the storyline. watch on max Director: Henry Selick Cast: Dakota Fanning, Teri Hatcher, Jennifer Saunders, Ian McShane Rating: PG Run Time: 100 minutes Educational Value: themes about self-control and compassion; positive messages about accepting imperfect families. 'I've heard a lot of people recommend Coraline because my daughter loved The Nightmare Before Christmas so much, but I'd say proceed with caution—and maybe wait until your kid is eight or nine. My 7-year-old niece loves the movie, but my 6-year-old bursts into tears at the sight of the movie poster after seeing just a clip. The Other Mother and Other World concepts really freaked her out,' says Davison. I've seen the movie with my kids and we all found it very disturbing because of the way the parents are portrayed and the general creepy factor of the whole thing, so I have to second that warning. watch on prime video Director: Jim Henson, Frank Oz Cast: Dave Goelz, Frank Oz, Jim Henson, Lisa Maxwell Rating: PG Run Time: 95 minutes Educational Value: positive messages about teamwork, friendship, empathy and courage; laden with moral lessons This BAFTA Award nominee is a cult classic (and one of my childhood favorites) for good reason…but don't expect Sesame Street vibes from this Jim Henson flick. The themes are dark and somewhat adult-oriented. (The movie basically revolves around a war between a corrupt race that wants to control and exploit and a well, good one, that wants to restore peace and balance.) As such, this movie is best suited for slightly older children. Still, I watched it with my 7- and 9-year-old kids and while there were some uneasy, anxious moments due to the eeriness of the puppetry and the dangerous, otherworldly setting, they both really enjoyed the fantasy elements and the moral conflicts that unfolded. watch on prime video Director: Steven Spielberg Cast: Laura Dern, Jeff Goldblum, Sam Neill, Ariana Richards, Richard Attenborough Rating: PG-13 Run Time: 122 minutes Educational Value: positive messages about courage, resourcefulness; plotline can prompt conversations that help kids distinguish science-fiction from real science For those who aren't familiar with this iconic 90s film, Jurassic Park is about a group of scientists and their overly-ambitious plan to open a theme park using the revolutionary advances they've made in their effort to bring back dinosaurs from extinction. Needless to say, the theme park experiment goes awry—the test group is small, but a young brother and sister duo are among the first visitors—and lots of sharp-toothed terror and carnage ensues. I watched this movie with my kids just last week and they were definitely on the edge of their seats, but it was just the right degree of scary for them (i.e., we didn't have to turn it off). Quint watched the movie with her slightly younger kids and all was well: 'I showed this movie to my then 7-year-old, and I don't regret it. Yes, the dinosaurs are scary as hell, but I love that it's a film where the kids have agency, and everything works out in the end. (I did have to warn my daughter about the lawyer getting eaten off the toilet.)' And yeah, the eaten-off-the-toilet scene is one of the scarier parts in the movie…but depending on the kid they also might just think it's downright hilarious. watch on prime video Director: Hayao Miyazaki Cast: Rumi Hiiragi, Daveigh Chase, Jason Marsden, Tara Strong, Mari Natsuki Rating: PG Run Time: 125 minutes Educational Value: positive messages about kindness, selflessness, familial love, courage and perseverance; moral themes relating to the negative consequences of greed Parents should know that this visually beautiful and award-winning anime film from Hayao Miyazake has some elements that younger and/or more sensitive viewers might find too upsetting. For starters, the 10-year-old girl at the center of the whimsical fantasy story is left on her own to deal with considerable peril from very early on in the movie, due to the fact that bad magic at the abandoned amusement park they stumbled upon resulted in her parents being turned into pigs. (Yep, you read that right.) I have watched this with my kids and we all loved it, but the scene in which the parents turn into pigs is quite grotesque and disturbing; it also forms the foundation of the adventure that follows. Still, it's a riveting film with wonderful animation, an incredibly creative storyline and a young, female main character who is, by all accounts, an excellent role model. watch on max Director: Joe Johnston Cast: Robin Williams, Kirsten Dunst, Bonnie Hunt, Bradley Pierce Rating: PG Run Time: 100 minutes Educational Value: positive messages about courage, teamwork and problem solving Jumanji is not your ordinary board game—namely because it forces players to live out all the very terrifying perils built into the game (and I'm not talking about having to sell your boardwalk property back to the bank). Indeed, this action-adventure is full of thrills—in fact the peril is completely relentless and leaves little room for depth or narrative quality. Still, if you're looking for an age-appropriate scary movie that will keep your tween on the edge of their seat, this movie certainly delivers plenty of excitement and entertainment. (For what it's worth, my own kids eventually grew weary of the onslaught and I think would have preferred a side of substance to go with the scares.) watch on hulu The 83 Best Family Movies of All Time
Yahoo
24-05-2025
- Health
- Yahoo
How to Manage Intrusive Thoughts As a Parent, According to a Therapist
Ever imagined yourself doing something pretty distasteful, like that time someone cut you off on the highway and you had visions of running them off the road? Or perhaps your brain prefers to torment you with incessant doubts and worries (think: 'everyone at work secretly hates me' or 'did I really lock the front door?'). Whatever the case may be, you're likely suffering from intrusive thoughts—and you're in good company, because pretty much everyone has them. That said, parents are particularly vulnerable to intrusive thoughts, which is why I tapped a mental health expert to learn more about these pesky, unwanted ideas. Without further ado, here's how to manage intrusive thoughts as a parent, according to a mental health expert and a mom-of-two. Dr. Bethany Cook, PsyD, MT-BC, is a licensed clinical psychologist and author of For What It's Worth: A Perspective on How to Thrive and Survive Parenting. She's a sought after therapist and quoted media expert who brings accessible, real-world guidance to families of all socioeconomic and mental health backgrounds, based on over 20 years of clinical experience in the field. She is also a mother-of-two. You can probably surmise from the term that intrusive thoughts are unwanted and, well, unpleasant. Or, as Dr. Cook explains, 'Intrusive thoughts are like annoying and unwelcome 'pop‑up' ads in your mind. They are fleeting, involuntary flashes of images, ideas, or impulses that feel completely at odds with how you see yourself and the values you live by.' If you experience intrusive thoughts from time-to-time, you're not alone. Per the expert, 'almost everyone has intrusive thoughts—like picturing yourself tripping the person in front of you or blurting out something outrageous in church, for example—yet we rarely admit to having them, since they clash with the persona we present to the world.' It's worth nothing that there's nothing inherently pathological about having these thoughts, provided you don't act on them. OK, so we know that pretty much everyone has intrusive thoughts and pretty much no one relishes them…so why are they happening, you ask? To understand where intrusive thoughts come from, Dr. Cook says to 'think of your brain as a 24/7 'what‑if' generatorconstantly scanning past experiences, future possibilities and potential threats.' The expert also notes that, most of the time, this activity happens unconsciously; however, this behind-the-scenes work can sometimes slip into your consciousness in the form of intrusive thoughts, particularly if your brain is overloaded. The expert emphasizes that intrusive thoughts aren't evidence of secret desires (you don't really want to act on your road rage), but rather 'the byproduct of a brain that's endlessly brainstorming possibilities, tagging anything weird or risky, and sometimes forgetting to hit the mute button on thoughts you'd rather ignore.' There are a lot of different reasons why your brain might become so overwhelmed that these nagging thoughts creep to the surface without your permission, but the responsibilities of parenthood can certainly create a perfect storm. 'Becoming a parent flips your brain's 'what-if' switch to high‑alert, which means your amygdala now treats threats to your child as existential crises,' explains Dr. Cook, adding that, 'if you didn't have intrusive thoughts before parenthood you might start having them, and even if you'd had intrusive thoughts before, parenthood can bring a new set of themes, intensity and (higher) stakes.' In other words, protecting our young is a biological imperative and our brains are hardwired for the task. Dr. Cook also tells me that you can easily distinguish parenting-related intrusive thoughts from the garden variety type, since the experience of having parenting-related intrusive thoughts typically fits the following profile: Child‑centered content: Whereas you might once have worried about tripping someone in line, parenting intrusive thoughts often involve accidentally dropping your baby, leaving them in harm's way or, even more distressing, imagining abusive scenarios. Heightened moral alarm: Your 'inner moral seismograph' registers any thought about child harm as though there is intent, magnifying guilt and shame. As a result, you're less likely to chalk these thoughts up to random brain noise. Stress, sleep deprivation and hormones: Those sleepless nights and hormonal shifts (especially postpartum) weaken mental filters, which means that stray 'what‑if' flashes slip in more easily and feel impossible to shake. Perceived personal failure: As a parent, one of my deepest fears is failing my child—and I know I'm not the only one. Intrusive thoughts exploit that fear, convincing you that having the thought somehow makes you a bad parent, when really it's just your protective instincts in overdrive. Social silence: Because no one admits to picturing their infant in peril, parents often suffer in isolation, believing they're alone in this—even though up to 80 percent of new parents report unwanted child‑related thoughts, the expert notes. One more time for those in the back: 'Intrusive parenting thoughts aren't a sign of danger to your child; they're the byproduct of a stressed-out brain that's constantly reevaluating all perceived risk and wired for protection.' By frequently reminding yourself of this fact, you will be able to recognize them as 'false news' when they occur and, as a result, reclaim confidence in your parenting faster. With that in mind, here are five expert-approved strategies for keeping intrusive thoughts at bay and managing them in the moment: Remind yourself: 'My brain is overprotective, not malicious.' Then, write yourself a quick note—something to the tune of, 'I'm a loving parent, not a danger to my child'—and tuck it in your pocket or phone so you can revisit it when you need a quick refocus. Ask: 'What's the real likelihood this will happen? What evidence do I have?' Often you'll find you've been batting at shadows. Replace the doom scenario with a realistic outcome: 'I am being careful and I am being safe; I know that I'm not going to drop my baby.' (For what it's worth, this strategy helps with all manner of anxiety and fears. My 10-year-old daughter has used it to overcome her fear of elevators, and I just used it to hush my intrusive thoughts about the airplane I was on crashing.) That's right, friends—it's time we stop being so buttoned-up about the intrusive thoughts we have. I'll start: When my kids were infants I sometimes imagined the stroller rolling into oncoming traffic. I would also have a flash of myself accidentally bashing my baby's head into the sharp edge of a dresser when I turned the corner with her in my arms. Now, I see flashes of cars colliding with us when we cross the street to school. (Fun stuff, right?) The point is, it's important to talk about these thoughts with a trusted friend, partner or therapist. 'Once out in the open, they lose their sting—and odds are, your fellow parents have a few uninvited brain‑gatecrashers of their own,' says Dr. Cook. If you've never heard of cloud-watching before, it's a pretty simple and effective self-soothing strategy. Here's how it works: Sit quietly for 30 seconds and imagine each thought as a passing cloud. Notice its shape, notice it fade, then bring your focus back to your breath—no chasing, no wrestling—just calm and neutral observation of your inner life and a return to meditative breathing. There's no cure for worrying. It will happen and, as previously mentioned, it happens for a biological reason. Instead of fighting and repressing it such that the worry sneaks up on you when you least expect it, the expert advises that you 'set aside ten minutes each day—ideally not right before bedtime—to let every worry flood in. Then close the door on it. Your brain will learn there's a time and place for these worries, and it won't ring your mental alarm bell all day.' And on that note, I'm going to dim the lights, set a timer and spend the next ten minutes thinking about every tragedy that could befall my family. Once that's out of the way, the sounds of spring coming from my window will probably be the perfect soundtrack for some cloud-watching. The Top 5 Things Kids Worry About, According to Child Therapists
