Latest news with #DamonaHoffman
Yahoo
25-05-2025
- General
- Yahoo
What Are 'Pink Flags' In Relationships?
There's a lot of talk of 'flags' in dating and relationships. Perhaps the most common ― red flags ― refer to signs of toxic behavior or clear incompatibility in a partner. Think: love-bombing, being rude to waitstaff and trying to control and manipulate your every move. Green flags, on the other hand, are signs of a good partner. You might have found a keeper if you communicate well and feel comfortable being yourself around them, for example. But there's another flag color that falls in the middle of the spectrum: pink flags. Below, relationship experts explain how to recognize pink flags and what to do about them. 'Pink flags are subtle indicators that you might not be a fit in a relationship,' said Damona Hoffman, an OkCupid dating coach and host of 'The Dates & Mates Podcast.' She noted that they're not as overt as red flags, which tend to be compatibility and behavioral issues that anyone can recognize as problematic. But even though pink flags are less serious, it's important to address these minor problems, rather than let them fester. 'Pink flags are the kind of warning signs that you can talk yourself out of and overlook until they become red,' Hoffman explained. 'Alternatively, you can also make pink flags into relationship dealbreakers when they were simply subtle differences that could have been worked through.' Alysha Jeney, a therapist and owner of Modern Love Counseling in Denver, similarly emphasized the importance of recognizing pink flags when they arise. 'Pink flags could be something that you intuitively sense is a bit off, but you're trying to give the relationship time to determine its severity,' she said. 'They can also be trigger points from past relationships that you want to be mindful of. Pink flags are important to make note of in relationships and be used as a point of reflection.' Pink flags come in many forms that vary from relationship to relationship, but there are some common examples. 'One that I hear clients discuss is a person who has limited opinions on things ― for example, never has an opinion or doesn't care where you eat, what you go do, etc.,' said Liz Higgins, a relational therapist and founder of Millennial Life Counseling. 'Another is differences in political or religious belief systems.' Being messy or not texting often enough can be everyday pink flags as well. While these issues aren't automatic dealbreakers, they shouldn't be swept under the rug either. 'Some pink flags that should be observed are changes in behavior,' said Mabel Yiu, a marriage and family therapist and CEO of Women's Therapy Institute. 'As an example, if they used to be affectionate, but they have become less so over time.' Pay attention if your physical relationship has changed or you've stopped being intentional about dating and growing as a couple. 'Another pink flag is unmatched love languages, such as acts of service and physical touch,' Yiu said. 'This is not a serious issue if both partners are willing to pull closer and accommodate another's love language.' Sarah Weisberg, a licensed psychologist and founder of Potomac Therapy Group, stressed the importance of taking note of your own thoughts and behaviors, as well as your partner's. 'When we notice ourselves deliberately or inadvertently hurting others, it's important to take a step back and ask ourselves what's going on,' she said. 'What could this be telling us about our conscious or unconscious feelings about the relationship? In these instances we might need to do some work on ourselves, listen to our intuition and have some hard conversations.' Still, what's a red flag to one person might actually be a pink ― or even green ― flag for you. 'One person's too much texting is another person's just right,' Hoffman said. 'You need to figure out what your needs and wants are in a relationship and be able to communicate that to your partner. Use pink flags as a signifier that you need to get more information rather than a signifier that the relationship is doomed.' 'Pink flags are easier to ignore and thus potentially more damaging than red flags,' said Tracy Ross, a licensed clinical social worker specializing in couples and family therapy. 'Sometimes pink flags feel subtle ― you don't catch them the first or even the second time ― as opposed to red flags that are obvious if you let yourself see them. But if something nags at you repeatedly, it's time to pay attention.' She recommended asking yourself, 'Is this workable, is this person willing to work with me, willing to communicate, work through things together? If I express my concerns, do they hear me and take in what I'm saying?' A pink flag could turn out to be the indicator that leads you to discover a red flag. In the process of exploring a pink flag, you might find that your partner isn't willing to figure things out together. 'Every relationship has that dance and has to find that balance,' Ross said. 'Pink flags are those things that make you question whether or not it will be possible, red flags are the areas where you find out it won't be.' She cautioned against confusing pink flags with just having the unrealistic expectation that your partner will meet each and every one of your needs. Instead, focus on feeling complete in yourself while identifying what is important to you in a partner. 'One sure way to understand the difference between pink flags and red flags is to give serious and honest thought to what you want in a relationship ― do an inventory of your 'must haves,' your 'nonnegotiables,' and your 'would be nice ifs,'' Ross explained. 'If you spend time reflecting on that in advance and know what you are looking for ― what you can and cannot compromise on ― then it will be much more clear when you see an actual flag.' 'Regardless of whether it's a pink flag or a red flag, the most important thing is not to ignore it,' Ross said. 'The discomfort or uncertainty surrounding these issues often leads to avoidance, and all kinds of relationship issues grow from avoidance.' Rather than letting things simmer unaddressed, take the time to process the pink flags you observe. Then, talk about them. 'I would say knowing your safe spaces to explore these notions is important: with a therapist, a trusted friend, a safe relationship, especially if you're in the beginning stages of dating,' Higgins said. 'Sometimes it's more appropriate to wait a bit before putting every last thing out on the table. In a newer relationship, the bond isn't as structured or secure, so bringing up a lot of super important things right away may not work as effectively. Balance is key.' Consider why you might be feeling concerned or uncomfortable, and if it's possibly part of a bigger issue you that need to work through on your own or together. Sit with it and think about whether you're making assumptions or projecting. 'Pink flags might also give you an opportunity to communicate with your partner(s), and how you do so can in itself determine if the relationship is one you want to continue with,' said Rachel Needle, a licensed psychologist and the co-director of Modern Sex Therapy Institutes. 'Regardless of whether an issue is big or small, it is important in any relationship that you are able to communicate about it in a healthy way, and feel comfortable expressing your feelings and concerns.' She also advised acknowledging the positive aspects of the relationship. Focus on communicating honestly to see if the pink flag issue is nonnegotiable, or if it's something that you can accept or reach middle a ground on instead. 'It's important to pay attention to pink flags but not to be obsessed with them or let them overtake your relationship,' added Hoffman. 'They are simply things to keep an eye on or concerns you should get curious about.' 6 Little Green Flags That You've Found A Keeper What Exactly Is A 'Situationship'? As An Asian American Woman, This Is The Dating App Red Flag I Don't Talk About
Yahoo
24-05-2025
- Lifestyle
- Yahoo
Experts Are Sharing The 7 Things Your Date Immediately Notices About You, And Its Need-To-Know Info For Your Next Coffee Or Dinner Date
Meeting potential romantic interests can be flirty and exciting, but it can also make you feel anxious and insecure — so it's easy to get in your head. You might be the type of person who stresses about every minute detail of your appearance, personality and turns of phrase. But why waste energy worrying about things your date probably won't pick up on, let alone care about, anyway? Below, dating experts and daters reveal the things your date is likely — and unlikely — to notice right off the bat. Read on for their thoughts: 1. Your body language. According to dating coach Damona Hoffman, the way you position your body will signal to your date whether you're interested in them or not. 'Usually someone will turn their hips towards someone they like, lean in when they are talking and look for opportunities to touch them in casual zones,' Hoffman, author of 'F the Fairy Tale: Rewrite the Dating Myths and Live Your Own Love Story,' told HuffPost. Posture is also something your date will take notice of. Are you standing up straight with your head held high or are you slumped over with your head hanging down? 'The former signals confidence, the latter lack thereof, and confidence is all-important when making a great first impression with someone new,' dating coach Blaine Anderson told HuffPost. 'To have better posture, by the way, don't just pull your shoulders back. You'll look unnatural. Engage your glutes and core more when you're standing and seated — everything else falls into place when you do this.' Kaylyn G., a member of the HuffPost Facebook community, said she always notices how a date carries themself. 'How they walk. How they get a waiter's attention. How they sit in the chair,' she wrote. 2. Your facial expressions. 'Do you make and hold eye contact, and are you authentically smiling?' Anderson said. 'Or are your eyes evasive and you look ill-at-ease? Again, the former signals confidence and the latter lack thereof.' Nick Notas, a dating coach who works with men, also underscored why eye contact is so important. 'Looking into someone's eyes helps create a sense of connection,' he said. 'Avoiding eye contact can make her feel distant from you and set an awkward tone.' Similarly, a warm smile can 'go a long way towards diffusing tension on a date,' Hoffman said. 'A smile says that you feel comfortable with them, that you're having a good time and that they can relax around you.' To make a good first impression, online dating coach Joshua Pompey of Next Evolution Matchmaking suggested 'creating the aura of someone who is happy and excited about life' by approaching your date with a smile, enthusiasm and open body language. 'This will increase the odds that your date is instantly put into a positive state of mind as well, filled with excitement and positive energy,' he said. 3. Your grooming and hygiene. Your pre-date ritual should include basic tasks like taking a shower, brushing your teeth and combing your hair — it's not much to ask, and your date will certainly appreciate it. 'Things like a trimmed beard, groomed eyebrows and fresh breath show pride in your appearance,' Notas said. 'Dirty fingernails or body odors suggest a lack of self-awareness.' Anderson added: 'Do you look like you take care of your skin and hair, and do you smell good, if subtly so?' Renata M. wrote on Facebook that good hygiene always stands out to her in a date. 'A well-groomed person with good manners shows he has self-respect and respect for others,' she said. 'Everything else can be worked on or brushed off, unless he is married or jobless.' 4. Your outfit. Just make sure you're dressed appropriately for the setting. You don't want to be overdressed in a three-piece suit at a pub or underdressed in some ratty old T-shirt at an upscale restaurant. 'Being well-dressed is less about wearing expensive clothing and more about wearing the right clothes for the occasion,' Anderson said. 'To illustrate this, business casual might be perfect for your office, but it's inappropriately stuffy for most first dates. It should go without saying, but your clothes — and shoes especially — should look clean!' 5. How much you talk about yourself. Does the conversation have a nice back-and-forth, or is it very one-sided? If your date can't get a word in edgewise, that's a problem. 'Do they listen or just talk about themselves?' reader Mary C. wrote on Facebook. Reader Cayci C. said she pays attention to whether 'they talk with me and not at me.' And for reader Louise P., it's not just how much the date talks about themself, it's also what they're saying. 'If they say their last partner was 'crazy,' if they start future-faking immediately, if they talk about money immediately ― spot the red flags,' she said. 6. Your manners and how you treat your server. If your first date is at a bar or restaurant, you'd better believe your date is going to notice how politely you interact with the people who work there. It 'screams volumes about someone's character,' Shanna M. wrote on Facebook. Reader Kerri D. said she also pays attention to behaviors like whether her date opens the door for her or asks her where she wants to sit. 'None of these things are required or dealbreakers in any way, it just tells me a lot about their personality and how OK they might be with mine,' she wrote on Facebook. 'I am hella awkward and need a bit of space and time to 'warm up' to someone. ... I have no problem giving people the benefit of the doubt for the same reason. But a lot of very simple behaviors can hint at compatibility.' 7. How you make them feel. Your date might not walk away from the evening remembering the color of your eyes or your exact facial features, Hoffman said. They will, however, remember how you made them feel. 'Was something said that creeped them out? Or made them lean in? Focusing on the atmosphere and feeling of connection is more important than choosing the perfect dress or tie,' she said. And here's what your date probably won't notice. There's no sense fixating on things your date is unlikely to pick up on anyway. According to our experts, that includes the following: Minor physical 'flaws' You might be self-conscious about perceived imperfections like a 'crooked tooth, a few extra pounds or a small scar,' said Notas. But your date probably isn't focusing on any of that — and neither should you. 'Unless it's something really obvious, your date isn't zeroing in on minor details,' he said. 'She's focused on your overall vibe and how you make her feel.' Same goes for pimples or blemishes, Anderson said. Not a big deal! 'Everyone gets the occasional zit. Unless you have one that dominates your face, you're better off not calling attention to it and just enjoying your date,' she said. How fancy your clothes are Your date probably isn't going to be paying close attention to your particular wardrobe choices. You want the overall look to be put-together — but beyond that, the specifics don't matter all that much. 'I hear a lot of emphasis on not only what to wear, but on which brands to choose, yet rarely do I hear a report from a client that they liked a date because of the brands or specific clothing items they wore,' Hoffman said. 'Usually they'll notice if someone is dressed poorly or if the clothes are worn, but other than that, labels don't tend to matter on a first date.' Your outfit choice probably isn't going to tank a date as long as it's appropriate for the setting. 'If your clothes look clean and fitted, she'll walk away with a positive impression about your style,' Notas said. Your exact turns of phrase When it comes to communication, your demeanor, interest in your date and tone of voice will do a lot of the heavy lifting. The exact words you use are less important. 'While you obviously want to avoid profanity or insensitive language, what matters is your ability to listen and the flow of conversation,' Notas said. 'How you say something is so much more important than what you say.' The good news: The vast majority of the things your date will notice about you right off the bat are '100% in your control and free or inexpensive to improve,' Anderson said. Her advice? 'Focus on being your most present, best self when you meet your date, versus worrying about any more minor details, like which of two shirts to wear,' she added. 'I always recommend my clients do something that makes them feel awesome — like go to the gym or watch a comedy special — before going on a date to make the best first impression.' This article originally appeared on HuffPost.
Buzz Feed
24-05-2025
- Lifestyle
- Buzz Feed
Here Are 7 Things Your Date Notices About You Immediately
Meeting potential romantic interests can be flirty and exciting, but it can also make you feel anxious and insecure — so it's easy to get in your head. You might be the type of person who stresses about every minute detail of your appearance, personality and turns of phrase. But why waste energy worrying about things your date probably won't pick up on, let alone care about, anyway? Below, dating experts and daters reveal the things your date is likely — and unlikely — to notice right off the bat. Read on for their thoughts: 1. Your body language. According to dating coach Damona Hoffman, the way you position your body will signal to your date whether you're interested in them or not. 'Usually someone will turn their hips towards someone they like, lean in when they are talking and look for opportunities to touch them in casual zones,' Hoffman, author of 'F the Fairy Tale: Rewrite the Dating Myths and Live Your Own Love Story,' told HuffPost. Posture is also something your date will take notice of. Are you standing up straight with your head held high or are you slumped over with your head hanging down? 'The former signals confidence, the latter lack thereof, and confidence is all-important when making a great first impression with someone new,' dating coach Blaine Anderson told HuffPost. 'To have better posture, by the way, don't just pull your shoulders back. You'll look unnatural. Engage your glutes and core more when you're standing and seated — everything else falls into place when you do this.' Kaylyn G., a member of the HuffPost Facebook community, said she always notices how a date carries themself. 'How they walk. How they get a waiter's attention. How they sit in the chair,' she wrote. 'Do you make and hold eye contact, and are you authentically smiling?' Anderson said. 'Or are your eyes evasive and you look ill-at-ease? Again, the former signals confidence and the latter lack thereof.' Nick Notas, a dating coach who works with men, also underscored why eye contact is so important. 'Looking into someone's eyes helps create a sense of connection,' he said. 'Avoiding eye contact can make her feel distant from you and set an awkward tone.' Similarly, a warm smile can 'go a long way towards diffusing tension on a date,' Hoffman said. 'A smile says that you feel comfortable with them, that you're having a good time and that they can relax around you.' To make a good first impression, online dating coach Joshua Pompey of Next Evolution Matchmaking suggested 'creating the aura of someone who is happy and excited about life' by approaching your date with a smile, enthusiasm and open body language. 'This will increase the odds that your date is instantly put into a positive state of mind as well, filled with excitement and positive energy,' he said. 3. Your grooming and hygiene. Your pre-date ritual should include basic tasks like taking a shower, brushing your teeth and combing your hair — it's not much to ask, and your date will certainly appreciate it. 'Things like a trimmed beard, groomed eyebrows and fresh breath show pride in your appearance,' Notas said. 'Dirty fingernails or body odors suggest a lack of self-awareness.' Anderson added: 'Do you look like you take care of your skin and hair, and do you smell good, if subtly so?' Renata M. wrote on Facebook that good hygiene always stands out to her in a date. 'A well-groomed person with good manners shows he has self-respect and respect for others,' she said. 'Everything else can be worked on or brushed off, unless he is married or jobless.' 4. Your outfit. Just make sure you're dressed appropriately for the setting. You don't want to be overdressed in a three-piece suit at a pub or underdressed in some ratty old T-shirt at an upscale restaurant. 'Being well-dressed is less about wearing expensive clothing and more about wearing the right clothes for the occasion,' Anderson said. 'To illustrate this, business casual might be perfect for your office, but it's inappropriately stuffy for most first dates. It should go without saying, but your clothes — and shoes especially — should look clean!' 5. How much you talk about yourself. Does the conversation have a nice back-and-forth, or is it very one-sided? If your date can't get a word in edgewise, that's a problem. 'Do they listen or just talk about themselves?' reader Mary C. wrote on Facebook. Reader Cayci C. said she pays attention to whether 'they talk with me and not at me.' And for reader Louise P., it's not just how much the date talks about themself, it's also what they're saying. 'If they say their last partner was 'crazy,' if they start future-faking immediately, if they talk about money immediately ― spot the red flags,' she said. 6. Your manners and how you treat your server. If your first date is at a bar or restaurant, you'd better believe your date is going to notice how politely you interact with the people who work there. It 'screams volumes about someone's character,' Shanna M. wrote on Facebook. Reader Kerri D. said she also pays attention to behaviors like whether her date opens the door for her or asks her where she wants to sit. 'None of these things are required or dealbreakers in any way, it just tells me a lot about their personality and how OK they might be with mine,' she wrote on Facebook. 'I am hella awkward and need a bit of space and time to 'warm up' to someone. ... I have no problem giving people the benefit of the doubt for the same reason. But a lot of very simple behaviors can hint at compatibility.' 7. How you make them feel. Your date might not walk away from the evening remembering the color of your eyes or your exact facial features, Hoffman said. They will, however, remember how you made them feel. 'Was something said that creeped them out? Or made them lean in? Focusing on the atmosphere and feeling of connection is more important than choosing the perfect dress or tie,' she said. And here's what your date probably won't notice. There's no sense fixating on things your date is unlikely to pick up on anyway. According to our experts, that includes the following: Minor physical 'flaws' You might be self-conscious about perceived imperfections like a 'crooked tooth, a few extra pounds or a small scar,' said Notas. But your date probably isn't focusing on any of that — and neither should you. 'Unless it's something really obvious, your date isn't zeroing in on minor details,' he said. 'She's focused on your overall vibe and how you make her feel.' Same goes for pimples or blemishes, Anderson said. Not a big deal! 'Everyone gets the occasional zit. Unless you have one that dominates your face, you're better off not calling attention to it and just enjoying your date,' she said. How fancy your clothes are Your date probably isn't going to be paying close attention to your particular wardrobe choices. You want the overall look to be put-together — but beyond that, the specifics don't matter all that much. 'I hear a lot of emphasis on not only what to wear, but on which brands to choose, yet rarely do I hear a report from a client that they liked a date because of the brands or specific clothing items they wore,' Hoffman said. 'Usually they'll notice if someone is dressed poorly or if the clothes are worn, but other than that, labels don't tend to matter on a first date.' Your outfit choice probably isn't going to tank a date as long as it's appropriate for the setting. 'If your clothes look clean and fitted, she'll walk away with a positive impression about your style,' Notas said. Your exact turns of phrase When it comes to communication, your demeanor, interest in your date and tone of voice will do a lot of the heavy lifting. The exact words you use are less important. 'While you obviously want to avoid profanity or insensitive language, what matters is your ability to listen and the flow of conversation,' Notas said. 'How you say something is so much more important than what you say.' The good news: The vast majority of the things your date will notice about you right off the bat are '100% in your control and free or inexpensive to improve,' Anderson said. Her advice? 'Focus on being your most present, best self when you meet your date, versus worrying about any more minor details, like which of two shirts to wear,' she added. 'I always recommend my clients do something that makes them feel awesome — like go to the gym or watch a comedy special — before going on a date to make the best first impression.' HuffPost.
Yahoo
21-05-2025
- General
- Yahoo
What Are 'Pink Flags' In Relationships?
There's a lot of talk of 'flags' in dating and relationships. Perhaps the most common ― red flags ― refer to signs of toxic behavior or clear incompatibility in a partner. Think: love-bombing, being rude to waitstaff and trying to control and manipulate your every move. Green flags, on the other hand, are signs of a good partner. You might have found a keeper if you communicate well and feel comfortable being yourself around them, for example. But there's another flag color that falls in the middle of the spectrum: pink flags. Below, relationship experts explain how to recognize pink flags and what to do about them. 'Pink flags are subtle indicators that you might not be a fit in a relationship,' said Damona Hoffman, an OkCupid dating coach and host of 'The Dates & Mates Podcast.' She noted that they're not as overt as red flags, which tend to be compatibility and behavioral issues that anyone can recognize as problematic. But even though pink flags are less serious, it's important to address these minor problems, rather than let them fester. 'Pink flags are the kind of warning signs that you can talk yourself out of and overlook until they become red,' Hoffman explained. 'Alternatively, you can also make pink flags into relationship dealbreakers when they were simply subtle differences that could have been worked through.' Alysha Jeney, a therapist and owner of Modern Love Counseling in Denver, similarly emphasized the importance of recognizing pink flags when they arise. 'Pink flags could be something that you intuitively sense is a bit off, but you're trying to give the relationship time to determine its severity,' she said. 'They can also be trigger points from past relationships that you want to be mindful of. Pink flags are important to make note of in relationships and be used as a point of reflection.' Pink flags come in many forms that vary from relationship to relationship, but there are some common examples. 'One that I hear clients discuss is a person who has limited opinions on things ― for example, never has an opinion or doesn't care where you eat, what you go do, etc.,' said Liz Higgins, a relational therapist and founder of Millennial Life Counseling. 'Another is differences in political or religious belief systems.' Being messy or not texting often enough can be everyday pink flags as well. While these issues aren't automatic dealbreakers, they shouldn't be swept under the rug either. 'Some pink flags that should be observed are changes in behavior,' said Mabel Yiu, a marriage and family therapist and CEO of Women's Therapy Institute. 'As an example, if they used to be affectionate, but they have become less so over time.' Pay attention if your physical relationship has changed or you've stopped being intentional about dating and growing as a couple. 'Another pink flag is unmatched love languages, such as acts of service and physical touch,' Yiu said. 'This is not a serious issue if both partners are willing to pull closer and accommodate another's love language.' Sarah Weisberg, a licensed psychologist and founder of Potomac Therapy Group, stressed the importance of taking note of your own thoughts and behaviors, as well as your partner's. 'When we notice ourselves deliberately or inadvertently hurting others, it's important to take a step back and ask ourselves what's going on,' she said. 'What could this be telling us about our conscious or unconscious feelings about the relationship? In these instances we might need to do some work on ourselves, listen to our intuition and have some hard conversations.' Still, what's a red flag to one person might actually be a pink ― or even green ― flag for you. 'One person's too much texting is another person's just right,' Hoffman said. 'You need to figure out what your needs and wants are in a relationship and be able to communicate that to your partner. Use pink flags as a signifier that you need to get more information rather than a signifier that the relationship is doomed.' 'Pink flags are easier to ignore and thus potentially more damaging than red flags,' said Tracy Ross, a licensed clinical social worker specializing in couples and family therapy. 'Sometimes pink flags feel subtle ― you don't catch them the first or even the second time ― as opposed to red flags that are obvious if you let yourself see them. But if something nags at you repeatedly, it's time to pay attention.' She recommended asking yourself, 'Is this workable, is this person willing to work with me, willing to communicate, work through things together? If I express my concerns, do they hear me and take in what I'm saying?' A pink flag could turn out to be the indicator that leads you to discover a red flag. In the process of exploring a pink flag, you might find that your partner isn't willing to figure things out together. 'Every relationship has that dance and has to find that balance,' Ross said. 'Pink flags are those things that make you question whether or not it will be possible, red flags are the areas where you find out it won't be.' She cautioned against confusing pink flags with just having the unrealistic expectation that your partner will meet each and every one of your needs. Instead, focus on feeling complete in yourself while identifying what is important to you in a partner. 'One sure way to understand the difference between pink flags and red flags is to give serious and honest thought to what you want in a relationship ― do an inventory of your 'must haves,' your 'nonnegotiables,' and your 'would be nice ifs,'' Ross explained. 'If you spend time reflecting on that in advance and know what you are looking for ― what you can and cannot compromise on ― then it will be much more clear when you see an actual flag.' 'Regardless of whether it's a pink flag or a red flag, the most important thing is not to ignore it,' Ross said. 'The discomfort or uncertainty surrounding these issues often leads to avoidance, and all kinds of relationship issues grow from avoidance.' Rather than letting things simmer unaddressed, take the time to process the pink flags you observe. Then, talk about them. 'I would say knowing your safe spaces to explore these notions is important: with a therapist, a trusted friend, a safe relationship, especially if you're in the beginning stages of dating,' Higgins said. 'Sometimes it's more appropriate to wait a bit before putting every last thing out on the table. In a newer relationship, the bond isn't as structured or secure, so bringing up a lot of super important things right away may not work as effectively. Balance is key.' Consider why you might be feeling concerned or uncomfortable, and if it's possibly part of a bigger issue you that need to work through on your own or together. Sit with it and think about whether you're making assumptions or projecting. 'Pink flags might also give you an opportunity to communicate with your partner(s), and how you do so can in itself determine if the relationship is one you want to continue with,' said Rachel Needle, a licensed psychologist and the co-director of Modern Sex Therapy Institutes. 'Regardless of whether an issue is big or small, it is important in any relationship that you are able to communicate about it in a healthy way, and feel comfortable expressing your feelings and concerns.' She also advised acknowledging the positive aspects of the relationship. Focus on communicating honestly to see if the pink flag issue is nonnegotiable, or if it's something that you can accept or reach middle a ground on instead. 'It's important to pay attention to pink flags but not to be obsessed with them or let them overtake your relationship,' added Hoffman. 'They are simply things to keep an eye on or concerns you should get curious about.' 6 Little Green Flags That You've Found A Keeper What Exactly Is A 'Situationship'? As An Asian American Woman, This Is The Dating App Red Flag I Don't Talk About
