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Yahoo
5 days ago
- General
- Yahoo
If You've Never Had A Close Friend, You'll Relate To These Emotions
There's a quiet ache of never having that 'person'—the one who knows your inside jokes, your coffee order, the name of your childhood pet. If you've never had a close friend, you know how it feels to float through life like an outsider, wondering if you're missing some secret ingredient everyone else just… has. These aren't just minor annoyances—they're deep, unsettling reminders of how isolating life can feel when you've never had a real, ride-or-die friend. If any of these 13 struggles resonate, you're not alone—there are more of us out here than you think. You've been there—invited to the group hangout, but always slightly on the edge. As explained by New View Advice in their episode "Why am I Triggered by Being a Third Wheel?", feeling like a third wheel can trigger deep feelings of sadness, jealousy, and not being enough, especially when you struggle with the insecurity of not belonging or fitting in Over time, that outsider feeling becomes a quiet, heavy ache. It's not loud enough to explain to anyone, but it leaves you wondering if you'll ever have that effortless, seen-and-loved kind of connection that others seem to have by default. When something goes wrong—your car breaks down, you get bad news, or you just need to vent—you freeze. There's no go-to person, no 'drop everything and be there' friend in your life. So you sit with the chaos alone, scrolling through your contacts, realizing you can't think of a single name to call without it feeling weird. It's a sharp, isolating moment that makes you question whether you're doing life wrong. You don't just feel lonely—you feel untethered, like everyone else has a safety net and you're free-falling alone. People talk about 'the group chat' like it's this sacred space of memes, support, and endless banter—but you wouldn't know. According to a study published in Frontiers in Psychology, social exclusion—including being ignored or left out of group interactions like group texts—can significantly impact individuals' sense of belonging and meaning in life, making those excluded feel like outsiders who struggle to explain their experience to others That absence can feel like a silent exclusion, a reminder that you're on the outside looking in. And the worst part? You can't even explain that to anyone, because who would you even tell? When you do try to build a connection, you overthink every text, every comment, every like. Did you come on too strong? Did you say something weird? Should you have waited longer to reply? The self-doubt spirals until you end up pulling back, just in case. The fear of being 'too much' is rooted in the belief that people will leave if they see the real you. So you shrink, stay small, and tell yourself it's safer this way—even though it's also unbearably lonely. At parties or gatherings, you try to join conversations, but it feels like no one notices you. People smile politely, but no one lights up when you walk into the room. You feel like background noise—pleasant enough, but never the person they can't wait to talk to. It's a subtle, aching kind of invisibility. Research from neuroscientists at Sweden's Karolinska Institutet found that the perception of having an invisible body can reduce social anxiety and the stress of being the center of attention, suggesting that feeling invisible affects how we process social cues and anxiety. Small talk feels like an endless loop you can't escape. You want to get deeper—to talk about real fears, dreams, and the messy, complicated stuff—but those conversations never seem to happen for you. It feels like everyone else has their person to confide in, and you're stuck in surface-level connections. That longing for depth leaves you feeling like there's a whole part of you that no one ever gets to see. It's like you're living in grayscale while everyone else is in full color. You tell yourself maybe you're too quiet, too weird, too intense. Maybe you missed some social milestone or didn't learn the friendship playbook. You start to believe that if you were friend material, you'd have a bestie by now—and that belief eats away at your confidence. As noted by Walden University, research shows that factors like introversion, shyness, fear of rejection, and lack of trust can hold people back from making new friends. The difficulty isn't about being broken but about overcoming internal obstacles and understanding that friendships take time and effort to develop, sometimes requiring 120 to 160 hours of shared time to move from casual acquaintances to close friends. Scrolling through photos of people laughing together, traveling together, showing up for each other—it stings. You tell yourself not to be bitter, but there's a part of you that aches for what you've never had. And then the guilt creeps in: Why can't you just be happy for them? It's a double-edged pain—longing for connection while also feeling ashamed for wanting it so badly. And that shame? It keeps you stuck in a loop of isolation. When someone does show interest in you, it's hard to trust it. You wonder if they like you, or if they're just being polite. You question their intentions, waiting for the other shoe to drop—because deep down, you don't believe you're someone people stick around for. That mistrust makes it hard to relax into potential friendships. You self-sabotage without even realizing it, keeping people at arm's length even as you crave closeness. Without a close friend, you learn to handle everything on your own—your emotions, your logistics, your struggles. You pride yourself on being 'low-maintenance,' but the truth is, you don't have a choice. There's no one to lean on, so you carry it all yourself. This independence can look like strength, but underneath, it's a quiet exhaustion. You're not choosing self-sufficiency—it's a survival mechanism. When you've never had a close friend, opening up feels like exposing yourself to rejection. Vulnerability isn't just scary—it feels dangerous. So you keep conversations light, deflect with humor, or act like you're fine, even when you're not. But that armor comes at a cost. It keeps you safe, but it also keeps you lonely, trapped in the very isolation you wish you could escape. You're so used to figuring it out on your own that asking for help feels like admitting failure. You don't want to be a burden, so you tell yourself it's easier to just handle it—even when you're drowning. This reluctance isn't just about pride—it's about not having anyone who feels like a safe, reliable landing place. And that absence is a quiet heartbreak all its own. There are moments—late at night, scrolling through social media, or sitting quietly at a café—when the loneliness hits you hard. You wonder if this is just who you are, if some people just… don't get to have that kind of closeness. It's a thought that makes your chest ache in a way you can't explain. But here's the truth: it's not too late. The story isn't over. You're not destined to be alone forever, and the first step is giving yourself grace for how much this hurts.


Time of India
27-05-2025
- Health
- Time of India
What happens when you consume coconut water with sabja (basil) seeds in summer
Combining coconut water and sabja seeds offers a refreshing way to stay hydrated, especially during summer. Coconut water's electrolytes and anti-inflammatory properties complement sabja seeds' digestive benefits and fiber content, promoting overall well-being. This blend aids digestion, supports weight management, and nourishes the skin, making it a simple yet effective health boost. The increase in mercury levels is a clear warning that we must pay closer attention to staying properly hydrated. One of the simplest and most refreshing ways to do this is by enjoying the calming blend of coconut water and sabja (basil) seeds. A study published by the National Library of Medicine states that coconut water is rich in electrolytes like potassium, sodium, magnesium, and calcium, making it an effective natural hydrator. Research also indicates that coconut water exhibits anti-inflammatory properties. A study published in BMC Complementary Medicine and Therapies suggests that coconut water of different maturity stages ameliorates inflammatory responses, with young coconut water showing a potent anti-inflammatory effect. A study published in Journal of Ethnopharmacology suggests that basil seeds may help alleviate constipation and promote regular bowel movements. The high fiber content in sabja seeds may contribute to heart health by improving lipid profiles and reducing cholesterol levels. A study published in Frontiers in Nutrition found that basil seed supplementation improved lipid profiles in individuals with hyperlipidemia. by Taboola by Taboola Sponsored Links Sponsored Links Promoted Links Promoted Links You May Like Buy Brass Idols - Handmade Brass Statues for Home & Gifting Luxeartisanship Buy Now Undo Scroll down to read what happens when you combine these two magical ingredients together and consume them daily during summer months. Natural cooler Coconut water is hydrating and rich in electrolytes, while sabja seeds have a natural cooling effect on the body. Together, they help regulate body temperature and combat heat-related fatigue or heatstroke. When soaked in coconut water sabja seeds help lower the body heat, and keep you hydrated from within. Their ability to retain water makes them an excellent natural remedy to beat the scorching summer. Boost digestion Coconut water is packed with natural enzymes like catalase, peroxidase, and dehydrogenase, which help break down and ease the digestion process. Its high water content keeps the digestive tract hydrated, preventing issues like constipation and bloating. On the other hand, sabja seeds form a gel-like coating when soaked in coconut water and are rich in soluble fiber, which promotes smooth digestion. This fiber helps regulate bowel movements, relieve constipation, and cleanse the gut by flushing out toxins. They also have a natural cooling effect on the stomach, making them ideal for soothing acidity and heartburn. Their anti-inflammatory properties further support gut health by reducing bloating and discomfort. Hydration with nutrients Coconut water is a powerhouse of hydration, enriched with essential nutrients. It is packed with electrolytes like potassium, sodium, magnesium, and calcium, which help maintain fluid balance, muscle function, and energy levels. Even sabja seeds help retain moisture in the body, keeping you cool and hydrated for longer. They also offer nutrients like iron, calcium, magnesium and fiber. Aid weight management Coconut water is low in calories and free from added sugars. It is also rich in potassium, which helps balance sodium levels and reduce water retention, preventing bloating, and keeps weight under control. Sabja seeds are rich in dietary fiber, which not only aids digestion but also slows down the conversion of carbohydrates into glucose, preventing sudden spikes in blood sugar—key for managing hunger and energy levels. They are low in calories and are packed with nutrients like omega-3 fatty acids, calcium, magnesium, and iron which help support healthy weight management. Good for skin Coconut water is a natural skin elixir. It is rich in vitamins C, B1, B3, and B6, along with essential minerals like potassium and magnesium, and works from the inside out to nourish your skin. The hydrating properties of coconut water help keep the skin plump, soft and radiant, while its antioxidant content fights free radicals, reducing signs of ageing like fine lines and dullness. And sabja seeds also promote clear, glowing skin. Rich antioxidants, omega-3 fatty acids, and vitamins, they help combat free radicals, reducing inflammation and signs of aging. Thumb and Embed Images Courtesy: istock Can't eat your food without snapping a picture first? Join our Food Photography Contest and stand a chance to win exciting prizes! Click HERE for details. Join our WhatsApp Food Community to discover delicious recipes, enjoy fascinating food stories, and stay updated with the latest food news! Click here One step to a healthier you—join Times Health+ Yoga and feel the change
Yahoo
22-05-2025
- Health
- Yahoo
13 Ways To Make Peace With The Idea Of Death If You Obsess Over It
Thinking about death doesn't make you morbid—it makes you aware. But when that awareness tips into obsession, anxiety, or dread, it can start to pull you away from life itself. The irony is that in fearing death too much, we forget how to live. This list isn't about toxic positivity or forcing yourself to 'let go.' It's about reframing, reconnecting, and finding small ways to hold space for the unknown. Because peace with death doesn't come from avoidance—it comes from curiosity, courage, and quiet acceptance. You're not weird or broken for thinking about death often. Most people do—they just don't say it out loud. Fear of mortality is baked into being conscious. The key is recognizing that your obsession is an attempt at control, not a sign of instability. Research published in Frontiers in Psychology on Lester Fear of Death highlights the Revised Collett-Lester Fear of Death Scale (CL-FODS) as a commonly used assessment tool for measuring fears of death across different cultural backgrounds. Once you accept the fear as part of the human condition, it softens. You don't have to fight it—you just have to stop letting it take over. Is it pain? The unknown? Disappearing? Leaving loved ones behind? The concept of death is vast—your fear is probably more specific. When you clarify the real fear, you can begin to untangle it. Specific fear is manageable. Vague dread isn't. According to an essay by Oliver Sacks published in The Marginalian, he confronted death with courageous curiosity and radiant lucidity, showing that death can be approached with grace and understanding rather than fear or denial. This perspective aligns with the idea that reading the works of authors like Sacks can help make the conversation about death more accessible and less intimidating. Reading other perspectives can disarm your fear by making the conversation more accessible. Death becomes less of a looming monster and more of a shared transition. And that shift matters. Sit quietly and ask yourself, What if this moment is enough? Not forever. Just now. Breathe into the idea that your existence is happening right here, right now. As explained in a recent study published by the International Journal for Multidisciplinary Research, mindfulness practices help reduce death anxiety by encouraging present-moment awareness and a non-judgmental attitude toward thoughts and feelings. Mindfulness doesn't erase fear—it helps re-center you in life. The more present you are, the less power hypothetical endings have. Peace lives in the now, not the what-if. Say the scary thing out loud. The more death stays hidden, the more monstrous it becomes. Sharing your thoughts with someone compassionate can instantly reduce the intensity. Death loses some of its edge when it's held in community. When it's not taboo, it's less terrifying. You don't have to carry existential dread alone. In a comprehensive review published in the journal Mortality, researchers discuss various traditional and innovative interventions for addressing fear of death, highlighting that talking openly about death and dying with trusted individuals is a key therapeutic approach that can reduce death anxiety and related distress. Write, paint, record, plant, build. Legacy doesn't have to be epic—it just has to feel real. Creating something is an act of defiance against impermanence. It says, I was here. It reminds you that death isn't erasure—it's transition. And that your impact can ripple quietly after you're gone. Watch the leaves fall. Observe decay, rebirth, and impermanence without panic. Nature is the most honest teacher about the life-death cycle. When you're in nature, death doesn't feel like failure. According to research published in Scientific Reports, a stronger connection to nature is linked to lower levels of stress and anxiety. It feels like rhythm. And rhythm is far less scary than chaos. You can't control when or how you die—but you can control how you live today. What do you say? What do you notice? What do you protect? Leaning into these micro-choices gives you a sense of agency. And agency is what obsessive fear often lacks. It reminds you that you do have power—even when the end is out of your hands. Dark humor isn't disrespect—it's a form of emotional ventilation. Laughing at the absurdity of mortality doesn't mean you're in denial. It means you're human. Jokes about death, when used wisely, create distance between fear and identity. You stop being the person who's afraid of dying, and become someone who can hold both fear and levity. That's healing. Buddhism, Stoicism, existentialism, even physics—there are hundreds of frameworks that address death with depth and compassion. You don't have to adopt a belief system. But exploring one might offer language and metaphors that soften the fear. Perspective helps shrink the panic. It adds texture to something that often feels blank and bottomless. You're allowed to search for meaning, even if it keeps evolving. Obsession usually points to something you haven't fully processed: unresolved grief, unmet desires, or fear of not fully living. Death anxiety is often life anxiety in disguise. Ask yourself: What do I still want to experience, say, feel, or change? The fear might be a mirror, not a sentence. And reflection can turn dread into direction. Make a list of things that bring you joy, ground you, and matter to you. Not because you're planning to die, but because you're remembering you're still here. A fear of death often means you haven't fully acknowledged what you're alive for. This isn't morbid—it's clarifying. It roots you in value. And that's the antidote to existential spiraling. You don't need to be fearless. You just need to be willing to live anyway. Peace isn't total elimination of fear—it's knowing that fear doesn't have to run the show. You're not broken for feeling anxious about death. You're awake. And that awareness, if held gently, can become the reason you live with more meaning, not less.


RTÉ News
20-05-2025
- Sport
- RTÉ News
Inside the phenomenal football brain of Kevin De Bruyne
Analysis: Football intelligence means the Belgian and Man City star's ability to read the game is on par with the greatest midfielders of all time It's a cool August afternoon in 2022 on Tyneside, and Manchester City are losing 3-2 to Newcastle United. Suddenly, Kevin De Bruyne receives the ball in the Newcastle final third and, in the blink of an eye, splits the defence with an extraordinary pass to Bernardo Silva, who scores to make it 3-3 and rescue a point for City from a thrilling game. From Premier League, Kevin De Bruyne's assist for Man City vs Newcastle United in August 2022 This is one of many magical moments from De Bruyne's illustrious Premier League career. As Manchester City prepare to bid farewell to the Belgian midfielder, his legacy as a Premier League great is cemented. De Bruyne possesses all the qualities of an elite midfielder: astute tactical awareness, physicality and supreme technical ability. But as recently highlighted by Arsenal legend Thierry Henry, one attribute stands out above the rest: his brain. The Belgian's ability to read the game is on par with the greatest midfielders of all time, like Xavi, Andrea Pirlo and Paul Scholes. While this ability isn't as easy to define as physical attributes such as speed and strength, there is one term that pundits, players, coaches and scientists seem to converge on when discussing this topic: football intelligence. So, what is football intelligence? In simple terms, it's the ability to anticipate the actions of opponents and make the right decision under severe time pressure. Three decades of research in the field of sports psychology has attempted to break down football intelligence into specific, measurable skills. A recent paper published in Frontiers in Psychology has integrated this research in the form of a general, 3-stage model of how football intelligence might operate on the pitch. From Golazo!, a Thierry Henry masterclass in football intelligence Stage 1 in this model is an assessment of the current play situation: players scan their environment, recognise patterns of play and anticipate what is about to happen on the pitch. Research has shown that more experienced players scan more frequently than less experienced players, and a higher scanning frequency is linked to a higher likelihood of completing a pass. Elite players are also better at paying attention to informative cues - such as a defender's body position - which can signal whether they are about to apply pressure or drop off. In Stage 2, the situational assessment from Stage 1 guides decision-making via "executive functions" - mental skills that help the brain evaluate options and choose the most appropriate action. Elite footballers tend to have enhanced executive functions, allowing them to use the information they receive more effectively. In Stage 3, the outcome of the action is assessed and feedback is used to inform future decisions. Returning to the goal described at the start of this article, this model can clearly explain the processes at play in De Bruyne's mind. He scans the opposition box before receiving the ball, recognises a gap in the defence, anticipates Silva's run and executes a sublime pass for a goal. This outcome reinforces the likelihood that De Bruyne will repeat this action if a similar scenario arises again. How is football intelligence developed? The current view within the field is clear: practice makes perfect. It develops through years of intense, specialised training and coaching. During this time, footballers develop a large memory bank of game-specific situations which they can access in future situations to facilitate more efficient decision-making. Research from Premier League academies supports this idea. Elite academy players aged 9-17 were tested on several measures of football intelligence, and the results showed that performance increased significantly with age. These results were compared with those of age-matched local and regional players, and unsurprisingly, the elite players performed much better. This is likely due to the accumulation of over 7,500 hours of practice by age 16, which is almost double the number reported for sub-elite players. From Calcio Show, when the assist is better than the goal Wayne Rooney, Manchester United's all-time leading goalscorer, recently echoed the importance of practice for goal-scoring: "You practice so it becomes second nature…when you're in the box, your brain recognises the situation automatically". But talents like Wayne Rooney or Lamine Yamal are important examples of players who show football intelligence beyond their years, highlighting that experience may not be the only factor. Notably, elite academy players display much better football intelligence than sub-elite players as early as age 9, suggesting that some players may be born with a brain for football. One trait which may provide elite players with a pre-existing advantage to excel is vision. A study from Liverpool John Moores University found that footballers have significantly better visual acuity (the ability to see fine detail at distance) and contrast sensitivity (the ability to see the outline of an object against a background) than non-footballers. Once viewed as "immeasurable", football intelligence can now be broken down into specific skills and quantified Interestingly, a recent study from Dublin City University demonstrated that differences in sensory function may exist between different positions. This study showed that professional goalkeepers possess an enhanced ability to combine visual and auditory sensory information compared to both outfield players and non-footballers. However, it remains unclear whether these differences represent natural abilities or trainable skills - a question that future longitudinal research must address. Sports science has revolutionised football in the 21st century. Clubs now collect data across numerous attributes to make more informed decisions on player development and workload management. Thanks to three decades of research, football intelligence, once viewed as "immeasurable", can now be broken down into specific skills and quantified. Clubs that leverage this research to identify and develop football intelligence within individual players may gain a significant advantage in the data arms race within professional football. For Manchester City, this may be the key to finding the next De Bruyne.

ABC News
20-05-2025
- Science
- ABC News
Humpback whales have babies much further south than previously thought
Humpback whales are on the move again. At this time of year, the whales travel up the eastern and western sides of Australia, treating viewers on the coast to a show. They're migrating from cold, krill-rich southern waters to spend their winters in the warmer seas north of the continent, which are the whales' breeding grounds. You may even see mums with newborn humpbacks on the northern route well before they reach the tropics, according to a new study. The study challenges assumptions about where humpback whales breed, and possibly why they migrate, according to lead author Jane McPhee-Frew. And observations by citizen scientists played a key role in the findings. Until now, many researchers believed whales only gave birth to calves in warmer tropical waters. But the study, published in Frontiers in Marine Science, found records of baby humpbacks in the east as far south as Tasmania and New Zealand. Humpback whales occur in every ocean around the world, with both northern hemisphere and southern hemisphere populations moving between their respective poles and the tropics. They were nearly hunted to extinction by the mid-20th century, but their numbers have since rebounded, with tens of thousands now migrating up the Australian coasts. Each year begin their northward migration from April, and return south between August and November. Around Australia, humpbacks generally weren't thought to give birth further south than 28 degrees latitude in the east (near the Gold Coast), or 23 degrees in the west (just south of Exmouth). "Our general concept of humpback whale ecology is that they feed at high latitudes in the poles, breed in the tropics, and they have this migration that's driven between the two needs," Ms McPhee-Frew said. Ms McPhee-Frew, a PhD candidate at the University of New South Wales, had been surprised to see a very young whale while working as a tour guide in Newcastle in 2023. "I saw a newborn right at the mouth of Newcastle Harbour," she said. Her PhD supervisor was also surprised, but Ms McPhee-Frew's colleagues in tourism weren't. They had apparently seen baby humpbacks in colder southern waters. This prompted Ms McPhee-Frew and fellow ecologists to search for more records of newborn whales south of the tropics. "We clearly have a gap here," she said. The researchers compiled records of baby humpback whales from a range of sources: government agencies, migration surveys and citizen science records from places like tourism boat trips. They found records of more than 200 newly-born whale calves appearing further south than the previously assumed limit. Some of the neonates were recorded at 43 degrees south, in the waters around Tasmania and New Zealand. This was as far south as the observations went, so it's possible that humpbacks were giving birth even closer to Antarctica. This means the whales don't need to breed in warmer waters — although they might prefer to. The baby whales were born while their mothers were heading north, towards the tropics. Olaf Meynecke, a whale researcher at Griffith University who wasn't involved in the study, said the results were "not surprising". Dr Meynecke and his colleagues had seen newly-born humpbacks well south of their traditional breeding grounds in the past decade, all heading north. "We know that they undertake all important behaviour — feeding, mating and birthing — not only in dedicated areas, but also along their migratory corridor," Dr Meynecke said. If the humpback whales don't need to breed in the tropics, why are they migrating thousands of kilometres to do it? "I don't know, but it's exciting," Ms McPhee-Frew said. It may be that whales born in the tropics are still better off. Ms McPhee-Frew pointed out a number of "really obvious" benefits to warmer waters: they're better for baby whales with poor temperature regulation, they're calmer, and they have fewer predators such as orcas. Dr Meynecke says that while humpbacks can give birth in cooler waters, they still migrate north to "ensure faster growth rates" for their calves. "With an expansion of the population and higher stress on food availability during summer feeding, it may be an advantage to give birth further south," Dr Meynecke said. But there could also be other factors driving the migration. "Is it that the female is just driven north through some deep either cultural or genetic instinct?" Ms McPhee-Frew said. Either way, studying baby whales born in cold waters will help researchers find out. If these calves grow up worse off than their warm-water peers, that will show that there really is a good reason to migrate for breeding, she said. "What we have now is this really important comparison group." Dr Meynecke wants to see systematic studies on the mothers and calves who are born mid-migration, to learn more about their true numbers and behaviours. He said it would be interesting to know the effect of being born during migration on an individual calf. "Will it return to the same waters where it was born for reproduction?" he asked. Ms McPhee-Frew, meanwhile, recommended that people keen to see whales book in tours with local responsible operating groups — both for the fun of seeing them, and because their observations may help further research. There are a number of citizen science projects in many states. If you're planning to do some whale watching this winter, you can help researchers wherever you are along the coast by logging your observations. If you're interested in drone photography, note there is a blanket rule of keeping drones at least 100m away from marine animals including whales. Each state may have additional rules. Ms McPhee Frew said photographers should include the distance (and zoom or photography settings) in the caption when posting pictures. "We encourage people to enjoy these lovely animals, provided they're following the rules that are in place for the whales' protection," she said.