16-05-2025
'I didn't know the word lesbian': How LGBTIQA+ lives have changed across decades
When Laura Martinez, 27, introduced her girlfriend to her family, they welcomed her with open arms, a stark contrast to what coming out was like in years past.
Cheryl Szollosi, 62, who stayed closeted for 10 years to keep her job in the Air Force, said she found it amazing that young people today could just be themselves.
"They are so lucky - I wish I could have done that at my age," Ms Szollosi said.
"It's just a sign of the times."
ACM masthead, The Courier spoke with three people from different generations about their experiences growing up LGBTQA+.
Helen Watson, 77, grew up in a small country town near Shepparton, VIC.
"I didn't know anyone who was LGBTQ+. It's not to say they weren't there, but I didn't know them," Ms Watson said.
"I think a lot of people lived quietly and out of sight."
Ms Watson realised she was different in her early 20s, around the 1970s.
"I didn't know the words, lesbian, gay, trans. None of those were part of my vocabulary. None of them were part of what I understood," she said.
But Ms Watson's father told her a story about a family in Melbourne who were extremely well-known.
"The tragedy that befell them happened when the daughter had left her husband and gone off with another woman. It was very clear. That was bad," she said.
The 77-year-old said she spent years finding a community for her to belong to.
"It was not easy. I was in my late 40s to find one," she said.
Ms Szollosi knew "there was something wrong" when she was in primary school.
"I just knew I was different, but don't know what it was," the 62-year-old said.
"Then I joined the Air Force. This was in the 1980s when it was illegal to be gay. So I had to be closeted for 10 years.
"I was just mortified that I could lose my job just for being who I was."
Ms Szollosi finally came out and told her mum when she was 33 years old.
"My mum never spoke to me after I came out to her," she said.
Ms Martinez started talking to her friends about being queer when she was 15 years old.
"For me, I think it just means how I choose to live and who I choose to be with, and it's just different from the norm," the 27-year-old said.
"I had a very close community of friends who we flocked together - some of my friends were queer or some were straight, but very comfortable with everyone.
"It's a very diverse community as well. I just think it's free to be whatever you want to be."
Last year, Ms Martinez first introduced her girlfriend to her family.
"[They] were all fine with it. Some of them said that it was not new information to them," she said.
Ms Martinez said each year she would do something with the community to celebrate the International Day against Homophobia, Biphobia, Intersexism, and Transphobia (IDAHOBIT) on May 17.
It was the day that homosexuality was removed from the World Health Organisation's list of psychiatric diseases in 1990.
Having witnessed society's changing attitudes toward the LGBTIQA+ community, Ms Szollosi said things were getting better and better.
"Now, we have got equality rights, marriage rights. But we are still a minority," Ms Szollosi said.
"As a community, we all bond together. We look after each other."
When Laura Martinez, 27, introduced her girlfriend to her family, they welcomed her with open arms, a stark contrast to what coming out was like in years past.
Cheryl Szollosi, 62, who stayed closeted for 10 years to keep her job in the Air Force, said she found it amazing that young people today could just be themselves.
"They are so lucky - I wish I could have done that at my age," Ms Szollosi said.
"It's just a sign of the times."
ACM masthead, The Courier spoke with three people from different generations about their experiences growing up LGBTQA+.
Helen Watson, 77, grew up in a small country town near Shepparton, VIC.
"I didn't know anyone who was LGBTQ+. It's not to say they weren't there, but I didn't know them," Ms Watson said.
"I think a lot of people lived quietly and out of sight."
Ms Watson realised she was different in her early 20s, around the 1970s.
"I didn't know the words, lesbian, gay, trans. None of those were part of my vocabulary. None of them were part of what I understood," she said.
But Ms Watson's father told her a story about a family in Melbourne who were extremely well-known.
"The tragedy that befell them happened when the daughter had left her husband and gone off with another woman. It was very clear. That was bad," she said.
The 77-year-old said she spent years finding a community for her to belong to.
"It was not easy. I was in my late 40s to find one," she said.
Ms Szollosi knew "there was something wrong" when she was in primary school.
"I just knew I was different, but don't know what it was," the 62-year-old said.
"Then I joined the Air Force. This was in the 1980s when it was illegal to be gay. So I had to be closeted for 10 years.
"I was just mortified that I could lose my job just for being who I was."
Ms Szollosi finally came out and told her mum when she was 33 years old.
"My mum never spoke to me after I came out to her," she said.
Ms Martinez started talking to her friends about being queer when she was 15 years old.
"For me, I think it just means how I choose to live and who I choose to be with, and it's just different from the norm," the 27-year-old said.
"I had a very close community of friends who we flocked together - some of my friends were queer or some were straight, but very comfortable with everyone.
"It's a very diverse community as well. I just think it's free to be whatever you want to be."
Last year, Ms Martinez first introduced her girlfriend to her family.
"[They] were all fine with it. Some of them said that it was not new information to them," she said.
Ms Martinez said each year she would do something with the community to celebrate the International Day against Homophobia, Biphobia, Intersexism, and Transphobia (IDAHOBIT) on May 17.
It was the day that homosexuality was removed from the World Health Organisation's list of psychiatric diseases in 1990.
Having witnessed society's changing attitudes toward the LGBTIQA+ community, Ms Szollosi said things were getting better and better.
"Now, we have got equality rights, marriage rights. But we are still a minority," Ms Szollosi said.
"As a community, we all bond together. We look after each other."
When Laura Martinez, 27, introduced her girlfriend to her family, they welcomed her with open arms, a stark contrast to what coming out was like in years past.
Cheryl Szollosi, 62, who stayed closeted for 10 years to keep her job in the Air Force, said she found it amazing that young people today could just be themselves.
"They are so lucky - I wish I could have done that at my age," Ms Szollosi said.
"It's just a sign of the times."
ACM masthead, The Courier spoke with three people from different generations about their experiences growing up LGBTQA+.
Helen Watson, 77, grew up in a small country town near Shepparton, VIC.
"I didn't know anyone who was LGBTQ+. It's not to say they weren't there, but I didn't know them," Ms Watson said.
"I think a lot of people lived quietly and out of sight."
Ms Watson realised she was different in her early 20s, around the 1970s.
"I didn't know the words, lesbian, gay, trans. None of those were part of my vocabulary. None of them were part of what I understood," she said.
But Ms Watson's father told her a story about a family in Melbourne who were extremely well-known.
"The tragedy that befell them happened when the daughter had left her husband and gone off with another woman. It was very clear. That was bad," she said.
The 77-year-old said she spent years finding a community for her to belong to.
"It was not easy. I was in my late 40s to find one," she said.
Ms Szollosi knew "there was something wrong" when she was in primary school.
"I just knew I was different, but don't know what it was," the 62-year-old said.
"Then I joined the Air Force. This was in the 1980s when it was illegal to be gay. So I had to be closeted for 10 years.
"I was just mortified that I could lose my job just for being who I was."
Ms Szollosi finally came out and told her mum when she was 33 years old.
"My mum never spoke to me after I came out to her," she said.
Ms Martinez started talking to her friends about being queer when she was 15 years old.
"For me, I think it just means how I choose to live and who I choose to be with, and it's just different from the norm," the 27-year-old said.
"I had a very close community of friends who we flocked together - some of my friends were queer or some were straight, but very comfortable with everyone.
"It's a very diverse community as well. I just think it's free to be whatever you want to be."
Last year, Ms Martinez first introduced her girlfriend to her family.
"[They] were all fine with it. Some of them said that it was not new information to them," she said.
Ms Martinez said each year she would do something with the community to celebrate the International Day against Homophobia, Biphobia, Intersexism, and Transphobia (IDAHOBIT) on May 17.
It was the day that homosexuality was removed from the World Health Organisation's list of psychiatric diseases in 1990.
Having witnessed society's changing attitudes toward the LGBTIQA+ community, Ms Szollosi said things were getting better and better.
"Now, we have got equality rights, marriage rights. But we are still a minority," Ms Szollosi said.
"As a community, we all bond together. We look after each other."
When Laura Martinez, 27, introduced her girlfriend to her family, they welcomed her with open arms, a stark contrast to what coming out was like in years past.
Cheryl Szollosi, 62, who stayed closeted for 10 years to keep her job in the Air Force, said she found it amazing that young people today could just be themselves.
"They are so lucky - I wish I could have done that at my age," Ms Szollosi said.
"It's just a sign of the times."
ACM masthead, The Courier spoke with three people from different generations about their experiences growing up LGBTQA+.
Helen Watson, 77, grew up in a small country town near Shepparton, VIC.
"I didn't know anyone who was LGBTQ+. It's not to say they weren't there, but I didn't know them," Ms Watson said.
"I think a lot of people lived quietly and out of sight."
Ms Watson realised she was different in her early 20s, around the 1970s.
"I didn't know the words, lesbian, gay, trans. None of those were part of my vocabulary. None of them were part of what I understood," she said.
But Ms Watson's father told her a story about a family in Melbourne who were extremely well-known.
"The tragedy that befell them happened when the daughter had left her husband and gone off with another woman. It was very clear. That was bad," she said.
The 77-year-old said she spent years finding a community for her to belong to.
"It was not easy. I was in my late 40s to find one," she said.
Ms Szollosi knew "there was something wrong" when she was in primary school.
"I just knew I was different, but don't know what it was," the 62-year-old said.
"Then I joined the Air Force. This was in the 1980s when it was illegal to be gay. So I had to be closeted for 10 years.
"I was just mortified that I could lose my job just for being who I was."
Ms Szollosi finally came out and told her mum when she was 33 years old.
"My mum never spoke to me after I came out to her," she said.
Ms Martinez started talking to her friends about being queer when she was 15 years old.
"For me, I think it just means how I choose to live and who I choose to be with, and it's just different from the norm," the 27-year-old said.
"I had a very close community of friends who we flocked together - some of my friends were queer or some were straight, but very comfortable with everyone.
"It's a very diverse community as well. I just think it's free to be whatever you want to be."
Last year, Ms Martinez first introduced her girlfriend to her family.
"[They] were all fine with it. Some of them said that it was not new information to them," she said.
Ms Martinez said each year she would do something with the community to celebrate the International Day against Homophobia, Biphobia, Intersexism, and Transphobia (IDAHOBIT) on May 17.
It was the day that homosexuality was removed from the World Health Organisation's list of psychiatric diseases in 1990.
Having witnessed society's changing attitudes toward the LGBTIQA+ community, Ms Szollosi said things were getting better and better.
"Now, we have got equality rights, marriage rights. But we are still a minority," Ms Szollosi said.
"As a community, we all bond together. We look after each other."
