4 days ago
- Entertainment
- Winnipeg Free Press
Getting your letter to the editor published
Opinion
Hello, dear correspondent. We are so delighted to hear from you.
Truly, we are.
Within reason.
File
This is our semi-regular missive about the land of letters to the editor, and also about opinion pieces that appear on the Free Press Think Tank page. Feel free to cut this out and put it on your fridge, secured there safely for all eternity with a jaunty fridge magnet.
Equally, feel free to recycle it without qualm or even bothering to read to the end.
First, word length.
The hardest part of writing a letter to the editor or a Think Tank piece is knowing how many words to use. For a letter to the editor, somewhere around 150 words is the true sweet spot. Get in, make your point, and get swiftly out.
Your friends will be amazed — your enemies, both chastened and humbled.
In a crass bastardization of Lewis Carroll's Jabberwocky, the vorpal blade will go snicker-snack, and with its head, you'll go galumphing back.
For the Think Tank page, we can handle two pieces every day around 825 words, and one between 750 and 770, with ease.
Go longer, especially really longer, and things get difficult. Reach 1,100 words of truly stellar prose, and we may eventually find a home for your work — but not until we find a piece that matches both your length and quality, so that we can reduce the page from three pieces to two. It might be a while.
By the way, that includes the line at the end of your piece which we include to explain your experience, expertise, and why readers should respect your authority and accept your opinion.
It might be something like this: 'Russell Wangersky is the comment editor of the Free Press and an insufferable prig.'
Bear that line in mind as well when thinking about your word count.
Some other basic rules apply to both letters and Think Tank pieces, however.
If you give someone the literal equivalent of the side-eye — if you imply they are responsible for some ill, without either outright saying that they are and also providing the necessary proof — you are likely to be cast into the hideous pit of opinion darkness, never to emerge again, at least not right away on our pages.
Reputation is important, both yours and whoever you're choosing to smite.
This is not the Roman forum of the internet, where all weapons are fair game and you can both cast a net over your unwitting prey and then stab your tangled opponent repeatedly with your wordy trident, without facing so much as a raised shield.
Accusing someone of something criminal or otherwise libel them?
Not going to happen, at least, not if we spot it.
Then, there's basic propriety.
'Cuck,' 'moron,' 'idiot' and 'slobbering fool' are not acceptable debate in print or on our website. You get the point.
Threatening things like hanging for politicians — heck, threatening politicians, neighbours or random strangers — will find you so far down the naughty list that you'll be begging for coal in your stocking, just to prove you still exist to the rest of the world.
Some last thoughts.
No one is as funny as they think they are — even us. Humour is actually very hard. That is why true comedians are incredibly smart. You can swing for the humour fences if you choose to, but you may strike out.
Pretend your mother is reading everything you send — and don't write anything that will make her give you that disappointed face.
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You know the one.
And short and to the point will always be better.
Did we mention how delighted we are to hear from you?
We are.
Truth is, slaving down here in the opinion mines, we couldn't do it without you.
