24-05-2025
Parents' List Of 10 'Non-Negotiable' Rules Has The Comments Section On Fire
Lizzie Gaines, a former teacher turned realtor, is best known for chronicling the renovation of her 1990s Colonial home in Texas. Recently, however, she offered her followers a glimpse into another carefully crafted space: her parenting style.
In a now-viral Instagram video, Gaines outlines the set of rules she and her husband, Josh, have established for their three children: Jake, 13, Will, 9, and Birdie, 6.
'Parenting is nuanced, right? And nobody wants to watch a reel where I unpacked all those nuances, so people filled in the gaps with their own assumptions,' Gaines tells
While some critics viewed her approach as overly structured — one commenter called it a 'dictatorship,' and others joked about anticipating a future therapy bill — many praised Gaines for establishing clear boundaries and fostering respect and independence in her children.
The Gaines family rules include:
You say 'Yes, ma'am / No, ma'am / Yes, sir / No, sir' to all adults. Always.
Backpacks and shoes go in the same spot every day after school. It makes mornings smoother.
You're responsible for charging your school devices at the station next to your backpack.
Do your homework — without nudging: It gets done, packed and ready. No reminders from Mom and Dad.
If you get in trouble at school, we stand with your teachers.
Pack your lunch and grab it in the morning, otherwise you can buy it at the school cafeteria.
You will eat what's served at dinner. If you don't like it, no problem, but you'll still join us at the table.
Dinner time is a sacred, no-distraction zone. We'll be kind, get along and share about our day.
Pick up after yourself.
Phones are privileges, not rights: You have one because it's useful; Abuse it, and it's gone. It charges in our room at night, and yes, we check it.
Some of the most controversial expectations revolved around food.
As one person wrote in the comments, 'Forcing your kid to sit hungry and watch everyone eat just because you made food you knew they wouldn't like is extremely messed up.'
'No one in our house is being starved,' Gaines tells TODAY, calmly. She's taking the criticism in stride, firm in her beliefs about how to raise a family.
'Our kids know that they can eat what's offered. If they don't like it, which is very, very rare, they can grab some fruit from the fridge,' Gaines explains. 'We're not short-order cooks. I'm not making you chicken nuggets while the rest of us have a nice, healthy meal.'
For Gaines, a working mother, it's also about instilling gratitude.
'Taking the time to prepare a meal is an act of love, and I make sure they know that,' she says. 'I'm not doing it just for myself — I'm doing it for all of you It's also simply good manners, in any setting, to try the food and be thankful for it. And a nice side effect is that they've all developed pretty refined palates.'
As for Gaines' rule about being 'pleasant' at the dinner table, she clarifies that it doesn't mean ignoring conflict at all costs, especially if someone has hard a rough day and needs to vent. 'What I meant was, we're not going to intentionally poke at each other or try to irritate one another,' she says.
Gaines also addressed her guidelines for devices: all electronics must be charged in her bedroom overnight, and while her son Will, an eighth grader, has a cell phone, she reserves the right to check it at any time.
The former eighth-grade teacher, says she witnessed 'some pretty tragic things happen to kids,' events they'll never fully recover from, because their digital footprint will follow them for the rest of their lives.
When it comes to siding with teachers over her children, Gaines says draws from her own experiences in academia.
'When I reached out to a parent about a behavior issue in class, it made my job so much easier and helped the child in the long run if they parent approached it form a supportive place,' she says. 'If they automatically assumed I was picking on their child or singling them out, it becomes a me-versus-them situation, and that doesn't help anyone.'
Gaines Instagram reel has be seen nearly 19 million times and garnered thousands of reactions:
'Tell me this is satire! This is so concerning.'
'As a teacher, all I can say is THANK YOU!!'
'For a moment I thought I was reading about military ground rules.'
'If you don't agree with these, you're what's wrong with society.'
''Why don't my kids talk to me anymore?''
'School counselor here. THANK YOU MOM AND DAD!! Your children are safe and can operate within your boundaries until they are emotionally developed enough to operate in their own.'
This article was originally published on
