11 hours ago
4 Signs Your LGBTQ+ Feels Supported at Home
Fact checked by Sarah Scott
Pride Month is in full swing, and with it comes the great joy and privilege of supporting LGBTQ+ family and friends. In families with LGBTQ+ children, this time of year is incredibly special and affirming; parents have the opportunity to support their LGBTQ+ children even more loudly and proudly.
As anti-LGBTQ+ legislation and rhetoric continues to make waves, it's more important than ever to support our LGBTQ+ children. Studies have shown that an overwhelming 82% of LGBTQ+ teens want people to support and accept them—and 68% hope for the creation of safe spaces where they can be themselves.
While this doesn't seem like a high bar to clear for supportive parents, some may wonder: Are there any outward signs that their LGBTQ+ children feel supported at home? Parents spoke to mental health experts to find out the four biggest identifiers that your LGBTQ+ child feels supported at home.
This sign is the biggest and most important indicator of whether your LGBTQ+ child feels supported. If your child seems comfortable coming to you with their thoughts and worries about their identity, your support system at home is strong, says Jeremy R. Goshorn, PhD, LCMHC (NC), LPC (PA), NCC, CFT, Assistant Professor at Lebanon Valley College.
'Fostering open, honest, communication within the family is vital. The only way to know if your child feels supported is to ask,' he explains.
This doesn't just work in favor of your family cohesiveness; affirming communities have been found to be protective against suicidal ideation in LGBTQ+ youths.
Let's face it: kids can be hard to engage sometimes, making verbal communication a challenge. But body language can say a lot, says Laura Erickson-Schroth, MD, MA, Chief Medical Officer of The Jed Foundation.'Body language can tell you a lot. Uncrossed arms or legs often indicate a feeling of comfort,' she explains.
Keeping an eye on how your child is holding themselves: if their body language is tense, you might need to sit down and have an open conversation about how they're feeling.
LGBTQ+ folks don't just come out once: they often come out dozens of times as life goes on. Because the world assumes that all people are heteronormative and cisgenger, kids can often be on the back foot when talking about their relationships and identity. But LGBTQ+ children who feel supported can be excited to tell their parents about crucial realizations and developments in their lives.
'When a young person feels at ease being open about their identity with their parents or guardians, they might casually share significant life updates during everyday conversation – things like joining the GSA at school or having a crush on someone in their class,' Dr. Erickson-Scroth says.
Remember, LGBTQ+ children experience stigma in their daily lives, so if you're hearing about everything from the littlest alteration up to the biggest life-changing event, that's a sign they feel supported.
When an LGBTQ+ child feels supported and safe, they can express their unique styles freely. Whether their identities are reflected in their use of pronouns, clothing, makeup, or hair styles, children who feel safe shine authentically, says Dr. Erickson-Schroth. And this also extends to activities that might traditionally feel 'gendered,' like playing with dolls or trucks.
'Make your home a place where your child can be themselves and express their identity authentically, ensuring no games or clothes are off-limits for gendered reasons,' she affirms.
Your child should feel safe to express themselves, and when they do, you can know they are comfortable and supported in your home.
At the end of the day, it's important to make your LGBTQ+ child feel safe and supported. But let's face it: sometimes it can be hard to know what to do and say, especially when the world seems to be moving 1000 MPH at all times. Here are some suggestions from the experts:
Start learning about LGBTQ+ issues: Read about LGBTQ+ topics and make it clear to your child you want to know more and want to advocate for them, says Dr. Erickson-Schroth.
Keep your eyes open: Be aware that outward projection could be a mask, says Dr. Goshorn, but creating an inclusive environment and welcoming atmosphere, like hanging Pride flags and encouraging open communication, helps to mitigate those issues.
Find local support groups: Dr. Goshorn suggests Parents and Friends of Lesbians and Gays (PFLAG), where parents can meet other parents of LGBTQ+ youth.
Use : Swap out 'girlfriend/boyfriend' for 'partner,' suggests Dr. Erickson-Schroth.
Seek outside counseling–for you: Learn effective strategies for supporting your child, including fostering open communication, says Dr. Goshorn.
Give yourself grace: Just showing up for your child matters! Remember, no parent is perfect, and that's okay, affirms Dr. Erickson-Schroth.
Read the original article on Parents
