16-05-2025
Judge orders girl spend night before Communion with her mother
A judge has ordered that a primary school girl spend the night before her first Holy Communion with her mother this weekend.
At the Family Law Court before making his ruling, Judge Alec Gabbett remarked: 'It is the same ding-dong every year with the sacraments.'
The girl's parents are estranged and could not agree on First Holy Communion arrangements on Saturday for their daughter, resulting in the two bringing their dispute before the judge to rule upon.
In ordering that the girl stay with her mother on Friday night to allow her to spend Saturday morning with her mother before the Holy Communion Mass, the judge said: 'At a very basic level, at a very human level, this is mother and daughter stuff.'
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The judge said the proposal put forward by solicitor Anne Walsh for the mother was 'extraordinarily sensible'.
He said: 'It is one of the most reasonable proposals I have received in a long time to deal with a situation that is very acrimonious.'
Ms Walsh said her client's proposal, having discussed the matter with her daughter, is that she would spend the night at her home the night before the communion. The mother had booked hairdressers for her daughter on the morning of the communion and the two would go there together.
Ms Walsh said that the child was happy with the arrangement and that 'mum takes her to the church – they sit with dad and siblings in the same pew in the church. They would take photographs after church and my client would then head away.'
Ms Walsh said the girl would then spend the rest of the day with dad before returning to her client for a day out together on Sunday.
In response, solicitor Mairéad Doyle for the father said he had spoken to his daughter and she had expressed a desire to spend the night before her Holy Communion with her siblings.
Ms Doyle claimed the mother's approach to the arrangements is 'if you don't do it my way' and that the child is under pressure 'and is caught in the middle of this'.
Ms Walsh said she wrote to the other side on April 2nd following her client's conversation with her daughter about the day and did not receive a reply until May 14th.
The judge said he did not have the wishes of the child in front of him and the father said that he could bring his daughter to court to tell the judge her own wishes for the day.
In response, Ms Walsh said: 'If someone thinks that it is right to bring a child to court the day before her first Holy Communion that speaks volumes.'
The judge said: 'I am making the order – mum the night before.'
He added that 'dad is getting the lion's share of the day – he is getting the party and the bouncy castle'.
The judge said older siblings 'don't trump mother and daughter time on Holy Communion day'.
He said: 'This should have been addressed a long time before today. I find that children are very robust and you will find that on the day of the communion once the girl has opened her cards she will be delighted with herself and this will pass.'
