2 days ago
Goodbye, dad bod: Weight loss medications are changing fathers' physiques — and their relationships with their kids.
Neal Bland has done Ironman competitions and marathons. He's given countless personal training sessions over the course of his life and has always prided himself on staying in shape, especially given that obesity runs in his family. But by age 52, time and genetics had begun to catch up with Bland (who asked that we not use his real last name for privacy reasons).
His blood pressure and blood sugar were climbing, his body mass index was hovering in the low 30s, and his joints were aching. Then, during a photo shoot with his wife last year, the photographer told Bland he 'looked good for a dad bod.' Bland knew the photographer had 'meant it as a compliment,' he tells Yahoo Life, 'but it really stuck.' He was still maintaining a rigorous diet and exercise regimen at the time, but it wasn't working for him. So, in March of 2024, he started on the GLP-1 medication tirzepatide. He's lost 45 pounds in a phase of his life he's dubbed his 'dad bod reboot.'
Let's be clear: There's nothing wrong with a dad bod. In fact, the expectation for men to have chiseled abs — at any point, but especially in middle and older age — can be harmful. But for the 38% of American dads who are obese, their bodies may be putting them at risk of type 2 diabetes, heart disease and other potentially life-threatening medical conditions. Some of these fathers have started taking GLP-1 weight loss medications, a decision that can bring about not just changes to their 'bods' and health indicators, but also to their lives as parents.
We spoke to some of them about what it's like to be a dad, minus their former bods.
Thirty-seven-year-old father of two Noah Wiggins is taking his nursing board exams and looking forward to beginning his new career in health care. 'But I looked in the mirror and thought, I can't expect patients to be healthy and maintain a healthy weight if I can't,' he tells Yahoo Life. Plus, Wiggins loves coaching his children's sports teams, but he found himself getting winded and sore when he tried to demonstrate athletic skills for the kids. While he could shed pounds for a time with the help of various diets, he couldn't maintain a healthy weight long-term. So Wiggins talked to his own health care provider, who agreed that GLP-1 medication could be a good option for him.
He started taking Zepbound in January 2024. The medication, along with the support of his two children, has helped him lose more than 80 pounds since then. 'As I started to lose weight and get more active, they started making comments and encouraging me to make healthy food choices … without judgment,' says Wiggins. His daughter, who is about to turn 16, has been especially vocal, keeping Wiggins accountable when he picks up an unhealthy snack or tries to flake on going to the gym. 'I've had to fight the urge to say, 'I'm the parent, I'll go when I want to,'' says Wiggins. But ultimately, he's grateful for the tough-loving support from his kids. 'I think it's been a growing moment for them and for me,' he says. Wiggins's children have also noticed that he has more energy and can just be more fully present for them.
Despite his progress, Wiggins still struggles with his body image. Like others that Wiggins has spoken to within the GLP-1 community, he half-expected that once the scale reached a certain number, he would feel satisfied with his body and appearance. 'But I don't know anyone who actually hits that number and feels like that,' he says. 'I look in the mirror and am happy with how I look and especially how I feel, but body dysmorphia is a real thing, and a lot of times you don't know you have it until you've lost weight.' At his lowest weight, Wiggins was tempted to lose another 20 pounds to make his reflection match the idealized version of himself in his mind, but he knew that would have put him below a healthy weight.
That's when Wiggins realized that it wasn't about losing more weight. He needed to make a conscious effort to improve his mental health and confidence to help him feel content in his own skin. It's an important lesson that he wants his children to learn: how to 'be comfortable in your body, but balance that with good health,' Wiggins says. He's pushed himself to talk more openly with his kids about his own journey toward striking that balance. 'The best thing to do was just have more conversations with them about all of that, and they'll actually take the lead on those conversations once you start them.'
Twenty years ago, when Ryan Rasmussen and his wife, AnnaLyn, were young newlyweds, they wanted desperately to start a family. After three years of trying, AnnaLyn got pregnant with quadruplets. But tragedy struck: None of the four babies survived more than about an hour after birth. The Rasmussens managed to pick up the pieces of their shattered hearts and eventually went on to have four children, born individually. But even as someone moves on, grief can linger in the body, wreaking havoc. For Rasmussen, the loss of his newborns quietly ate at him and, in turn, Rasmussen now recognizes he ate to cope with his grief. He reached nearly 300 pounds, he told Yahoo Life for our series On My Weigh.
For those intervening 20 years, Rasmussen tried the Atkins diet and various other low-carb eating plans. He'd lose a little weight, then gain back as much or more. In the meantime, his family stayed active and went on ski trips. 'Annalyn is a marathon runner, and she's kept [the kids] in shape, but I think they've probably worried about me,' says Rasmussen. He tried to join their athletic activities, but skiing and hiking were hard on his overburdened joints. Two of his sisters, who also struggled with their weight, found success with GLP-1 medications. Impressed with their progress, Rasmussen tried the new class of weight loss drugs too. Within a year, he dropped 80 pounds. 'Being there for my family was the goal,' he says.
Not only can Rasmussen now join the family ski trips, but hiking and spending time outdoors are day-to-day ways he bonds with his kids. His weight loss 'has definitely allowed us as a family to do more healthy activities,' Rasmussen says. Plus, his good habits have rubbed off on his children. Desserts, once a staple, are reserved for special occasions, and the household's midnight snacking has all but disappeared.
Rasmussen's new body has also allowed him to get back in touch with his fashion sense. 'I like to look good and dress well, but when you're big, [that's] difficult,' he says. Now that he's lost weight, 'being able to dress with purpose in the morning has probably been one of the best things for me and my mental health,' says Rasmussen. And he's not the only one who's noticed his new look. One of his daughter's friends used the viral 'hear me out' cake trend on TikTok as an excuse to show some appreciation for Rasmussen. 'She said, 'hear me out, but Charlie's dad is attractive,'' Rasmussen explains. 'But [Charlie] was a good sport, she laughed about it.'
Bland's now adult children grew up knowing him as the ultra-fit dad, who was always on the go for his job as a pharmaceutical researcher, or hitting the gym to train for his next big event. But he was always fighting against his genetics. 'I come from a long line of fluffy people,' Bland says.
He spent his own childhood watching his mother constantly watch her weight. Despite avoiding smoking and drinking and maintaining a reasonably healthy diet, she eventually had to have both of her knees and one hip replaced and also suffered a stroke, 'all of which can be attributed to [extra] weight on your frame,' says Bland. Recognizing his family's propensity to obesity was part of what drove Bland to be so disciplined. 'But my genetics eventually outran my lifestyle,' he says.
Even with the same routines in place, Bland gained weight in his early 50s, saw his A1C and blood pressure rise, and had inflammation in his hips and knees. And Bland admits that vanity was also a factor. The shirtless man in his vacation photos no longer looked like the version of himself he expected to see. 'I gained about 35 pounds in 10 years; it was the classic 'man-o-pause,'' he says.
Though he didn't meet the clinical qualifications for brand-name GLP-1 medications, Bland tried compounded tirzepatide, suspecting that it would not only help him keep weight off but also reduce the inflammation in his joints. Once he started the medication, 'it was literally like somebody flipped a switch,' says Bland. The food noise (constant, intrusive thoughts about food) disappeared. He no longer ate just because he was bored. The joint pain was barely noticeable, and his workout recovery time improved. He also started to look more like himself in gym selfies.
Bland didn't initially tell his children that he was taking GLP-1 medications. But one of his adult sons noticed that Bland was looking pretty shredded in some of his photos; in fact, he was a bit concerned. He told his father, 'You've lost so much weight and went from really fluffy to really not. Are you sure you're not ... taking PEDs,' meaning performance-enhancing drugs, recalls Bland. Though Bland, now 53, has been taking testosterone replacement therapy for years, that and the GLP-1 have allowed him to return to the weight and energy levels of his younger years. And he's now switched to a very low maintenance dose of tirzepatide to make sure he doesn't lose too much weight. 'It's been a little bit of a return to what they were used to when they were kids,' he says of his new — or, maybe more accurately, restored — bod. 'And I feel like I'm back to the person that my wife married,' Bland adds.
