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How Nick Gray, son of Eddie, is paying tribute to his brother: ‘It's a way to keep his memory alive'
How Nick Gray, son of Eddie, is paying tribute to his brother: ‘It's a way to keep his memory alive'

New York Times

time12 hours ago

  • Health
  • New York Times

How Nick Gray, son of Eddie, is paying tribute to his brother: ‘It's a way to keep his memory alive'

You will always remember those people who are by your side, propping you up, in your darkest moments. For Nick Gray and his family, it's the hospice staff who cared for his brother, Stuart, through his final days. Nick and Stuart are the sons of Leeds United legend Eddie Gray (main photo: Stuart on the left, Eddie in the middle, Nick to the right). The former is currently on his latest fundraising drive in memory of his sibling, who died from cholangiocarcinoma, a rare form of liver cancer, in January 2024, at just 50 years old. Advertisement Nick, 39, is trying to complete 25 separate events throughout 2025 to raise money for Saint Michael's Hospice in the Yorkshire town of Harrogate, a 30-minute drive north from Leeds. The care and support the Gray family received through that harrowing time in their lives has stayed with Nick, who felt he needed to do something after Stuart's death. 'They are drastically underfunded,' he tells The Athletic. 'It's such a great place. It's very close to mine and my family's hearts. We saw how well Stuart was looked after while he was there. They made his final few weeks as comfortable, peaceful and as pleasant as possible in that situation.' The activities range from a 22-mile (35km) swimming challenge to a 12km (seven-mile) obstacle course and, crucially, shared experiences with Stuart's sons. You can read more about Nick and his endeavours here. Stuart is survived by five children and his partner, Rachel. Nick, who is going at this despite a long-standing back issue which stopped him playing football 15 years ago, will caddy as Stuart's son Jacob tackles 72 golf holes in a day, and will run Glasgow's half-marathon with Adam, another of his nephews. He may even take the fundraising on into 2026 and finish his push with the London Marathon. Stuart was diagnosed with cholangiocarcinoma in June 2023, when it was already at stage four — the most serious. At that point, Nick says, it was clear to the family that it was terminal and they were hoping for a miracle. They looked into clinical trials and innovative treatments, but none of it was possible for Stuart. He died at Saint Michael's, with his loved ones around him, just seven months after that initial diagnosis. 'It was very, very difficult,' Nick says. 'As you do in those situations, you just get on with it. It was particularly difficult and awful for Stuart's partner and his children. We were there, as best we could, to support Stuart and support them. You just do what you can. It was inevitable, what was going to happen. We knew it was coming, but when it does come, it's never easy. Advertisement 'People deal with grief in different ways. In reflecting on how I've dealt with that, my go-to was to think, 'Right, well, what can I do next? How can I support the people who supported us?'. That's been my coping mechanism.' News of Stuart's illness and eventual passing rocked his loved ones, and the wider football community too. The family are tied to the very fabric of Leeds United, including Harry, 16, and 19-year-old Archie Gray wearing the shirt in recent years, but Stuart himself had a good career as a pro between 1992 and 2006, playing for Celtic, Reading and Rushden & Diamonds among others. The family's first fundraising campaign, after Stuart's original diagnosis, was dedicated to securing the expensive and inaccessible treatments he needed. Sadly, as his condition deteriorated, the options became fewer and fewer. More than £50,000 was raised through that campaign, and the money ended up being donated to AMMF, the UK's only cholangiocarcinoma charity, and to Saint Michael's. Nick went on to raise a further £2,424 for AMMF in September 2024 by completing the 24 Peaks Trek, which takes in 24 of the English Lake District's highest peaks across two days. Nick is modest about the efforts he is putting into all this. He sees it as one important way of keeping his brother's memory alive, of ensuring everyone hears his story. 'It's a nice way — not that we will ever forget Stuart — to keep his memory alive and do something that keeps him fresh in the mind and shares his story with others,' he says. He just hopes the money he raises now can ensure other families will benefit from the priceless work the Harrogate hospice does for people in the community. His family is large but tight-knit, they were all together in those grim January days near the end with Stuart, when the hospice staff eased their pain as best they could. Advertisement 'We are very close as a family,' Nick says. 'We are all, for the most part, local to the area, so we were all here and able to kind of lean on each other through Stuart's illness. 'Even at the darkest times, the day Stuart passed away, we were all there, we were all with him. That's something that only strengthens that bond. 'We'll certainly never forget Stuart. We will keep talking about him. We'll keep his memory alive.' To donate and support Nick's efforts, click here. (Top photo courtesy of Nick Gray)

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