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'Time Will Pass Regardless': The Money And Career Wisdom Millennial Women Learned From Their Fathers
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For many millennial women, conversations about money and work with their fathers weren't formal sit-downs over spreadsheets or résumés—but deeply lived lessons modeled in early mornings, ironed clothes, and envelopes full of coins. While every family dynamic differs, a common thread persists: the guidance of a father figure can quietly shape a woman's relationship to financial security, ambition, and self-trust.
For Jacqueline Howard, Head of Money Wellness at Ally, the imprint of her late father remains indelible. 'He had this saying: Time will pass regardless,' she recalls. 'He said it so much that it became the soundtrack of my life. That belief is what pushed me to go back to school, get my master's, and keep learning.'
Howard's father, a Detroit police officer and Air Force reservist, instilled in her a fierce work ethic and a belief in education as a pathway to freedom.
'He worked 25 jobs if he had to,' she says. 'My twin brother and I went to private school because he never let his kids want for opportunity—even if it meant selling Avon on the side.' That foundation led her to Syracuse University—where a pivotal connection led to her current role at Ally.
Clinical therapist and entrepreneur Patrice N. Douglas, PsyD, shares a different, but equally resonant reflection.
'My father taught me to save every coin I had, and when the bucket was full, turn those coins into dollars,' says Douglas. 'He framed saving as a form of power and stability, not deprivation.'
As a child, she loved going to the bank with him to cash in her savings—a ritual that became the foundation of her financial habits.
'Now, I keep a 'purse fund.' If I can't pay cash, I don't need it. It taught me to value watching my money grow instead of needing to spend it right away.'
Brianna Van Zanten, 25, credits her father with teaching her to filter every financial decision through a lens of value.
'He always said, Never order grilled cheese at a restaurant,' she says with a laugh. 'It sounds silly, but it wasn't about the sandwich. It was about asking: Is this worth it? Am I paying for quality, convenience, or just the idea of something?'
Now a firm believer in what she calls 'smart spending,' Van Zanten sees investing not just as a financial move, but a mindset. 'Investing is fulfilling your wants, too. It's not just about spending less — it's about spending with intention. Even wants can be investments if they bring peace of mind or support your growth.'
Her father's thrifty habits—rooted in his upbringing as a pastor's son—also taught her the value of resourcefulness.
'Nothing went to waste. Buying used was default. First thrift stores, then Facebook Marketplace. New was the last resort. That mindset taught me patience, creativity, and that sustainability and savings can go hand in hand.'
Like Douglas and Howard, Van Zanten is eager to share her lessons forward. 'Most of the things people compliment in my apartment? Thrifted. It's kind of a sport now for me and my roommate,' she says.
All three women acknowledge the complexities in their fathers' approaches—some lessons, like overspending, came with later understanding and healing. But all agree that those teachings have helped them develop a strong sense of financial confidence.
'Teach your daughters balance,' Van Zanten advises. 'Use everyday moments to talk about value—not just in dollars, but in experience. Financial literacy isn't about deprivation. It's about intention.'
For Howard, it still comes back to her father's enduring mantra: 'Time will pass regardless. So get the degree. Take the course. Go study abroad. Spend on what matters. Because the time will pass either way—and what you do with it makes all the difference.'
