Latest news with #SheenaKumar
The Irish Sun
2 days ago
- Health
- The Irish Sun
I'm a psychologist and there are 5 things your kids must NEVER do if they have ADHD – or they risk making symptoms worse
MOST of us will know someone with ADHD - maybe a person in your friendship group, a work colleague, even your own son or daughter. While it's commonly understood that people with ADHD have difficulties with attention, hyperactivity, and impulsivity, it's less well known what can exacerbate symptoms, especially among children. 3 Around 708,000 children in the UK are estimated to have ADHD Credit: Getty Children are more likely to be diagnosed with ADHD - which stands for attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder - than adults. The condition can be identified at any age, but symptoms typically begin in childhood. While the condition affects both children and adults, the experience and challenges can differ significantly. Children often struggle more with hyperactivity and impulsivity, so knowing how not to exacerbate your child's symptoms is very important. There's been a notable increase in diagnoses over the past two decades, particularly among adults, and we know so much more about it - although figures suggest many cases remain undiagnosed. As of 2024, Prescriptions for ADHD increased significantly from around 25 items per 1,000 people in 2019-20 to 41.55 items in 2023-24. But this increase isn't necessarily due to a true surge in cases. It reflects a number of factors, such as increased awareness and recognition of the condition, updates in diagnostic guidelines, and sociocultural pressures such as overstimulating digital environments. While the rise partly reflects these factors, it also raises important questions about overdiagnosis, the medicalisation of typical behaviour, and the need for individualised care. Do you or your child have ADHD- Here's the NHS test as Brits waiting two years for diagnosis To better understand the condition, chartered counselling psychologist Dr Sheena Kumar shared everything you need to know - from telltale signs to what to avoid. Signs you might have ADHD ADHD isn't just about being hyper or distracted or struggling under a heavy workload, says Dr Kumar. Instead, it's a neurodevelopmental condition that affects how you focus, organise, and manage impulses. Dr Kumar explains: "While everyone struggles with attention sometimes, ADHD symptoms are persistent; they do not come and go. "They show up in different parts of life like work, school, and relationships, and make things feel harder than they should be." According to Dr Kumar, the following symptoms always start in childhood, even if they weren't recognised: Losing focus, even in conversations or reading Misplacing things, forgetting tasks, or missing deadlines Struggling to start or finish tasks that need mental effort Feeling restless, talking a lot, or interrupting without meaning, which impacts your relationships Having trouble managing time, emotions, or priorities For adults, it might look less like physical hyperactivity and more like feeling mentally scattered or overwhelmed all the time, says Dr Kumar. What NOT to do if you have ADHD For people with ADHD, their brain works differently to neurotypical people, especially in areas like attention, impulse control, and executive functioning. Because of this, some habits and choices can make symptoms worse or lead to burnout - especially for kids. Dr Kumar says: "You want to find ways to support your brain rather than to add extra demand to it." ADHD in children and young people Symptoms of ADHD usually start before the age of 12. A child or young person may show signs of being inattentive, such as: being easily distracted finding it hard to listen to what people are saying or to follow instructions forgetting everyday tasks, like brushing their teeth or putting on socks They may show signs of being hyperactive and impulsive, including: having high energy levels fidgeting or tapping their hands and feet talking noisily feeling restless, or getting up and moving around when they're supposed to sit still finding it hard to wait their turn, or interrupting conversations Most children and young people with ADHD have symptoms of both the inattentive and hyperactive-impulsive type. Some only show signs of one type. ADHD is thought to be recognised less often in girls than boys. This may be because girls with ADHD more commonly have inattentive symptoms and these can be harder to recognise. If you're worried that ADHD may be affecting your child, talk to one of their teachers. The teacher will usually make a referral to the school's special educational needs co-ordinator (SENCO), who can discuss support in the classroom or with homework, or help with building confidence and friendships. If you're still worried or you think your child needs additional support, you may want to make an appointment with a GP. Source: NHS Here are five things she recommends to avoid: 1. Prioritise sleep People with ADHD tend to have a higher rate of sleep disorders. For children, ADHD can lead to trouble falling asleep, staying asleep, and getting up in the morning. And sleep deprivation amplifies ADHD symptoms. It hinders the brain's ability to concentrate, making it more challenging for individuals with ADHD to stay focused and attentive. Dr Kumar advises: "Prioritise sleep, and if you struggle, research and try different ways to help sleep." 2. Don't overcommit The impulsivity and difficulty with time management associated with ADHD can contribute to taking on more tasks than one can realistically manage. Kids in particular may also struggle to say 'no'. This could be related to schoolwork, exams, or social situations such as hanging out with their friends. But overcommitment can be particularly problematic for individuals with ADHD, often leading to stress, burnout, and difficulty following through on commitments. Dr Kumar says: "Learning to say 'no' doesn't make you rude, it makes you honest." 3. 'Just try harder' The belief that someone with ADHD must exert extra effort to perform tasks can negatively impact self-esteem, warns Dr Kumar. This can be due to a combination of factors, including the feeling of being constantly behind, the internalisation of external criticism, and the challenges associated with emotional regulation. Telling a child with ADHD to 'just try harder' is ineffective and can be harmful because ADHD is a neurological condition, not a lack of effort or motivation. Instead of focusing on the perceived need to exert more effort, people with ADHD should adopt strategies to improve focus, organisation, and overall functioning. These strategies should be tailored to individual needs and preferences, and may include using tools to manage time and tasks, incorporating physical activity, and seeking professional guidance. 4. Ignore your emotions People with ADHD shouldn't ignore their emotions because neglecting them can lead to a number of difficulties. Children with ADHD may especially have difficulty regulating and managing their emotions. This can potentially result in intense outbursts and difficulty managing everyday situations. "Working on regulation skills helps," says Dr Kumar. 5. Never self-diagnose or self-medicate While parents are key to recognising potential ADHD symptoms and initiating the process of seeking a diagnosis from a doctor, they should never diagnose their child with the condition themselves. Self-diagnosing and self-medicating ADHD is strongly discouraged because it can lead to inaccurate diagnoses, ineffective treatment, and potential harm. A formal diagnosis requires a thorough evaluation by a qualified healthcare professional, and treatment plans should be tailored to individual needs under the supervision of a medical professional. You risk the danger of making symptoms worse, says Dr Kumar. ADHD in adults In adults, ADHD often manifests as inattentiveness, hyperactivity, and impulsivity, though these can be less pronounced than in children. These challenges can significantly impact various aspects of life, including work, relationships, and daily tasks. You may show signs of being inattentive, such as: being easily distracted or forgetful finding it hard to organise your time finding it hard to follow instructions or finish tasks losing things often, like your wallet, mobile or keys You may show signs of being hyperactive and impulsive, including: having a lot of energy or feeling restless being very talkative or interrupting conversations making quick decisions without thinking about what might happen as a result If your ADHD symptoms are affecting your studies, work or relationships, make an appointment with a GP to find out what support is available. At your appointment, the GP will ask about your symptoms and how they affect your life. They may also want to consider other conditions that could be causing your symptoms, such as autism, Tourette's or anxiety, to help you get the right care. After the appointment, the GP may decide to refer you for an assessment with a mental health professional specialising in ADHD. Source: NHS The best way to get diagnosed 3 Visit your GP and ask for a referral to go the NHS route Credit: Getty To go down the NHS route, visit your GP and ask for a referral to an ADHD specialist (only certain professionals are qualified to diagnose, such as psychiatrists and psychologists). Dr Kumar advises: "You'll usually be asked to bring examples of how your symptoms affect your daily life. "But note - while the NHS pathway is free, unfortunately waiting times can be up to three years. "If a private assessment is an option for you, diagnosis tends to be a lot quicker. "In my clinic I also do online ADHD assessment and diagnosis with adults." What happens if ADHD is never diagnosed? ADHD that is never diagnosed can hide under layers of frustration, burnout, or health issues. A diagnosis can be the first step toward understanding yourself, finding effective strategies, and feeling less alone. Dr Kumar adds: "Many people experience underachievement, feeling capable but consistently falling short due to disorganisation, missed deadlines, or procrastination. "This often leads to low self-esteem, with individuals internalising harmful beliefs like 'I'm lazy' which can increase the risk of anxiety and depression. "Without understanding the root cause, people may turn to coping mechanisms like excessive caffeine, or other substances to self-regulate. "Relationships may also suffer due to impulsivity, forgetfulness, or emotional reactivity, all of which can create unnecessary conflict. "Getting a diagnosis can bring clarity, relief, and a starting point for meaningful support." How ADHD is treated 3 Psychological therapies, such as cognitive-behavioural therapy (CBT) can help people with ADHD Credit: Getty For some people, just knowing their diagnosis brings relief as it helps them to make sense of themselves and they do not want formalised treatment. For those that want treatment, that can look like a combination of medication, psychological support, and lifestyle adjustments, says Dr Kumar. She explains: "Psychological therapies, such as cognitive-behavioural therapy (CBT), support managing time, emotions, and daily challenges, often alongside coaching and family education. "Lifestyle changes like establishing routines, using organisational tools, exercising, and prioritising good sleep also play an important role. "Schools may provide additional support through formal plans, and regular follow-ups with healthcare professionals ensure the treatment is effective and adjusted as needed. "Overall, treatment is personalised to help improve daily functioning and quality of life."
The Sun
31-05-2025
- General
- The Sun
The 6-step plan to beat ‘decision paralysis' – plus the 3 reasons you fall victim
THROUGHOUT our lives, we will face many crossroads – moving home, changing jobs, starting or staying in a relationship – and constant decision-making can be overwhelming. Decision paralysis – AKA finding it so hard to make a choice that we don't do anything – often wins. Other factors, such as anxiety, perfectionism and neurodiversity, can impact our ability to make decisions, too. And for women, deciding what we really want can be even harder. 'Often, we are trying to make other people happy, when it is more important that we make ourselves happy with our decisions,' says chartered psychologist Dr Sheena Kumar. So, what happens in our brains when we're faced with a decision? 'We weigh past experiences, potential outcomes and personal values to arrive at a choice,' says Sheena. But emotions like fear, excitement or uncertainty all have an impact, too. Here, three experts share their six tips for coming to a decision you're happy with. Step One: Pause And Focus First, stop and tune in to what your body is saying. 'When faced with big choices, your nervous system may enter fight, flight or freeze mode, making clear thinking impossible,' explains Sarah Jones, psychotherapist and EMDR therapist. Fight, flight and freeze are evolutionary stress responses to danger – fight prepares you to confront the threat, flight makes you want to escape, and freeze makes you, well, freeze. Do you think you've got ADHD because of TikTok? These are the signs 'When we are in survival mode, our bodies prioritise protecting themselves over problem-solving,' says Sarah. Before analysing your options, take a moment to check in with yourself. 'How does your body feel? Is your chest tight? Is your stomach churning? If so, take slow, deep breaths, inhaling through your nose and exhaling through your mouth, and focus on the sensation of breathing. Repeat to yourself: 'I am safe',' Sarah adds. Calmer? Now you can focus on what's at the heart of your decision. It may sound simple, but Sheena suggests clearly defining the decision, asking: 'What do I need to decide?' Step Two: Free Yourself From People's Opinions Now comes the hard part. 'Ask yourself: 'If no one else's opinion mattered, what would I truly want?'' says Sarah. 'Write down whatever comes up. "Then reflect on whether any of your concerns stem from other people's expectations, rather than your own desires. "Many women have been raised to prioritise others' needs over their own, often without realising it. "Even if you consider yourself independent, societal messaging can still shape your decision-making process.' But that doesn't mean you need to make decisions alone. 'Gather relevant information to understand your options,' says Sheena. For example, try talking to people who have chosen each option, so you can listen to their experiences, then decide for yourself. Step Three: Understand What's Holding You Back Thoughts running on a loop? Writing everything down will help make things feel more manageable, says life coach Kimberley O'Sullivan. She believes the key to good decision-making is identifying ' self-limiting beliefs ' and negative thoughts. You can do this by assigning the word 'fact' or 'fiction' to the thoughts you've written down. 'For example, if you're weighing up a new job offer, 'the salary is £10k more' is fact, whereas: 'I may not fit in with the team' is fiction,' she says. 'Fiction' is often the voice of self-doubt. ' Once you've looked at each limitation and have clarity that what's holding you back is a set of false, limiting beliefs, you are left with facts and data to help make an informed decision.' Step Four Let Go Of Perfection What if limiting beliefs come from a trait or mindset, such as perfectionism? 'Many people believe a decision must be 100% right or else it's a mistake, but this kind of thinking keeps you stuck,' says Sarah. 'Instead of searching for the perfect choice, ask yourself: 'What is a good enough option that moves me forward?' "Also, it's OK to change your mind.' Step Five: Test It Out To put your decision to the test, use the 'future self' visualisation, which involves imagining yourself six months or even a year from now, having made the big decision. 'Picture your day-to-day life,' says Sarah. 'What's changed? How do you feel? "Now, do the same for an alternative decision. "How does that version of your future feel in comparison? "Often, your emotional response will provide valuable insight,' she says. You could even 'try on' your decision mentally for 48 hours. 'Act as if you have already chosen a path,' she says. "If you're debating moving abroad, tell yourself: 'I'm moving abroad', and notice how you feel. 'Does this bring a sense of excitement, relief or peace? "Or does it trigger anxiety and resistance? "Your emotions can offer more clarity than over-analysing ever will,' she says. Step Six: Move things on Once you've decided, let go of the idea of possibly taking the 'wrong' path. 'Make your decision with confidence, take action and reflect on the outcome to improve future decision-making,' says Sheena. 4 'Making any decision is better than staying indecisive. "Remember, you can always reflect and choose differently next time.' Sarah, too, believes that making a bad decision is still better than not making one at all. 'It's important to make a decision and then learn from it, rather than stay in paralysis and let opportunity pass you by, or change your mind if it is not working out,' she says. 'Often, there is no such thing as the 'right' decision – just ones we are happy with in hindsight.' And if you're still feeling worried? Remember that not all decisions are final. When it comes to big decisions over something like a new job, partner or moving to a new location, Kimberley says: 'You can always try something new. "Setbacks and adjustments are all a part of life – you just need to believe you can navigate and pivot your way through anything you experience.' Why Do I Agonise Over it? If you constantly struggle to make choices, it might be a sign that. . . You Grew Up In A Critical Home If mistakes weren't tolerated in your childhood, you may struggle to trust your own judgement as an adult. Instead of seeing decisions as opportunities, they can feel like tests you must pass. You're Seeking Approval If you're constantly weighing up how others will react, or you want to please people, you may struggle to prioritise your own needs. Conditions such as ADHD and autism can make decision-making harder, due to executive-function challenges, sensory overwhelm and difficulty filtering options. The brain can freeze when faced with too much information.
