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Straits Times
2 days ago
- Entertainment
- Straits Times
Will sparks fly? 40 S'poreans going on 'Single's Inferno' trips to Japan to find love
Those going on the trip will be staying at a villa in Ugata, Japan. Will sparks fly? 40 S'poreans going on 'Single's Inferno' trips to Japan to find love Shermaine Ang The Straits Times June 8, 2025 In a few weeks' time, five women and five men will be flying to a villa in Japan on a trip inspired by South Korean reality television series Single's Inferno. The participants will not have met before going on the four-day, three-night trip, and will share a room with those of the same gender, as in the show. They are paying $1,111 each for a yacht trip, an Osaka day trip and an activity of their choice such as Universal Studios Japan and tea ceremony in Nara, among other things. Around 40 Singaporeans have signed up for three such trips, planned by Nanyang Academy of Fine Arts design practice student Leo Ching Ling, 24, and business owner Ric Ang, 50. The pair, who met while Ms Leo was interning at a company Mr Ang was working in, have held around 10 social mixers around the numerology theme since August 2024 under their events brand Until 1111. Their parties offer compatibility readings, tarot card readings and purpose-infused crystal-making. Numerology is a practice that assigns a number to individuals based on their birthdate and name. The belief is that these numbers hold insights into personality, life path and potential. The parties are some of the latest initiatives to help sparks fly among singles, offering an alternative to dating apps. Others include singles pitch nights and dating mixers bringing games seen on platforms like YouTube and TikTok to the public. These events tend to be small-scale, with guests vetted for a more intimate setting. The idea for the trip came when Mr Ang's friend, who owns a villa in Japan, reached out to him to collaborate. Ms Leo said that they shared the idea on TikTok, and many expressed interest. "A trip together would be a good chance to create a core memory with each other, as well as a potentially long-lasting relationship." Participants asked to see photos of one another before the trip, but Ms Leo refused, wanting to keep the "surprise element" and not have them judge one another based on physical looks before meeting. Held every month, their mixers are attended by 20 to more than 40 guests bonding over speed dating, tarot readings and other activities. For some singles, signing up for such mixers is a way to expand their social circle and boost their odds of finding a partner after leaving school. Ms Lim Yun Qian and Ms Lynette Kee started a series of Plus One dating mixers in February as an answer to dating app fatigue, under their Footnotes initiative, which offers hosted experiences. Nearly 1,000 signed up for the three Plus One dating mixers held since February. PHOTO: FOOTNOTES SG "I think the idea of a 'meet cute' or meeting in a real life situation is something that everyone wants," said Ms Lim. "We want to make people comfortable," she added, likening their role to hosting a house party. Nearly 1,000 signed up for the three mixers, but each session was capped at 48 participants. Participants were chosen based on a form outlining their goals for the event, with online profiles reviewed to curate a more compatible group, said Ms Kee. Participants, who were aged 24 to 35, came with a friend as their "plus one" to put them at ease. Ms Lim and Ms Kee, who are both 29, tapped their expertise as full-time creative producers to create experiences usually seen on dating shows on TV and YouTube. The mixers' activities included doing a pitch for the single friend, helping to pass on messages to someone their friend was eyeing, or going around doing challenges on a Bingo card. The prize for the winning pitch was a 10-minute speed date with someone of the winner's choice, set up by the organisers. The meticulous curation of guests paid off for one attendee, who said: "The selection of people was quite well put together. Everyone was friendly and willing to meet people. The activities made things a little less awkward." Added the 30-year-old content strategist, who declined to be named: "App interactions are fleeting, so an in-person event feels like you get to know people a bit more before you cast judgment." Although he is not dating anyone from the two Plus One mixers he attended, he has made friends who he has gone bouldering with. Ms Joell Tee, who founded Dinner with Strangers in 2022, started co-hosting singles pitch nights called Fishbowl, inspired by American reality TV show Shark Tank, where entrepreneurs make business pitches to investors. "The premise feels quite low stakes, friendly and safe. Signing up with your friends kind of takes the edge off a dating event, because even if nothing comes out of it, it's still something that you were able to do with your friends, and it's still fun," said the 28-year-old, who works as a project manager in a bank. Attendees at Fishbowl, where people pitch their single friends to other singles. PHOTO: TIPSY FLAMINGO Around 160 people in their early 20s to late 30s have attended the three pitch nights held since August 2024. Attendee Denise Ong, 27, said going through the motions on dating apps has turned into "a numbers game where everyone starts to treat each other as disposable". "While the main objective (of going to Fishbowl) is to find a partner, I think it was nice to be reminded of everyone's humanity and individuality," said the marketing executive. It was her first time being pitched to a crowd. "I was a bit nervous, naturally. But I saw the deck beforehand, plus she's my best friend and knows me inside out, so overall I was enjoying it, even though I was a little 'paiseh'." Still, some singles have reservations about attending newfangled dating events, which may not meet expectations. Ms Ong went for a social mixer by Never Strangers, run by entertainment company Unfiltered, where she was drawn to a participant but later found out that he was not looking to date. She added: "There were even people who signed up together, and just didn't talk to anyone the entire night." "I think the more 'mass' these events are, the more superficial and unlikely it is to have good conversations, and I really do feel like that's what it's all about." Another participant Khor Kai Xiang, 29, who went for the same event, said he was matched with a man due to male participants outnumbering females. One Fishbowl participant, 29-year-old Nick, said he and his friend put together more "haphazard" presentations than the other participants who took the pitch more seriously. Nick, who works in finance and declined to give his full name, said: "We were slightly taken aback that some participants went straight to listing their expectations or requirements. The subjects ranged from marriage, number of children, to the infamous BTO (Build-To-Order flats)." Less crowd, more chemistry Meanwhile, Mr Lim, a 26-year-old financial adviser who did not give his full name, said his friends questioned why he was going to an Until 1111 mixer, pointing to a stigma attached to dating events. Little did he know he would meet a girl at the party's speed dating segment - though their brief conversation went "terribly". She was not interested in him at first, as he was a year younger than her and shared the same name as her former boyfriend. But he slipped her a note to say he enjoyed talking to her and hoped to keep in touch. They went out with a group of friends from the event a few weeks later, and he succeeded in asking her out after. "I was really lucky. These things are really hit or miss," said Mr Lim, adding that both his girlfriend and himself are introverts. "She's funny in her own way. She's a bit weird, but I'm also weird, and I just feel like she just complements me, and I can talk to her about anything. She's sort of like my safe place." Yet others have found love in interest group communities. Mr Luqman Rahamat, 33, met his girlfriend Elise Tan, 28, at non-fiction book club, The Saturday Book Club. Mr Luqman Rahamat met his girlfriend Elise Tan at non-fiction book club The Saturday Book Club. PHOTO: COURTESY OF LUQMAN RAHAMAT Mr Luqman, a maths tutor, and Ms Tan, a pre-school teacher, first chatted about decluttering, and Ms Tan lent him a book on minimalism called Love People, Use Things. They then went to check out the social enterprise bookshop Books Beyond Borders. She was intrigued by his blog posts detailing his travels and analysing dating apps and other topics using mathematical concepts. The couple made it official over a year ago. "It feels like the universe planned it for me. I was in a phase of self-improvement and didn't have any expectations on finding a long-term partner," said Mr Luqman. "She made me feel like I am enough and also taught me how to love myself more and accept my flaws." To romantic hopefuls, he has this advice: "If dating apps don't work, move to communities where you can meet people, be yourself and find someone who can appreciate and accept you for who you are." Click here to contribute a story or submit it to our WhatsApp Get more of Stomp's latest updates by following us on:
Singapore Law Watch
19-05-2025
- Singapore Law Watch
Pre-sentencing therapy helps offenders with underlying issues to break cycle of reoffending
Pre-sentencing therapy helps offenders with underlying issues to break cycle of reoffending Source: Straits Times Article Date: 19 May 2025 Author: Shermaine Ang The Pathways to Accountability, Change and Transformation (Pact) programme was launched by social enterprise Centre for Psychotherapy (C4P) in January 2024 to fill a critical gap in the justice system – pre-sentencing intervention. Being bullied throughout secondary school left Nick (not his real name) struggling with depression and anxiety. When he was unable to find a job in his 20s, he began to isolate himself at home. He turned to pornography as an escape for his 'absolute despair', and subsequently discovered voyeuristic content, which led him to film an upskirt video. This soon escalated to a spree, with him filming such videos every two or three days 'on autopilot'. After he was arrested in 2024, he felt helpless and came close to reoffending. The 32-year-old was referred by his lawyer to a programme designed to provide psychological support for first-time offenders. The Pathways to Accountability, Change and Transformation (Pact) programme was launched by social enterprise Centre for Psychotherapy (C4P) in January 2024 to fill a critical gap in the justice system – pre-sentencing intervention – said C4P senior counsellor and Pact founder Gopal Mahey. This is defined as the period between when a person is charged and when he is sentenced, which can take anywhere from four weeks to one year. 'While legal representation is often prioritised, we saw a need for structured support to address the deeper psychological and behavioural factors that contribute to offending,' Mr Gopal said. For instance, sexual offences among young people can stem from an early exposure to pornography, absence of guidance, emotional isolation and adverse childhood experiences, with offenders internalising distorted ideas from online content. The idea behind the programme is upstream rehabilitation and early intervention to hopefully disrupt cycles of harm, reduce reoffending, and build long-term reintegration potential. Mr Gopal said there is a 'rupture' in the identity of an individual who commits an offence, and hence a need for the offender to rewrite his narrative. Psychological and social support catered to each offender helps them to break the cycle of reoffending and successfully reintegrate into society, he added. Pact is tailored for those facing criminal charges, especially first-time or non-violent offences, as well as for young people and adults navigating addiction, mental health issues or identity struggles. Offenders are referred to the programme by lawyers and the State Courts to rehabilitate them. Pre-sentencing psychotherapy is separate from mitigation, and pre-sentencing psychotherapy reports are not meant to influence the outcome of court proceedings or dictate sentencing, said Mr Gopal. Pact includes individual and family therapy sessions, as well as a fortnightly support group. Its activities include letter-writing exercises to empathise with victims. Pact has since supported 97 offenders, 41 of whom committed sexual crimes. Of the rest, 25 committed financial crimes, including theft; 19 committed violent crimes; 10 committed substance abuse or trafficking; and two committed traffic offences and public nuisance. Over half of the participants were aged 19 to 29, and about a quarter were aged 30 to 39. Ten of the 97 were women. Pre-sentence support for offenders is not widely available in Singapore, with only a handful of organisations offering this service. The charity Prison Fellowship Singapore started offering pre-sentence support in 2020, and the service has helped 48 offenders and their families since then. Under the service, care managers and social workers prepare first-time offenders for what to expect for their sentence and in prison, including when their families and the charity's care managers can visit them. Prison Fellowship Singapore also refers offenders or their families who need extra help – such as with the implications of incarceration on the family – to the psychologists it partners with. Lawyer James Gomez of Edmond Pereira Law Corporation said he refers to Pact young people and those with addictions, or deeper psychological factors that contribute to offending. Lawyer Kalaithasan Karuppaya of Regent Law refers clients to Pact for a 'holistic' approach to resolve court matters, as some issues clients struggle with are out of the area of expertise of lawyers. Mr Gomez said clinical counselling and psychotherapy reports put together by C4P on the offenders also help lawyers to bring up mitigating factors, such as childhood trauma, to the court, to seek a lighter sentence for their clients. He added that he has seen young clients who were loan sharks coming out of the programme telling him about their aspirations to make money in a different way – by establishing their professional careers. Mr Kalaithasan said he has seen clients he referred for pre-sentence support stay out of trouble with the law. 'They become more disciplined. They appreciate the effort by other people to help them out. So far, I do not have repeat clients who come back with similar issues.' Mr Gopal said he is working towards doubling Pact's annual capacity from 70 to 140 participants. The programme is run by four staff and two interns. Down the line, he hopes to potentially integrate Pact as a national upstream rehabilitation option supporting young people and first-time adult offenders before sentencing. Things are looking up for Nick, who is under forensic investigation for voyeurism and possession of offensive material. He is waiting to be formally charged. Since his arrest, the self-employed marketer has spent a year in therapy, including counselling sessions with his parents, and support group sessions. The sessions have helped him to shift the focus to his parents and what he wants to achieve for himself. He said his father, whom he barely spoke to in years, now leaves him canned iced coffees in the fridge. He also travelled overseas with his family for the first time in a long while. He has managed to find two good friends after 'putting himself out there' and joining online groups, and is now motivated to help others who are bullied or struggling with mental illnesses. 'The small positive steps that I've taken after my arrest actually cumulated in something bigger. So now I'm at a point where better things are happening for me, and it's like a positive loop,' he said. Beyond pre-sentencing, Pact provides support to offenders in prison and up to 12 months post-release. Another participant, Tim (not his real name), also turned to filming upskirt videos as an escape when stress from his work and conflicts with his wife made him feel 'out of control'. 'Doing something that felt wrong, that feeling was very addictive,' he recalled. Tim was jailed for three months in 2019 for voyeurism, and three weeks in 2024 for trespass on a female dormitory in a tertiary institution. He held distorted thoughts around the girls he took upskirt videos of – that they wanted to show off by dressing 'provocatively', and that he was not touching or harming them when he filmed them. Tim said having Pact's support from January 2024, at the referral of his lawyer, helped him figure out why he felt the way he did. 'When I first came in, I actually remember thinking that Mr Gopal could have seen similar cases happen so many times that he is one step ahead of us.' Tim, who is in his early 30s, has since returned to volunteer with Pact's support group. 'Some people have been committing an offence because it has been something that they feel they have no choice but to keep doing. They don't have something else to replace it. 'So without all this support, it's very easy to reoffend. The only thing that is stopping them is fear.' He said having others journey with him offered him a way out, reminding him that he was not alone. It is a reminder, he said, to those who have served their sentences: 'You still deserve to live a meaningful and fulfilling life that also helps to contribute positively to society.' Source: The Straits Times © SPH Media Limited. 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