24-05-2025
Hear Me Out: Bring back gatekeeping – when everything is a hidden gem, nothing is any more
Anyone with a smartphone can make content out of every meal, tourist attraction or shopping haul – pushing us into a cycle of consuming, and then giving, the same few recommendations over and over again. PHOTO: ISTOCKPHOTO
Hear Me Out: Bring back gatekeeping – when everything is a hidden gem, nothing is any more
SINGAPORE – What a difference a year makes to special places.
For me, that place was a once-discreet flea market in Tokyo that, though huge , was frequented mostly by locals and avid thrifters who knew where to look and what to Google.
In early 2024, I could still comfortably stroll the aisles, maintaining a wide berth between myself and the Japanese treasure hunters who had braved the commute for a bargain. The wares were good and the prices even better, and I left with three bags full of steals.
So colour me horrified when, on my return in 2025, I showed up to hordes of tourists thronging the market, some dragging suitcases – presumably to source stock for their second-hand stores, a global trend which has ballooned in the past year.
This time, I left with just a vintage watch.
I knew exactly who to blame. TikTok, of course. Over the last year, I had noticed more foreign content creators making travel vlogs on Japan, recommending that very flea market and showing off their spoils in overzealous haul videos.
'Come with me to Tokyo's biggest flea market,' began each video in the same grating, unplaceable influencer accent. With every vocal fry, the lustre around this 'insider' market faded away.
Ladies and gentlemen, we need to bring back good old gatekeeping.
The term has taken on new life in the social media age to mean an intentional withholding of information or knowledge – usually applied to beauty products, good buys, food recommendations and the like. On the internet, gatekeeping is the mark of a woman who is not a 'girl's girl', because only the mean and spiteful would dare keep an underrated lipstick to herself.
A few weeks back, American TikTok was in an uproar over a girl recounting how a well-dressed stranger at the Silverlake Flea in Los Angeles had refused to share where she bought her cowboy boots. The Internet split into two camps – one on a mission to dox this audacious gatekeeper; the other crowing another common online phrase: 'It's not that deep.'
It really wasn't. But before you brush me off as entitled and self-centred, hear me out. Remember the good ol' days when people didn't all go to the same few places or buy the same things, and 'hidden gems' were authentic gems?
In this era of content creation, TikTok has empowered anyone with a smartphone to make content out of every meal, tourist attraction or shopping haul – pushing us into a cycle of consuming, and then giving, the same few recommendations over and over again, and causing the masses to flood (and ruin) once exclusive, well-kept secrets.
It is probably why we have ended up with a satirical obsession with 'hidden gems'. In a bid to find something worth highlighting, we may have taken the well-meaning Singaporean mantra of 'good things must share' too far. When everything is a hidden gem, nothing is any more.
On a more macro scale, herd mentality may be exacerbating overtourism in popular destinations like Japan and Bali.
According to the Japan Tourism Agency, the number of foreign visitors to Japan in 2024 was 36.87 million, a staggering figure its government is trying to counter by raising the tourist tax. Meanwhile, record numbers of tourists to Bali prompted the local government to launch a new tourism police unit in February 2024 to deal with problematic visitors.
Herd mentality may be exacerbating overtourism in popular destinations like Japan.
PHOTO: EPA-EFE
I would also argue that the lack of gatekeeping is killing personal style.
These days, travel guides to each city are outlined not by the human stories and culture of the place, but by a checklist of what to buy. In Seoul, it is Gentle Monster or Blue Elephant sunglasses, and any handbag from Marge Sherwood, Stand Oil or Osoi. In Shanghai, Songmont bags and To Summer perfume.
Style trends have always had an iron grip on the masses, but at least in the past, they were not plastered online as must-buys. Social media has turned people into sheep who fear they are missing out if they go to Japan and don't leave with Onitsuka Tiger sneakers, or that they must all own the same pair of Miu Miu tortoiseshell glasses – even if the round frame is notoriously unflattering on most face shapes.
The ability to rigorously research and consume social media within minutes is rewiring our ability to pause and practise critical thinking, and robbing us of independent thought. If 10 people on the internet say you 'have' to get something, they can't all be wrong – right?
I won't lie. I had to pause a couple of times on my recent Tokyo trip to ask myself: Do I really want this? Or is it just because TikTok told me I should?
It also takes away the mystique of self-discovery – whether shopping or travelling – and the rewarding feeling of stumbling upon something truly special by yourself.
Dear reader, let us return to the age of word of mouth, where the best recs were traded only among family and friends, and the occasional acquaintance who asked nicely.
After all, real 'it' girl status is in the IYKYK ('if you know, you know'). From Audrey Hepburn and Chloe Sevigny to Alexa Chung and Hailey Bieber , true 'it' girls don't go around shouting out their favourite brands or restaurants – unless they are paid to. You simply spot them photographed on the streets sporting various handbags or shoes, before going down a rabbit hole to find out which designers made them.
To unpack it further, one could argue that un-gatekeeping is a by-product of capitalism. Brands want you to overshare and over-recommend. Pushing products on the internet in the name of not gatekeeping does not make it any more virtuous than dangling a promo code or affiliate link to the item. Good things must share, right?
I am no monster and will gladly divulge a good hidden gem if asked with earnestness. But not everything needs to be publicly shared. In an era where so many things lose meaning as quickly as they gain them, a healthy amount of gatekeeping would leave us all better off.
So, the next time you find yourself tempted to post about an item or place, or tag its location, maybe put the phone down. The dreamers and wanderers among us thank you.
Hear Me Out is a new series where young journalists (over)share on topics ranging from navigating friendships to self-loathing, and the occasional intrusive thought.
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