10-03-2025
The Au Pair, Channel 5 review: the sort of schlocky mindless fun that makes you binge the lot
If you're in the mood for some enjoyably schlocky nonsense, Channel 5's The Au Pair fits the bill. It's the kind of mile-a-minute, OTT thriller in which 25 outlandish things happen in the first episode. You know the sort of thing. As in a cartoon, everyone who gets a bash to the head is knocked out cold. Villains administer potentially lethal injections to their enemies on a regular basis. Someone gets tied up in the boot of a car. All of this happens in the Cotswolds.
Well, the caption tells us this is taking place in the Cotswolds, but there isn't a Cotswold stone in sight and it appears to have been filmed somewhere else for budgetary reasons. Never mind, it looks very pretty. Into the idyllic life of Zoe (Sally Bretton), who lives in a beautiful house with her family, comes a French au pair. You can never trust the French. Particularly this one, because she is on a dastardly mission to ruin Zoe and her family. But why? All will be revealed, in increasingly fraught instalments.
There are strong echoes of the 1990s thriller The Hand That Rocks the Cradle. Sandrine (Ludmilla Makowski) arrives at the home of Zoe and Chris (Kenny Doughty) in response to an advert for an au pair. The couple have been married for three years and Zoe is stepmother to Chris's two children, while going through her own fertility struggles and grieving the loss of a baby. Zoe's dad (a lovely turn from David Suchet) lives in the annexe. Sandrine soon makes herself indispensable while also trying to bump everyone off. Every second scene seems to involve her eavesdropping behind a door.
There is attention to detail in places – the costume designer has got it spot on, particularly with Suchet's wardrobe of retired doctor smart casualwear – but you could drive a luxury SUV through the plotholes, and don't get me started on the stepdaughter's schoolfriend who is eight months pregnant and hiding it from her parents yet doesn't seem to be all that worried about it. And why does Sandrine need to have one of those evidence walls from crime shows, covered in photographs and Post-it notes?
Still, it's mindless fun, and I rushed to watch the second episode straight after the first. Plus, it's elevated by a classy performance from Makowski, who exudes Gallic cool.
