12 hours ago
Child-Free Woman Praised for Eye-Opening Question to Parents
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A child-free woman from Ontario, Canada, has been praised online after asking parents a thought-provoking question.
Tiffany J. Marie (@ told Newsweek the reaction after she said that parents who visit her page tell her she will "never know what it's like" to have kids.
"'I love them unconditionally, it's visceral. I would die for my child. OK, but would you live for them?" Marie asked in a reel on Instagram.
From left: Tiffany J. Marie holds a cup of coffee while speaking to the camera.
From left: Tiffany J. Marie holds a cup of coffee while speaking to the camera.
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"Would you go to therapy? Would you get healthy? Would you go to rehab? Would you stop drinking? Would you exercise? Would you better yourself as a human? Because dying for someone is easy. You just die … But living for your child; changing yourself; being introspective—that's love."
Marie said that her post was inspired by the hypocrisy she experiences as a child-free woman.
"There's a lot of pressure for women to have kids, a lot of people pushing the idea that you'll regret remaining without children, disregarding just how deeply we've considered the weight of responsibility that comes with parenting," Marie said.
She continued: "Almost all child-free people have thought about the impact of bringing a child into the world, and it made me wonder just how many parents have done the same."
Marie said living for a child means more than financial support or birthday parties.
"[It's] actively trying to end those generational traumas; it's admitting you're wrong sometimes and being able to apologize, making healthy choices in all categories of life; it's making positive change," Marie said.
"It's really something we should all be doing for ourselves, but if the love of a child is so much more intense than anything else, it seems that should be enough to motivate a parent to make those changes," she said.
Marie's reel, which been viewed over 10 million times, garnered a mixed response. Some comments included a handful of applause emoji.
"Outright dying is easier than dying to self. Love this perspective," one user wrote.
"Parent here. Bookmarking this. Brilliant," another commented.
However, not all parents agreed and questioned Tiffany's choice to be child-free.
"For someone who purports to be so happily childless this woman spends a lot of time on the internet worrying about those who do have kids," one user wrote.
Marriage and family therapist Becky Whetstone, Ph.D., told Newsweek that being a role model for mental, physical, and spiritual health is crucial for any parent.
"Words mean little in the end, but showing your children how to live life as a confident, balanced human, who nurtures their individuality outside the family and deals with life's obstacles head-on as a powerful, capable, healthy human is the best example of good parenting," Whetstone said.
Marie told Newsweek that her reel provoked a mixed reaction online.
"There's been a wonderful outpouring from parents who've shared they are living for their kids and making positive changes, but just as many comments from children of parents who've failed to measure up," Marie said.
"It shows that simply having children isn't going to fundamentally change someone who doesn't want to change, and love sometimes isn't enough."
