14 hours ago
Dear Mary: Where should I seat Hollywood stars at dinner?
Q. My husband and I have recently made very good friends with some neighbours in France. They know I am having a 60th birthday party in London and have assumed they will be invited too. My problem is one of these new friends is a world-famous Hollywood actor and his wife is famous in her own right. I am worried about where I will seat them. I wouldn't want to give the impression to a roomful of my oldest friends (none of whom is famous) that I think the 'stars' are more important than they are, but neither do I want to offend the stars, who I fear will expect to be next to us at the top table (and possibly even sitting side-by-side American style). What should I do?
– Name and address withheld
A. The Hollywood party veteran Graydon Carter, author of When the Going was Good: An Editor's Adventures During the Last Golden Age of Magazines kindly steps in to advise. 'Have two long tables if possible. No wider than 30 inches. You sit in the middle of one table and place your husband in the middle of the other, facing each other. Put the world-famous movie star across the table from you and the wife who is famous in her own right across from your husband. Find the most interesting four people among the rest and put them on either side of the famed couple. Then select the second most interesting group of four people and put two of them on either side of you and the other two on either side of your husband. Movie stars as a rule don't have a lot to say outside their own bubble of interests – themselves, their work, what you think of their work. So make sure there's sufficient alcohol and pray for the best.'
Q. I now live in Scotland but have a pied-à-terre with garden in London, normally rented out, which I'm going to use myself to give drinks to old friends. I've realised I only have 15 possible places to sit – but 50 coming and since these old friends are old now, most will want to sit. Help!
– J.B.-H., Edinburgh
A. Ask the most reliable guests to each bring their own chair to the party. If they are much-loved friends, they will think it fun to carry a collapsible chair to a social event and no more of a nuisance than wearing the correct kit for Royal Ascot.
Q. I have moved into a house with three other recent graduates, none of whom respects my ambition to learn mindfulness. How can I get any peace to listen to the app?
– T.W., London SW18
A. Churches are perfect venues in which to practise mindfulness (via headphones) undisturbed. They are spiritually appropriate and mainly empty.
